So she just admitted to cheating on me.

[Atom Smasher]

Ya'll mfers need to learn how to spot a troll.

Methinks the dawg is on the right scent

 

[Boris Rum]

Brother; it's over once she cheats on you. Lawyer up, find means to earn income and since she moved out, I presume she left the kids with you. Quickly file for a protection order, to prevent her coming near the house, you or the kids, including their schools. In the protective order, ask for some temporal child support, until the matter is heard. Most temporal protective orders will last up to 30 days before the hearing.

In the meantime, make sure the kids are used to having Mom not around. Most judges will not want to change the current custody arrangement, in the best interests of the kids. Do not fall for her cries, no mercy, no surrender, an eye for an eye brother. Do not date for now, fight for you and the kids first. Kids are innocent of the situation and you are the leader, though in a difficult situation. Good luck.

 

[BeTheChange]

I'm in as wa as well..

had a child with a bpd a while ago, lost custody do to false allegations.

only way thru it is to renounce yourself as a man in modern society. throw away your duty as a father/husband, get rid of that self image like the plague, let your kids go, let monogamy go.

flat out don't give a flying fvck about anyone but yourself.

depending on how conditioned you are, losing custody of your kids will make the strongest most valiant of men commit suicide.

just assume by being a male with kids, means you have virtually no rights or say about anything and the women will do and get away with anything she wants.

flip the script on hers and societys azz.
leave, walk away, give her anything she wants, give her the kids, money, assets, child support you name it.

treat divorce with kids just as you would if you were a business owner getting sued for a ton of money.

it's basically the same thing.

the devil of a paradox out of all this is when she understands how much of a ruthless bastrd you are she WILL end up behaving like a decent human again and well start begging for you back. so funny how this works.

women have a thing about attacking men in the core of his fvcking heart. they have a thing about sticking a rusty knife into your soul and twisting it, while blaming you for their problems.

theirs nothing worse that can happen to man spiritually then getting his kids ripped away, and being objectified while in the process.

it really amazes me still how women get off on destroying a man's pride. while blaming him at the same time.. with the government backing her up.

you're going to have to learn a whole new set of paradigms that goes contrary to the main stream belief systems.

read sex at dawn, the wisdom of psychopaths, sperm wars, and read everything you can about the history of religifon and sexual shame.

society is largely Catholic/Christian and that influence and conditioning led you to these problems and you don't even know it.

the rational male makes since and all but it's still scratching the surface. the book didn't do alot for me tbh. theirs alot more deeper things at play, trust me.

coming from a guy who suffered 3 years of bpd abuse divorce, lost my child, tons of money, felt the evil shame of society and pulled out of it happier with the best dating life I've ever had.

<3

Good post. What other book recommendations would you suggest other than the ones you mentioned?

 

[Chev.Chelios]

Good post. What other book recommendations would you suggest other than the ones you mentioned?

the fountainhead
atlas shrugged
read those and finish before you die..

no more mr nice guy
no excuses - Brian tracy
all tucker max books
healing from emotional abuse
I hate you don't leave me
stop walking on eggshells
mans search for meaning
psychopath free..

you can read everything under the sun but if you arnt smart and proactive about changing and becoming a man that overcomes these types of situations where you lose your wife and kids, you are basically FVCKED.

you need to read everything you can can your hands on about social conditioning, religious history.

monogamy and duty to society have been cleverly tied together to make you into a beta male that s vulnerable to heartbreak.

you learn at the end off the road to healing that everything you were taught about being a "man" is false. chivalry, honor, duty, masculinity is all 100% bull.

theirs a reason why psychos and people with personality disorders do better with women and dating. they don't get conditioned.

the greater bright minded dude you are, the more of a beta cuck you're going to be. pretty crazy realization.

 

[lamath]

May i suggest Tactical guide to women by Shaw T Smith

 

[that_guy_3301]

Quickly file for a protection order, to prevent her coming near the house, you or the kids, including their schools. In the protective order, ask for some temporal child support, until the matter is heard. Most temporal protective orders will last up to 30 days before the hearing.

