Single Mom Lets It Be Known "Her Kids Come First"

[DJVision]

I see. So instead of communicating like an adult with her, and instead of rational rebuttal to the post I made (which takes into account input from other thread participants in addition) you have no rebuttal or sensible response, and you resort to ad hominem attacks and name calling.

Its all there for everyone to read. Thank you for illustrating my point beautifully.

I communicate nicely with her at all times, because even with a few flaws, she is actually a nice person most of the time.

The reason why your getting this type of communication from me is, because you put together a bunch of horse chit analysis using some ESP powers where you know what my girl looks like and how hot she is...

Sorry but when talk out of your azz like clearly you are.. Don't expect a bunch of flowers and a box full of chocolate nicetys.

You going to slang chit, expect to get some thrown back... Time for YOU to grow up!

 

[BackInTheGame78]

Huh have you been smoking crack @BeExcellent ? I would strongly advise you to put the pipe down, as your analysis reads like a drunk crackhead put this together.

She is at best average looking and doesn't have a great body. I have had much hotter girls in the past.

Trust me I like her character, but looks wise I have done way better, my ex prior to this one was ages 29.. Even then my ego didn't care much, I judged her on her behaviour not her looks.

By the way don't let my age fool you. I'm heavily into fitness and in really good shape and looks wise, don't look a day older than 35.. You might look like dawg zhit, but I honestly don't.

If you want, I can provide you with a contact for drugs rehabilitation? Because your totally OFF analysis only a coked out junkie could possibly put together lol

Nice try though.. it's amazing how through the screen of your phone you managed to see how hot the girls body is and her beautiful ego boosting looks? You certainly have some awesome, almost ESP powers @BeExcellent

Could you possibly also use your insane powers, and tell me how empty or full my Ballz are right now??

Well if she is average looking and doesn't have a nice body then why are you wasting your time?

Obviously you need to be the center of attention with a woman, you know she isn't able to provide that for you but yet you still remain.

Why?

Go find yourself someone better. Unless you feel this is the best you can do and then I guess you probably need to work on some things yourself because you should be able to improve on that.

 

[DJVision]

Well if she is average looking and doesn't have a nice body then why are you wasting your time?

Obviously you need to be the center of attention with a woman, you know she isn't able to provide that for you but yet you still remain.

Why?

Go find yourself someone better. Unless you feel this is the best you can do and then I guess you probably need to work on some things yourself because you should be able to improve on that.

I have had several hot chicks in the past.. I don't select females based on looks these days. I would rather have a 6 if she is of good character.

 

[New_Journey]

I see. So instead of communicating like an adult with her, and instead of rational rebuttal to the post I made (which takes into account input from other thread participants in addition) you have no rebuttal or sensible response, and you resort to ad hominem attacks and name calling.

Its all there for everyone to read. Thank you for illustrating my point beautifully.

Would you date a guy like this retard?

 

[BeExcellent]

As far as my looks, see my avatar. That's me. In my 50s. Unfiltered, unretouched "proof" which I find sort of ironic. That's after 3 children and no surgical enhancements whatsoever. My real hair. I look better n a bikini than many women half my age. So I'm good, lol.

What doesn't add up is why are you with her then? Why make this thread? If her looks aren't the draw, you resent her clarifying her obvious obligation/responsibility, you want kids and she won't have more? Something just doesn't make sense.

I totally agree with @Clockwerk50 about covert contracts. You set yourself up for frustration and disappointment when you fail to communicate your expectations and then get upset when those expectations are not met. This is also completely frustrating to the other person, who undoubtedly failed Mindreading 101.

You are a classic example of "Nice Guy Syndrome". You see, nice guys are actually not nice. They work by covert contract and are transactional (this for that) in relationships. You stated you have Looks, Money, and Status (LMS). You expect her to reward your percieved sacrifices because you bring LMS in exchange for attention/priority/sex/availability etc.

Its a good lesson for the men here. Do not be the proverbial "Nice Guy" with uncommunicated covert expectations. Its not nice at all.

 

[BeExcellent]

Would you date a guy like this retard?

Nope. I'll keep my handsome "Bad boy" thank you very much.

 

[Barrister]

This board gets someone like OP about every 6-8 months. New poster who shows up with a question about a girl he’s struggling with. He doesn’t like the feedback he gets, then calls everyone who he posed the question to idiots and tries to impress them with his supposed prowess with women to dispute their advice (despite being the one having the problem).

Some things never change.

 

[DJ Novice]

Having had children myself it’s natural for any parent to put their kids first at least up until the high school years when the hormones kick in, they are more independent and they no longer want to hang around you. As a parent you want to get the most out of the time you have with them when they’re young.

If you are dating a single mum with kids still in primary school then she will still need to put her kids first a lot of the time. If this bothers you, then date someone with older or no kids or just keep it casual until her kids hit high school.

