shy or wants to be friends??

[32swf]

I had a third date on Saturday night with a guy I really like. We have a lot in common, get along well, laugh, etc.

After dinner (he drove and paid) I asked him back to my place to watch a movie. He came in, we watched the movie and he went home around 1230. Didn't make any moves on me at all. No hug, no kiss nothing. And didn't on the first two dates either.

I sounds like he's been the passive one in his last several relationships, the women coming after him.

I don't know if he's not attracted to me, or if he's shy and waiting for me to make a move or what.

I'm thinking I'll just wait and see if he calls, but if he's waiting for me to be the agressive one, I think I should ask him over for dinner. Any help???

It's been three weeks now, with all weekend dates. and chatting a few times during the week.

 

[chlywly]

He's shy, if he didnt find you attractive he wouldnt have come over make the move.

 

[MR_PERFECT]

He's shy. If he didn't like you, he would't have come up to watch a movie. Invite him over for dinner and make the first move.

 

[( . )( . )]

yeah hes your run of the mill AFC too scared to make a move from years of being puzzified and femanized.

agree with the others, put the poor sap out of his misery and make the moves.

also on a side note i take it his around your age? why dont you do him a favour and point out this site, his lack of balls and paying for the date show he could do with a little clueing in .

 

[TesuqueRed]

32swf---if he's passive now, wouldn't you expect him to be passive in most things in the future as well? For example--in bed. Or in social situations.

Want that?

I suppose that's why male passivity is (and should be) a red flag for women.

You've done your part by setting up a safe, easy situation for him to make a move. Perhaps you could've (and maybe did) use kino on him.

How many green lights does he need? You could find out, I suppose...

Anyway--the point of this is: do you really want a passive male? Even if you gently take him by the hand, sit him down and explain that it's Ok for him to kiss you and he get's the clue and jumps you--do you really want him? That passive behavior will continue and show up in all other areas.

 

[poonologist]

Originally posted by TesuqueRed
32swf---if he's passive now, wouldn't you expect him to be passive in most things in the future as well? For example--in bed. Or in social situations.

Want that?

I suppose that's why male passivity is (and should be) a red flag for women.

You've done your part by setting up a safe, easy situation for him to make a move. Perhaps you could've (and maybe did) use kino on him.

How many green lights does he need? You could find out, I suppose...

Anyway--the point of this is: do you really want a passive male? Even if you gently take him by the hand, sit him down and explain that it's Ok for him to kiss you and he get's the clue and jumps you--do you really want him? That passive behavior will continue and show up in all other areas.

Some of this is not necessarily true.I for one used to find myself shy in certain situations and even some of those had nothing to do with women.This doesnt mean youre passive.I for one have always been rather aggressive and that goes for in the bed,when people try to take advantage or similar situations.But i was also plagued with shyness early on in my childhood and it continued to a certain point into the teenage yrs.Never have i been labeled a passive person.If someone disrespects me im the first to let them know i dont give a **** who they are,that **** will get them no where with me.I also still tend to be reserved to a certain extent.

This guy might be wanting to do everything right because he likes you so much and fears pushing you away by making moves quickly or before youre ready.If you havent,try getting in closer on dates.Kino also does wonders for letting a guy know and vice versa.But dont kino so much that he begins to wonder if youre just playful as a person and might not actually be into him.There are perfect,opportune times for this and being as youre a woman you should be able to detect those moments rather easily.Basicly i agree with most everything else said here

 

[DJ_Dork]

Well, you already find him sexually attractive, that is why you went out with him. Make the moves.. if he doesn't return or shows awkwardness, DO IT AGAIN. If he says 'STOP/NO/FEELS UNCOMFORTABLE VISUALLY' then he doesn't share your sexual attraction.

 

[( . )( . )]

Originally posted by DJ_Dork
If he says 'STOP/NO/FEELS UNCOMFORTABLE VISUALLY' then he doesn't share your sexual attraction.

polite way of saying hes gay

 

[poonologist]

Originally posted by ( . )( . )
polite way of saying hes gay

Omg that was funny

 

[32swf]

guess he lost interest

so I called him on Tuesday night and left a message saying I remembered he said something about going out of town this coming weekend, and that I'd like to do something Wed or Thursday evening if he was free. And nothing. I haven't heard back from him.

If he's shy, wouldn't it be a good thing if I made things easier for him, by showing that I'm interested??

Now, I feel like he's blowing me off!!! aghh!!!!
I know I'm not very patient, but it's been 4 days since I talked to him. any thoughts???


Also when he was over at my place on Saturday night, he sat with his arms crossed. I don't know if this was defensive because he really didn't want to be there, or if it means he was nervous and reserved. ????

 

[B9]

He's gay.