Inspector Clouseau
Senior Don Juan
UNSMART MEN think dating an average woman happens in a vaccuum.
SMART MEN know competition always exists until the woman begs him for exclusivity. Even then, he knows the battle is never completely won.
UNSMART MEN believe in destiny and fate.
SMART MEN knows nothing happens on purpose and he must be the one who actively takes steps to create the life he desires, leaving nothing to chance. Smart men know if nothing is done, nothing will happen.
UNSMART MEN wish and hope for a woman to approach him or ask him out.
SMART MEN do not live in dreams.
UNSMART MEN wish he was born a woman.
SMART MEN love being a man. Smart men don't obsess over his body, he doesn't need others to know what's good or bad, he doesn't backstab his friends, he pursues what he wants over what pursues him. Smart men lead life, not let life lead him. Why, smart men wonder, would anyone want it any other way?
UNSMART MEN think a HB is out of his league.
SMART MEN know no woman is out of his reach; it's only a question whether he is out of her reach.
UNSMART MEN only pursue one women at a time.
SMART MEN know life's a numbers game, where every "no" is one less until a "yes," and to spread himself out thin for maximum chance of success. If he hedges all bets on one woman, and such success with such woman falls through, he is left in a basement crater.
UNSMART MEN pursue that one "special" woman, disregarding all other women.
SMART MEN knows the "special" woman doesn't exist, yet simultaneously knows all women have potential to be special.
UNSMART MEN believe in a "soulmate."
SMART MEN know potentially thousands if not millions of women are potential "soulmates." There is no "The One." Smart men know "soulmates" is only another way to describe compatibility, which isn't mystical to find.
UNSMART MEN go for relationship first, sex second.
SMART MEN know to go for sex first, then if he wants relationship second; he knows going for a committed relationship first will only bastardize the chances of getting the girl. Smart men know before sex women look for reasons to ditch a guy, but after sex women look for reasons to keep the guy. Smart men know people inherently resist change in their life, even change for the better.
UNSMART MEN listen to women.
SMART MEN do not believe what a woman says, rather he is guided by her actions, for actions speak louder than words and it's common for a woman's words to contradict her actions. Smart men listen to women, but only take stock in what women say if supported by action.
UNSMART MEN act like women by following women's standard's of male behavior.
SMART MEN follow successful fellow MEN'S standards of action, and consequently act like a MEN. Men should act like men, women like women. Follow?
UNSMART MEN think women want nice guys.
SMART MEN know women do not want a teddy bear, a chump, which is what most nice guys are -- all cute, snuggly, safe, nonsexual, and inanimate... but what if that sweet teddy bear tried to make a move and grope her? Smart men know what women really want is a REAL MAN -- everything positive about a "nice guy," except with confidence, decisiveness, sexuality -- not some boy.
UNSMART MEN consider women goddesses.
SMART MEN don't put women on a pedestal. Smart men know they are the great catch, whose attention and interest is to be won, not vice versa. Smart men revolve their life around their life, not around women; smart men know by asking a woman out, he's inviting her into his world, not vice versa, and if she rejects it's her loss, not his.
UNSMART MEN treat women like queens.
SMART MEN know the economic law of Marginal Diminishing Utilities; the more you get something, the less it means to you. Smart men know the less you give a woman, the more she gives you. Smart men know the more he gives a woman, the higher the bar of required maintenance; smart men know women will eventually need more to sustain her current level of happiness. Smart men know it's best to leave a woman on her toes guessing what happens next.
UNSMART MEN consider women as "delicate flowers, to be cared for, caressed, watered;" and unsmart men treat women as such (read: treat a woman non-sexually).
SMART MEN know women are sexual creatures, and treat them as such. Smart men respect a woman, but while there's more to women than just sex, bottom line women are about sex. Smart men know they must show sexual interest upfront -- without coming off as only about sex; failing that he will make her feel he finds her a turn off, that he's essentially non-sexual (read: chump); a FRIEND.
UNSMART MEN verbally express their emotions.
SMART MEN express through action. Smart men also know expressing feelings, before the woman expresses hers, is equal to death. Smart men know never emotionally invest in a woman more than she invests in him.
UNSMART MEN think by befriending a woman, the closer he achieves to bedding her.
SMART MEN knows such is hogwash; it's best he spend the least amount of time with her as possible before dating her, before banging her. Smart men know melting her ice shields is accomplished by flirting, not by becoming friends (flirting=potential lovers, friends=FRIENDS=DEATH). Smart men know not to talk about his problems or shortcomings -- always keep conversation light and positive, and not allow himself play role of a woman's emotional tampon, soaking up all her problems. Smart men know before sex women look for reasons to ditch a guy, but after sex women look for reasons to keep the guy.
