Should I call this girl out?

[TheFixer14]

So, let's start from the top,

I went on a camping trip in June and met this young ladyl. She was great and kinda initiated things. She looked good, she was fun, she was smart (biochemical engineer major at a great school) and we were both into anime. I've dated girls who looked good, were, fun, smart and into anime. But there was something about her that stood out just a little bit more than the others.

Anyway, we were supposed to hang out that morning after However, I ended up ****ing another woman all night long and woke up late. I did see her that next day, she gave a melancholy hug and I didn't really see her for the rest of the trip.

We ended up going out twice. The second time is where I ****ed up hard. You see, this was a weird period of my life. I had just realized that I had some mental health issues (bipolar 2) and was just addressing them. I'm fine now and don't even take meds. But, at the time I was pretty unstable.

So, that night we were in the club and she basically tested me by dancing with another guy right in front of me. To be fair, that I was pretty in my head from the start. One thing lead to another, I got mad and left her at the club.

**** move. Never do this unless she starts making out with the guy.

The next day I was filled with regret and texted her back. I could tell that she was upset. But, she was pretty mature about it and I told her that I'd make it up to her.

And then I displayed more bad behavior.

I tried to get out to come out and she was actually going to Vegas. I ****ed up, thinking that I needed to get her back out now and tried to reschedule, she said that she's hit me up when she got back.

Got nothing.

After a few weeks I texted her a lame text and heard nothing. I decided to just move on.

Late December, I'd had been threw some hard times. They were at their end. But, I had tremendous inner growth. I had dated other women, but none of them made me as happy as she did.

So, I texted her in a "what the hell" kind of way. I apologized and just kinda smoothed things over. I didn't even think that she would respond back.

She ended up texting me that night. She was like "it's okay, you don't need to do anything." But, once I said that I wanted to do something, she opened up again. We both told each other how we enjoyed hanging out. We texted a bit for a few days and she agreed to go out after a family vacation. So, I set up a date.

Got no response for over a week.

I'm telling you guys, I was heartbroken. I learned a **** ton from that. But damn, I was starting to realize that I did love her. Even though I began dating this woman who goes to college in Vancoucer that I met while she was on vacation (I'm in L.A), I was still into this girl.

She texted me back a week later blaming bad connection and asking how I was. I said "Hey, no worries, how was the trip? Go anywhere exciting?"

Have yet to have gotten a text back yet.

Now, I have an idea of what's going on. I'm simply not a priority. Clearly, there is still interest. If there wasn't she would have never texted me back. But, after what I've done, I'm not a priority. If her interest was at a 9 when we first started dating, then it's at a 7 or 6 now.

I feel like this is all one big test. I just have a feel that she will hit me up. But, she is at the moment, **** buddy material. I'm not really into relationships, but she certainly isn't displaying girlfriend material qualities.

At the moment the approach I am taking with this is take it or leave it. I'm not going to chase her. If she doesn't text me back, fine. On a sexual level, I've been with women who are hotter than her. And, most importantly, I am building myself back up after a tough few months. I'm working on a project, got offered a lead role in a film, getting some cool auditions, working on my craft, working on some business ideas and just trying to live my life to the fullest.

But, I can't lie, part of me is still into her. I would like to see her again. Maybe it's just my ego being mad over the missed opportunity in the summer.

Should I text her, calling her out on her bad behavior? Is there anything else I can do this help this along?

 

[dustmuffin]

Didn't read all of it. She has low interest. Stop wasting your time. Move along and find girls that want to be with you.

 

[hockeyfreak79]

I think you have over inflated her interest level. You say it's a 6/7 when in reality it sounds like a 2. She's not even responding to your texts man! And she's done that 2x, time to take the hint. Sounds like she's thrown you into orbiter status, did you even fück her cause your op isn't very clear...

If you did just accept this was ONS/fling and move on.

 

[RangerMIke]

Get to the point..... your wall of text makes you sound like a chick.

Low interest move on... never call out chicks, don't waste your time, just fvcking ignore them.

 

[TheFixer14]

Didn't read all of it. She has low interest. Stop wasting your time. Move along and find girls that want to be with you.

Perhaps you should have read it all .

Sure, I could just go out and have some "fun." But, at this point in my life, I am passed that. I've tried going out lately, but have been so f**king bored and left within an hour.

I did meet this girl who treats me a lot better than this chick and is better looking. But, she was on vacation and goes to school in Vancouver, so we are limited to texting until I go an visit her in a few months. I guess while I don't want a relationship, want women who I can have intimacy with. If anything is holding me back it's that I am not sure if I can have that level of intimacy (not sexual) with any other woman except the Vancouver chick, maybe.

