SoSuave Brothers, please help me out with this text. Thanks.

[Mr Nigma]

Long story short, I met this girl online. We hit it off. I got her number, texted her and set up a date.

On the day of the date, she flaked (came up with an obvious lie about being called into work when she already told me in a previous conversation that she's only in school).

I brushed it aside and sent a text suggesting a reschedule date. I got no reply. So a week and half later, I sent her a text saying "I guess the fade out is your way of saying no. No worries, I can take no for an answer".

I got no response again so I deleted her number and have been seeing other people since then. That was about a week ago.

Yesterday morning, I got a text from her (but I didn't know it was her)

Her: What's up?

(I didn't reply until a day later)
Me: who is this??

(She replied within a minute)
Her: It's xxxxxxx.

Me: oh.

Her: What's up .. I'm so sorry for being a complete ***** last week.

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I haven't replied yet. Brothers, help me out here. I want to get the best possible frame from this as much as possible. What should be my next response and course of action from this point?

 

[MtnMan]

her other better options didnt work out and you are next in line?

 

[Vice]

next time a girl flakes, respond with "K", "Kk", "Ok cool", "K cool", or some permutation thereof. Don't try to reschedule, let her do that work.

Then a few days later invite her out to some social event (less social pressure for her to act in any specific role since it's not a "date").

And don't be Mr. Butthurt and say sh*t like "I guess the fade out is your way of saying no. No worries, I can take no for an answer". Don't pretend you deleted her number.

You're meeting random people. Random people have random life situations. Just because she was in school doesn't mean she doesn't have a job. You're not required to let others know your entire life situation and social/time obligations. She might have had a legitimate reason to flake; she might have not. Either way, you can't control it. Being butthurt only makes you less attractive.

 

[Married Buried]

text her back

"I forgive you this time but don't let it happen again"

Then if she replies tell her a time and a place to meet you.

 

[gravityeyelids]

Maybe something like "Normally, i give a girl one chance to flake out on me and then move on. It's disrespectful and I won't waste my time. Convince me why I should make an exception for you."

 

[Starfvcks 64]

I agree with Malice.
Something like "don't let it happen again."
I've used that before (a few times) and it always get's good reactions.
It's authoritative.

The keyword is "again"
which shows you are still interested enough for HER to try to reschedule.

She'll definitely pick up on it.

 

[Robert28]

I swear I NEVER had to deal with flakiness until I got older (after college). Never. Not once. It must be some new phenomenon with women or some sh!t. All I know is it gets old really fast and my time is too valuable to put up with bs like that. Life is too d@mn short too.

 

[gravityeyelids]

I swear I NEVER had to deal with flakiness until I got older (after college). Never. Not once. It must be some new phenomenon with women or some sh!t. All I know is it gets old really fast and my time is too valuable to put up with bs like that. Life is too d@mn short too.

I want to know where you went to college. I'm at a party school and girls are flakey as fvck! They're like little fish in a pond. One false move and they skitter away, never to be seen again.

 

[Robert28]

I want to know where you went to college. I'm at a party school and girls are flakey as fvck! They're like little fish in a pond. One false move and they skitter away, never to be seen again.

Well, keep in mind I graduated from college in 2007 and a lot of crap has changed in the dating game since then. It also helped that my college was 68% female so they had to walk a fine line with the guys or risk being lonely.haha

 

[Robert28]

Long story short, I met this girl online. We hit it off. I got her number, texted her and set up a date.

On the day of the date, she flaked (came up with an obvious lie about being called into work when she already told me in a previous conversation that she's only in school).

I brushed it aside and sent a text suggesting a reschedule date. I got no reply. So a week and half later, I sent her a text saying "I guess the fade out is your way of saying no. No worries, I can take no for an answer".

I got no response again so I deleted her number and have been seeing other people since then. That was about a week ago.

Yesterday morning, I got a text from her (but I didn't know it was her)

Her: What's up?

(I didn't reply until a day later)
Me: who is this??

(She replied within a minute)
Her: It's xxxxxxx.

Me: oh.

Her: What's up .. I'm so sorry for being a complete ***** last week.

