Speeding up the process...little help with this one...

[marmel75]

Ok, met this chick online, went out twice so far, several makeout sessions on first date..initial @ss grab attempt swatted away, second attempt at car makeout was not.

Second date, more makeouts lasting longer in duration and intensity, ie, her forcefully pulling my head towards her with her hand on back of my head, repeated attempts at escalation swatted away(over course of night), although I did manage to get some titty grabbing in...noticed her breathing starting to get heavier and started kissing neck, but couldn't get any farther.

Towards end of evening noticed her placing her hand on my knee and rubbing the inside of my thigh and leaving it there while leaning into me...

Additionally she initiates hand holding when we are walking...

Not worried about the IL, moreso on how to get out of the "boyfriend" zone it looks like I am getting put in and get sex out of this sooner than later...actually want to turn her into a FB ...

Have tried pretty much everything that normally works and am not getting where I want to go as fast as I want...

Tips, tricks, hints guys? I think she is trying to bf me and make me wait, not really down for that...cool girl, we like hanging out together and have fun...not overly concerned about the outcome, so I'm up for pretty much anything...

 

[Asterisk]

seems like you've been spinning so many plates on pof it's not even funny....
why are you worried about one chick trying to boyfriend you?
btw, what happened to your "50 shades" game?

 

[betheman]

who is initiating the dates? you arent doing anything wrong, mayne worth cooling off, withdrawing a bit, when you are with her play it really cool, like you are less interested in sex and you need to be somewhere else soon?

 

[marmel75]

seems like you've been spinning so many plates on pof it's not even funny....
why are you worried about one chick trying to boyfriend you?
btw, what happened to your "50 shades" game?

Not really worried about it...more perplexed as to why what normally works isn't working, lol

50 shades worked OK with her but didn't lead where it normally does...

Would rather salvage a FB relationship with this one rather than having to cut her loose, but I'm not going down the wait for sex route either...also will help in.the future if I run into this again with another woman...

just looking for tips to get what I want out of this, that's all...definitely not worried...I actually am meeting up with a girl tonight who just gave me her number without me asking and told me she wants me to.come over and sit on my lap so we can read 50 shades together...I told her I doubt the reading would last long and she said me either, so its pretty much a slam dunk I am fvcking this chick tonight...

 

[Asterisk]

...more perplexed as to why what normally works isn't working, lol

i wouldn't say it isn't working, in fact it maybe working a little too well
i think she's trying to keep you all to herself by turning you into a boyfriend
you said you met her online, right? chicks online are most likely desperate.
i guess thats what happens when you run excellent game on desperate chicks lol

like betheman said, up the challenge a little, and she might accelerate the interaction

 

[Harry Wilmington]

Before I get into responding to various OP quotes, let me state this: for guys reading this that think the chick may NOT be interested as a result of her not responding positively to some of his gestures (i.e. the butt grab, the escalation, etc.), that may not be the case. If she's accepting dates regularly and not flaking, it could mean she's interested in him. Then again, it could mean she's just using him for dates. In either case, until either one of these things comes to light it's not worth dropping her just yet...

With that said, though, i'd like to respond to the following quotes:

Not worried about the IL, moreso on how to get out of the "boyfriend" zone it looks like I am getting put in... I think she is trying to bf me and make me wait, not really down for that...

This, my friends, is what we call an "ego justifier." It's something guys do when they're after a girl and making certain moves yet not getting what they want out of her.

Ego justifiers are created so that guys won't feel like they're failing at their progress with the girls they wants. It's very easy to do: all you have to do is point out a flaw that's occurring (i.e. "she won't go on a date with me") and give an excuse which may or may not be true (i.e. "it's because her friends told her I'm a jerk") so that you can justify it and find a way around it (i.e. "I just have to talk to her and convince her of why I'm not a jerk").

Ego justifiers, while helpful to guys in not letting their egos get bruised, also causes them to push out of their brains the common sense logic that would actually help them thrive better in the dating world and cause them less pain in the long run.

