h2o
Banned
Ok, I know I have less than a 100 posts, and I'm by no means a DJ yet. Although, I do have a quick story / advice I'd like to share. It's probably already been said, which is why I'm choosing to put it in "Anything Else," since it's by no means original enough for "Tips." The reason I chose to post it is because it's not completely worthless; I was surprised to hear it from my mother (though probably the first time I'd listened). So, this is the way some women really do feel. I mean, even though I've read a ton of stuff of this site, listening to my mom tell me it really ingrains it in my mind even further ... so, I guess what I'm saying is that even though this is old stuff, it probably won't hurt you to hear it again.
I was sitting in the car with my mother today, and she was quite upset with a few things. We have conversations like this one (the one I'm about to summarize) every now and then. She is usually upset with my father and my brother for being too nice, not balancing their lives, and getting 'walked over.'
What she told me was basically what this forum teaches, though this forum is geared mostly towards our interactions with women only. My dad and brother are sometimes too nice. For example, she tells me that at times if they are talking to someone, they may keep doing so even if they have to leave and be somewhere. They help others too much, and those people don't necessarily do much in return.
She tells me that you should be nice to friends and family, but only polite and assertive with everyone else. That will save you a lot of time and you won't waste others' time either by keeping your interactions straight to the point. Be blunt with people, and say what is on your mind. Don't waste time beating around the bush, and people will respect you more for that.
Don't be a workaholic. Life is too short to be working all the time. This means that if you work 9-5, don't create work for yourself after those hours. Balance your life, because that is the only way you can truly enjoy it and live life. You don't want to be 70 and look back at all the times you wasted.
When it comes to women, set a barrier. Don't reveal every detail about your life. Especially when it comes to family, there are some things that are meant to stay between you and your family. If you tell her everything your woman will crawl all over you. (Remember, my mom told me this) I guess not revealing everything will also allow you to maintain that bit of 'mystery' about yourself.
Set aside quality time to spend with your family, and quality time to spend with your girlfriend/wife. For instance, when my brother is at my parents' house and his girlfriend calls he always picks up (and talks for at least 20 minutes each time). She calls him like 4-5 times in only a few hours, and it pisses my mom off that he can't leave her alone for only a few hours and focus on only being with family. She (gf) will respect you more if you set aside quality time. This is very similar to what is taught here. You shouldn't give up all your time to the girl or she will have control; you shouldn't let a girl control you. My mom says she knows guys that are literally enslaved by their wives/women (we know these guys as afcs) ... and it's not good because they spend all day with them and pledge to them but may not 'mentally' be there with their wives; their minds will drift, they won't listen, etc. It is much better to balance and spend less time, if it is quality time.
My brother has unfortunately let his girlfriend 'crawl all over' him. One time, my mom offered him some dessert, and he declined...later, I overheard them arguing, and my brother said something along the lines of his girlfriend wants him to stay lean, so he watches what he eats. Damn. I don't believe my brother is like that. Sure he has what most of you would rate an hb9-10 gf, but he should stay in control. That's the only way for a healthy relationship.
I've never really told my brother anything about it, mainly because I think it would be awkward, and since I don't have a gf at the moment, I don't think he would take me seriously (he is 8 years older too).
She tells me nice guys get walked over and encourages me to not be nice. Never let women walk over or take advantage of you, don't even let it happen once. Be straight forward with women.
Like I mentioned before, my mom told me all this. She is always encouraging me to approach and meet women. Funny thing is, until I found this site, I would never take her advice seriously or make any effort to apply it. You can learn a lot from your parents, so take a few minutes to listen. I wish I'd listened to her long ago. Now that I've found this site I understand how valuable her advice has been all along.
I was sitting in the car with my mother today, and she was quite upset with a few things. We have conversations like this one (the one I'm about to summarize) every now and then. She is usually upset with my father and my brother for being too nice, not balancing their lives, and getting 'walked over.'
What she told me was basically what this forum teaches, though this forum is geared mostly towards our interactions with women only. My dad and brother are sometimes too nice. For example, she tells me that at times if they are talking to someone, they may keep doing so even if they have to leave and be somewhere. They help others too much, and those people don't necessarily do much in return.
She tells me that you should be nice to friends and family, but only polite and assertive with everyone else. That will save you a lot of time and you won't waste others' time either by keeping your interactions straight to the point. Be blunt with people, and say what is on your mind. Don't waste time beating around the bush, and people will respect you more for that.
Don't be a workaholic. Life is too short to be working all the time. This means that if you work 9-5, don't create work for yourself after those hours. Balance your life, because that is the only way you can truly enjoy it and live life. You don't want to be 70 and look back at all the times you wasted.
When it comes to women, set a barrier. Don't reveal every detail about your life. Especially when it comes to family, there are some things that are meant to stay between you and your family. If you tell her everything your woman will crawl all over you. (Remember, my mom told me this) I guess not revealing everything will also allow you to maintain that bit of 'mystery' about yourself.
Set aside quality time to spend with your family, and quality time to spend with your girlfriend/wife. For instance, when my brother is at my parents' house and his girlfriend calls he always picks up (and talks for at least 20 minutes each time). She calls him like 4-5 times in only a few hours, and it pisses my mom off that he can't leave her alone for only a few hours and focus on only being with family. She (gf) will respect you more if you set aside quality time. This is very similar to what is taught here. You shouldn't give up all your time to the girl or she will have control; you shouldn't let a girl control you. My mom says she knows guys that are literally enslaved by their wives/women (we know these guys as afcs) ... and it's not good because they spend all day with them and pledge to them but may not 'mentally' be there with their wives; their minds will drift, they won't listen, etc. It is much better to balance and spend less time, if it is quality time.
My brother has unfortunately let his girlfriend 'crawl all over' him. One time, my mom offered him some dessert, and he declined...later, I overheard them arguing, and my brother said something along the lines of his girlfriend wants him to stay lean, so he watches what he eats. Damn. I don't believe my brother is like that. Sure he has what most of you would rate an hb9-10 gf, but he should stay in control. That's the only way for a healthy relationship.
I've never really told my brother anything about it, mainly because I think it would be awkward, and since I don't have a gf at the moment, I don't think he would take me seriously (he is 8 years older too).
She tells me nice guys get walked over and encourages me to not be nice. Never let women walk over or take advantage of you, don't even let it happen once. Be straight forward with women.
Like I mentioned before, my mom told me all this. She is always encouraging me to approach and meet women. Funny thing is, until I found this site, I would never take her advice seriously or make any effort to apply it. You can learn a lot from your parents, so take a few minutes to listen. I wish I'd listened to her long ago. Now that I've found this site I understand how valuable her advice has been all along.
