So... what is Flirting? I never Heard...

[moneyisking]

That's right gentleman. We all know what flirting is; especially our beloved Big Shot advisers in this forum who get laid easy, have firm control in life, and have much more things going on in life else than women would know exactly what flirting is. We all know who they are.

I mean, Sh!t, I know what flirting is, but I don't "KNOW" what it is. It's like people do know what a Man is, but they don't "REALLY KNOW" what Man is. You get what I am saying? That's how I feel about flirting. I never was taught of it, never heard someone telling me about it. So I want to get deep/good perspective on Flirting. Help me out, as usual. God Bless.

 

[Dannyrt34]

I got news for you,

You DO know what flirting is. It's actually a very broad term. There's many different ways to flirt. Also there's many different ways to be a man. It's tough to answer your question with such a broad subject.

I'll tell you this and possibly provide examples to you:

You need to think alot about your own personality. Are you a funny guy? Calm guy? Crazy guy? Then develop a certain style that fits your personality. I tend to use alot of subtle, humorous comments, while flirting with a girl.

Flirting can be done using actions or words. It's best to combine the two. For example, you are in the middle of a funny, flirtatious conversation with the girl and she is laughing. You put her in a fun, outgoing mood using your conversation. Then, you would do something like grab her ass playfully while she gives you a hug (Please don't do this if you're socially awkward, it will come off as creepy).

My best advice to you to flirt would be to bring up sex in the conversation in a subtle way. First ask her if she's had any one night stands. If she's says yes, then it's a perfect time for you to bust on her about that. If she says no. Jokingly be like "dam" and act dissapointed as if you aren't getting any that night. If done correctly, and if she is a cool girl, then you got an idea of what flirting is!

Most importantly, flirting is fun! If it's not fun for her, then you're doing it wrong. Happy flirting!

 

[Igetit!]

My best advice to you to flirt would be to bring up sex in the conversation in a subtle way.

You got my curiousity going with this one Danny.

Could you give an example of what you mean by this? Because if the OP means flirting with some girl who's new,who he doesn't know,that would be a delicate situation to approach.


Personally,I NEVER bring up sex,or that is,the actual physical act of sex.


The way I flirt is more like....

me:So what's up? Are we going out or what?
her: I don't know.
me:You don't know? Hmm. Well what if I promise to be good for the first 15 minutes of the date?


You see what I mean? I didn't bring up "SEX" directly. In fact, I NEVER say the "S" word.


I remember one time when I said that "15 minutes" line to a girl,and she looked at me with a twinkle in her eye,and slight grin on her face.




But yeah,if you could give an example of what you mean Danny,I'd like to see it.

First ask her if she's had any one night stands.

I don't know about this one man.

I'd think by saying this the girl will...

A:Be offended because she'll take it as you thinking she may be easy.

B:Think you are only after "one thing". Even if a girl is prone to one night stands,she doesn't want to be viewed as a slvt.


Also,if this is a girl you've known all of 2 to 3 minutes,I doubt she'd be willing to give out that kind of personal info about herself to a stranger.

Most importantly, flirting is fun! If it's not fun for her, then you're doing it wrong. Happy flirting!

Agreed.

Flirting should be a back and forth banter,like tennis.


If it's one-sided with you asking all the questions and her giving one word answers without contributing anything to the interaction,then like Danny said,you're doing something wrong.

 

[I'm in the Mood]

The way I flirt is more like....

me:So what's up? Are we going out or what?
her: I don't know.
me:You don't know? Hmm. Well what if I promise to be good for the first 15 minutes of the date?

Haha I like that one dude!

Last friday a girl was trying to poke me with a wooden sword and I was like "don't make me take mine out." I saw some strong attraction later in the night, I ended up kinda ditching her though which maybe I should feel bad about but oh well.

Anyway flirting is really easy, it's like playing "pretend relationship" and it sets the frame for a relationship. No way!

You ALREADY KNOW how to flirt because it's NATURAL.
The reason why you say you don't is because you're afraid that you'll mess up or perhaps offend a woman because you aren't a master flirter.

