Some advice needed

[ThaMac]

I have a girlfriend we've been like 2,5 years together. In the beginning we had sex for like every other day. This slowly began to decrease with the course of time. Now we have sex like 2 times a month,because most of the time she's too "tired"/ "lazy"(bullcrap)or isnt in the mood(bullcrap). If i ask for a bj instead she would do it but not all the times. This is really starting to piss me off because im horny as f*** and i cant do nothing about it either. Everytime i bring this subject she gets angry..

p.s We are living together

Srry for the bad english..

 

[ThaMac]

i still love her though and i know she does too

 

[betheman]

start hanging around and showing an interest in other girls and stop spending so much time with your gf

 

[ovi789]

Well man if you feel her so much then just don't let her go cause real one's don't come everyday ......

 

[ThaMac]

I dont want to let her go i just want more sex from her !

 

[runner83]

Iron Rule of Tomassi #3

Any woman who makes you wait for sex, or by her actions implies she is making you wait for sex; the sex is NEVER worth the wait.

When a woman makes you wait for sex you are not her highest priority. Sexuality is spontaneous chemical reaction between two parties, not a process of negotiation. It's sex first, then relationship, not the other way around. A woman who wants to ƒuck you will find a way to ƒuck you. She will fly across the country, crawl under barbwire, climb in through your second story bedroom window, ƒuck the sh!t out of you and wait patiently inside your closet if your wife comes home early from work - women who want to ƒuck will find a way to ƒuck. The girl who tells you she wants a relationship first is the same girl who ƒucked the hot guy in the foam cannon party in Cancun on spring break half an hour after meeting him.

If a girl is that into you she'll ƒuck regardless of ASD or having her friends in the room videotaping it at a frat party. All women can be sluts, you just have to be the right guy to bring it out in them, and this happens before you go back to her place. If you have to plead your case cuddling and spooning on the bed or getting the occasional peck on the cheek, you need to go back to square one and start fresh.

How old are you mate?

S*x 2 times a month? 85 yo elderly couples do it more than that.

You might think you're in love with her, but she sure ain't in love with you...stop deluding yourself, she is just enjoying the security in a relationship.

You need to make it clear to her (but not in words, by your actions) that unless she gives the s*x you deserve, you'll find another girl who will.

 

[ThaMac]

Im 25 yeah i know its embarrasing right thats why it makes me mad,
I had a talk with her about this the other day and she tells me that i dont give her the chance because im like always there giving the impression/signs that i want to sex.

She tells me that i need to back off a little bit about the sex...but i mean damn ive lay lowed once for a week but nothin! I already told her with words about the sex now i wonder how could i tell her with actions ?

 

[runner83]

Actions are all that matter.

Don't listen to her words, what do her actions say?

What should you do?

- Start doing other activities so you are out away from her more often. She will start to wonder...

- If when you are out and about, and get a chance with another chick, then take it.

Vows of exclusivity mean nothing in a situation like this, since she is blatantly disrespecting you.

 

[ThaMac]

Really sad part is i get sometimes offers but i let them go because i respect her and i dont want to be called a cheater.

I think maybe i have to get more activities indeed.

But do you think it was ok for me to tell her(with words) i wanted more sex ?

 

[Tiguere]

How long have you 2 been living together?
What % of bills does she pays?
You rent or own?

This girl could be squeezing you financially.

 

[Rethnu]

Wait another 5 years an you'll have sex once a year

 

[Pierce]

Bro, we in the same f*cking situation. This Sh*t is so frustrating.

 

[runner83]

Bro, we in the same f*cking situation. This Sh*t is so frustrating.

Yes, others (myself included) have been there as well.

In my case, I moved in with a girl relatively early in the relationship, and as a result, major differences in our lifestyles became apparent (I am into fitness, she just wanted to watch TV all the time).

And the s*x was starting to dry up as well, she was already using it as a bargaining chip. Plus she was a negative b!tch and dealing with issues in her life.

So I moved back out, and for some time after I was getting messages from her on a regular basis (saying stuff like how she was missed me, she knew there was differences between us but she still liked me).

I could have had her back at this point, but since I had seen the differences I didn't want to get back together and just wanted to move on.

The messages were getting kind of annoying so I deliberately (i.e because I knew it would repel her) sent her an AFC message saying about how I liked her so much, I missed her so much, life was meaningless without her blah blah blah...

And it worked, she sent one back saying about how I needed to move on. And I gladly did and never heard from her again.

Man up boys, and do what's best for you. That is the only thing that will solve your problem.

And I trust you've seen this.

Iron Rule of Tomassi #4

NEVER under any circumstance live with a woman you aren't married to or are not planning to marry in within 6 months.

You are utterly powerless in this situation. NEVER buy a home with a girlfriend, NEVER sign a rental lease with a girlfriend. NEVER agree to move into her home and absolutely NEVER move a woman into your own established living arrangement. I'm adamantly opposed to the "shacking up" dynamic, it is a trap that far too many men allow themselves to fall into. My fervor agianst this isn't based on some moral issue, it it simple pragmatism. If you live with a woman you may as well be married because upon doing so every liability and accountability of marriage is then in effect. You not only lose any freedom of annonymity you commit to, legally, being responsible for the continuation of your living arrangements regardless of how your relationship decays.