 

[plumber]

who would want a woman for more than a day, that does not priority her kids? that would be a RED flag.

 

[Chow Mein]

OP,

Read through this thread carefully, along with your own responses. You have not understood women, their priorities, nor where you fit. You expect something that you haven’t deserved, especially from someone who has more responsibility than yourself. You’re very rigid, that’s fine. If you expect that someone rarely come by and will do, then you shouldn’t be dealing with single moms. You act like you’re the only one in her life, somewhat like the toddlers she has to take care of.

 

[DJVision]

@BeExcellent and some other posters on here, especially the more older long term members of SS really do come across as dvumb assez to me, and I will tell you why.

First of all, we are all adults here, and we all understand basic concepts, such as a mother's priority should be her child, this is non negotiable.. I get it.. We all get it..

However there is a big difference between two grown adults instinctively knowing this, and one of the adults intentionally VERBALISING it whenever it suits her.

The problem with the low IQ types like
@BeExcellent and several other Clownz on here is, you simply are too silly to understand that SOME THINGS ARE UNDERSTOOD, AND BETTER OFF NOT SAID OUT ALOUD.

Infact single mothers are hurting themselves by repeatedly reminding men "MY KIDS WILL ALWAYS COME FIRST"

Think about this dynamic.. Your a single man, who doesn't have children, has a good career, finances in check, physically in good shape..

If a man takes a Risk/Chance by dating a single mom, he more likely will end up making most of the Sacrifices in the relationship. His time, energy, finances, the loss of of the normal girlfriend experience, maybe even losing the ability to start his own family period.

If the man is making most of the sacrifices, how does it benefit the single mom, to REMIND him every few months, that he isn't a priority and will always come third or fourth in the scheme of things?

Her happiness
Her kids
Her family
Her dog and cat
Her best friend

I get it.. So it should be that way.. But reminding the person who who makes the biggest sacrifice of the IMBALANCE of the relationship, only makes the person who is making the sacrifices (the man) think to himself, why the hell am I doing all this for her?

Therefore when single moms verbalise and tell you blatantly that your not a priority, they are infact hurting themselves.

Take my experience recently.. Do I feel it is wrong for this woman to prioritise her children? ABSOLUTELY NOT.. However her Reminding me verbally has only made me realise that I can and SHOULD do BETTER than this.. Therefore I no longer will put myself out of the way for her, and more likely will end the relationship, where I can give my all to a woman, who doesn't keep throwing things in my face.

I am not trying to be selective about the advice that is given to me. I didn't sign up to anything on here, that suggested that I MUST TAKE ON BOARD YOUR ADVICE.

Frankly some of you on here, come across as dvumb assez who don't even read the initial post properly, you jump to extremes and throw out over the top stoopided analysis.

Your garbage advice will obviously be ignored or at least challenged.

However some people on here have approached the matter maturely and thoughtfully so I thank those guys.

 

[Chow Mein]

@BeExcellent and some other posters on here, especially the more older long term members of SS really do come across as dvumb assez to me, and I will tell you why.

First of all, we are all adults here, and we all understand basic concepts, such as a mother's priority should be her child, this is non negotiable.. I get it.. We all get it..

However there is a big difference between two grown adults instinctively instinctively knowing this, and one of the adults intentionally VERBALISING it whenever it suits her.

The problem with the low IQ types like
@BeExcellent and several other Clownz on here is, you simply are too silly to understand that SOME THINGS ARE UNDERSTOOD AND NOT SAID OUT ALOUD

Infact single mothers are hurting themselves by repeatedly reminding men "MY KIDS WILL ALWAYS COME FIRST"

Think about this dynamic.. Your a single man, who doesn't have children, has a good career, finances in check, physically in good shape..

If a man takes a Risk/Chance by dating a single mom, he more likely will end up making most of the Sacrifices in the relationship. His time, energy, finances, the loss of of the normal girlfriend experience, maybe even losing the ability to start his own family period.

If the man is making most of the sacrifices, how does it benefit the single mom, to REMIND him every few months, that he isn't a priority and will always come third or fourth in the scheme of things?

Her happiness
Her kids
Her family
Her dog and cat.

I get it.. So it should be that way.. But reminding the person who who makes the biggest sacrifice of the IMBALANCE of the relationship, only makes the person who is making the sacrifices (the man) why the hell am I doing all this for her?

Therefore when single moms verbalise and tell you blatantly you blatantly your not a priority, they are infact hurting themselves.

Take my experience recently.. Do I feel it is wrong for this woman to prioritise her children? ABSOLUTELY NOT.. However her Reminding me verbally has only made me realise that I can and SHOULD do BETTER than this.. Therefore I no longer will put myself out of the way for her, and more likely will end the relationship, where I can give my all to a woman, who doesn't keep throwing things in my face.