I think you have over inflated her interest level. You say it's a 6/7 when in reality it sounds like a 2. She's not even responding to your texts man! And she's done that 2x, time to take the hint. Sounds like she's thrown you into orbiter status, did you even fück her cause your op isn't very clear...

If you did just accept this was ONS/fling and move on.

Well, if she was a 2 then she wouldn't have even responded to my text that I sent like six months later. I honestly thought that she was a zero.

She has responded to all my texts except the last one. But, now she is taking like a ****ing week.

I do agree though that it looks like she is just keeping me as a option, which is whatever I don't really care about that, I have a part in that.

And no, we didn't **** because I ditch her at the club. Probably part of the reason why I still have some interest (to be honest my interest in her is wanning, but outside of this one girl that I'm dating who went back to school in Vancouver, I am really not that interested in meeting new people).

Ultimately, if that's it I'll be okay. But I suppose my ego wants to check her off the list so to speak.

Get to the point..... your wall of text makes you sound like a chick.

Low interest move on... never call out chicks, don't waste your time, just fvcking ignore them.

Hahah what? It's called a story, a lot of **** happened that lead to what's going on today. If I had just said what has happened over the last few weeks there would have been zero context. But, I guess I am a chick. I definitely have my chick like tendencies.

You see, I still believe she has interest in me. Otherwise she would have never reengaged me. But, it's not like it was before. If she doesn't respond anymore, that's fine. At this point I have other things on my mind. But, I see/saw potential and I've put myself in this situation to begin with.

Believe or not, most women in L.A aren't that cool. Not saying that this chick is some goddess or special because she is not. But, she is very down to earth. And that's rare in Cali.​

 

[marmel75]

This is the writing of a guy with no options. At least not options in the same level as her. Which means you need to go get more of those options and stop wasting time on a woman with low to no interest.

 

[TheFixer14]

This is the writing of a guy with no options. At least not options in the same level as her. Which means you need to go get more of those options and stop wasting time on a woman with low to no interest.

The second thing you wrote is absolutely right. No options on the same level as her. I would love to find women like her. Just haven't yet in over the last few months. I know it's popular to say move on and accurate. But, those lingering feelings don't seem to completely relent and that's the annoying part.

I'm at the point where I can accept the fact that what I want isn't going to go down. But, doesn't make it any less painful.

I guess at this point I don't even really want to meet new women. I've been day gaming here and there when the opportunity present itself and still talk to some women. But, it's like I'm just searching you know what I mean? I guess all I can do is keep going break out of it somehow.

 

[marmel75]

The second thing you wrote is absolutely right. No options on the same level as her. I would love to find women like her. Just haven't yet in over the last few months. I know it's popular to say move on and accurate. But, those lingering feelings don't seem to completely relent and that's the annoying part.

I'm at the point where I can accept the fact that what I want isn't going to go down. But, doesn't make it any less painful.

I guess at this point I don't even really want to meet new women. I've been day gaming here and there when the opportunity present itself and still talk to some women. But, it's like I'm just searching you know what I mean? I guess all I can do is keep going break out of it somehow.

All that stuff you talk about is classic when you aren't banging and dating other women because that's all your mind has to focus on.

The only way out is to start dating and banging new women and then you'll find you dont think about her at all because you simply dont have time to.

 

[TheFixer14]

All that stuff you talk about is classic when you aren't banging and dating other women because that's all your mind has to focus on.

The only way out is to start dating and banging new women and then you'll find you dont think about her at all because you simply dont have time to.

Hmmm.

I see what you're saying and this made me think for a second.

I would say that I have made a circle. I took a break for dating for a bit and kinda returned. But, I am different. I don't really put up with any woman's **** anymore.

Also, I don't just want to "bang" anymore. That was/is fun. However, I am looking for some kind of actualization within my relationships with women.

My ego and body may want sex. But, I am not my ego nod my body. What I want is a connection that can help propel me forward. Not an exclusive relationship because that is an ego want too. But, something with depth. That girl for better or worse has made me work on myself.

And, I will add that one just doesn't just "get over" someone that they live after banging women. That's just feeding the ego. At the end of the day that shot will always stay. It's a matter of accepting and approving of what's happened.

So, the way I see it is that I can take another break from women, go out and ****, or try to look for the women who fit my criteria.

 

[marmel75]

Hmmm.

I see what you're saying and this made me think for a second.

I would say that I have made a circle. I took a break for dating for a bit and kinda returned. But, I am different. I don't really put up with any woman's **** anymore.

Also, I don't just want to "bang" anymore. That was/is fun. However, I am looking for some kind of actualization within my relationships with women.

My ego and body may want sex. But, I am not my ego nod my body. What I want is a connection that can help propel me forward. Not an exclusive relationship because that is an ego want too. But, something with depth. That girl for better or worse has made me work on myself.

