Shy in front of new people

[k3000]

Im usually a funny and confident person but every time i meet people for the first time I freeze. I just cant be myself for some reason. Its not that i feel inferior because i know that i can hold an intelligent convo and that i can have a laugh with people that I know.

I was bullied a lot in school by the people that i wanted to impress so i think that maybe i have a fear of being myself around people that i want to approve of me.

So...if anyone has any ideas of how to overcome this fear then please let me know. My idea is to join lots of different societies or groups (sports etc.) just for the initial "getting to know everybody" stage.

Feedback much appreciated.

Merry xmas dudes.

 

[G-STATIS]

i used to b the same way but u said that u were funny, use this to ur advantage. when you first meet sum1 for the first time try to say sumthin humorous to break the ice. this may make u feel a little more comfortable and allow people to see what a great person u are.

hope it helps

 

[Reto]

I grew up as a really quiet kid. As an Adult, I am quiet in new or unfamiliar situations/people.

If you're conscious of it, you can work on it. I've found one way to get over my fears is to confront them. Seek them out. By joining different groups, I thnk you're on your way.

But you got to remember, if you don't know these people, it's ok to be quiet. First impressions are lasting impressions.

 

[learningtopimp]

I have the same problem and I am trying to work on it, I think it's just getting out in new social situations and getting to know people.

 

[Runna13=)]

I totally understand what you mean. For me, I'm just a little bit quieter around people I've just met.

Around my junior year in high school was when I changed. I would definitely advise joining some extracurricular activies. Try the whole spectrum, go for a student government position, go out for a sport team, do community service (I was in Key Club, and it was great; fun, social ppl to be around, and you're helping out the world), etc. You'll be able to interact with a range of people: jocks, leadership ppl, intelligent ppl, etc. You'll gain a lot of experience and practice.

Understand that you don't need to impress anyone or have them approve of you. If you show your genuine side, and they don't like it, so be it. Don't try so hard to fit in and don't ever change who you are.

Keep reaffirming to yourself that you're confident, intelligent, funny, and a good person to be around. Never doubt yourself and all will be good.

Hope this helps a lil' and best of luck.

It might take weeks, maybe months, but you will succeed.

 

[chlywly]

Yeah been there done that, mostly was quite in a lot of situations b/c of lots of moving around to new places, not being accepted; lots of racism/cruelty etc... got a temper etc found it hard to open up to new people......

The work starts with you, stop trying to impress people and just be happy with yourself, doesn't matter what others think of you, poorly or well Just be the best that you can be, merry christmas and things will change don't worry, just keep up effort.

 

[Runna13=)]

First impressions are lasting impressions.

I totally disagree. First impressions are a b****. A lot of people may see you as one way at first, but when they gradually see your true side, this is what they will remember.

A lot of the girls that I dated senior year in high school said they were intimidated by me the prior 3 years. They saw me as overly ****y and somewhat unapproachable. When I let down my defense and this facade I was showing, and started actually talking to them and showing them my true self, then they started to fall for me.

Let down the guard that you put up and show people the real you.

First impressions suck like f*** but they never last.

 

[PuertoRican_Lover]

QUOTE]Originally posted by k3000
Im usually a funny and confident person but every time i meet people for the first time I freeze


Maybe it is because you are always meeting them in the freezer!

 

[PuertoRican_Lover]

It's kinda of a corny joke, I know.

 

[Reto]

Originally posted by chlywly
The work starts with you, stop trying to impress people and just be happy with yourself, doesn't matter what others think of you, poorly or well Just be the best that you can be, merry christmas and things will change don't worry, just keep up effort.

So true.

 

[k3000]

Thanks for the support dudes.

I think Im going to set myself some challenges aswell as to overcome fears and create some new good habits, just working on one thing at a time.

ps. No offence but that joke was ****e peurtorican_lover. LOL.