Sleeping with women who have boyfriends, is it wrong?

tomwesten27

Don Juan
Joined
Aug 8, 2013
Messages
72
Reaction score
0
If you come across a woman who currently has a boyfriend who she has been dating for a long time but seems like she is giving you signs, do you make a move? Or is it wrong as a DJ to even pursue it knowing she is with someone? For the record I don't mean a friends girlfriend or something like that, I mean specifically a scenario like mine where she is visiting from out of town, and you never met the guy she is dating and probably never will.

(To make the story as short and simple as possible I am going to lay it out in quick bullets)

-Roommate tells me his female friend of 8 years is visiting from London and will be crashing at our place for a few days.
-Girl arrives early and my roommate isn't home from work yet so I let her in and we get talking.
-Girl and I end up going down the street to a bar and get drunk because roommate is not off work yet
-I find out girl has a 5 year long BF that lives in London but she is not really happy with the relationship.
-We get back to my apartment and me, my roommate, and some people are drinking in the living room. Girl is being very flirty towards me.
-Time to sleep and girl notices my bed is memory foam and says "I want to sleep in this bed!" I agree to share so she jumps in my bed, lifts my covers and says "come join me! lets cuddle!"
-Girl puts her arm around me and cuddles while saying drunk stuff for a good 10 minutes.
-Girl after 10 minutes jumps out of bed and says "Tomorrow I am sleeping in this bed, but I gotta spend time with my best friend in the other room tonight!" meaning my roommate who she is good friends with.

Long story short the girl is visiting from London. I just met her last night for the first time. She seems to be into me. But she has a BF of 5 years. She already tried cuddling with me. She wants to sleep in my bed tonight...

If that happens tonight, is it a BAD idea to try and make a move? If she just being a flirty drunk??

I DO NOT want to be that guy who tried making a move on my roommates friend knowing she has a BF, and knowing she is just visiting. My roommate also has never hooked up with her.

she is also hot. Advice please guys!!
 

FairShake

Master Don Juan
Joined
Oct 8, 2008
Messages
2,426
Reaction score
307
Of course it's WRONG. It's not the wrongest thing ever but it's still wrong. If you were the boyfriend of 5 years would you honestly feel the guy wasn't wrong. I can't say that I would, I'd be angry with both of them.

But if you're asking I don't think you really give a sh!t so if you want a stranger's permission I say have at it.
 

AttackFormation

Master Don Juan
Joined
Apr 2, 2014
Messages
4,124
Reaction score
3,663
Age
31
Location
Sweden
I'd say it's only "wrong" as long as you don't let the person who got cheated on know. If some girl wants to cheat on her boyfriend with you then you imo have a duty to forward that to her boyfriend if you can, especially if she goes through with it but even if not. Citing Rollo, the medium is the message - if she wants to cheat with you then her relationship is already messed up no matter whether she actually cheats or not.

I don't think going for girls who are already happy with their guy and then trying to seduce them is fine however.
 

Maximus Rex

Banned
Joined
Apr 8, 2005
Messages
2,270
Reaction score
445
Location
Villa Regis
You're Directing Your At the Wrong Person

FairShake said:
Of course it's WRONG. It's not the wrongest thing ever but it's still wrong. If you were the boyfriend of 5 years would you honestly feel the guy wasn't wrong. I can't say that I would, I'd be angry with both of them.[
Not for nothing, this is some beta male thinking and you're placing blame on everybody except for one person, namely yourself. If a some dude is able to come and "take," your broad, you can kinda sorta blame the chick, (because of their capricious and emotional natures,) but at the end of the day your game was lacking. There are plenty of woman who believe in fidelity (and taking a different take on the Celebrity Theory,) even if Channing Tatum or Hugh Jackman were to try and holla, they would honor the commitment to their boyfriends.

However, how are you going to blame the next dude for having tighter game than you? He hollered something your chick wanted hear and at the end she liked his game and chose him. Instead in being butthurt and emotional, find the failings in your game and tighten your sh*t up.
 

RedScorpion

Senior Don Juan
Joined
Jul 23, 2012
Messages
418
Reaction score
218
Age
37
It's good that you don't know this girl's bf personally. It makes it 'better', if not still wrong on some level. If it's her that's pushing for the cheating, then the onus is on her. So under those circumstances... sure. If you can deal with it inside yourself as well.