And, I will add that one just doesn't just "get over" someone that they live after banging women. That's just feeding the ego. At the end of the day that shot will always stay. It's a matter of accepting and approving of what's happened.

So, the way I see it is that I can take another break from women, go out and ****, or try to look for the women who fit my criteria.

It's your job to bang them, its their job to ask you for relationships, not yours.

Don't make the mistake of trying to play the female role in a relationship it will not end well for you.

 

[Murk]

Agree with someone above, her interest is low and you're clutching at straws. That "feeling of connection" - we all get that and let me tell you it's easily replaced and replicated. Move on bro. You don't seem like a total loser so just keep playing the field. Let her go her own path.

It's easy to type that and easy to read, much harder to applicate, but believe me it's only your mind holding you back.

 

[TheFixer14]

It's your job to bang them, its their job to ask you for relationships, not yours.

Don't make the mistake of trying to play the female role in a relationship it will not end well for you.

That's not what I am saying. I don't want a relationship and I don't ask women to be in one either.

What I am is that I want to associate myself with women who I feel can forward my progress. And let's be honest, you really don't meet those in clubs. Day game you do. But in L.A, day game is kinda random since it's more of driving culture here.

My ideal situation is that I am dating four different women who are good mirrors. Right now I got that one who is going to school I. Vancouver and I'll be seeing her again soon. But, finding someone like that in L.A is easier said then done.

I just don't want to take steps forward in my level of consciousness. What I liked about that girl is that me, myself and I turned her on (well, at least before I ****ed up). I could be myself 100% and that's what did it for her. We all know how rare that is. I've dated tons of girls who liked me, but tolerated different aspects of me. I want to be able to be authentic in any situation.

 

[TheFixer14]

Agree with someone above, her interest is low and you're clutching at straws. That "feeling of connection" - we all get that and let me tell you it's easily replaced and replicated. Move on bro. You don't seem like a total loser so just keep playing the field. Let her go her own path.

It's easy to type that and easy to read, much harder to applicate, but believe me it's only your mind holding you back.

I don't just connect with people like that.

Trust me, I've dated women hotter than her over the last few months. But, outside of one chick, they were as cool as her. And she's no longer in the country.

I've already let go in a sense that I can deal with not speaking to her again. I don't plan on hitting her up. Still sucks though. But, whatever.

 

[Murk]

You're young, get out there more. trust me these connections are a dime a dozen.

 

[marmel75]

Calling chicks out rarely works in your favor especially when its a situation where you want to date her and she has no interest.

Exactly what are you hoping to accomplish with that?

 

[mrgoodstuff]

The point of this thread is interest level is crucial.

 

[TheFixer14]

Calling chicks out rarely works in your favor especially when its a situation where you want to date her and she has no interest.

Exactly what are you hoping to accomplish with that?

How can she have no interest yet she has. #1 she told me that she likes me after I told her. #2 she texted me that same day. #3 she not only agreed to go out, but she set the time frame. I've tried text girls after months of no contact before and very rarely get a text back. Her interest level is at least a 5. Otherwise, we would have never spoken. It's definitely not a high level of interest. But, at the very least, she sees me as a sexual option. I still believe that I we will have a friends with benefits kind of relationship.

I want her to stop ****ing around. I want her to either resume going out with me or to just stop. It's an ego thing I guess. But, I want her to be put in her place a bit.

 

[dustmuffin]

How can she have no interest yet she has. #1 she told me that she likes me after I told her. #2 she texted me that same day. #3 she not only agreed to go out, but she set the time frame. I've tried text girls after months of no contact before and very rarely get a text back. Her interest level is at least a 5. Otherwise, we would have never spoken. It's definitely not a high level of interest. But, at the very least, she sees me as a sexual option. I still believe that I we will have a friends with benefits kind of relationship.

I want her to stop ****ing around. I want her to either resume going out with me or to just stop. It's an ego thing I guess. But, I want her to be put in her place a bit.

She was bored and looking for entertainment. A girl that is interested in you will make time for you. She is making it difficult. Women are like a bus, another one comes along in 10 minutes. Go find another bus.

 

[marmel75]

She was bored and looking for entertainment. A girl that is interested in you will make time for you. She is making it difficult. Women are like a bus, another one comes along in 10 minutes. Go find another bus.

Yes this is the whole point he seems to be missing. Women don't confuse guys they are interested in.

 

[TheFixer14]

She was bored and looking for entertainment. A girl that is interested in you will make time for you. She is making it difficult. Women are like a bus, another one comes along in 10 minutes. Go find another bus.

That thought did cross my mind.

Yes this is the whole point he seems to be missing. Women don't confuse guys they are interested in.

Like I said, if her interest was 0, she would have never even responded to me.

But, whatever. I'll probably take a break from women outside of the girl in Vancouver for a few weeks or something. I got enough on my plate with my career. No need for this distraction.