Something i want you all to contribute in

[Sammo]

I may be a slow individual, but it has recently dawned on me that people do know what to do, there just not ****en doing it. There is so much stuff in the bible, the forum, the internet, the library, in your school books which you can improve on. WHAT to improve on isn't the problem, it is doing it thats the problem.

Now we do know there are a few people here who have made that first step, that step which made them start improving. That FIRST step which begun everything.

So what i want all you guys who have improved yourself to tell us is. What got you going?

What thought, moment, catch phrase, person, comment, whatever, actually made you go to the gym, approach that chick, do your homework, start being more social.

What made you do it??

If we can get alot of good **** out of this then maybe more people will start DOING and then we can get on to discussing more advanced social techniques, wont that be exciting.

 

[comic_relief]

What made me...

start lifting
me not even able to lift 45 pounds thirty times. Now I am able to lift 110 pounds 30 times (I don't do lifting on a regular basis)

approach
I realized that I was going to die with alot of regret

start eating right
not wanting to become fat and not getting diabetes like almost 50%+ of my family has

improve everything else
finding this site

 

[WrEcKLeSS2000]

The things that I have improved on is my mindset, I used to be incredibly desperate and all I could think about was getting a girl all the time even though I wasn't getting one...

I've read alot of posts recently regarding this like Pook's "Kill that desperation", and also I've read alot of good quotes from people....


Now I can proudly say I am no longer desperate and don't need a girl to be happy or complete myself...

I do feel however that having a girlfriend or at least dating a girl could be a good thing because companionship is a part of human nature I feel. As long as its not made out to be a desperate/needy thing..


Also, I've been going to the gym for a long time, so thats nothing new..


Been doing things that I enjoy...

The one thing I need to improve on is actually trying to get a girl, Since I'm alot happier these days, I should at least try and approach and go for girls more often...

But I do feel better now a days...

 

[Wonderbread166]

"...It's the pain in your muscles, and the aching...and go on and go on and go on...and these last two or three or four repetitions, that's what makes actually the muscle then grow. That's what divides one from being a champion from not being a champion. If you can go through this pain barrier, you make it to be a champion...if you can't go through, forget it.

That's what most people lack, is in this having the guts- the guts to go in and just say, "I go through and I don't care what happens...You know?

It aches, and if I fall down...I have I have no fear of fainting in the gym - because it could happen. I threw up many times while I was working out, but it doesn't matter, because it's all worth it."

-Arnold (Pumping Iron)

Nice idea, Sammo

 

[gav]

what underlies the following is the attainment of self-discipline, which has forced consistency in all of these

weight lifting
insecurity about being a 135lb skinny bytch, feeling weak in the company of others because of this. so i wanted to look good naked and feel strong physically.

eating well
to feel good physically, to get the necessary food to gain muscle

getting rid of shyness and speaking up
i'm an attention wh0re. the quote "it's better to be talked about than not talked about". and it feels good to express my opinions

approaching
this is not my strongest point, but when i have approached, i've been filled with testosterone, energy and happiness (almost forgot; beer as well) before it, then after it, those three things did nothing but increase

doing schoolwork
at the moment, this is not my strongest point, but when i was a studyfreak, i focussed on one test at a time. when i had to study, i would definitely study because if i didn't, i would end up in a dead end job like my dad. failing is still not an option for me.

i know those aren't the best things to fuel motivation because a lot of my motivation revolves around insecurity, but it's the truth.

 

[Zoso]

weight lifting
insecurity about being a 135lb skinny bytch, feeling weak in the company of others because of this. so i wanted to look good naked and feel strong physically.

eating well
to feel good physically, to get the necessary food to gain muscle

Right now I weigh around 140-145 lbs. I started lifting this summer but so far haven't seen much results. Could you describe what you've done to get success with this? Like how often you lift, how your diet has changed, etc. What's the trick to it? It seems like it's impossible for me to gain weight.

 

[-.-]

Originally posted by Zoso
Right now I weigh around 140-145 lbs. I started lifting this summer but so far haven't seen much results. Could you describe what you've done to get success with this? Like how often you lift, how your diet has changed, etc. What's the trick to it? It seems like it's impossible for me to gain weight.