UNSMART MEN think nice guys finish last.
SMART MEN know chumps never finish. Chumps, in time, get married only because the wife couldn't find a better man and doesn't actually love him.
UNSMART MEN complain about high maintenance women.
SMART MEN know while superficial and materialistic women are problematic, all women have some aspect of high maintenance, whether it be issues of time, money, opinions, wanting kids, etc. Smart men also know there are high maintenance men.
UNSMART MEN complain about golddiggers.
SMART MEN know at heart all women, ultimately, are golddiggers. All women naturally want the best for her now and future family, she wants the most economically comfortable life to raise her family in. Even if she doesn't want kids, she will still seek out the best husband she can find. Smart men know it's only a matter of how accepting the woman is of his shortcomings.
UNSMART MEN keep unrealistically high standards, looking for that "truly great, rare women."
SMART MEN keep their standards open-minded, flexible. Smart men know they must tread through quantity to find quality, and along the way they will find surprises. The great woman is not so rare after all.
UNSMART MEN think in terms of black-and-white, good and bad.
SMART MEN know there are four types of women: sheeps, foxes, foxes dressed as sheeps, sheeps dressed as foxes.
UNSMART MEN think being seen with a woman lowers his chances with other women.
SMART MEN know being seen with women multiplies by some great number his chances in attracting other women. Smart men know to go shopping with female friends.
UNSMART MEN believe a woman when she says she'll call sometime.
SMART MEN know never ever expect a woman to initiate a phone call, at least during the early dating stages. Ever. The exceptions are so rare as to be practically non-existent.
UNSMART MEN wonder "What if she has a boyfriend?"/"Does she like me?"
SMART MEN eliminate such questions from their vocabulary. They make moves and are guided by the results.
UNSMART MEN accept women's excuses to not date, to not call back, whatever. Unsmart men take crap from women.
SMART MEN never take crap from a woman. Ever. He will toss the woman with the trash.
UNSMART MEN perpetually complain about their life and lack of success with women.
SMART MEN take action.
The Inspector
[This message has been edited by Inspector Clouseau (edited 01-08-2002).]
SMART MEN know competition always exists until the woman begs him for exclusivity. Even then, he knows the battle is never completely won.
UNSMART MEN believe in destiny and fate.
SMART MEN knows nothing happens on purpose and he must be the one who actively takes steps to create the life he desires, leaving nothing to chance. Smart men know if nothing is done, nothing will happen.
UNSMART MEN wish and hope for a woman to approach him or ask him out.
SMART MEN do not live in dreams.
UNSMART MEN wish he was born a woman.
SMART MEN love being a man. Smart men don't obsess over his body, he doesn't need others to know what's good or bad, he doesn't backstab his friends, he pursues what he wants over what pursues him. Smart men lead life, not let life lead him. Why, smart men wonder, would anyone want it any other way?
UNSMART MEN think a HB is out of his league.
SMART MEN know no woman is out of his reach; it's only a question whether he is out of her reach.
UNSMART MEN only pursue one women at a time.
SMART MEN know life's a numbers game, where every "no" is one less until a "yes," and to spread himself out thin for maximum chance of success. If he hedges all bets on one woman, and such success with such woman falls through, he is left in a basement crater.
UNSMART MEN pursue that one "special" woman, disregarding all other women.
SMART MEN knows the "special" woman doesn't exist, yet simultaneously knows all women have potential to be special.
UNSMART MEN believe in a "soulmate."
SMART MEN know potentially thousands if not millions of women are potential "soulmates." There is no "The One." Smart men know "soulmates" is only another way to describe compatibility, which isn't mystical to find.
UNSMART MEN go for relationship first, sex second.
SMART MEN know to go for sex first, then if he wants relationship second; he knows going for a committed relationship first will only bastardize the chances of getting the girl. Smart men know before sex women look for reasons to ditch a guy, but after sex women look for reasons to keep the guy. Smart men know people inherently resist change in their life, even change for the better.
UNSMART MEN listen to women.
SMART MEN do not believe what a woman says, rather he is guided by her actions, for actions speak louder than words and it's common for a woman's words to contradict her actions. Smart men listen to women, but only take stock in what women say if supported by action.
UNSMART MEN act like women by following women's standard's of male behavior.
