Starting a new life thread

[frivolousz21]

I went to see my doctor today about stress.

well we had a good long talk..he is just a MD..and instead of giving me something for it.

he recomended taking a multivitamen and I told him Ive taken 5-htp in the past..and he said was fine and take it when I wake up and before bed to help regulate my sleeping patterns.

He also recomended meditation...he said that will help me channel out my negative thoughts..

So does anyone meditate and where can I learn to do it?

He said its a good idea for me to start over in my mind even though my child custody isnt settled...it will give me new focus.

He said to take a week to just get "clean and clear"..then you can start planning how your going to change..but you need to get away from everything for a few days.

I really feel much better now..this past weekend I hit rock bottom for me...I was ready to shut er down.

anyways I will update this thread until I have changed my life into something much better then it is now.

 

[Bible_Belt]

Friv, the meditation thing, despite many of those who practice it not being the religious type, releases the same kind of happy chemicals in your brain that devout followers of religion get in their heads. The church lady screaming 'Praise Jesus!' every Sunday and the Zen Buddist guy sitting cross-legged on a mountaintop pondering all existence are getting high off the same buzz. Meditation is not much different from any other kind of high or escapism, legal or illegal. What you need is a way to mentally get away and enjoy a good buzz, which can be as innocuous as working out, meditating, and doing hobbies or activities that temporarily distract you from life.

 

[joekerr31]

meditation is nothing more than entering into a mental state where you are NOT thinking. or, at most, you are visualization about ONE thing. the best state of meditation is merely one where you stop thinking about anything.

you want the best no brainer method for meditation? jogging.

go jog for 30 minutes and you'll get the same effects that meditation gives you. you'll come back feeling refreshed and like your problems are no longer suffocating you.

 

[frivolousz21]

thanks for the replys.

since I do not have faith...and its never going to happen...I really need something in my life to give me that extra buzz..

and im sick of using alcohol for it...since that is a mirage.

 

[Charm]

Meditation is a practice and a skill in one package. That means it will take practice to master it so be patient. In the beginning for most people it is difficult to let the mind become queit and the chatter to slow down. We're used to giving our mental-chatter all our attention and meditation teaches us that our brain is like a monkey that doesn't stop chattering until we stop paying attention to the chatter.

One useful concept that might help you is to imagine each of your thoughts is like a leaf floating on a river. Pay attention to the flow of the river and as the leaves pass, allow them to pass without letting yourself be caught and consumed by any particular leaf, no matter the size, color, shape or importance that leaf appears to have. If this does happen, return your focus to the FLOW of the river.

Another useful meditation is counting the breaths. Sit down, close your eyes, focus on the inhales and count each inhale. When you can count 25 breaths without losing track, step it up.

You can sit in a comfortable upright posture, you won't need any lotus or full lotus positions to accomplish the goal of meditations. Just make sure you are upright and not in a Lazy-Boy or you'll be more likely to fall asleep then properly meditate.

Meditiation is like a relaxed awareness. You are fully awake, fully aware, yet your mind is queit and your senses become super-heightened.

 

[penkitten]

sometimes in the world we live in, it is often hard to figure out how to sit down in the quiet and blank out our minds and concentrate on nothing.
american indians , buddist monks , the hippies , and jesus himself all seemed to know how. sometimes they used starvation or dehydration to meditate and have visions, and sometimes some of these people just got high as heck in order to reach there utopia place.

i once read in a book that you could close your eyes and picture a door to december, where you would picture yourself going through a door, into complete white snow, and that you would feel better. maybe i did it wrong, but when i pictured the snow, i felt cold and got up to get a blanket, and i was done.

a self help exercise tape once fell into my hands, and i listened. it made you picture yourself on a beach, you could hear the waves in the background and smell the scent of the ocean. you felt the sun upon your legs slowly move up your body and bask in the glow. just as i felt good, someone barged in and that was the end of that.

now i just crank the music while in the shower. thats my time out time. its just me dancing around in the shower like a goof, and i stay in until the hot water runs out. i dont think of any issues of work or kids or bills or drama while i am in there. if its a bad week, i go through a lot of towels.

everyone is different and i am sure you will figure a way, even if it means going to some rifle range to shoot at a bull's eye.

 

[reset]

Here's a meditation technique I've picked up that works well for me, and it's very simple. Find a book that is about something positive, then choose a page or two that has a message that makes you feel good. Read the pages, then start over, this time counting every word on the page. This gives you something to concentrate on and it's really hard to screw it up. Then when you're done, do it again if you want to make sure you got the right count.

It sounds weird, but it has worked for me.

