So I broke up with her.

[Glassguy]

I counsel women with C-PTSD. Some of them are battered, but still pining for the abusive ******* because "we've been together for X years". Well, I have news for you, honey, you won't get back the time you invested. And the longer you stay with the abusive person, the more you keep investing emotionally like flushing money down the toilet, the more foolish you are for expecting something back.

Even when you're not abused, just chalk up the investment you put in the relationship as a fee for gaining life experience, and don't make the same mistakes with the next relationship.

Good post

 

[Learning Curve]

So a few flirty text back and forth. Kinda seemed like it was inevitable, we were going to see each other.

"Where I'm at, I've decided that I'm going to be in a happy and positive relationship. For me to have that I need to bring my best self to the table, be happy and fully functional in myself , and in order for me to do that I need to work on me. So that's what I'm doing.

I also know for any positive happy relationship there needs to be that balance from both people in it.

I would I would like that person to be you , but if you can't be that person, I know I can find someone else that will be.

I've decided to be happy no matter what, your choice is whether or you want the same"

I kinda sent her this... Basically my version of what was in a book I'm currently reading.

IT DID NOT GO DOWN WELL!!! She had a fit, angry text how it's about all about me me me, go find another girl, and a very angry phone call.

Blocked me on most things. Sent me a text this morning though, which I didn't respond too.

Something along the lines "it's okay for me I'm all hunky dory, everything is so hard for her, she needs to cut contact so we both know our it feels".



Going to keep focusing on gym, my business, connecting with friends. Don't want to go into a downward spiral.


Also phoned a therapist today, got an appointment tomorrow. I don't believe I have any deep issues.

Just want to book myself into the garage, get outside perspective , have a look at myself and see if there are things I need to uncover and work on.

From experience.

Did the same thing to my EX after a 4 year of relationship. It was constant fighting that dragged on for too long.

Once i dumped her a$$ she was crawling back within a week, showing up at my house crying and begging and pleading. I never too her back.

It was done ultimately for me.

The thing is most guys will say never accept her back. Because the result will be the same and i agree it will probably be the same result over and over again. Been there and done that.

Sometimes breakups have to happen to reset a relationship. But rarely it works because something will happen and you will move on to the default again fighting and arguing. It's toxic and draining and it will destroy you mentally.

Decide what you want but for now, as all the guys mentioned above cut all ties no contact, no responses let her brain hamster spin for good.