So who goes up to a girl he likes and starts talking to her?

Ease

Master Don Juan
Joined
Jul 23, 2009
Messages
1,325
Reaction score
51
The number 1 most important principle to get girls is to talk to new ones. To actively initiate the conversation with someone you don't know. This is every man's responsibility.

How many can actually say that they are able to go up and start a conversation with a girl with devilish intentions, on a 'regular' basis?

What is your style?

During the day? During the night?

Can you do it while going about regular business? Do you go out with the intention to hit up girls during the day?

At a bar? At a club? Make a move on a dance floor?

How often can you manage to approach, how often do you pus-yo out and chump?

Do you wait for a sign and eye contact?

How often does it work?


And what would you say?


Talk about it, tell us about it. Share tips trick stories and inspiration. Real recognise real on this issue, this is about real everyday events, instead of the usual nonsense on this board. Lets learn from eachother!
 

PokerStar

Master Don Juan
Joined
Jan 28, 2009
Messages
635
Reaction score
63
Location
Location
Not all the time but most of the time I open up with a question that usually involves their opinion.

and you know how women just love to talk.

If they respond with a single answer, i probe just a little deeper.

If they respnd with a long answer, then you know you can carry out the conversation however you like.
 

bigneil

Banned
Joined
Oct 20, 2006
Messages
8,377
Reaction score
2,696
Location
Texas
I look for buying signs first. If she holds eye contact and then smiles, you have one minute to get over there. Doesn't matter what you say but how confident you appear saying it. Otherwise without buying signs, I don't cold-call.
 

JLW

Senior Don Juan
Joined
Nov 19, 2005
Messages
375
Reaction score
7
bigneil said:
I look for buying signs first. If she holds eye contact and then smiles, you have one minute to get over there. Doesn't matter what you say but how confident you appear saying it. Otherwise without buying signs, I don't cold-call.
I'm the same way.

There have been times when I have tried to approach girls who gave absolutely no indicator of interest. I have had success a few times, but I find myself having a way better conversation if the girl gives me a sign that she is interested.
 

Furyguy

Senior Don Juan
Joined
Jun 14, 2008
Messages
467
Reaction score
19
Location
A better place, a better time.
I like to approach and just talk about random nonsense. There's a huge variety of subjects you can have great success with if you speak like a normal yet passionate person. Tell them something interesting that they don't know and why it's a big deal. Just don't talk about anything tooooo serious.

I used to do this a lot. Then, I got a girlfriend, and stopped because I didn't want to be successful with other women as that might complicate things. I very recently became single and must now go back to doing this again.

I'm usually pretty blunt. See how long you can get them to talk about a topic of your choosing before they make it obvious they want you to leave or ask why the **** you're talking to them. It's like playing that game where someone picks a random name out of the phone book for you and you have to try to keep them on the phone for as long as possible to win. In this case, it doesn't really matter what you say or what you talk about, just how you present yourself and what kind of an impression you make. A close of any kind is entirely optional, if either one of you is not feeling it just say bye and leave.

In fact, this could almost be a bootcamp-esque challenge of some kind on the board: "Pick a chick you like and see how long you can get her to talk you about a random topic before she tries to get you to leave or asks why the **** you're talking to her."
 

Ease

Master Don Juan
Joined
Jul 23, 2009
Messages
1,325
Reaction score
51
Furyguy said:
I like to approach and just talk about random nonsense. There's a huge variety of subjects you can have great success with if you speak like a normal yet passionate person. Tell them something interesting that they don't know and why it's a big deal. Just don't talk about anything tooooo serious.

I used to do this a lot. Then, I got a girlfriend, and stopped because I didn't want to be successful with other women as that might complicate things. I very recently became single and must now go back to doing this again.

I'm usually pretty blunt. See how long you can get them to talk about a topic of your choosing before they make it obvious they want you to leave or ask why the **** you're talking to them. It's like playing that game where someone picks a random name out of the phone book for you and you have to try to keep them on the phone for as long as possible to win. In this case, it doesn't really matter what you say or what you talk about, just how you present yourself and what kind of an impression you make. A close of any kind is entirely optional, if either one of you is not feeling it just say bye and leave.

