Social circle game guys aren't getting laid as much as you think.

[Jesse Pinkman]

So for the past few months, a good chunk of 2023 and 2024, I had the chance to hang out with guys that have big social circles full of girls and guys. Due to my location, this also included college frat guys because in Miami, they can somehow afford to live in the fancier spots off campus. If there one takeaway I have had, it is that social circle game dudes or dudes who rely on a social circle are not getting laid nearly that much, some at all. I am also talking about club promoters here.

Its a mirage.

If there is one thing I am finding, it is a mirage. You may see a promoter taking selfies with chicks who are happy in IG photos but they rarely sleep with these girls. A lot of times, these girls just use the promoter for drinks and free stuff but then they run after that. Even when I have had college kids move into my building, I have noticed this.

Lately, a frat moved in on my floor, two frats. Their parties they throw, despite being rich frat guys, are mostly guys. The girls are usually in relationships. You see them at the pool and the ratios are wack, like 2 girls to 8 guys or something.

The reality of sex in these social circles.

What happens is that most of the times, girls get suspicious if a guy is single and they try to lock him down. Social circles are prime for LTRs and a wife but usually bad for getting laid. The reason for this is because you do not want to get a reputation. The other reason is because you are constantly doing BS activities like group dinners, brunches, and partying. Given that you are this tied down, time is taken away from you for getting girls.

Sex is shunned in a good chunk of these circles because if you hook up in that circle, the rumor is "oh they hooked up" and if you hook up too much, it becomes "oh he just sleeps around icky!".

In a way, you get limited in your circle as most women will not be okay with a guy in their vicinity casually sleeping around. This is why most social circles lead to guys being hitched and tied down.

These guys have to rely on bringing in outside girls.

This means throwing parties and events in the hope that girls come and bring their friends and they can prey on their friends. This is ultimately what social circle is.

How about Michael Sartain and Dan Bilzerian and such?

So for one, Sartain actually pushes cold approach in his programs now. The other thing is that what these guys do is Status Game, NOT social circle game. Status game means they have high status in a venue or access to high status and they call a bunch of random girls along, some of those random girls will sleep with them. They are not into this massive social circle with these girls, the girls just loosely know some of the same people they know at best but it is the status itself with something major that gets girls to come.

Example is knowing a guy with a nice yacth or knowing the club owner personally. This is status game as you are not seeing the same people repeatedly, just leveraging a powerful relationship.

 

[BackInTheGame78]

Then you have the guy who comes along and could care less about any of this nonsense and fvcks whoever he wants and the guys all envy him and the girls claim they hate him but secretly sleep with him when nobody is watching.

Never believe what you are seeing during the daytime is actually what is going on behind the scenes during the nighttime.

You would be surprised how many times a woman goes to a party/after hours party and gets fvcked by a dude there who isn't the boyfriend that she came with who is blissfully ignorant downstairs hanging out while she is getting railed elsewhere in the place. Or who "leaves early" for some reason(not feeling good, headache, tired, etc) but meets up with another dude while her boyfriend stays at the party.

I saw it all every night from the cat bird perch as a house club DJ for a decade. I was at many of those parties. Everyone talked to me. I had dirt on just about everyone, because they all wanted to talk to me and told me stuff about the other people who they didn't like. Then the other person would come and tell me the dirt on that person. It was kinda crazy actually. Essentially at these events you are the closest thing to a celebrity that you'll get without a real celebrity being there.

Like Travolta's character in Swordfish on Houdini...women are masters of misdirection.

 

[SW15]

The reality of sex in these social circles.

What happens is that most of the times, girls get suspicious if a guy is single and they try to lock him down. Social circles are prime for LTRs and a wife but usually bad for getting laid. The reason for this is because you do not want to get a reputation. The other reason is because you are constantly doing BS activities like group dinners, brunches, and partying. Given that you are this tied down, time is taken away from you for getting girls.

Sex is shunned in a good chunk of these circles because if you hook up in that circle, the rumor is "oh they hooked up" and if you hook up too much, it becomes "oh he just sleeps around icky!".

In a way, you get limited in your circle as most women will not be okay with a guy in their vicinity casually sleeping around. This is why most social circles lead to guys being hitched and tied down.

This is mostly accurate on reality of sex in social circle.

I agree that social circles are a better path for finding an LTR and a wife.

In general, social circle interactions are better options in the shorter to medium to for finding a girlfriend. If you're looking for an extended relationship (1-5 years or more), your best bet for getting that with the least amount of grief and frustration is through a social circle, especially if you are not a 90th percentile + type guy ('Chad') . You won't have to do as many approaches in either non-bar venues or nightlife venues or take as many rejections. You won't have a miserable time on swipe apps, which is common for the middle of the bell curve male.

Most males with social circles are trying to find a LTR (eventually a wife) for frequent sex. These aren't guys who care that much about their lifetime notch count. They want a stable LTR with decent amounts of sex. They are simply looking to settle down and exit the phase of life where they are actively seeking new sex partners. This isn't the kind of guy who will seek out forums like SoSuave. This is a guy who is more common than a guy seeking more casual sex.