 

[iqqi]

meditation is nothing more than entering into a mental state where you are NOT thinking. or, at most, you are visualization about ONE thing. the best state of meditation is merely one where you stop thinking about anything.

This is it in a nutshell. I personally like to drive. I just drive on empty roads, with whatever music that fits my mood blasting. I am in a zone, and afterwards I am much more peaceful and have a better understanding of what is going on in my life. I go through a lot of gas.

 

[Interceptor]

I like to listen to relaxing meditation music. Or if Im outside, just listen to wind and sounds in the environment, like tees rustling. Take in natural beauty.
You can always do relaxing/deep breathing before you go to bed. Slow your heart rate down, and your breathing, and let go of physical and mental tension.

And I know it sounds like a broken record, but keeping a jourrnal lets you "mind dump" mental tension in that you dump out all the thoughts that take too much energy to keep "in mind". You're able to see your thoughts spiled out on paper, and gain perspective on your situation.

You can listen to some good stuff here:

http://www.hypnotica.org/privatedownloads.htm

 

[joekerr31]

http://youtube.com/watch?v=BZskWRwlaqE&mode=related&search=

friv, take a listen to this. watts describes meditation.

 

[3countriesPlan]

a new life can be accomplished by a change of location, job, and trying to cultivate new interests that benefit you ( no Warcraft is not a benefit).... I hit rock bottom earlier this year and moved away from my hometown, got more into beneficial hobbies, exercised, and got to know knew people...

perhaps you could go teach english abroad for awhile....

 

[frivolousz21]

a new life can be accomplished by a change of location, job, and trying to cultivate new interests that benefit you ( no Warcraft is not a benefit).... I hit rock bottom earlier this year and moved away from my hometown, got more into beneficial hobbies, exercised, and got to know knew people...

perhaps you could go teach english abroad for awhile....

haha....me teaching English = wont happen!

anyways....

Ive been eating low carbs for a few days...and iv'e made it to ketosis.

I also decided to stop drinking for a while...nothing until I see where that takes me....I feel like I cannot grow and evolve as a man if I'm drowning myself in a mirage.

court date thursday...I have the lawyer with me this time..I hope it works out.

 

[frivolousz21]

Its been one week since Ive had alcohol.

the first couple days were hard.but not so much now.

ive also been on low carb....6 days 20 grams of carbs or less...1 day of 100 or so carbs.

Im down 6 lbs on the scale and my pants are loosening up.

my face also looks less bloated from alcohol and weight..
another week of low carb now....I hope I am down 10 lbs by then.

Ive also been working overtime to make more money...Im not burnt out but I put in 12 hours of OT last week...nice bonus in the pay check

 

[ketostix]

court date thursday...I have the lawyer with me this time..I hope it works out.

Well how did the hearing go if you don't mind talking about that?

 

[frivolousz21]

they dropped the abuse case the day before.

because they knew the judge would award me visitation

the entire abuse case was a bogus to keep me away from my son...they are acting like some sick people.

so we are tying to negotiate for 5 days..if not Tuesday I am filling for an act of paternity to get joint custody.

what they are doing right now by not letting me see my son will destroy them when we go in for our custody hearing..

since they threw the abuse case out..it will be clear to the judge what they are doing.

 

[Interceptor]

Friv,

you gotta stay strong.

Keep going to the gym.
Eat healthy and WELLL!
make sure you are doin gsomething that stumulates your intellect.
Look into meditation, visualization techniques, deep breathing exercises, Yoga, and look into EFT.
Keep yourself together, man.

Keep doing what you;re doing.








FAITH.......is knowing that the future will be what you want it to be because of the ACTIONS you are doing TODAY.

 

[Gerard-890]

Please keep us updated and know that while it might seem like the world is against you, we are all here pulling for you through this time.

I really am not an expert in child custody cases, but if I could help I would.

 

[grinder]

You’ve gotten some excellent suggestions. Now, try out different things and see what works best. Everyone is different.

You’ve mentioned alcohol. It is the best seducer ever invented. Beware.

As Joekerr31 noted, many in Zen do not sit to meditate. For me, raking leaves, doing the dishes, and sweeping quiet the waters.

 

[wjh]

good luck bro

 

[frivolousz21]

last few nights ive been derailed by going out watching sport and having some beers with the boys.

time to get back on track...all in all ive lost some weight but my muscle mass is coming back pretty fast from working out hard.

but I need to go a week without even a beer....and keep my carbs under 20 and I can see another inch off the waist go.

I also have an eight day beard and Im really digging it...very full facial hair I have.