For example: In this instance, the OP has made the excuse that, because she's not giving it up right away, it must be because she sees him as BF material. This, despite the fact that:

1. They've only been on 2 dates
2. She has not yet asked him to be the boyfriend (or, as is usually the case, asked him if she can be his girlfriend)
3. Most girls who like a guy may wait 2 or 3 dates before giving it up... but this is RARELY the case, especially with girls online
4. Any attempts he's made to go further have all been blocked (minus the hand holding, of course, lol)

Now, this is not to say that she may not be interested in him in that way. However, based on current evidence, it appears as though she's either:

(a) not as interested in him as he thinks she is;
(b) is interested, but trying to take it slow;
(c) likes making out with guys to mess with them (hey, who doesn't like a good make-out session) but has her heart set on screwing someone else; or
(d) (and the most probable one) likes him, but finds him to be coming on too strong physically, thereby inhibiting her desire to take things further

And (d), my friends, is where most people on these boards falter. I'm going to do a post about this at some point, but in short: if YOU are the one that's constantly starting the kino and being all grabby and feely (especially towards certain body parts), you're c0ckblocking yourself.

A girl you just met isn't going to feel comfortable with you touching all over her. You have to get her to WANT to touch YOU first. Then, when you're making out, YOU have to be the one to dial it back a bit every so often. It's the whole "give and take" thing: you give her some physical play (i.e. making out) so it starts revving up her engine... and then you stop and lean back. If you do this, you'll find SHE will become the aggressor and move towards YOU to continue doing what you were doing.

If you do this enough times, SHE will be the one ripping off YOUR clothes. However, if you're never stopping during the make out, or constantly reaching for her most sexualized parts first, you're bound to inhibit her want of grabbing for YOU, and end up with a girl doing what this chick did: stopping the whole session just as it's about to REALLY get started.

Also: just as a sidebar, what's with all the guys on these boards wanting girls solely as a c*m deposit box? What happened to actually wanting to find a girl to date, go out with, show a good time and eventually get married to? I know almost everyone on here is a recovering nice guy, but GEEZ, man, how about going out with a girl that could be with you BEYOND just being an FB? FBs are over-rated and more trouble than they're worth.

 

[Trump]

what's with all the guys on these boards wanting girls solely as a c*m deposit box? What happened to actually wanting to find a girl to date, go out with, show a good time and eventually get married to? I know almost everyone on here is a recovering nice guy, but GEEZ, man, how about going out with a girl that could be with you BEYOND just being an FB? FBs are over-rated and more trouble than they're worth.

Lol. Come on bro, have you not spent time reading the posts on this site? Most guys on here just want to have sex as quickly as possible with little or no effort. They want to become players, have sex with models in high heels and red lipstick and tight skin dresses.

No one is on this site to ask how to date a women professor who looks mediocre and has ok body, they are looking for the Sharon Stone basic instinct type...sexy sexy sexy. Nothing wrong with that, just the way media brainwashes people.

For a relationship...a guy is not going to waste his time and money going on 5 or 6 dates in this dating and economic climate all while the girl is using him for her ego while sleeping with her bf when she comes home. Nowadays, if you go on several dates and spend money and she doesn't give it up, you are a sucker. She gave it up for the last guy quickly, why not me?

So many mind games...so little time.

 

[BeDJ]

No one is on this site to ask how to date a women professor who looks mediocre and has ok body, they are looking for the Sharon Stone basic instinct type...sexy sexy sexy. Nothing wrong with that, just the way media brainwashes people.

Why would I want a logical woman if we know for a fact they respond to emotion? They don't develop mentally past adolescence, so the ones that are always looking promiscuous are way ahead of the curve!

 

[marmel75]

Before I get into responding to various OP quotes, let me state this: for guys reading this that think the chick may NOT be interested as a result of her not responding positively to some of his gestures (i.e. the butt grab, the escalation, etc.), that may not be the case. If she's accepting dates regularly and not flaking, it could mean she's interested in him. Then again, it could mean she's just using him for dates. In either case, until either one of these things comes to light it's not worth dropping her just yet...

With that said, though, i'd like to respond to the following quotes:


This, my friends, is what we call an "ego justifier." It's something guys do when they're after a girl and making certain moves yet not getting what they want out of her.

Ego justifiers are created so that guys won't feel like they're failing at their progress with the girls they wants. It's very easy to do: all you have to do is point out a flaw that's occurring (i.e. "she won't go on a date with me") and give an excuse which may or may not be true (i.e. "it's because her friends told her I'm a jerk") so that you can justify it and find a way around it (i.e. "I just have to talk to her and convince her of why I'm not a jerk").

Ego justifiers, while helpful to guys in not letting their egos get bruised, also causes them to push out of their brains the common sense logic that would actually help them thrive better in the dating world and cause them less pain in the long run.