SMART MEN follow successful fellow MEN'S standards of action, and consequently act like a MEN. Men should act like men, women like women. Follow?
UNSMART MEN think women want nice guys.
SMART MEN know women do not want a teddy bear, a chump, which is what most nice guys are -- all cute, snuggly, safe, nonsexual, and inanimate... but what if that sweet teddy bear tried to make a move and grope her? Smart men know what women really want is a REAL MAN -- everything positive about a "nice guy," except with confidence, decisiveness, sexuality -- not some boy.
UNSMART MEN consider women goddesses.
SMART MEN don't put women on a pedestal. Smart men know they are the great catch, whose attention and interest is to be won, not vice versa. Smart men revolve their life around their life, not around women; smart men know by asking a woman out, he's inviting her into his world, not vice versa, and if she rejects it's her loss, not his.
UNSMART MEN treat women like queens.
SMART MEN know the economic law of Marginal Diminishing Utilities; the more you get something, the less it means to you. Smart men know the less you give a woman, the more she gives you. Smart men know the more he gives a woman, the higher the bar of required maintenance; smart men know women will eventually need more to sustain her current level of happiness. Smart men know it's best to leave a woman on her toes guessing what happens next.
UNSMART MEN consider women as "delicate flowers, to be cared for, caressed, watered;" and unsmart men treat women as such (read: treat a woman non-sexually).
SMART MEN know women are sexual creatures, and treat them as such. Smart men respect a woman, but while there's more to women than just sex, bottom line women are about sex. Smart men know they must show sexual interest upfront -- without coming off as only about sex; failing that he will make her feel he finds her a turn off, that he's essentially non-sexual (read: chump); a FRIEND.
UNSMART MEN verbally express their emotions.
SMART MEN express through action. Smart men also know expressing feelings, before the woman expresses hers, is equal to death. Smart men know never emotionally invest in a woman more than she invests in him.
UNSMART MEN think by befriending a woman, the closer he achieves to bedding her.
SMART MEN knows such is hogwash; it's best he spend the least amount of time with her as possible before dating her, before banging her. Smart men know melting her ice shields is accomplished by flirting, not by becoming friends (flirting=potential lovers, friends=FRIENDS=DEATH). Smart men know not to talk about his problems or shortcomings -- always keep conversation light and positive, and not allow himself play role of a woman's emotional tampon, soaking up all her problems. Smart men know before sex women look for reasons to ditch a guy, but after sex women look for reasons to keep the guy.
UNSMART MEN think nice guys finish last.
SMART MEN know chumps never finish. Chumps, in time, get married only because the wife couldn't find a better man and doesn't actually love him.
UNSMART MEN complain about high maintenance women.
SMART MEN know while superficial and materialistic women are problematic, all women have some aspect of high maintenance, whether it be issues of time, money, opinions, wanting kids, etc. Smart men also know there are high maintenance men.
UNSMART MEN complain about golddiggers.
SMART MEN know at heart all women, ultimately, are golddiggers. All women naturally want the best for her now and future family, she wants the most economically comfortable life to raise her family in. Even if she doesn't want kids, she will still seek out the best husband she can find. Smart men know it's only a matter of how accepting the woman is of his shortcomings.
UNSMART MEN keep unrealistically high standards, looking for that "truly great, rare women."
SMART MEN keep their standards open-minded, flexible. Smart men know they must tread through quantity to find quality, and along the way they will find surprises. The great woman is not so rare after all.
UNSMART MEN think in terms of black-and-white, good and bad.
SMART MEN know there are four types of women: sheeps, foxes, foxes dressed as sheeps, sheeps dressed as foxes.
UNSMART MEN think being seen with a woman lowers his chances with other women.
SMART MEN know being seen with women multiplies by some great number his chances in attracting other women. Smart men know to go shopping with female friends.
UNSMART MEN believe a woman when she says she'll call sometime.
SMART MEN know never ever expect a woman to initiate a phone call, at least during the early dating stages. Ever. The exceptions are so rare as to be practically non-existent.
UNSMART MEN wonder "What if she has a boyfriend?"/"Does she like me?"
SMART MEN eliminate such questions from their vocabulary. They make moves and are guided by the results.
UNSMART MEN accept women's excuses to not date, to not call back, whatever. Unsmart men take crap from women.
SMART MEN never take crap from a woman. Ever. He will toss the woman with the trash.
UNSMART MEN perpetually complain about their life and lack of success with women.
SMART MEN take action.
The Inspector
[This message has been edited by Inspector Clouseau (edited 01-08-2002).]