The men who don't have social circle options are the ones who end up approaching strangers, sending DMs, and swiping on apps.

I agree that women in social circle would react less positively to a guy in the circle having casual sex within the circle.

The only point I disagree on is women getting suspicious on single guys in a circle. I didn't see that happening in my circles but perhaps I haven't seen or didn't know enough.

These guys have to rely on bringing in outside girls.

This means throwing parties and events in the hope that girls come and bring their friends and they can prey on their friends. This is ultimately what social circle is.

This happens but is a form of a weaker social circle game.

 

[The Duke]

I was part of a social circle for several years that lived and hung out at a large apartment complex with restaurants, bars, shops within walking distance. Some of the guys got no pu$$y out of the group. There were two guys that tried to control the market. They feared any outside males that might be a threat to their women, and were really insecure and beta bully's at the end of the day. I don't think they got much action but did on occasion. One ended up committing suicide. He was broke, depressed, and hung himself off his 3rd floor apartment balcony so everyone could see.

I went out with two of the women but never ended up having sex. Everyone knew everybody's business. I was too dangerous for them, they were too boring for me. Never was my deal. But I did enjoy getting their girls liquored up and taking them to the country bar to dance! The guys never joined our fun.

 

[plumber]

discretion.

the guys that are in the group or other than women, do better with the women.

 

[AmsterdamAssassin]

If there is one thing I am finding, it is a mirage. You may see a promoter taking selfies with chicks who are happy in IG photos but they rarely sleep with these girls. A lot of times, these girls just use the promoter for drinks and free stuff but then they run after that. Even when I have had college kids move into my building, I have noticed this.

 

[BPH]

How about Michael Sartain and Dan Bilzerian and such?.

View attachment 13096

I don't know enough about Sartain, but these kinda go hand-in-hand...

Bilzerian lies about the source of his money, seeing as he's the son of a fraudster (who also is now in charge of handling his money), and is almost surely paying those women to be around him to maintain his image. He's renting his home, his personal expenses are listed as business expenses, and there's a lot of contention about his true military background.

Sartain might not have the same shady background (he might, I just haven't looked too deep), but he's a decent-looking guy who's (appearing) rich...so of course he has women.

I don't think these guys are good examples of "social circle" game. They're just "rich" with a public image.

 

[Hamurabimbi]

In SC Women will make it clear whom they are interested in. To the point where there will be no ambiguity.

 

[sharkfinale]

I don't know enough about Sartain

I'm just connecting dots and throwing in some guesses, with what he has said publicly.

He was DJ at strip club. I am assuming he later was a club promoter (after military) and leveled up to bring girls to bikini competitions. Somewhere along the way met guys likes of Bilzerian and Tai Lopez. Kind of zeroed in on red-pill as way to milk money of some chumps. Roped in Rollo, who also would like a good payout after couple of decades in RP, to gain credibility and foothold. Most of the girls that go to his show are OF girls, strippers, etc. Sartain built persona around his promoter background and selling his stuff.

 

[Solomon]

So for the past few months, a good chunk of 2023 and 2024, I had the chance to hang out with guys that have big social circles full of girls and guys. Due to my location, this also included college frat guys because in Miami, they can somehow afford to live in the fancier spots off campus. If there one takeaway I have had, it is that social circle game dudes or dudes who rely on a social circle are not getting laid nearly that much, some at all. I am also talking about club promoters here.

Its a mirage.

If there is one thing I am finding, it is a mirage. You may see a promoter taking selfies with chicks who are happy in IG photos but they rarely sleep with these girls. A lot of times, these girls just use the promoter for drinks and free stuff but then they run after that. Even when I have had college kids move into my building, I have noticed this.

Lately, a frat moved in on my floor, two frats. Their parties they throw, despite being rich frat guys, are mostly guys. The girls are usually in relationships. You see them at the pool and the ratios are wack, like 2 girls to 8 guys or something.

The reality of sex in these social circles.

What happens is that most of the times, girls get suspicious if a guy is single and they try to lock him down. Social circles are prime for LTRs and a wife but usually bad for getting laid. The reason for this is because you do not want to get a reputation. The other reason is because you are constantly doing BS activities like group dinners, brunches, and partying. Given that you are this tied down, time is taken away from you for getting girls.

Sex is shunned in a good chunk of these circles because if you hook up in that circle, the rumor is "oh they hooked up" and if you hook up too much, it becomes "oh he just sleeps around icky!".

In a way, you get limited in your circle as most women will not be okay with a guy in their vicinity casually sleeping around. This is why most social circles lead to guys being hitched and tied down.

These guys have to rely on bringing in outside girls.

This means throwing parties and events in the hope that girls come and bring their friends and they can prey on their friends. This is ultimately what social circle is.

How about Michael Sartain and Dan Bilzerian and such?

So for one, Sartain actually pushes cold approach in his programs now. The other thing is that what these guys do is Status Game, NOT social circle game. Status game means they have high status in a venue or access to high status and they call a bunch of random girls along, some of those random girls will sleep with them. They are not into this massive social circle with these girls, the girls just loosely know some of the same people they know at best but it is the status itself with something major that gets girls to come.

