Spinning Plates while in an LTR

[edger]

I'm very curious to know what the reason was that your ex broke up with you. It's clearly framed you with a cynical view on women/relationships.

I've had a cynical view on women yrs before I got involved with my ex. Think about it, most women are pieces of sh*t, am I right? Even you said most women are messed up. Anyway, my "cynical" view developed in early 2000 when I began hanging out with this chick from college. She totally strung me along. I remember she'd flake out on me, show up late, not call me back, etc. etc. Now note at this time, I'd never experienced this kind of behavior with a woman before, not even in high school(high school's a whole other story, as my experience with women was a lot less complicated, if complicated at all. All I remember about high school, was how easy and smooth dealing with a woman was). So, now this chick comes along in college and pulling all these stunts, and I'm thinking to myself, "Jesus Christ, what the hell is going on here with this girl?" It was frustrating the sh*t out of me, to where I eventually asked her, "What the hell was up?", although it did no good, as she kept it up. Eventually I got rid of her, but not till after about a month went by. Now add on about several other chicks in the following year who would go on to do the same to varying degrees. That is what the "cynical" view is attributed to. Years of head games. This is what ALL guys will experience with the greater majority of females, the hot ones in particular. Then my ex who is pushing for marriage comes along, and forget it, my beliefs and perception of women become even stronger.

Yeah, my ex broke up with me because she claims our arguing made her fall out of love. Now note something here..when we argued, we never argued as if we were at each others throats. It was passive arguing. She did warn me prior that the arguing was affecting the relationship, which I understood and took seriously, as I didn't want to jeapordize anything, but she would do act in certain ways that I would feel wasn't "girlfriendish". For instance, a month before we broke up, before everything started spiralling downward, we had an argument because I was annoyed we weren't having sex as often as we used to(a common issue in relationships, I know). When I confronted her about it, you know what she tells me? "Well things change". That's what she tells me. This coming from a woman who according to her is her "soulmate, the one she wants to marry and be with forever eternally, the one she's never felt this way about before". So, we talk about how the sex has tapered off and cut it short. At this point I'm thinking to myself, "Well maybe she'll change now that I called her out on how the sex has tapered off, maybe she'll try to make an adjustment on her part, afterall, she is my girlfriend who is supposed to love me and show she loves me". Nope. She doesn't do anything to initiate sex like she used to, but at the same time, nor is she refusing it either. So, now at this point I'm thinking, "Ok, my girlfriend must not be into me anymore". So, the next time I go to initiate sex with her, I have all this stuff I'm telling you laying in the back of my mind. So, I go in one night to have sex with her, start taking my clothes off, but see she's not taking her's off. So, I'm thinking, "Yep, she's not into me and doesn't want to have sex". So, I confront her about it, and she goes on the defense. She starts to cry. After the argument ends, she tells me, "I feel distant from you", implying that the our constant arguing has made her feel this way. The arguing continues and everything just keeps spiraling downward. The day she breaks up with me, she tells me, "all the arguing stole something special we had and how she has lost her love for me". She tells me, "I was trying to see in the last month if I would get my love back, but it never came back." And that was that, it was over forever.

What pissed me off too, was how she attention wh*red with me, after we had broken up. I'm saying to myself, "Damn, this chick does enough damage, and now she's playing games and attention wh*ring with me on top of it. I couldn't believe it. That had solidified my beliefs about women even stronger. So there you go, now I guess you can see why I choose the path I choose.

Sorry to keep it so long dude, I just felt I had to explain in detail to better allow you to understand where I'm coming from, lol.

 

[DJKid]

Thanks for sharing your story. I totally understand how you feel as that clearly shows how unstable and erratic women can really be. That being said I think where a person is in their life has a lot to do with it too. I don't know how old you were when all that went down but I'm going to guess it was probably your early 20's.... Unfortunately a lot of women even in that age range are immature.

What is really sad though is that there are too many women like that out there these days and its through their actions that our perceptions of women as a gender are formed. I think this again leads to a vicious perpetual cycle of game playing, cheating, and disenchantment for both genders...

 

[edger]

I don't know how old you were when all that went down but I'm going to guess it was probably your early 20's.... Unfortunately a lot of women even in that age range are immature.

I had just turned 26, and she had just turned 25. Our birthdays are 2 months apart.

 

[edger]

What is really sad though is that there are too many women like that out there these days and its through their actions that our perceptions of women as a gender are formed. I think this again leads to a vicious perpetual cycle of game playing, cheating, and disenchantment for both genders...

I hear ya, and I've always held that same view(how it leads to a viscous perpetual cycle), but we can't forget, that WOMEN created this. They are reaping what they have sown. They have made a conscious decision to operate this way with men and allow for the "visious perpetual cycle". But what are you gonna do, this is how 98% of them wanna play, so we are forced to stick it right back to them, and unfortunately in the process, the "good natured" women of the world have to suffer for it. It's a shame.

 

[DJKid]

I hear ya, and I've always held that same view(how it leads to a viscous perpetual cycle), but we can't forget, that WOMEN created this. They are reaping what they have sown. They have made a conscious decision to operate this way with men and allow for the "visious perpetual cycle". But what are you gonna do, this is how 98% of them wanna play, so we are forced to play it back.

I don't even know if its a conscious decision on their part but regardless they do it lol... Believe me I could be here writing for a day with all the winners I've met throughout my life.

In a sense I feel the AFC man actually has a lot to do with creating this. I'm not even going to go into the whole feminized society theory because I think its pretty apparent that this world (at least the Western one) caters to women. But the fact that there are so many AFCs out there that are willing to bend to every whim a woman has really is what puts them on a pedestal. When a girl receives constant pedestal treatment and attention they naturally develop an ego and this results in the mindset and ctions of these girls walking around snooty. It also results in why so many girls think they can be super selective and come across as stuck up when you try to engage in friendly conversation. These actions get taught to their friends, cousins, daughters and have proliferated to what is the norm these days.

That's a realist view.

 

[DJKid]

This sucks.... of course when I'm in an LTR the opportunities seem to come from all angles....... I have a propisition tonight from a real cute plate

 

[Captain]

This sucks.... of course when I'm in an LTR the opportunities seem to come from all angles....... I have a propisition tonight from a real cute plate

So just do it. You can be in a long term relationship while still dating other women. But don't hide it from your girlfriend, let her know you're seeing other women. Of course, if you've agreed to be exclusive, you either have to stay exclusive, or tell ehr you want things to change.

A lot of men can't see that, and they think that long term relationships have to be exclusive, just like they thought that they had to be nice and buy expensive presents for a woman to like them.

 

[DJKid]

Yeah thats just it.... I wouldn't want her to mess with other dudes.... Not exactly fair huh?