So how do you steal away some guy's girlfriend?

blueline

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This girl I want is in a seemingly great relationship (facebook profile pic of her kissing him, leaving all these gay cutesy messages). However, I'm better looking than her dude and probably a better socializer (i.e. maybe more alpha than him). I've never met the guy, but looking at their facebook pics, he looks like a novice. Nothing against him. If she wants a cute sort of intellectual guy, I'm her boyfriend at the next level, haha.

I have simply not mentally connected with a good looking girl (or girl in general) like this for a while. Being a good/interesting conversationalist and having a personality similar to mine is very attractive. I mean, it's not oneitis level Special as she definitely has her flaws, but I just wanna see what fucking her would be like.

I know how to seduce girls (in person at least, lol) I just met, however girls I've known for a few months, no idea.

Last time I made a deep connection with a girl (talked about love a lot with her and she helped me get through breaking up with my ex), we ended up banging after a few months without me even laying any "attraction" material on her. I spoke that girl's language, we could talk for fucking hours without any uncomfortableness. One thing that may have helped big time was denying her any physical interaction with me the day I broke up with my ex (I wasn't up for it, I was feeling dead inside!). Two months later, the sex just happened, I didn't game her at all. The kino was not incremental, it was just from 0-60. I hadn't done so more than give her a short hug once two months before. I got a bit drunk at a party, grabbed her, and started making out with her, then we just banged like 10 minutes later. She even had a more athletic looking date at that party and I still blew that guy out of the water. To this day, I'm certain she thinks about me constantly and is oneitising over me. No real work was put in.

I know enough about this new girl and have similar enough a personality to forge a really deep connection. We've talked about love a lot (not quite in the same way as the last one, but I can easily take things there) and past relationships a lot. I even told her how I ****ed some girl I met 30 minutes before in an outdoor stairwell, but described it in a way that was like "You know, when you feel such an intense connection and passion for someone that you just have to let it all go? Well, that's basically what happened there." I have a feeling I can speak this one's language, too.

So how do I pull her away from the BF? Do I game hotter girls in front of her (ex gf was objectively hotter than the girl that helped me get through breaking up with her)? Do I try to get some more hangouts without any pretense of a date and just pretend as if bf doesn't exist? Honestly, I don't want to lose this girl's friendship if she isn't interested. My usual game with girls is 30 minutes of convo while escalating until I hit some boundary. It's kinda too reckless abandon for this. I have two classes with her this semester and 3 weeks left in the semester. She lives pretty close to me during break, however.

Sorry for the wall o' text.
 

Falcon25

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Try to get your own girl. It will build character. Not to mention, make you a strong man.
 

blueline

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I can get other girls but I want this girl ;) (perhaps the definition of oneitis, haha). I dunno, I guess I can remain "friends" with her until her bf and her breakup, then bust a move 'cause once this year is over, she'll be in my master's program and her bf will have graduated from undergrad (aka bon voyage). They've already broken up once before like a year ago, but they've been in a relationship for like almost 4 years, I think.
 

The Bad Ass Canadian

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The short answer is that you don't steal another guy's girl. Attempting to and failing makes you look like an idiot and a chump, and overtly stealing her shows a total lack integrity.

A real man does not mess with chicks who are already taken. You should be better than that. If your desires for her are clouding your judgment and rendering you willing to even entertain the idea, then you need to reevaluate your core values and belief systems.

But, for future reference, if you do meet a girl you really do jive with and connect with on a deep level, and she's taken:

Be excellent on every level, enjoy the moment you spend together as two human beings, and then leave with no desire for more. If she feels that connection and decides you're better for her than her current situation, she will give chase and want to be around you more.
 

Chickfight

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Canadian is pretty much on the mark.
I'd continue what you're doing now. Just make sure to don't act too much like a "bff" towards her. Keep gaming other girls and letting her know about it. DEFINITELY don't talk to her about her problems with her boyfriend. If she brings him up, just say some thing like "he seems like a nice guy, you two should just work it out on your own". Be that fun, exciting guy who's a player, but she knows inside is just looking for the right girl which will contrast with her boyfriend of 4 years.

PS. I don't agree with what you're trying to do, but I'm not here to judge you and I don't think anyone else here should either. If she becomes unsatisfied with her boyfriend and would leave him for you, then if you didn't steal her, some other guy eventually would have.
 

