OK, so here's the deal: I got in this mess with a girl who was involved with another guy, and right now I pretty much have no clue how to go about it. Situation is like this:
- we are (or were? not really sure) kinda close - to be read "I got emotionally attached"; yea I am well aware that was a retarded thing to do - , and at this point I'm not sure I would be able to just go no contact with her all of the sudden with no apparent particular reason; that just seems lame beyond words to me; besides, I don't know if going this way won't hurt any chance I may still have even more;
- chick was VERY into me in the beginning - shortly after we first met she actually made the first move (I was still clueless wtf is going on, since I knew from her FB that she had a bf, and this was the first time I've ever been in a situation like this) and we had some pretty heavy make-out sessions and almost sealed the deal; we didn't because exactly when things were really heating up bad, we got interrupted (it was at night but we were in a public park and some dudes happened to pass nearby - I didn't push things at all, nor that same evening or the following days - and at some point she probably started getting second thoughts, eventually we left for home);
- I had more chances to make a move some time after that, but on those occasions she didn't show any green lights except the fact that she was alone with me at night in various semi-secluded places - probably was expecting me to go at it, but I didn't, because of dumb moral/ethic crap of the "but she has a BF, I shouldn't" kind, and the fact that after almost doing it that night in the park, 2 or 3 days later we had a "talk" about how she is so confused, feels she can't cheat on her bf, even though she likes me a lot, how she still cares about him, and it wouldn't be fair - either to him or to me - to have something with me at the same time, and being the nice guy that I was, I bought that crap and took it literally (it was most likely just her way of telling me that I should take all responsibility on myself and make a move, so she doesn't feel like a slut for cheating on the guy)
- eventually, she slowly started to become distant, rarely initiating contact, suggesting that we go out sometime later in the day and then flaking, stopped the obvious flirting (I think this was right after the bf discussion), and so on; all the signs of fading interest. That happened over a few months time.
So question is, what to do here? To be honest, the signals she gave me in the beginning (even after the "I can't cheat on my bf" episode) were so crystal clear (I can see that now, or probably even then) I almost feel like apologizing to her for being such a monumental chump and not acting on them. I think I should add that the other guy is still very much in the picture.
- we are (or were? not really sure) kinda close - to be read "I got emotionally attached"; yea I am well aware that was a retarded thing to do - , and at this point I'm not sure I would be able to just go no contact with her all of the sudden with no apparent particular reason; that just seems lame beyond words to me; besides, I don't know if going this way won't hurt any chance I may still have even more;
- chick was VERY into me in the beginning - shortly after we first met she actually made the first move (I was still clueless wtf is going on, since I knew from her FB that she had a bf, and this was the first time I've ever been in a situation like this) and we had some pretty heavy make-out sessions and almost sealed the deal; we didn't because exactly when things were really heating up bad, we got interrupted (it was at night but we were in a public park and some dudes happened to pass nearby - I didn't push things at all, nor that same evening or the following days - and at some point she probably started getting second thoughts, eventually we left for home);
- I had more chances to make a move some time after that, but on those occasions she didn't show any green lights except the fact that she was alone with me at night in various semi-secluded places - probably was expecting me to go at it, but I didn't, because of dumb moral/ethic crap of the "but she has a BF, I shouldn't" kind, and the fact that after almost doing it that night in the park, 2 or 3 days later we had a "talk" about how she is so confused, feels she can't cheat on her bf, even though she likes me a lot, how she still cares about him, and it wouldn't be fair - either to him or to me - to have something with me at the same time, and being the nice guy that I was, I bought that crap and took it literally (it was most likely just her way of telling me that I should take all responsibility on myself and make a move, so she doesn't feel like a slut for cheating on the guy)
- eventually, she slowly started to become distant, rarely initiating contact, suggesting that we go out sometime later in the day and then flaking, stopped the obvious flirting (I think this was right after the bf discussion), and so on; all the signs of fading interest. That happened over a few months time.
So question is, what to do here? To be honest, the signals she gave me in the beginning (even after the "I can't cheat on my bf" episode) were so crystal clear (I can see that now, or probably even then) I almost feel like apologizing to her for being such a monumental chump and not acting on them. I think I should add that the other guy is still very much in the picture.
. Besides, from what I've seen, if I think about it more, the bf guy is a weirdo (I actually got to meet him and shake hands, twice, thanks to her 