For example: In this instance, the OP has made the excuse that, because she's not giving it up right away, it must be because she sees him as BF material. This, despite the fact that:

1. They've only been on 2 dates
2. She has not yet asked him to be the boyfriend (or, as is usually the case, asked him if she can be his girlfriend)
3. Most girls who like a guy may wait 2 or 3 dates before giving it up... but this is RARELY the case, especially with girls online
4. Any attempts he's made to go further have all been blocked (minus the hand holding, of course, lol)

Now, this is not to say that she may not be interested in him in that way. However, based on current evidence, it appears as though she's either:

(a) not as interested in him as he thinks she is;
(b) is interested, but trying to take it slow;
(c) likes making out with guys to mess with them (hey, who doesn't like a good make-out session) but has her heart set on screwing someone else; or
(d) (and the most probable one) likes him, but finds him to be coming on too strong physically, thereby inhibiting her desire to take things further

And (d), my friends, is where most people on these boards falter. I'm going to do a post about this at some point, but in short: if YOU are the one that's constantly starting the kino and being all grabby and feely (especially towards certain body parts), you're c0ckblocking yourself.

A girl you just met isn't going to feel comfortable with you touching all over her. You have to get her to WANT to touch YOU first. Then, when you're making out, YOU have to be the one to dial it back a bit every so often. It's the whole "give and take" thing: you give her some physical play (i.e. making out) so it starts revving up her engine... and then you stop and lean back. If you do this, you'll find SHE will become the aggressor and move towards YOU to continue doing what you were doing.

If you do this enough times, SHE will be the one ripping off YOUR clothes. However, if you're never stopping during the make out, or constantly reaching for her most sexualized parts first, you're bound to inhibit her want of grabbing for YOU, and end up with a girl doing what this chick did: stopping the whole session just as it's about to REALLY get started.

Also: just as a sidebar, what's with all the guys on these boards wanting girls solely as a c*m deposit box? What happened to actually wanting to find a girl to date, go out with, show a good time and eventually get married to? I know almost everyone on here is a recovering nice guy, but GEEZ, man, how about going out with a girl that could be with you BEYOND just being an FB? FBs are over-rated and more trouble than they're worth.

Interesting points Harry. I just gave my opinion of whats going on based on all the things that have occurred and what she has said. I asked her out initially 2 weks ago, said it wasn't good cause her family was in town from Alabama and was busy all week, but asked about next week. Told her if I was still available, sure. She texted me the following Monday and asked if I was still available. Went out Tuesday night, within 15 minutes she had already started talking about what we should do for our next date. Told her to come have a drink with me Friday night(worked 14 hours that day and was kinda tired, didn't want to meet someone new in that condition, lol). Things went really well, left first palce because music was too loud, walked to second place and she grabbed my hand tight as we walked, got to second place, went over to a dark corner with a super comfortable leather sectional and she just leaned up against me the whole time. Several times when we were making out, I went to pull away and she grabbed my head and pulled it closer and kept going. Left and she grabbed my hand tight again. She initiated makout in car before leaving(she dropped me off by my car because it was very windy and cold out).

Based on what I have experienced in the past, I would say she has a pretty high IL in me...

I will definitely work on cutting her off and seeing if she ramps it up...tanks for the input as always!

 

[Desdinova]

Not worried about the IL, moreso on how to get out of the "boyfriend" zone it looks like I am getting put in and get sex out of this sooner than later...actually want to turn her into a FB ...

Have tried pretty much everything that normally works and am not getting where I want to go as fast as I want...

What you wrote here is incredibly confusing. The progress of how this is turning out is pretty much standard for me. I usually end up fvcking women by the 3rd or 4th date.

If you want to turn her into a fb, then you need to resist the relationship status. Don't talk about being in a relationship, let her bring that up. When she talks about it in any way, shape, or form, just let her know that you're not ready for anything too serious right now.

If you're having trouble trying to fvck her, then you need to create the opportunity. You need to invite her over (or invite yourself over to her place) watch a movie (preferably in bed) and things will just happen naturally. You already have the IL, you've broken the sexual barriers, so all you need to do is create the atmosphere.

 

[Bumsniff]

I'm wondering how the OP who is married with children has that much free time to meet, bang and or date all these women online?

Is this an open marriage or is the wife in denial or completely unaware? WTF?