I am not trying to be selective about the advice that is given to me. I didn't sign up to anything on here, that suggested that I MUST TAKE ON BOARD YOUR ADVICE.

Frankly some of you on here, come across as dvumb assez who don't even read the initial post properly, you jump to extremes and throw out over the top stoopided analysis.

When some advice reads totally illogical to me, I simply refuse to take it on board. However some people on here have approached the matter maturely and thoatfullly so I thank those guys.

You think the world should revolve around you, without having any perspective on what others feel. No wonder your girl de-prioritized you.

 

[DJVision]

You think the world should revolve around you, without having any perspective on what others feel. No wonder your girl de-prioritized you.

You're such a dvmb azz bro. I make all the sacrifices in the situation and I think the world rotates around me.

Go back to sleep you clown.. you don't even make any sense. By any chance your not related to @BeExcellent are you?

Because you both make wild assumptions and come across as angry bitter children to me.

 

[Chow Mein]

You're such a dvmb azz bro. I make all the sacrifices in the situation and I think the world rotates around me.

Go back to sleep you clown.. you don't even make any sense. By any chance your not related to @BeExcellent are you?

Because you both make wild assumptions and come across as angry bitter children to me.

For you to learn to bypass profanity filters makes me believe you are a long time troll.

 

[DJVision]

For you to learn to bypass profanity filters makes me believe you are a long time troll.

Well thought out logic my friend, that's a really good argument you made.

 

[Gamisch]

Huh have you been smoking crack @BeExcellent ? I would strongly advise you to put the pipe down, as your analysis reads like a drunk crackhead put this together.

She is at best average looking and doesn't have a great body. I have had much hotter girls in the past.

Trust me I like her character, but looks wise I have done way better, my ex prior to this one was ages 29.. Even then my ego didn't care much, I judged her on her behaviour not her looks.

By the way don't let my age fool you. I'm heavily into fitness and in really good shape and looks wise, don't look a day older than 35.. You might look like dawg zhit, but I honestly don't.

If you want, I can provide you with a contact for drugs rehabilitation? Because your totally OFF analysis only a coked out junkie could possibly put together lol

Nice try though.. it's amazing how through the screen of your phone you managed to see how hot the girls body is and her beautiful ego boosting looks? You certainly have some awesome, almost ESP powers @BeExcellent

Could you possibly also use your insane powers, and tell me how empty or full my Ballz are right now??

Because unlike you, you dumbb retard, her looks are not that important to me..

I also look for good character in a female, not just how hot her azz is you dvmmy.

Go back to the drawing board with your clown world analysis.

Been telling y'all from the get go this man is extremely annoying , pathetic ,disgusting and disrespectful . Coming at Queen B like this..if this was indeed the lockerroom I'd closed the door and tell you " NOW YOUZ CAN'T LEAVE ". You disrespectful piece of garbage, you don't talk to women who are trying to help like that. In my world this does NOT go unpunished...Shows your true nature but Imma watch my words so I don't get banned.

Again you and @BPH are cut from the same cloth. Thread doesn't lie. Bph is a liar, everyone remembers razor Rambo and I even start to think it's just the same dude. Dude makes up his life and 90% starts to see through him. I wonder if BPH has anything to say now. Nope. I'd be embarrassed if I was protecting you only to see you lash out like this. I'd take it all back.

I can't put in words how much you anger me. I normally don't drink but got some shots at new years eve so your post hit twice as hard, just like I would in real life you Muppet.

I see why that woman keeps her kids away from you. Your best use is a human ATM . Lost 100% respect for you with that post boi.

You are 50 and desperately need some life lessons. Street life lessons.

Why don't you just leave.

 

[Gamisch]

As far as my looks, see my avatar. That's me. In my 50s. Unfiltered, unretouched "proof" which I find sort of ironic. That's after 3 children and no surgical enhancements whatsoever. My real hair. I look better n a bikini than many women half my age. So I'm good, lol.

What doesn't add up is why are you with her then? Why make this thread? If her looks aren't the draw, you resent her clarifying her obvious obligation/responsibility, you want kids and she won't have more? Something just doesn't make sense.

I totally agree with @Clockwerk50 about covert contracts. You set yourself up for frustration and disappointment when you fail to communicate your expectations and then get upset when those expectations are not met. This is also completely frustrating to the other person, who undoubtedly failed Mindreading 101.

You are a classic example of "Nice Guy Syndrome". You see, nice guys are actually not nice. They work by covert contract and are transactional (this for that) in relationships. You stated you have Looks, Money, and Status (LMS). You expect her to reward your percieved sacrifices because you bring LMS in exchange for attention/priority/sex/availability etc.

Its a good lesson for the men here. Do not be the proverbial "Nice Guy" with uncommunicated covert expectations. Its not nice at all.