I should also emphasize the point that when you commit (and it is a financial committment) to cohabiting with a GF you will notice a marked decrease in her sexual availability and desire, trust me on this. All of that competitive anxiety and it's resulting sexual tension that made your single sex life so great is removed from her shoulders and she can comfortably relax in the knowledge that she is your ONLY source of sexual intimacy. Putting your name on that lease with her (even if it's just your name) is akin to signing an insurance polcy for her - "I the undersigned promise not to ƒuck any woman but this girl for a one year term." She thinks, "if he wasn't serious about me, he wouldn't have signed the lease." Now all of that impetus and energy that made having marathon sex with you an outright necessity is relaxed. She controls the frame and she's got it in writing that it is for at least a year.

Just don't do it. Relationships last best when you spin more plates or at the very least keep each other at arm's distance.


Now, after all that, I don't expect you'll take any of this advice, but for the sake of proving a point please do keep us all updated as to how dynamically your relationship shifts when you do move in with her.

 

[Igetit!]

Im 25 yeah i know its embarrasing right thats why it makes me mad,
I had a talk with her about this the other day and she tells me that i dont give her the chance because im like always there giving the impression/signs that i want to sex.

This just seems like a case of low attraction,it's an easy fix. She's not getting enough chemistry from you.


It's pretty clear because she said two different things. You said that when you approach her for sex that she says no because she's "too "tired"/ "lazy"(bullcrap)or isnt in the mood(bullcrap)".



So according to her,her reason for not wanting sex is because she's tired,lazy,or not in the mood.



I can understand those reasons,they're legit. But if she was telling the truth,then why a few days later when you talked to her about it again,why did she switch her reasons from being tired,lazy,or not in the mood (which ALL have to do with HER),to telling you things that YOU need to do if you want sex?



At first the reason was her being tired,now all of the sudden,it's YOUR FAULT for wanting it too much.




If she's not seeing someone else,and you're 100% certain of that,then look at the way YOU'RE BEHAVING towards her. Think about what she said for a moment....could she have a point?



Is sex on the mind 24/7 with you? She doesn't want a penis with feet,she wants a MAN.




Hate to say this man,but a woman NOT WANTING SEX WITH HER MAN repeatedly is a breakup seed. Inattention,arguiing and fighting,and lack of attraction (on her part) all just water the seed.



This IS fixable,but for some reason,I get the sense you wouldn't take the advice and do what's neccessary to repair it.



You seem to be focused on sex,while the RELATIONSHIP is (possibly) crumbling down around you.

 

[ThaMac]

How long have you 2 been living together?
What % of bills does she pays?
You rent or own?

This girl could be squeezing you financially.

We've been living together for an year . Everybody pay theyre own bills and the rent we split in half

 

[ThaMac]

I must say honestly the more i aint getting it the more i think about sex..

So if 2/3 days passes with no sex i start to get frustrating about the matter and then you know what happens next...

Maybe its my behaviour towards her , but i have my doubts. Because she seems happy with me and she never complains (unless i bring the sex topic or am too flirty with other friends)

You say she maybe want a MAN not a penis with feet.. I dont really understand what you mean with that...Man up as in trying to see other women? or go out often?


I really want to FIX this desperately because this woman is a REAL one and those you dont get often.

We are already living together so i cant go back...

 

[No Girls 4 U]

WOW. Just... wow.

I gotta say, you are doing a GREAT job of giving off the "desperate" vibe. You're so desperate to have someone that you'll even stick around with someone who is CLEARLY no longer interested in you.

True story: prior to me moving out to Cali, I had a girl I was dating on the East Coast. We had a great sex life prior to me moving, but I don't do long-distance relationships, and I told her that. Still, this chick was willing to spend HER money during her spring break from Grad school to come out and see me, just so she could (a) be with me, and (b) have sex with me.

What is my point? I was seeing a girl who would fly across the country to have sex with me. You are with a girl who won't walk across the living room to have sex with you, and COMPLAINS when you try to bring it up.

Think really, REAAAAALLY hard about this one: would a girl who is fawning over you be (a) complaining about having to have sex with you, or (b) start dripping wet at the thought of you being inside her?

Really, really simple stuff, my friend.

And frankly, you deserve better. The problem, however, is not entirely her - like many guys, there are probably some things you may have been doing for the past few months that have slowly started to turn her off.

Luckily, I'm pretty good at helping guys figure out what those things are - check out the link below for more info!

- Harry Wilmington
www.NoGirls4U.com

 

[runner83]

We are already living together so i cant go back...

Complete and utter b/s. I've done it, it didn't work out, I left and never looked back.

Didn't you read any of the earlier advice???

Words are the wrong way to approach it. Stop asking her for s!x if you ever were.

This is what you should do:

- Start doing other activities so you are out away from her more often. She will start to wonder...

- If when you are out and about, and get a chance with another chick, then take it.

She's got you by the balls man.

Only you can decide whether you are strong enough to fix things, instead of continually posting on here asking for advice that has already been given.

 

[manonfire]

tell her that sex is a deal breaker and if she's not down. you'll take your penis elsewhere while she collects dust.

 

[ENIGMA16]

Move out or this relationship is over.

That is what it boils down to.