Social in high school?

[DJ_Matthew]

Hey guys, I just started school and I'm already having a bit of a hard time...

First of all, my school isn't that big. For the last 2 years I've always been with the same group of guys. I would usually stand around, not say much and act cool. They've started smoking weed and I just want cut loose from them (I don't want to talk about drugs and what happens when your stoned). I don't have many other friends and the other guys just bug me (I'm the guy who makes fun of others or does stupid things, most of the time, to please my so called friends). I also have some nice friends, but they're a lot less popular than me. It drives me crazy. It's just in school were I feel like this outcast/a bit reject.

It's one of the reasons, I have trouble initing conversations with women. However, I don't let it stop me and I, most of the time, make the approach.

So my question is: How do I fit in and feel more confertable with women and everyone else?

Thanks

 

[War Against Betaism]

You can hang around with a bunch of people that do drugs and not do them you know. My circle of friends right now do ecstasy and weed, and me and my closest friend right now don't do those things, yet we're the more respected in our crew. Now if there are other things that make you want to cut loose with them and you REALLY want to make new friends, the only way to do that is to become an outgoing person. Just be very open. Now you mentioned you're one of those guys that makes fun of other guys and does stupid things, I can already picture what you're like right now in my head. I suggest you should stop doing that, I thought I was being an outgoing person like that but it made people dislike me. I realized that you don't have to do those things in order for people to like you; as long as you're a chill person then people will accept you. If people aren't your enemy after the time you get to know someone, then they're your friend.

 

[moneybanks24]

When you make fun of others and don't go over the top its funny. But when you take it too far it makes you look insecure. And i agree with waragainst, just because they smoke weed doesn't mean they're bad kids. But i def. feel you and I'm in the same boat, I'm looking to branch out as well. I'm a senior and its a little tough. How old are you?

 

[DJ_Matthew]

Yeah, I don't make fun of others as much now. Some of my friends who do drugs are chill guys, but others are annoying. It's hard for me too, I'm in 10th grade, 15 years old. There's like 120 students in my grade... I already know everyone that why it's harder to expand my social circle.

 

[Triple T]

Just talk to everyone. Be friendly, flirt with the chicks, talk with the dudes about sports/chicks or whatever interest you share with them.

It might be wierd at first but after awhile people will accept the new you.
You'll be the guy that is everyone's friend, the guy that is welcome in any circle of friends. People will look up to you my friend.

 

[BlakeW5]

You remind me of the old me. Just talk to everyone and be the fun-loving guy. When I say everyone, I mean everyone not just the popular kids or whatever. You'll be surprised how open most people are to conversation, and who knows you could just make someones day better.

I went from the "smart guy" to the popular guy, class president, and guy who was friends with all the circles in only two months. The best part is once you start making new friends your progress snowballs. The more people that like you the more others want to get to know you. If you had told me back then about the changes I would make and the new person I would become I wouldn't have believed you. Truthfully, I didn't really, I just lost my "social fears" and started to act like who I was inside. The most shocking part was that women started hitting on me. Honestly it was the first time in my life that I experienced something like that with no real effort on my part.

I went to a small school too (100 in my class) and already knew everyone and definately had a stereotype in the eyes of others (the smart guy). It really is easy though, you just have to be willing to put yourself out there.

 

[intrextrovert]

Small ass schools represent.

Yeah dude, just talk to people, but don't be annoying. Be outgoing, but don't intrude on other people's business if they don't invite you. Be assertive, don't give into peer pressure (not an anti-drug or w/e thing, I personally smoke sometimes, but only do things if YOU want to)

Since you know everyone, it doesn't stretch much to talk to everyone. If you need to start off, try saying hi to people you walk by in the halls. I remember one day last year I tried that to help me out and got amazingly friendly responses.