I shall point you to the right direction: http://forum.bodybuilding.com/

 

[LikRetsam]

What got me to go through? Too easy!

EGO

 

[Wacky-1]

I made a similar thread about exactly what makes us improve.Search it up if you want, it's not that far away."I'm Hungry, Are you?".
I believe that hunger for something will force one into action.But what cultivates hunger?Of course, the cultivation can be done from this site, but it's all up to you.How BAD do you want something?Do you really want to suck at something all your life?These are the questions that spur motivation.

Schoolwork
-
I'm a goal oriented person, so I have a clear idea about what I want to do and how to go about achieving it.So all I have to do is do it.The motivation comes from wanting to be the best.If you truly want to be the best, and work hard for it, 9 times out of 10, you'll get it.That's for schoolwork.

Approaching
-
I'm still working on this.I do give it a shot, but I'm still not too good at it.The heck of it!Never give up!


Closing
-I think that what truly makes someone do something is desire and hunger.I mean, we just have to take one look at ourself.Why are we here?Originally, for me, it was for learning how to be better with girls.Now, it's about improving my life.Why do you want to do that?Why do you want to improve?It's simply because you have a hunger or desire to change for the better.And to cultivate that hunger, I can recommend no better teachers than pain and pleasure.I've had my fair share, and the key is to learn from this.I remember a great quote I read somewhere, "The rain of tears is necessary for the harvest of success".

And what's my own personal motivation catch-phrase?
Feel free to make it your own.
"Dream it.Dare it.Do it."
Simple 3 part process to psyche you up for anything.
i.e.
1.Dream about the positive results, let's take gym for example, to keep you motivated to go to the gym, you have to dream that ripped body...
2.Get your balls ready to accomplish something worthwhile.Embrace the challenge, and more importantly, the NEWFOUND HUNGER that comes with it.
3.Do it.Nuff' said.

Hope that's been a help!

 

[blue17]

Lifting

Had a lot of spare time in the summer, and decided I'd pick up another hobby...weight training. I finally realized that my skinny frame could only hurt my chances in getting girls. I figured if I my body from bone to fat and muscle...it would help my chances greatly. It also makes you feel good about yourself and gives you that extra confidence.

Zoso, in order to build muscle when you are skinny...you have to eat like a hog. You can't just eat when your stomach is growling...you have to eat when you aren't even hungry. (don't eat when you're full...). It becomes a job at first....you just eat and eat and eat. If you get your proteins (meats, eggs) and eat everything in sight....you should be gaining fat and muscle.


Eating Healthy

This tied in with wanting to gain weight and looking better. I learned that junk food (especially pop) are just empty calories. They don't have protein, don't have carbs...all they do is fill you up. This is why I cut out soda out of my diet entirely. It offers no nutritional value.....just has empty sugar. However.....I haven't cut out ice cream. It is a decent source of protein, and it has a lot of fat which is good for gaining a little fat. I just recommend cutting out soda...it is fairly easy to do, and it'll help you gain weight. Instead of filling up your hunger with sugar filled liquids...you could be eating food with lots of carbs or protein which will affect your body in a positive way.