Im actually okay with the arrangement we have now on some levels. Which is 2 days a week she gets them. It gives me time to develop myself and frankly when I start dating again Its going to be 2 days I can use to be with a woman who respects me.

 

[logicallefty]

On other thing - yes, use email for communication. BUT BE VERY AWARE THAT ANYTHING YOU SEE IN THAT EMAIL WILL BE PRINTED AND SUBMITTED TO A JUDGE.

CHOOSE YOUR WORDS VERY CAREFULLY.

That's exactly right, and that's what you want. Each email has to be carefully worded with no cussing as I mentioned in my post above. And also, no CAPITAL LETTERS. A Judge once told me that capital letters are considered as yelling in his eyes and many judges. The same judge also told me that "Verbal testimony will only get you so far. If something is in writing it's going to have more influence in court vs something that isn't." For most judges, consider the odds stacked 3 to 1. Her 2 x tits + 1 x word vs. your 1 x word. Anything in writing you have is going to put your odds back to equal if not in your favor.

 

[that_guy_3301]

Okay so update, I saw her on Thursday to hand off the children. She tried hurriedly to give me a present and I refused walking away. She shouted for me to take it I said no after I had said profusely that I wanted space. Again yesterday she said she wanted to come over when she dropped them off to gahter hair dye.
Today I changed the locks on the front door and she got very angry when she saw the lowes bil on the CC. She freaked out and then again blamed me, and my anime figures (yes I know) for why she cheated saying she felt constatnt disrespect. I then mentioned that I had many times brought her flowers, chocolates, and rings and she hand waved that as too late into the relationship to make a difference. (It was literally about a months worth of non stop attention and gifts before she left).

So I have 2 lawyers. Both do resolution. One needs to wait till March 4th because of clients. The other can do it now as my attorney or as a conflict mediator. I think I am going to just hire him as a attorney.

She again is acting like a victim and that this is sooo hard on her and she feels sick while out there ****ing a stranger and day drinking. She is referring to our house as 'her house'.

How am I doing guys?

 

[lamath]

Okay so update, I saw her on Thursday to hand off the children. She tried hurriedly to give me a present and I refused walking away. She shouted for me to take it I said no after I had said profusely that I wanted space. Again yesterday she said she wanted to come over when she dropped them off to gahter hair dye.
Today I changed the locks on the front door and she got very angry when she saw the lowes bil on the CC. She freaked out and then again blamed me, and my anime figures (yes I know) for why she cheated saying she felt constatnt disrespect. I then mentioned that I had many times brought her flowers, chocolates, and rings and she hand waved that as too late into the relationship to make a difference. (It was literally about a months worth of non stop attention and gifts before she left).

So I have 2 lawyers. Both do resolution. One needs to wait till March 4th because of clients. The other can do it now as my attorney or as a conflict mediator. I think I am going to just hire him as a attorney.

She again is acting like a victim and that this is sooo hard on her and she feels sick while out there ****ing a stranger and day drinking. She is referring to our house as 'her house'.

How am I doing guys?

I think you are doing good.
About her freaking out at you about locks and figurine, disengage asap dont argue. If on the Phone hang up if in person just leave.

 

[evan12]

Im actually okay with the arrangement we have now on some levels. Which is 2 days a week she gets them. It gives me time to develop myself and frankly when I start dating again Its going to be 2 days I can use to be with a woman who respects me.

Are you in shape? if not start getting in shape, dating market is not easy as it was 15 year ago

 

[Spaz]

That's exactly right, and that's what you want. Each email has to be carefully worded with no cussing as I mentioned in my post above. And also, no CAPITAL LETTERS. A Judge once told me that capital letters are considered as yelling in his eyes and many judges. The same judge also told me that "Verbal testimony will only get you so far. If something is in writing it's going to have more influence in court vs something that isn't." For most judges, consider the odds stacked 3 to 1. Her 2 x tits + 1 x word vs. your 1 x word. Anything in writing you have is going to put your odds back to equal if not in your favor.

Really good advice here.

In professional circles this is the practised and sometimes when it comes to our personal lifes we men tend to forget it.