Not gonna lie but DAMN B , you hot as hell. Never took the time to look at your profile picture. I speak for every man right now.

Call it simping. Don't care. Despite your age I would 100% go for you, you look stunning!!

 

[New_Journey]

I have had several hot chicks in the past..

And then you woke up. The only thing you deserve right know is the ban of your life for being so insolent.

 

[Glassguy]

Her kids are 8 years old and 12 years old.

I totally understand a woman prioritising her kids, but when it's blatantly thrown in my face like that, I can't help but let it bother me.

I'm in a position where I am required to make most of the sacrifices.

01. Not seeing eachother very often due to her kids

02. Not spending New Year together

03.I have to see her when it's most suitable to her, or we can't meet up.

04. She expects me to only see her, and give her a relationship, therefore giving up the opportunity to be with a childless girl.

Feels really of me, to give her all that, just to be told that am not her priority, her kids always will be.

Let me give you some perspective. I raised my daughter, on my own, fro. 6 yrs old to 18yrs old.
She did come first. But I could also make arrangements to get free. Just as the woman you're talkng about in your post.
Another striking thing I noticed- you've been dating her for 9 months and your lives haven't integrated enough that you are around her kids? Seems very odd and something seems off.
I'm not saying people should introduce people to their children right away, but at 9 months you should be seeing her whenever YOURE free and when YOU want.
Seems this chick is pulling all the strings.
I'd simply tell her things aren't working out, this has hit its life span and it's time to find new people.
I've had some really good relationships with single moms. But they all had very good character and didn't act skank like your woman is acting.

You know that you should drop this chick flat on her face. So just do it. There is no reason to miss out on other opportunities that will work while investing another second on this chick.

 

[Glassguy]

@BeExcellent and some other posters on here, especially the more older long term members of SS really do come across as dvumb assez to me, and I will tell you why.

First of all, we are all adults here, and we all understand basic concepts, such as a mother's priority should be her child, this is non negotiable.. I get it.. We all get it..

However there is a big difference between two grown adults instinctively knowing this, and one of the adults intentionally VERBALISING it whenever it suits her.

The problem with the low IQ types like
@BeExcellent and several other Clownz on here is, you simply are too silly to understand that SOME THINGS ARE UNDERSTOOD, AND BETTER OFF NOT SAID OUT ALOUD.

Infact single mothers are hurting themselves by repeatedly reminding men "MY KIDS WILL ALWAYS COME FIRST"

Think about this dynamic.. Your a single man, who doesn't have children, has a good career, finances in check, physically in good shape..

If a man takes a Risk/Chance by dating a single mom, he more likely will end up making most of the Sacrifices in the relationship. His time, energy, finances, the loss of of the normal girlfriend experience, maybe even losing the ability to start his own family period.

If the man is making most of the sacrifices, how does it benefit the single mom, to REMIND him every few months, that he isn't a priority and will always come third or fourth in the scheme of things?

Her happiness
Her kids
Her family
Her dog and cat
Her best friend

I get it.. So it should be that way.. But reminding the person who who makes the biggest sacrifice of the IMBALANCE of the relationship, only makes the person who is making the sacrifices (the man) think to himself, why the hell am I doing all this for her?

Therefore when single moms verbalise and tell you blatantly that your not a priority, they are infact hurting themselves.

Take my experience recently.. Do I feel it is wrong for this woman to prioritise her children? ABSOLUTELY NOT.. However her Reminding me verbally has only made me realise that I can and SHOULD do BETTER than this.. Therefore I no longer will put myself out of the way for her, and more likely will end the relationship, where I can give my all to a woman, who doesn't keep throwing things in my face.

I am not trying to be selective about the advice that is given to me. I didn't sign up to anything on here, that suggested that I MUST TAKE ON BOARD YOUR ADVICE.

Frankly some of you on here, come across as dvumb assez who don't even read the initial post properly, you jump to extremes and throw out over the top stoopided analysis.

Your garbage advice will obviously be ignored or at least challenged.

However some people on here have approached the matter maturely and thoughtfully so I thank those guys.

I will also warn you that name calling is a violation of the rules.

No, the "older people " on SS are not stupid. We usually have experience.
And your mindset is totally off when it comes to women.
Nobody is going to argue that kids shouldn't come first. But you're not even coming in 2nd. Or 3rd. You're getting used my man. And you'd better wake up or this story stays on repeat with the next woman, the one after that and so forth.
A woman with high interest will move mountains to see you. She'd get a babysitter. Like I said previously, at 9 months you'd be seeing her more (if you chose to) by being around her kids (if you choose to)
She's calling all the shots and you're just putting up with it like a beat dog.
This isn't a her problem as much as it is a you problem.
If you don't want good advice, go somewhere else. We aren't here to tell you what you want to hear or stroke your broken ego.