Approaching

I was at an after grad party at a restaurant....and there was a dance floor. The situation was pretty much like a club...girls and guys freak dancing, lots of rap and techno music, great for movin. So this girl i was interested in was dancing with lots of guys, I was a bit jealous. (i thought she might have been interested in me at the time as well). I had never freak danced b4...so i was also very nervous. She was dancing with people she didnt know very well...so I thought I might be able to join in too. I chickened out....i went downstairs to join my friends in some gambling. I couldn't even concentrate because I felt terrible about not going up to her...cuz I was too scurred to approach the girl and initiate a dance. So I went back upstairs to the dance floor...in hopes I would somehow build up enough courage (or i wanted to see the girl dancing just to torture myself). At that point...I finally realized I had to go up to her. I knew that if I didn't even approach her to freak dance...i would feel like total sh*t. (I alrdy had felt that way and the night wasn't over). So i just went up to her...I was nervous as hell. I walked up...she said "hi!!" like she was really excited to see me...and that eased the tension right off the bat. Her positive response made the situation that much easier. But anyway....it was my first time freak dancing, it was really fun and I didn't think i did too bad. Afterwards I felt 10x better. It wasn't even really due to the fact that I danced with the girl I liked....but rather that I overcame a big fear in A) approaching B) freak dancing....2 things i hadn't ever done b4. I felt a lot more confident, and felt so good knowing I had atleast given it a shot...and it worked out pretty well. I know now that in similar situations it will be 50 times easier to approach someone. The main reason that got my approaching is that I knew I would feel like sh*t if I didn't do it....and that I wouldn't get this chance again. It was either there or never.....and I chose to take control.

The story I told prolly sounds really stupid to a lot of you...but when you are really shy and nervous these little steps help a lot. Keep in mind I was an AFC back then.....and I've learned a lot since reading this board, and I hope to continue my improvement when school starts in 3 weeks.

 

[jonny football hero]

lifting wieghts i am quite small next to all my mates, so i didn't want to look too skinny

getting a job i saw the same episiode of neighbours twice in one day, and thought"wtf?"

Studying Simple. Because i want to be rich.

Approaching/improving my looks didn't want to be the 50 year old virgin

 

[Retrothe80sninja]

Weight lifting: Just to get stronger/healthier and also to help in swordfighting. (European style, 60 lbs of armor + 20 lbs shield + 20 lbs sword means I need to be realy strong.)

Studying: I finally found my passion and I am working towards an ocupation studying sea slugs, yes you heard me right, sea slugs.

Eating Healthy: Trying to get a healthier lifestyle and also because I discovered the delisciousness of salads. :>

Approaching: Wanted to be more confident meeting new people, and not just women, I want to find alot of new, intelligent friends as the majority of my current ones are complete fools. Also ridding myself of any remenants of Oneitis.

Person: My older friend Sam, who has now moved to Kentucky...he always seemed to enjoy life a huge amount, he earned respect from others, had the courage to do most anything (which wasn't always good...) and had chicks crawling over each other to get to him. He was realy very inspirational.

Personal Catch phrase: Well, I don't have a specific phrase but whenever I start getting too cowardly to do something (approach a hot girl, etc.) I start mentally calling myself variations of a cowardly **** and then I have to prove myself wrong by making the approach. :>

~Retro

 

[Nightbreed]

I'd spent most of my childhood and early teenager life as a psuedo-science/philosophy person and a bit of a loner by choice. I was pretty much okay with it until the big boom, around 17 years old, where everyone was going off with girls, or guys, whatever, and was too busy for me because they didn't want a third wheel. Now whenever I called, it wasn't a good time. Whenever I was there, I couldn't join in because it was a load of couples and then me. One time I stopped walking and they all carried on ahead into the night and never noticed I was no longer among them (in a way was I ever? I don't know...) all. I pulled my hood up and walked off down an alleyway in old Horsham town. Alone.

Well, I had my alternate personalities for company...

But anyway it really got me going how people had decreed me as useless, like i was worthless to society or something the same way heroin addicts are seen in some countries (China I think). I was just absolutely mortified that everyone had become so nasty now they had a girl or a guy.

By this point I was homeless, but refused to sacrifice my dignity to begging, so I was really a loner now without one life line to count. Why? because everyone decided having a girl (or guy) was the most important thing.

I vowed to go out there and get myself a girl. More than one girl. And have time for all of them. But to first and foremost have time for me! I would take care of myself, because no one else would. I would prove to myself that I was not at fault, that it was all those people I used to know who were to blame for casting me aside when they got a partner, it was not my doing because if I could get a girl (or more) and still not deem them the priority over each other, or me, then they could've too.