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I haven't replied yet. Brothers, help me out here. I want to get the best possible frame from this as much as possible. What should be my next response and course of action from this point?

Here's what most likely happened. Her ex got in touch with her the day of or day before ya'll were supposed to go out. She thought he wanted to get back together, all he was thinking was "I need to get a nut, let me call up my ex". They did the nasty and then he started dating someone else later that week and she found out. Now she's going to use you for revenge on him and attempt to make him jealous. You're the most recent guy she met, hence why she contacted you and acted aloof as if nothing ever happened, figuring you wouldn't mind that she flaked and slutted it up with her ex. Now you'll be her facebook status when ya'll go out and she's hoping her ex will read it and care. He might and text her that night ya'll are out and she will have her nose in her phone all night and not pay you any attention. Then she will say something like "I'm sorry I'm not being any fun tonight, have a lot on my mind" or maybe she'll come right out and tell you that her ex is jealous ya'll are out, who knows. All I know is this juice ain't worth the squeeze.

 

[buzzin_frog]

On the day of the date, she flaked (came up with an obvious lie about being called into work when she already told me in a previous conversation that she's only in school).

When a chick blatantly lies to you....it should be game over!!

She just lost your trust

That means she is disrespecting you, she doesn't think too highly of you, she doesn't care to be with you, she doesn't really give a sh!t about you....you're not the top priority!!

Don't chase after chicks who lie and flake on you

Don't chase after chicks who ignore you

Don't keep chasing after chicks who are making a fool out of you

Don't chase after chicks who have you as the back up guy as the last resort

That's not the guy you want to be....especially with a chick that lies to you

I brushed it aside and sent a text suggesting a reschedule date. I got no reply. So a week and half later, I sent her a text saying "I guess the fade out is your way of saying no. No worries, I can take no for an answer".

Why the hell would you brush that a side? No chick is worth hanging around to be made a fool out of....and that's what she did to you.....you should remember that!!

I got no response again so I deleted her number and have been seeing other people since then. That was about a week ago.

You're seeing other chicks......this chick should be irrelevant.....continue to ignore her because that's what she did to you!!

What happened was, the dude that was her #1 pounded her good on the day of your date, while she lied to you.....then he dumped her ass.....she sat there and cried.....and now she has nobody else at the moment, so she is apologizing to you through text, hoping that you will be dumb enough to accept her apology and go out with her.

You weren't good enough for her the last week because she ignored you the whole time...and now that she has no options at the moment, you are the guy....is that what you want?....I sure as hell wouldn't.

 

[Bradical]

Women like this never change. Once you see that pattern of flaking begin, your should RUN.....FAST! She's not worth the wasted energy only to discover what you already know about her. How many times do you have to touch the hot stove before you realize that it burns?

 

[Mr Nigm@]

Forgot my password so I just made this account to post an update.

So I eventually replied to her and this was the convo:

Me: nothing. just studying and finishing up some work.
Her: How has ur week been
Me: Listen to me, (her name). I'm a very busy man and flaky girls really turn me off. I forgive you this time but don't let it happen again.
Her: Okay. I'm really, really sorry.

I didn't reply after that. This afternoon, I got a text from her.
Her: Hey. How are u
Me: Hey, I'm doing good.
Her: We should get some coffee soon if you're still open to it.
Me: I can make some time Tuesday evening after work. How's that?
Her: Tuesday evening works fine
Me: Same place as before?
Her: Yeah. Same place.
Me: Cool. See you then.
Her: See you too.

Well, we'll see how it goes. I'm not expecting a flake but it feels kind of weird to have a date with her after what has happened over the past few days. I'll post an update about how it goes. Thanks for the responses.

 

[Mr Nigm@]

her other better options didnt work out and you are next in line?

Funny enough, your post was accurate. Lol. Yup. Her other options didn't work out. We ended up just meeting tonight because it will be too cold tomorrow to go out.

She kept apologizing about flaking and was like she was really busy with work and stuff and how she was "trying to get a guy out of her life". I guess that says it all. Lol. The date went well but I'm definitely spinning my other plates hard.