In fact, this could almost be a bootcamp-esque challenge of some kind on the board: "Pick a chick you like and see how long you can get her to talk you about a random topic before she tries to get you to leave or asks why the **** you're talking to her."
I dont know about that but that sounds like a funny game. Pick a random number and keep them on the fone for longest, going to try this.
 

allbeef

Banned
Joined
Jan 17, 2011
Messages
94
Reaction score
1
That is hard to do. Literally. I get hard when I see a chick that I like. First thing that comes to mind is to get to my car and jerk it a bit. Lately I have been hanging in there and looking her way.

Eye contact is the key. If she looks your way and maintains contact for more then a second that means she wants more of you. That is why I love Starbucks. I make eye contact before they get their coffee. I then hand the coffee to them. It works. It is a great opener. I am hitting two Starbucks during work tomorrow. I am sure I will get a number or two. The idea is to know who is open to you. Don't push your luck on the ones who don't seem open.

Remember, getting a little hard is a good thing. Just don't beat it in public!
 

sceptre

Don Juan
Joined
Dec 29, 2010
Messages
10
Reaction score
0
It's my opinion that you should approach whomever you find attractive, regardless of whether she looks at you, smiles, winks, whatever. Almost all attractive girls will at least be polite. She might not want to have a conversation with you, but she will let you down very nicely.

Of course, there are girls who have no manners and should remove themselves from society, but they are pretty rare. And yet, it's a risk we all have to take when we cold approach.

But to get to the point, I've been chickening out a lot lately. I've been making unacceptable excuses. It feels good to admit it, though. Thanks for starting this thread. I'll use it as motivation.
 

betterthandead

Senior Don Juan
Joined
Sep 2, 2007
Messages
297
Reaction score
7
I'd rather have the girl approach me than the other way around going up to the girl like a beggar. Girls who get approached a lot (aka. attractive) tend to do the picking. Girls that are average or below average wait for the guy. I have no need for average/below average looking girls. They don't stir anything for me.

Of course after she does approach me and we go through the dating rituals, I become the beggar.
 

bigneil

Banned
Joined
Oct 20, 2006
Messages
8,377
Reaction score
2,696
Location
Texas
Once you start talking, just read the body language:

1) She touches you for any reason (though some girls are just touchy-feely with everyone).
2) She crosses the far leg over the near leg and toward you.
3) She rubs her arms.
4) She is touching her face.
5) Showing a lot of teeth.
6) Eyebrow lift (this one can escape you as it looks like they might be implying they think you are strange, but it's a good sign).
7) Plays with her hair.
8) If you are close enough to see if their pupils get bigger or smaller, bigger is good (i.e. "giving you the eye"), smaller is bad (i.e. "a dirty look").

Tips:

*Ask her name, but don't tell her yours. If she asks yours that's good.
*Don't extend your hand to a girl first!! If they like you they will extend their hand.

If it's going well, go for the cheek-kiss after talking to them. If they like you they will make it obvious. Only then do I ask to contact them.
 

Masculinity

Master Don Juan
Joined
Mar 6, 2009
Messages
1,911
Reaction score
544
Age
35
bigneil said:
Once you start talking, just read the body language:

1) She touches you for any reason (though some girls are just touchy-feely with everyone).
2) She crosses the far leg over the near leg and toward you.
3) She rubs her arms.
4) She is touching her face.
5) Showing a lot of teeth.
6) Eyebrow lift (this one can escape you as it looks like they might be implying they think you are strange, but it's a good sign).
7) Plays with her hair.
8) If you are close enough to see if their pupils get bigger or smaller, bigger is good (i.e. "giving you the eye"), smaller is bad (i.e. "a dirty look").

Tips:

*Ask her name, but don't tell her yours. If she asks yours that's good.
*Don't extend your hand to a girl first!! If they like you they will extend their hand.

If it's going well, go for the cheek-kiss after talking to them. If they like you they will make it obvious. Only then do I ask to contact them.
Good stuff! :up:
 

Ease

Master Don Juan
Joined
Jul 23, 2009
Messages
1,325
Reaction score
51
I'd rather have the girl approach me than the other way around going up to the girl like a beggar. Girls who get approached a lot (aka. attractive) tend to do the picking. Girls that are average or below average wait for the guy. I have no need for average/below average looking girls. They don't stir anything for me.