Unfortunately I got poisoned and almost died but when I got back up (okay it was 2001, lot of time had passed) even more so I knew I was alone. I decided no one can take from someone what they deserve. I still had my life. So I was going to go and live it and get what else I still deserved, women. Considering how much of a wussy I had been made into (I had amnesia, a walking aid) in the sense of depending on others it goes to show what attitude can do. It's what's inside that counts.

Eventually the crowning moment was two girls I met in late 2001 when I still shuffled a lot, who I thought I was well and truly LJBF'D with, were drinking with me (this is just over a year and a bit ago) and I managed to seduce them both into being naked, I got naked, we had one heck of a time.

Okay I know I've gone off on tangents here but rounding up...

WHAT GOT ME STARTED: Betrayal and abandonment I didn't deserve.

WHAT FUELLED ME: To be a better person.

WHAT GOT IN MY WAY: A lot.

WHAT HAPPENED: I won.

WHY: Attitude.

"I can handle anything."

"You are a guest in my reality."

"Everyone should get what they deserve. So reject what you don't deserve, and earn what you want until you deserve it."

And of course the signature quote below.

 

[Anchorman]

What made me take up change: anger and frustration

What still fuels me to keep changing for the better: fear of regret, ego, gut feeling that tells me just to go for something

 

[Need-2-B-Pimpin]

To me: The mind game changed it all. I realized that I was in control of my thoughts, emotions, reactions and realized that I could choose and shape myself as I pleased. This led me to a no-excuses attitude ("No time to be tired"- my motivational phrase since during the school year, I don't get enough sleep.) and I work out and everything now. Life is good.

 

[jiza101]

Do weights:
going to shoolies, and my mate got me to do it with him every friday.

chicks:
pornos, and not being regretful when im in my death bed.

 

[Eternal]

What make me change

 

[The Antichrist_Star]

It was the day my biggest crush ever told me on my bed this sentence...

"You need to get a life.."

And well...

 

[AFK Protector]

I loved a girl. I searched everywhere...even borrowed books on how to pic up women. Keep in mind I'm 15 here.

So I find this site and I get SERVED with all this info.

Then she gets hooked up.

But not only hooked up. Maybe it was just me, but I swear I never leaked out my feelings for her...maybe once online by accident in a chatroom, but never. Anyways, maybe it was just me, but everywhere I went..there they were...and immediately started kissing and touching and hugging and I had to look away or even take a longer route.

I almost quit. I felt like sh1t. I even wanted to cry and hurt myself. But I saw this South Park episode where Stan loses Wendy and he's all depressed, turns goth, but then realizes life is more than that. And that to feel sadness, you must have felt happiness before. You gotta take the good with the bad. Gotta roll with the punches. And not to be boastful, but I've always been a kind person and I don't plan on changing that, but people have begun to view me as too serious and stuff. So I became funny after 1 year of just....assimilating a humourous attitude until it became my own.

I became fit...got a lot more healthy and I look 10X greater than before. Girls actually approach ME now and try to start convos. I felt great. Until the girl I loved....the girl I lost....waltzess back into my life. They broke up...and now she's available...and I'm this fun active, lean, funny, Alpha guy. So she's been leaning towards me, but I just couldn't do it. I mean, I can't blame her for NOT hooking up with me...but it just hurt so much. Every man has a weakness. She was mine. I'm afraid if I get with her, all this improvment will go out the window. I can't let that happen. No girl is worth my own self-worth and well-being.

There's also the thing about bros before hos. I couldn't do it. My damn mind kept thinking about how I could work around it and maybe not let him find out. But now, I'm going to LJBF her. It hurts so damn bad I need her outta me life. I can't run forever, but maybe one day I'll be ready.

That's the story of my life so far.

 

[DJoneday]

It all started with an online game similar to everquest back a couple years ago. I was part of a hackers site for this game, and one day someone in one of the forums sent me a link to this site. I had been labeled as a nice guy my whole life and while I hung out with chicks, none of the ones I wanted ever seemed to give me the time of day.

That made me get fed up with everything, so I started reading this site. At first I shyed away from even the girls I did hang out with, and worked on some new hobbies (skateboarding, guitar). Pretty soon after the girls started comming to me... the rest is history.