The other thing is reputation. I don't know how close your roommate is with this girl, or how he'll react. I say this because guys who 'take' another guy's girlfriend can be considered scum - but the outlier to this, is you don't know this guy at all. Which is considerably better. I've had to stay away/not accept this girl's motions towards me, because she was with one of my good friends, and if anything happened between us, the impact would be huge socially. In the back of my head, yes, I kind of wish it happened, it would have been fun to take it up - but logically, not worth it for a quick lay. And definitely not to betray my friend. If she was single - hell yes. She wasn't. But, like I said - you have no obligations to her bf, you don't even know him. Just consider everything.

I'll add too - if you do end up doing something with her - never date her. Guaranteed to cheat later.
 

Jaylan

Master Don Juan
Joined
Jun 8, 2011
Messages
3,121
Reaction score
133
Maximus Rex said:
Not for nothing, this is some beta male thinking and you're placing blame on everybody except for one person, namely yourself. If a some dude is able to come and "take," your broad, you can kinda sorta blame the chick, (because of their capricious and emotional natures,) but at the end of the day your game was lacking. There are plenty of woman who believe in fidelity (and taking a different take on the Celebrity Theory,) even if Channing Tatum or Hugh Jackman were to try and holla, they would honor the commitment to their boyfriends.

However, how are you going to blame the next dude for having tighter game than you? He hollered something your chick wanted hear and at the end she liked his game and chose him. Instead in being butthurt and emotional, find the failings in your game and tighten your sh*t up.
Who gives a fvk about game here? Low quality behavior (like lies and cheating) is low quality behavior. The tightest game in the world from the most high quality man cannot stop some low quality broads from acting like the low quality chicks they are. Stop making excuses for the lower tier of the quality hierarchy.

Now its bad for a guy to cast blame on a man and a woman for disrespecting him? Get out with that garbage I say. Its clear you are the type of guy to go getting sloppy seconds from taken women, but dont try to shame a guy because he takes exception to this behavior. Theres nothing beta about calling out trifling behavior.

I tell chicks straight up that I want to call things off if I become interested in someone else. No need for me to cheat. And I dont run up and get involved in someone elses relationship either. I wonder how beta youd call dudes who kick someones ass for just looking at his girl, let alone touching her. His complaints arent so beta when hes knocking teeth in. So lets not be foolish and call someone "beta" just because they take issue with sh!t behavior.
 

tomwesten27

Don Juan
Joined
Aug 8, 2013
Messages
72
Reaction score
0
I am asking this because I am young and new to the game. I am surprised how many women have boyfriends and are yet SO flirty, touchy, etc. When there boyfriend isn't around. Attention seekers if you will.

I mean she was cuddling with me. A guy she met 5 hours prior to that.

She was drunk flashing her ass in her thong while laughing, talking about how she has no gag reflex...

I am VERY comfortable with talking about anything so it doesn't bother me but to think she has a BF that is back home...

Is she just not a good quality girl or is this regular female drunk behavior??
 

AttackFormation

Master Don Juan
Joined
Apr 2, 2014
Messages
4,124
Reaction score
3,663
Age
31
Location
Sweden
tomwesten27 said:
I am asking this because I am young and new to the game. I am surprised how many women have boyfriends and are yet SO flirty, touchy, etc. When there boyfriend isn't around. Attention seekers if you will.

I mean she was cuddling with me. A guy she met 5 hours prior to that.

She was drunk flashing her ass in her thong while laughing, talking about how she has no gag reflex...

I am VERY comfortable with talking about anything so it doesn't bother me but to think she has a BF that is back home...

Is she just not a good quality girl or is this regular female drunk behavior??
This is called branch swinging. A monkey isn't gonna let go of the branch it's holding before it finds another one to grab onto. It wouldn't always be her searching for an upgrade, it could just be something like she's grown up to be like this or she knows none of the guys she gets with at this point of her life are likely to really lead somewhere, etc.
 

slikkmeister

Don Juan
Joined
Jul 3, 2013
Messages
59
Reaction score
3
Funny how all the moralist have to jump in with their high and mighty garbage. Jesus Herald Christ, this is a ****ing site to learn how to smash chicks. Homosexuals like J will tell you a girls low quality....WHY? Because she wants to have sex? She has a BF? Who cares??? Maybe he's a loser, or can't get it up or a closet homo like half the people on here.... Smash her and send her home with a big smile on her face!!!! **** what all these serial posters on here think about it. One of my plates has a BF for 3 years... Do I care? No, I'm not about to marry her. She's just a plate... Her BF don't take care of business and I do. Guess that makes me low-quality? Like I would give a **** anyway. Life's too short!!!!
 

ovoxo

Don Juan
Joined
Apr 7, 2012
Messages
47
Reaction score
2
tomwesten27 said:
I am asking this because I am young and new to the game. I am surprised how many women have boyfriends and are yet SO flirty, touchy, etc. When there boyfriend isn't around. Attention seekers if you will.

