So I just talked to my "friend"

[JonJack]

You act like you're all tough and macho over this thing but you don't even have the balls to do it right there and then. Why? Because you're waiting for the best time to 'next' her ass? There is no best time. Why do you even care so much?

You try and validate yourself. You expect that with what you've 'given' to her, she needs to repay you by suddenly having feelings for you when none existed. What sort of freaky mentality is that? Do you even know how loser-ish you're acting? And now you want to get 'revenge' on her ass? Why man? Because you can't stand losing? Because you need to reclaim your balls since you regreted giving it to her?

C'mon dude. Sit down, and reflect on your behaviour. It seriously needs some improvement.

 

[Tomb]

donjuanapprentice01: Listen to what everyone is saying here. But before you can truly improve yourself. You must stop lying to yourself. You are in denial that you have control over this situation. You must admit she hurt you alot, at one time we all went through the pain too. You say you are a nice guy, but right now you want revenge, that isn't an act of a nice guy. That's pure evil. Let all the pain inside you out with a cry. It's ok to cry if it hurts. Then after you depleted your tears, pick yourself up and look out the window. Another day has come and a new beginning for you. Start reading the DJ bible more carefully, understand the knowledge and put it into practice.

Be strong, be positive, be real!

 

[stalluproar]

Stop trying to manipulate her. That is what you are doing. From the beginning, the end, and the psuedo end. She smells it from a mile away and there is no DEET you can spray on to get rid of the smell.

What is possessing you to next her when the nexting has already been done? Women say they want to be friends so they don't hurt your feelings.

 

[donjuanapprentice01]

I'm not looking for revenge, I just want to get rid of her now. I wanted to do it person, I'm not going to be mean about it, but I'm going to tell her that I can't be friends with her because, well, how can you be friends with a chick you want to bang?

I kind of got hot under the collar earlier, I apologize, I'm not looking for revenge, just got a little upset that's all. We had a good friendship, just that I feel I have to end it because it hurts being around her.

 

[Iamnotacrook]

Originally posted by ikkenai
YOU'RE GOING AFTER A WOMAN WITH A SON?! BAHHAHAHHAHAHHAHAHAHHAHAHAHHAHAHHAHAHAHHAHAHHJOEOHOE@HH$@%!!!!

:crackup:

 

[donjuanapprentice01]

Originally posted by stalluproar
Stop trying to manipulate her. That is what you are doing. From the beginning, the end, and the psuedo end. She smells it from a mile away and there is no DEET you can spray on to get rid of the smell.

What is possessing you to next her when the nexting has already been done? Women say they want to be friends so they don't hurt your feelings.

I'm not manipulating her, what gave you that idea? She knew I liked her, so she had a choice, and she would rather be single than with me. Fine, case closed, but I don't feel I have to give her the satisfaction of sticking around as her "friend" while she goes out and finds some other dude to bang, and then puts me to the side. That **** ain't happening. Not with me.

What is possessing you to next her when the nexting has already been done? Women say they want to be friends so they don't hurt your feelings.

She genuinely wants to be friends with me. I've known her for 3 months now, we have spent tons of time together, went on trips, etc... She told me she didn't want to lose the friendship, that was the first thing she said.

The bottom line here is, I'm in the "friend zone". Every girl I have been with put me in the "friend zone" and I'm sick and tired of it, so, I'm getting out of the "friend zone" by elimintating it.

 

[Iamnotacrook]

...Stupid ass mother****er.

 

[JonJack]

I hope you do realize that it's perfectly okay to be friends with girls. Even those that you want to bang. It only becomes a problem when you can't bring yourself to accept the fact that you won't be able to bang her. C'mon man, no one can expect to bang every girl they go after. If you enjoy the girl's company, then just accept it, take away that desire to bang her and place that desire on some other girl.

You're the one that desides whether you still want to be friends or not. If you choose not to, then just break all contact. If you want to keep that friendship, then treat her like a sister.

 

[Tomb]

Originally posted by JonJack
I hope you do realize that it's perfectly okay to be friends with girls. Even those that you want to bang. It only becomes a problem when you can't bring yourself to accept the fact that you won't be able to bang her. C'mon man, no one can expect to bang every girl they go after. If you enjoy the girl's company, then just accept it, take away that desire to bang her and place that desire on some other girl.

You're the one that desides whether you still want to be friends or not. If you choose not to, then just break all contact. If you want to keep that friendship, then treat her like a sister.

Obviously, donjuanapprentice only befriend her with the intention of banging her. Now that he can't, he has no reason to stay as friends.

 

[Dr Box]

Ahhhhhhahahahaha,
Dude you so didn't next her.....nor is there anyway you can next her, there is so many things wrong with that convo I don't know where to begin, reading that made my eyes bleed.
You are still and AFC and unless you start to read a bit more and go out and meet some more women you will be for a while.
Just a bit of adivce she, she won't miss you when you are no longer friends she will just find other friends...also the fact that you laugh at someone who doesn't have many friends (someone who you were supposed to be attracted to) means there is something wrong with your wiring, just cause she blew you off doesnt mean you should hate her. Deal with your issues, dont blame her. nuff said

 

[bp1974]

It was uncomfortable reading that conversation, because you said a lot of the things I use to think.

One - It sounded like you were trying to convince her that she should be attracted to you because you like children etc. There a great post by DeepBlue in the archive about why that will never work. Here it is.

Two - Somewhere along the line you've learnt to believe that if you are nice enough and 'good' enough, the women you are nice and good to will want you sexually. THIS IS NOT TRUE.

It's a 'covert contract'. ie, you have this deal in mind that if you are nice and good to her, she will want you. But you're the only one who knows that this is the deal. She doesn't know what you're expecting her to do in return, she just thinks you're being generous and caring.

Being nice has nothing to do with it. If she is attracted to you, and you let her know that you want her, then you and she will get together irrespective of how many favours you have or haven't done for her, or how much time you've spent with her child.

Think about it. In your conversation, you basically told her you think she should want you because you spent time with her child. You're using her kid to try and get her naked?? WTF.

Three - Right now it sounds like you are all about 'her' ('her' being whoever you are attracted to at the time). I bet you worry about what she likes, what she doesn't like, how you should be with her to 'make' her like you etc. This does not work, because there's nothing of 'you' in there.

How is a woman to feel attracted to you if you're spending alll your time worrying about what she wants, rather than spending your time SHOWING her who you are?

If you show her who you are, she then has the opportunity to find out whether she finds you attractive. Right now you're not giving women this chance, that's why you end up in the friend zone.

Go and have a look at some of the posts around here. If you don't find the glimmerings of some insight into the kind of personal issues you need to work on, then I'll be surprised. Do a search there for 'covert contracts'.