 

[Married Buried]

Funny enough, your post was accurate. Lol. Yup. Her other options didn't work out. We ended up just meeting tonight because it will be too cold tomorrow to go out.

She kept apologizing about flaking and was like she was really busy with work and stuff and how she was "trying to get a guy out of her life". I guess that says it all. Lol. The date went well but I'm definitely spinning my other plates hard.

Who cares about the other guy? Did you try and kiss her, or escalate?

You probably could have gotten into her pants if you took charge, don't tell me you didn't make a move? The best way they forget about the other guy is hopping on YOUR c0ck!

She threw her p/ssy up into the air and you swing and missed.

 

[Mr Nigm@]

Who cares about the other guy? Did you try and kiss her, or escalate?

You probably could have gotten into her pants if you took charge, don't tell me you didn't make a move? The best way they forget about the other guy is hopping on YOUR c0ck!

She threw her p/ssy up into the air and you swing and missed.

I kiss closed but that was it. It started snowing hard and she had to drive an hour downtown for an appointment but she suggested a second date so I'll hit her up during the week and set it. I'm definitely going to escalate harder. I'll post updates then.

 

[marmel75]

Tell her "Guess you will have to make it up to me then" and then when she responds "What did you have in mind or How?" then come up with something whether its going out and her buying you a drink, or whatever...

You didn't make yourself look too good in that opening salvo there...

 

[triplekaioken]

Here's what most likely happened. Her ex got in touch with her the day of or day before ya'll were supposed to go out. She thought he wanted to get back together, all he was thinking was "I need to get a nut, let me call up my ex". They did the nasty and then he started dating someone else later that week and she found out. Now she's going to use you for revenge on him and attempt to make him jealous. You're the most recent guy she met, hence why she contacted you and acted aloof as if nothing ever happened, figuring you wouldn't mind that she flaked and slutted it up with her ex. Now you'll be her facebook status when ya'll go out and she's hoping her ex will read it and care. He might and text her that night ya'll are out and she will have her nose in her phone all night and not pay you any attention. Then she will say something like "I'm sorry I'm not being any fun tonight, have a lot on my mind" or maybe she'll come right out and tell you that her ex is jealous ya'll are out, who knows. All I know is this juice ain't worth the squeeze.

love it. i love this forum you guys have cleared my mind so much. tbh, girls are starting to become SO EASY to figure out but the problem i think is that guy's try to make too many excuses for women instead of trusting their instincts.

if a girl flakes, tbh if anyone flakes, that means THAT PERSON ISNT INTERESTED. when someone is interested, trust me they will find a way to be there. if they can't, they will tell you when they can.

i remember girls that used to be so into me. i could just say: meet me here at this time. her response would be 'ok sounds good' no excuses, simple.


one thing i learnt also and it's linked to chasing her, is if you put a date/time/location to a woman. she says no and doesnt really offer a time when she can make it. i would keep on trying to get SOME KIND of confirmation, even if it wasnt on my terms. she will most likely say okay because she is being nice. but you can almost garuantee she's going to flake and isnt seeing you.

i've also learnt women do these sh1t tests (i never used to pay attention to them) but now they make perfect sense. when you put an offer down on the table and she declines.....that doesnt nessecarily mean no, it actually means, she is trying to figure you out and see how far you are going to bend to her will. if you pass = she will meet you. if you fail = flake, less contact on her part. recognizing these games is crucial and once it's mastered, wow, puss3y galore

men have all the power in this game, they just need some educating and reality checks.

 

[Yewki]

next time a girl flakes, respond with "K", "Kk", "Ok cool", "K cool", or some permutation thereof. Don't try to reschedule, let her do that work.

When you respond with those it's pretty obvious you're hurt and in defense mode IMO

 

[Mr Nigm@]

When you respond with those it's pretty obvious you're hurt and in defense mode IMO

Yeah and she will detect it. I think having a two strike rule with flaking is fair enough. Life happens and if she flakes once with a reasonable explanation, she should get a pass. A second time and you should probably next her. However, a girl that is very interested will also counter offer with another day instead of outright saying she can't make it.