So Should You Always Just Give Up When You're Told "I Have a Boyfriend?"

[Frank2500]

So here's the deal, folks. Just took a chance and talked to a woman who works at the International Students' Office at my school, where I go to from time to time to do paper work, since I'm not originally from the United States. She had short, black hair and I'm guessing she should be in her mid-20s, and was quite curvaceous, which was one of the things which drew me to her, when she turned around after giving me a form and I noticed her ass.

I have to admit though, that I made a mistake and she probably figured it out. I'm still trying to get over my occasional shyness when it comes to approaching some women. After she gave me the form, I left the office, but came back in just a few minutes later, pretending to ask a question. When she gave me the answer, I introduced myself to her and asked her name and sweet talked her a little bit. By that time, I'm sure she was able to figure out that this was the main reason why I came back in. Anyway, I thought the conversation went by quite smoothly and I got to make her smile and laugh a bit, flattered her with a little bit of French, etc. But when I suggested that we get together some time, she gave me the line I'm sure many of you are used to hearing on here as well: "I have a boyfriend and I don't think he'll be too happy to hear about that." After that, she said to me though, that:
"Hey. It's always good to ask."

I didn't think there was much else I could do after that. I know I'll probably end up running into her again next semester when I stop by there for paper work purposes. Also, sometimes the mere fact of being a non-domestic student is enough to keep "some" women away. So my question is, is there anything a man can do to woo a woman to his side that he feels strongly attracted to, even if she tells him that she has a boyfriend-which may or may not be true? If I run into this girl next time, even if she doesn't end up being the one who does my paper work, should I stop by at her office and say hello to her or would that put me into the friends zone? Will it be better for me to just ignore her and act as if I never talked to her before in the first place?

 

[Hitman10000]

Yes, even if a girl was dating some loser she would never mention she has a boyfriend so she can see what you're made out of. Women who are on the fence with their current partner who they are dating are 100% likely to cheat if there is a better partner that matches them better than current.

Also, please for sakes, don't pick up chicks at places where they work or even at the same place where you work! If they are in a different location away from their workplace is where you should attack. Or at least try to get them out of their workplace the first time you meet them!

 

[MisterNigma]

So What?

So, she says "I have a boyfriend"- this could mean any number of things. Regardless though, until you have more information, just keep on doing whatever it was you were doing.

If everything else about her behaviour says "yes", she's laughing, smiling, kino etc,. Why would you quit. So what if she has a boyfriend, she's not married... and even if she was... so what.

Unless you can see that the conversation is not going anywhere, just ignore the comment altogether, and keep going.

If it's in a bar, and a girl uses the boyfriend line to blow you off, just say "Oh I'm not interested in men, you can keep him."(Smile and walk off, or if she starts laughing, then stay...)


-E.Nigma

 

[Frank2500]

Re:

Thanks, folks. But Mr.Nigma, don't you think my chances with this woman who works at that office are pretty much slim to none now that she's told me she has a boyfriend already-regardless of whether it's true or not? I mean, if I keep trying to talk to her the next time I stop by at that office, she might view it as harrassment, since she's given me the "I have a boyfriend line" already. I mean, what could I possibly say at this point that would make her, the next time we get to see, avoid me into the "plutonic, non-attracted to/ friends zone" in the first place? She seems to have made up her mind already, regardless of whether or not she was telling the truth.

 

[MisterNigma]

Thanks, folks. But Mr.Nigma, don't you think my chances with this woman who works at that office are pretty much slim to none now that she's told me she has a boyfriend already-regardless of whether it's true or not? I mean, if I keep trying to talk to her the next time I stop by at that office, she might view it as harrassment, since she's given me the "I have a boyfriend line" already. I mean, what could I possibly say at this point that would make her, the next time we get to see, avoid me into the "plutonic, non-attracted to/ friends zone" in the first place? She seems to have made up her mind already, regardless of whether or not she was telling the truth.

To be honest, from what you're describing, I don't think this situation in particular is something you can salvage.

If you still want to try, that's your call, but I think you're better off moving on to other girls.

This is entirely theory, but if you were to go there again, a few times, for other legitimate reasons, there is really nothing wrong with just chatting with her. Get her to be interested in you. Tell her some DHV (demonstration of high value) stories. Since she is at work though, try to bring her our of "work mode" basically get her to stop thinking about work. Better yet, find some other venue where you can run into her. Dining Hall, student center, library, ect,.


-E.Nigma

 

[NewDestiny47]

I was told a girl had a fiance, which she did and had been together with for years, and I still had her fall in love with me, break up with him and tell me that I was what she had always dreamed of in a matter of less than a month.

I believe you screwed your situation up though. If I understand it right youve seen her from time to time but don't actually know her right?
Then you jumped right in and asked her out right away... IMO that doesn't work well.
In my situation, and something i recently saw my dad do too with good success, I first got to know the girl and became her really close friend while slowly, yet constantly upping the sexual teasing I would give her (you add it in so gradually that she doesn't even notice it, if you just tell her you want to bend her over from day one that's too much of a shock lol)
I did this over the period of two weeks, by the third week all we would do was joke around and flirt, id constantly give off signs that I wanted her but I never said it... it was obvious i was crazy about her but I never asked her out, nothing.
By the fourth week she just broke down and told me she was completely falling for me and couldn't help it, THEN I told her that I had feelings for her too.

I don't believe in making the first move, when ever ive gotten someone to seriously fall head over heels for me, ive hinted and hinted and flirted until they couldn't take it anymore and made the first move.