TizZle

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Chumps tie down chicks all the time. I think the term the OP is looking for is "straw man".

Chickfight gave you a general line to use
The "nice guy" part is the destructive seed
 

vatoloco

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Unless she wants to be "stolen," you'll just be wasting your time, IMO. Any physical IOIs from this girl?

There's this girl I work with (she's around a 7.5) who is in a LTR but I can tell by her BL and demeanor (I've been around the block a few times -- trust me, I know! ;)) that she's VERY attracted to me. Of course, I'm not gonna tap it (I happen to like and need my job -- you know, a guy's gotta eat and pay his mortgage!) but let's just say that if she were to quit tomorrow, you can bet she would be beggin' me to do her.

Women are always looking for the BBD, so if you fit the criteria, you will become the new branch...

Of course, assuming that she is attracted to you! ;)
 

xdreamz

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wat if you were in the mood to do something scandalous like get some decent girl to bang that guy, get evidence that they had sex, convey the information second hand to the girl and then approach her? nm that would take way too much.
 

t4ytime

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I have a similar issue but on a smaller scale. There is a girl at work that I flirt with constantly. She has a live-in boyfriend who pretty much looks average and has these stupid poses on their fbook pics. She and I have plenty of chemistry but you know, so what? You guys are right. Get my own girl, and still do light flirting. I like to sleep at night. I'm telling you, if they do it with you, they'll do it to you.
 

synergy1

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Let me preface this by saying that I don't agree with wheeling another dudes broad, even if she's into you. Morals aside, here have been my limited experiences:

Got one without even trying anything different from what I normally do. I didn't know she had a boyfriend until after. Lesson learned here: if a chick wants you and has a bf, you might not even know about it.

The second instance (thankfully) nothing happened, but it easily could have. She was dating some dude from Harvard who didn't like doing much, but I was always hanging out w/ mutual friends. You ever know that feeling when you first meet a chick and you know its on? It was there, even in front of her bf. Again, didn't really have to do much here. There came a point during one of the nights out that her friend called me out...a good thing since I don't really want to be that kind of person. Nature was just taking over!

So whats the lesson here? The tension between two people will form regardless of significant others. If you really want to 'steal', just promote this attraction until it becomes too strong to stop.

That said, please....don't . Had something happened in the second case, I would have lower regards for her and myself.
 

JCballin88

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I'm also sort-of guilty of attempting to pull "the robbery" a little bit as of late.

I have been hanging out casually with this girl from my class at college who was really interested in hanging out after we talked a little bit online over the summer. We went out for drinks the first night and really hit it off amazing. After we went out for ice cream two weeks later (she pays for herself) I ask her to come chill over at my dorm and she texted me:
Hey, so I had a really fun time today. I should probly mention that I have a b/f back home, but I'd love to still hang out and keep each other sane around here

After that I sort-of went no-contact until she was practically begging to go out and do something else. We went out for some wings and there was a really good, flirtatious vibe. She was the one who then suggested we hang out at the bar for a while and grab a beer, where things got even more heavy.

I don't mean to hijack this thread completely, but I would appreciate any advice people have on this situation. One thing that's really thrown me off is that she has never once, in four times going out, mentioned anything about her b/f to me in person. I had no clue this guy existed when we talked during the summer and after the first two times of going out off-campus. It seems like her IL is rising every time, and if this boyfriend had seen us flirting/heavy kino etc., it would not have looked good. I also realize that LDRs, especially in college, are usually doomed to fail at some point. My gut was telling me that she's at least mildly "testing the waters," but because of my combination of respect for her b/f and wussiness to make a move and kiss her, I'm kind-of in an weird limbo.
 

blueline

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Yeah, after flirting with her for nearly a month, she sort off-handedly mentioned her boyfriend, but otherwise, the guy is never mentioned. The tone of voice she used to mention him was kinda funny, too. I was like "How do you know this guy?" and she bit her lip and said "my boyfriend" really quickly. I'm just gonna keep flirting with her and working other girls in the mean time. I've been doing that all semester anyways, but I've just kept the kino way down. However, yesterday I had a real conversation with her and was like "damn, there is some substance to this girl. do want."
 

vatoloco

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blueline said:
Yeah, after flirting with her for nearly a month, she sort off-handedly mentioned her boyfriend, but otherwise, the guy is never mentioned. The tone of voice she used to mention him was kinda funny, too. I was like "How do you know this guy?" and she bit her lip and said "my boyfriend" really quickly. I'm just gonna keep flirting with her and working other girls in the mean time. I've been doing that all semester anyways, but I've just kept the kino way down. However, yesterday I had a real conversation with her and was like "damn, there is some substance to this girl. do want."
Let's play a game. It's called "Who Can Spot the Obvious Problem with This Situation and Point It Out?"