I myself got caught with my pants down on a number of occasions in the past and got burned needlessly.

 

[that_guy_3301]

Really good advice here.

In professional circles this is the practised and sometimes when it comes to our personal lifes we men tend to forget it.

I myself got caught with my pants down on a number of occasions in the past and got burned needlessly.

I did reply twice in caps and regretted it. Once as a joke by saying "DAS RIGHT" and another time she blamed my hobbies for her cheating and I replied. "NO".

Guys I'm genX and so many people from our gen have committed suicide and I am pretty sure us being the first generation to experience mass divorce had something to do with that.

I almost want to take her back just so the kids can have a home with two parents in it. I hate her, but I would suffer anything for their happiness. I would even build a ****ing man cave to be away from her. I don't want my daughter to get fat, and my sons to end up on opiates/suicide.
Tell me I'm a ****ing retard because man I love them so much I would give everything for them, they are the future and the ultimate purpose of my life.

 

[GT40]

You are doing well. Stay the course and don’t buy into her BS. Get lots of sleep and keep a clear head. No booze or drugs.

 

[glass half full]

I did reply twice in caps and regretted it. Once as a joke by saying "DAS RIGHT" and another time she blamed my hobbies for her cheating and I replied. "NO".

Guys I'm genX and so many people from our gen have committed suicide and I am pretty sure us being the first generation to experience mass divorce had something to do with that.

I almost want to take her back just so the kids can have a home with two parents in it. I hate her, but I would suffer anything for their happiness. I would even build a ****ing man cave to be away from her. I don't want my daughter to get fat, and my sons to end up on opiates/suicide.
Tell me I'm a ****ing retard because man I love them so much I would give everything for them, they are the future and the ultimate purpose of my life.

So, later on you can blame her hobbies for her cheating.
Watch how that works. She'll love that! (sarcasm)

 

[SoSuave666]

I did reply twice in caps and regretted it. Once as a joke by saying "DAS RIGHT" and another time she blamed my hobbies for her cheating and I replied. "NO".

Guys I'm genX and so many people from our gen have committed suicide and I am pretty sure us being the first generation to experience mass divorce had something to do with that.

I almost want to take her back just so the kids can have a home with two parents in it. I hate her, but I would suffer anything for their happiness. I would even build a ****ing man cave to be away from her. I don't want my daughter to get fat, and my sons to end up on opiates/suicide.
Tell me I'm a ****ing retard because man I love them so much I would give everything for them, they are the future and the ultimate purpose of my life.

This is a natural love you will always have for your children. You need to separate that from the way you feel for her...which you have correctly recognized. You are doing well. Communicate with your ex via email, leave everything else to the lawyers. When you have to see her, keep it curt and enjoy your time with kids.

Go out and work out, no need to worry about women for now. You are a man and have more important things to worry about.

Move ahead with confidence and determination. Remind yourself what is truly important in your life every day.

 

[logicallefty]

Amazing isn’t it? She moves out and cheats on the OP. So he does what’s best for himself; he pulls back and switches to preservation mode. And wow she wants him back! None of us need to have a time machine and go back in time to know what she would be doing to him if he started giving her affection and told her he wanted her back too? Typical bs. Op you are doing great! Regarding the kids that’s on her not you. She is going to have to explain to them that she ended the relationship and why in the future when they start asking questions. She cheated so she had the burden of the end to explain to the kids, you don’t.

 

[GT40]

Just keep doing the 180. No texts no affection no reconcilliation talk.
Too late she screwed up it’s on her. Then she’ll be all I want you back, don’t do this don’t go.
You have the upper hand.

 

[lamath]

OP you think traditional role reversal here might have a part in this?

 

[mrgoodstuff]

OP you think traditional role reversal here might have a part in this?

They are being preached and coached to multi date multiple c0cks. To cheat up until marriage ( if i aint married im single ) and for their agenda to be the relationship priority after marriage. They will shut a man down quick. Marriage in our culture imho is a ritual in which man sacrifices himself and submits to his earthly master.

 

[niceguytoalphamale]

@mrgoodstuff that was so true