Well I'm not either dude but I can tell you this - the longer you hesitate to flirt, the less you'll have improved over time.

You can turn LOTS of things into flirting. One time me and a girl friend of mine were talking about dreams or sleeping or something, and somewhere I threw in "Well, it depends what I'm doing at night" (implying sex.)

It's that easy dude. Just play "pretend relationship" and make believe that she wants you and make fun of her for that.
C&F works very well here - "That's a lovely shirt! Did you get it at Salvation Army?"

Well maybe that's more of a neg lol, but you should get the idea by now.

 

[moneyisking]

Haha, I like Igetit's way of flirting. Of course I admire Danny's blatant exposure of sexuality, which I find hard to find to do, so mad applause for that. I always laugh the way Igetit brings out the flirting/CF. It is ingenious. Also, IntheMood, That is brilliant about "pretending relationship". I never thought of it that way. But anyways, I surely know that from the vibe of the writing, all 3 of you guys get laid and you know the answer I am looking for. Thanks for the advice!

 

[Dannyrt34]

You got my curiousity going with this one Danny.

Could you give an example of what you mean by this? Because if the OP means flirting with some girl who's new,who he doesn't know,that would be a delicate situation to approach.

I'll give it a shot and see if I can enlighten you on this.

I'm really not sure what I do, but I never had a girl get offended. I bring it up in as lighthearted way as possible. Of course I don't talk about sex right off the bat! I start the conversation with the basics, we tell each other stories and get comfortable talking to each other.

To transition into asking the question about a one night stand. I usually start with saying "Let's make things interesting. We'll each ask each other 10 questions, hard questions! And try to only ask things that you think the other person would want to lie about."

Girls seem to LOVE this, and it's great to get to know someone this way. It's always so fun to see what questions she thinks up.

But anyway, by playing this little game. It prepares the girl for just about anything, so it's not much of a shocker when the sex questions come up. It's really all lighthearted and mainly, fun!

And one more benefit to this, is for those guys that struggle with conversation. This technique really gives you SO MUCH to talk about with your date. If she gives a funny answer to one of your questions you can tease, and ask her to elaborate.

I really hope somebody tries it because I've had great success with this and I would love to see if it works for others. Just make sure the questions you use aren't too much like an 'interview', aka don't ask what she does for a living and all that junk.

Some questions I use:

I start off easy.
What is the worst date you ever had? (Pray she don't say this one)
Have you ever cheated on a guy?
What was your most embarassing moment?
Do you consider yourself clumsy?

Slowly transition your questions towards sex
How old were you when you had your first kiss?
Have you ever kissed a girl and you liked it? (This one got her laughing pretty hard)
How about the first time you had sex?
Ever have a one night stand?

You get the idea.

 

[Igetit!]

I'll give it a shot and see if I can enlighten you on this.

I'm really not sure what I do, but I never had a girl get offended. I bring it up in as lighthearted way as possible. Of course I don't talk about sex right off the bat! I start the conversation with the basics, we tell each other stories and get comfortable talking to each other.

Yeah,I see what you mean. The part I enboldened and enlarged is the key to this technique.

To transition into asking the question about a one night stand. I usually start with saying "Let's make things interesting. We'll each ask each other 10 questions, hard questions! And try to only ask things that you think the other person would want to lie about."

Girls seem to LOVE this, and it's great to get to know someone this way. It's always so fun to see what questions she thinks up.

Gotcha. Now I've got a better understanding of what you're saying.


By asking each other questions you're admitting personal things about yourself and that'll compell her to do the same.

But anyway, by playing this little game. It prepares the girl for just about anything, so it's not much of a shocker when the sex questions come up. It's really all lighthearted and mainly, fun!

And one more benefit to this, is for those guys that struggle with conversation. This technique really gives you SO MUCH to talk about with your date. If she gives a funny answer to one of your questions you can tease, and ask her to elaborate.

I really hope somebody tries it because I've had great success with this and I would love to see if it works for others.

Agreed. I like the way you broke it down and helped me to understand you're point of view.


This is rep worthy.


+1 rep.