Who wants to go first?

;)
 

Galactus

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I knew when I saw the title, that there were going to be a lot of people telling you to just leave it alone, that you're not being a DJ and so on. Bullsh!t.

Most women are taken, at least the good ones. Get your own girl, right. She had a boyfriend when she met the one she has now. Don't worry about if she's married or has a boyfriend. That's not your concern, and it's none of your business. You see a woman you like, go talk to her. Hit on her. Make your move, and don't think twice about it. That's being a man.

If she doesn't want you, she will let you know. If she does, that's cool too. If her boo can't handle it, that's his problem. He should be a man and move on, just like you would if your girl became interested in another guy. Because you know you don't own her, just as he doesn't.

Go after her. The only thing that should stop you is if she isn't interested.
 

blueline

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vatoloco said:
Let's play a game. It's called "Who Can Spot the Obvious Problem with This Situation and Point It Out?"

Who wants to go first?

;)
What? Very little kino? That she regrettably mentioned her boyfriend and biting her lip afterwards? It's not a problem. Like I said earlier, I've gone from 0-60 with girls I'm 'friends' with before. Fast, heavy kino is probably only necessary if you're working a girl at a bar/party, on a date, or whatever.
 

vatoloco

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blueline said:
Yeah, after flirting with her for nearly a month, she sort off-handedly mentioned her boyfriend, but otherwise, the guy is never mentioned. The tone of voice she used to mention him was kinda funny, too. I was like "How do you know this guy?" and she bit her lip and said "my boyfriend" really quickly. I'm just gonna keep flirting with her and working other girls in the mean time. I've been doing that all semester anyways, but I've just kept the kino way down. However, yesterday I had a real conversation with her and was like "damn, there is some substance to this girl. do want."
;)

Don't delude yourself into thinking that this girl has "substance." Sure, she might be pretty; she might be hot; she might give great oral sex and be into swinger parties.

However, in spite of all those things, a good-quality woman this is not. Though it's only partially her fault. The boyfriend is probably an AFC and she's looking to get a little "extra" attention from boys and/or she's looking to swing to a new branch. If she truly liked/loved AND RESPECTED the guy (and he had the "substance" to warrant all those things from her), she wouldn't be seeking attention from you and the many other guys she's talking to (you're not the only one, btw ;)).

This one's not a loyal one. A FB, ONS or other non-committal thing is what I would advise with this girl.

Again...

"Of course, assuming that she is attracted to you! ;)"
 

Kailex

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Read my signature.

Read it again.

Go watch the video.

Listen to the lyrics.

That's what you're trying to turn her into.
You want her as an LTR. I wanted to jump in here but vato got to it first.

This CANNOT go past a ONS or FB... if you are truly going to go through with this... but the way you are talking about her... seems like you want to be a "boyfriend" and if you do... you've already failed.
 

Gangster Of Love

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blueline said:
I can get other girls but I want this girl ;) (perhaps the definition of oneitis, haha). I dunno, I guess I can remain "friends" with her until her bf and her breakup, then bust a move 'cause once this year is over, she'll be in my master's program and her bf will have graduated from undergrad (aka bon voyage). They've already broken up once before like a year ago, but they've been in a relationship for like almost 4 years, I think.

How do you steal a guy's girlfriend? Simple. By simply representing an obvious and convincing "upgrade", in her eyes. You don't do this by saying you are so great. This is all show and tell. YOu won't get her by telling her, or us, how great you are. You will get it done by showing her how great you are and how much of an upgrade you represent.

Looks like you've known her for a while now, and it is not that obvious to her just how great you are. Why is it so important to you to not looser her friendship? If you just care about getting your c0ck wet in her, then you sure don't care about her being happy. Make up your mind. Can't have it both ways. Sounds like you want to be in her boyfriend's shoes. Do tell.
 
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