Of course after she does approach me and we go through the dating rituals, I become the beggar.
I hope this troll jokes because its rubbish. All girls wait for the guy, and waiting to get approached is not a good strategy.

I like those guys who can just talk to anyone and everyone and start conversations left and right. You need to put yourself into situations where things can happen. Too often we all wait for things to happen by themselves. That's the problem with looking for signs before approaching. It's too easy to wait for a strong sign, and being unsure of whether she was looking or not. It's too easy to pusy out of.
 

SharinganUser

Master Don Juan
Joined
Oct 1, 2006
Messages
1,777
Reaction score
50
Furyguy said:
I like to approach and just talk about random nonsense. There's a huge variety of subjects you can have great success with if you speak like a normal yet passionate person. Tell them something interesting that they don't know and why it's a big deal. Just don't talk about anything tooooo serious.

I used to do this a lot. Then, I got a girlfriend, and stopped because I didn't want to be successful with other women as that might complicate things. I very recently became single and must now go back to doing this again.

I'm usually pretty blunt. See how long you can get them to talk about a topic of your choosing before they make it obvious they want you to leave or ask why the **** you're talking to them. It's like playing that game where someone picks a random name out of the phone book for you and you have to try to keep them on the phone for as long as possible to win. In this case, it doesn't really matter what you say or what you talk about, just how you present yourself and what kind of an impression you make. A close of any kind is entirely optional, if either one of you is not feeling it just say bye and leave.

In fact, this could almost be a bootcamp-esque challenge of some kind on the board: "Pick a chick you like and see how long you can get her to talk you about a random topic before she tries to get you to leave or asks why the **** you're talking to her."

Are you Mr. ShakeHandsMan from Bonzai?
 

AAAgent

Master Don Juan
Joined
Dec 10, 2008
Messages
2,648
Reaction score
317
Last night-----

first time ever talking up a waitress. Was kinda pissed that i didn't close but i got her name and found out what days she works. I would have number closed if it wasn't awkward but not that i think back hard about it....its going to be weird a lot of times since if you don't get the number that night you probably won't see them ever again.

I was waiting outside to catch her on her way out since it looked like her shift was ending. I was right, but she left so quick i couldn't catch her (i was standing outside and she came out turned the corner and sped out of there). I walked back in and started playing pong again with my friends and she somehow ends up coming back in because she forgot a jacket. I wasn't giving up this opportunity so i stood right infront of the door in the lobby.

was talking on the phone to my boy when i see the girl coming i quickly put it down..

AAA: Hey i'm glad i got to catch you on the way out (smiling).
waitress: Hey, thanks a lot for tonight. Hope you guys had a good time (i think she said this but i forget what she said after thanks for tonight. Lets pretend it was that but she did say something).

We make eye contact and she stops quickly.

AAA: yeah no problem. I never got to get your name tonight.
Waitress: my name is HB8.
AAA: Nice to meet you HB8. (i thought i introduced myself here but i didn't) So how often do you work here?
Waitress: I work here mostly Friday's, *Saturdays, *Mondays, and *Tuesday's (all the asterisks are the days i believe she said. I forget it was loud and i was drinking a decent amount already.). Yeah but i'm starting school next week so.
AAA: Oh that's cool. We'll it was nice meeting you HB8. My names AAAgent btw. Have a great night!

Waitress: smiles and high fives me.

I didn't number close because i would i really felt like i didn't earn it. I was tipping her well and i felt she only opened up easier to me because of that. I didn't have any opportunity for small talk so i guess tipping her well bypassed that barrier. I should have closed anyway since, any opportunity maybe the only opportunity.

Lesson learned. You earn all your chances.

The atmosphere is described below.

(she wasn't really my waitress or maybe she was. She was the only girl running the whole bar. Getting most of the table drinks, food and helping with the cleaning. It was loud, we were playing pong, i would have tried to talk to her somehow if there was a chance. Managed to stop her during the night a few times to get some food, extra pong balls (we asked for two, she made a corny joke), went to her personally to get another pitcher since the bartender was impossible to get to.)
 
Top