I mean she was cuddling with me. A guy she met 5 hours prior to that.

She was drunk flashing her ass in her thong while laughing, talking about how she has no gag reflex...

I am VERY comfortable with talking about anything so it doesn't bother me but to think she has a BF that is back home...

Is she just not a good quality girl or is this regular female drunk behavior??
90% chance she's cheated before.

Probably bored in her current relationship and has been for a while. Your call on whether to smash or not.
 

FairShake

Master Don Juan
Joined
Oct 8, 2008
Messages
2,426
Reaction score
307
Maximus Rex said:
Not for nothing, this is some beta male thinking and you're placing blame on everybody except for one person, namely yourself.
Well I guess I'm a beta then because your post seemed like bro wankery to me.

I guess I think any guy who would blame HIMSELF because his woman cheated on him with some dude is the portrait of doormat, low self-esteem, betatude. He's bypassing the first two suspects and focusing on the third because he blames himself over his own sh!tty life.
 

El Payaso

Master Don Juan
Joined
Jan 16, 2014
Messages
3,637
Reaction score
2,638
It's definitely wrong to me but I've been here long enough to know that not everyone here has the same moral compass.
 

GS750

Master Don Juan
Joined
Aug 28, 2013
Messages
1,565
Reaction score
192
Personally, I don't mess with girls with boyfriends. It's not really a morality thing, guys do it, whatever. I don't judge...good for them. I don't do it.
 

SomeGirls

Don Juan
Joined
Mar 14, 2014
Messages
11
Reaction score
0
She is going to mess around with someone regardless. She more than likely already has. Smash and dash
 

Jaylan

Master Don Juan
Joined
Jun 8, 2011
Messages
3,121
Reaction score
133
slikkmeister said:
Funny how all the moralist have to jump in with their high and mighty garbage. Jesus Herald Christ, this is a ****ing site to learn how to smash chicks. Homosexuals like J will tell you a girls low quality....WHY? Because she wants to have sex? She has a BF? Who cares??? Maybe he's a loser, or can't get it up or a closet homo like half the people on here.... Smash her and send her home with a big smile on her face!!!! **** what all these serial posters on here think about it. One of my plates has a BF for 3 years... Do I care? No, I'm not about to marry her. She's just a plate... Her BF don't take care of business and I do. Guess that makes me low-quality? Like I would give a **** anyway. Life's too short!!!!
What a clown.

So slutty behavior like screwing more than 1 guy at a time while in a relationship is not low quality? And any man who takes issue with low quality behavior is just weak or a homo right?

Thanks for contributing to the thread with such a sh!te post. Youre the kind of dude I actually smile about ending up in the hospital when bfs and spouses go berserk. Enjoy your sloppy seconds and thirds from low quality smuts
 

TheBossman

Don Juan
Joined
Oct 17, 2013
Messages
52
Reaction score
8
I guess some people have a code and ethics.

If someone comes up and bashes your head in with a bat and steals your car.. must have meant you were a Beta and deserved it. If you're not strong enough to keep your stuff, than you deserve to have it taken from you.

It seems like alot scumbag behavior is classified as "alpha".

Don't be surprised when you steal the girl and the old boyfriend shows up with a shotgun and blows your f'n legs off.
 

tomwesten27

Don Juan
Joined
Aug 8, 2013
Messages
72
Reaction score
0
I get what you all are saying. Personally I never had a good feeling about messing around with a girl that has a boyfriend. There are plenty of single girls to have a good lay with.

My only thought was when I am drunk, and she is drunk, and she wants to cuddle and all of sudden she is in my bed its takes REAL RESTRAINT to not do anything..

I am better off not even allowing the sleeping in my bed then huh?

Should the sentence "I have a boyfriend" be an immediate drop and move to the next?
 

GS750

Master Don Juan
Joined
Aug 28, 2013
Messages
1,565
Reaction score
192
TheBossman said:
I guess some people have a code and ethics.

If someone comes up and bashes your head in with a bat and steals your car.. must have meant you were a Beta and deserved it. If you're not strong enough to keep your stuff, than you deserve to have it taken from you.

It seems like alot scumbag behavior is classified as "alpha".

Don't be surprised when you steal the girl and the old boyfriend shows up with a shotgun and blows your f'n legs off.
This is the way I see it. You don't know what is going on in someone's head. You don't know what he's likely to do if he finds out. Best to just avoid any of that BS and just avoid the girls with serious boyfriends. That's my .02.
 
Top