Example is knowing a guy with a nice yacth or knowing the club owner personally. This is status game as you are not seeing the same people repeatedly, just leveraging a powerful relationship.

This is spot on but...

Then you have the guy who comes along and could care less about any of this nonsense and fvcks whoever he wants and the guys all envy him and the girls claim they hate him but secretly sleep with him when nobody is watching.

Never believe what you are seeing during the daytime is actually what is going on behind the scenes during the nighttime.

You would be surprised how many times a woman goes to a party/after hours party and gets fvcked by a dude there who isn't the boyfriend that she came with who is blissfully ignorant downstairs hanging out while she is getting railed elsewhere in the place. Or who "leaves early" for some reason(not feeling good, headache, tired, etc) but meets up with another dude while her boyfriend stays at the party.

I saw it all every night from the cat bird perch for a decade. Like Travolta's character in Swordfish on Houdini...women are masters of misdirection.

Yup this happens to. It's not a secret in the past I talked about social circles a lot in a positive light but there is a dark side to it as well. Most social circles if they are healthy people respect each other's boundaries. However, I was part of a social circle where you had guys that had girlfriends and would sleep with other women and pass them around. These girls were not part of the social circle per se but "visitors" what happens is some guys are single they bring a girl in, the girl might get ran through, pass around and she gets replaced, rinse and repeat.

It's not something openly talked about but it's on the hush hush, in college this is actually more common but as you get older people tend to be more discreet about these things or try to be

 

[Manure Spherian]

Michael Sartain

Another middle-aged, graying, and frantic red piller and Avenger of Nerds late to the party (think Rollo, Myron Gaines, Richard Cooper, etc.).

 

[Vanderdonck]

Sex is shunned in a good chunk of these circles because if you hook up in that circle, the rumor is "oh they hooked up" and if you hook up too much, it becomes "oh he just sleeps around icky!".

In a way, you get limited in your circle as most women will not be okay with a guy in their vicinity casually sleeping around.

This is projecting narratives and frame failure. Most women will be more than okay with a player in their circle. If you think you will be shunned you've already lost the game.

I swear 99% of problems on sosuave would disappear if guys would just stop worrying about what people think.

 

[Manure Spherian]

This is projecting narratives and frame failure. Most women will be more than okay with a player in their circle. If you think you will be shunned you've already lost the game.

Back in the late 90s and early 2000s, social circles consisted of men and women who were all screwing one another, literally and figuratively.

Besides that, most normal men get women by being sociable and spending time with people or using dating apps without too much female analysis.

 

[SW15]

Let's remember that social circle facilitated relationships have been declining since the early 1990s. Tech-based dating has taken over most of its market share for facilitating introductions.

 

[CornbreadFed]

Social circles are for activities and engagement not hooking up.

 

[BillyPilgrim]

Social circles are for activities and engagement not hooking up.

Breaking cornbread.

 

[Divorced w 3]

I echo that when nobody is watching, all the women’s posturing in the friend group is out the window. You can imagine that I am Persona Non Grata in my former marital social circle ; my instagram messages from the single moms there tell a different story. The office social circle is the same way ; the group you grew up with when it’s late and your buddy’s sister sees you getting attention when you’re out and she snugs up on the couch (in front of her boyfriend), they’ll dismiss it all but never forget communication is 70%+ not verbal

 

[Divorced w 3]

I was part of a social circle for several years that lived and hung out at a large apartment complex with restaurants, bars, shops within walking distance. Some of the guys got no pu$$y out of the group. There were two guys that tried to control the market. They feared any outside males that might be a threat to their women, and were really insecure and beta bully's at the end of the day. I don't think they got much action but did on occasion. One ended up committing suicide. He was broke, depressed, and hung himself off his 3rd floor apartment balcony so everyone could see.

I went out with two of the women but never ended up having sex. Everyone knew everybody's business. I was too dangerous for them, they were too boring for me. Never was my deal. But I did enjoy getting their girls liquored up and taking them to the country bar to dance! The guys never joined our fun.

^^Lest we forget, The Don Juan isn’t interested in screwing every chick that smiles at him

 

[Gamisch]

Social circle is the new holy grail , a fairytale, because most people won't be able to sustain such a circle. Especially the "4 men 4 women all equally important " type.

Women hate each other. Men resource guard such a circle. Still it might not be a bad idea to be able to create circles of your own where you are the "moderator " and decide who gets to stay and go. Some ideas;

Start a fitness group
Organise things such as parties
Or more specifically: parties aimed at specific niches with specific themes
Teach what you're skilled at

Girls just wanna fun. Provide fun. Become someone.

 

[Manure Spherian]

Social circles are for activities and engagement not hooking up.

Does that explain the social circles I grew up around in which those part of them were screwing each other? Pretty much all sexual dynamics around my way in my younger years were squares having girlfriends or no one or the kewl people taking turns “dating” screwing one another.

Perhaps dynamics have changed.