Should Have Saw It Coming

[ZTIME]

I'm sure that down the road I will be fine. It's just crazy to see how all of this stuff has happened sooo quickly!! I can't believe that a mother would move her children out of a house they lived in for 3.5 years and move them into some other guys house within 2 weeks. On some level I think this will be damaging to them in the long run. And based on the stories you posted I'm sure that there is a chance that the damage may already be done.

 

[The Duke]

And they all claim they don't allow new guys around their children until they are exclusive with you. You usually hear that 2 days before you nail them in their bedroom while their children are asleep in the next room.

They are all controlled by their emotions and how they feel at that point in time. Thats why you can't relate to them with logic.

 

[ZTIME]

And they all claim they don't allow new guys around their children until they are exclusive with you. You usually hear that 2 days before you nail them in their bedroom while their children are asleep in the next room.

They are all controlled by their emotions and how they feel at that point in time. Thats why you can't relate to them with logic.

It's unbelievable to me..........I gotta let this whole thing go. Gotta get it out of my mind. I've got a business to run and myself to work on.

So many of these posts are correct about how much of an idiot I was for having anything to do with this girl, and how I need to man up and walk away.

It's tough, especially when the girl is completely different in 2 weeks from anything you've seen in 3.5 years. It sickens me to no end.

This is a lesson I'll never forget. Chicks can really be emotional time bombs. This one just had a long fuse.

 

[VladPatton]

Sorry to hear about this situation but it's your fault for being a softee about her moving in with you with 3 kids, and then taking your goddamn furniture. WTF, man!! How the fück in Sir Satan's Green Hell did you not get pissed off and lay a goddamn mushroom cloud at that point????

Cut this maniac from your life from all platforms, stop talking to her, fück her mail, and fück her life with the new chump she's with. Fück your furniture, too, go get new shıt and bang a new chick on it and enjoy your life once again. You're free now.

Consider yourself lucky you got rid of her, and get yourself another chick that is free of kids. Raising someone else's sperm is not your responsibility, so don't sign up for it willingly because a Marie Claire magazine said you should. It's not always a good thing.

Just forget about this nut for now, go to Ikea and buy some stuff, and start healing your mind. Good luck, man.

 

[Tenacity]

ZTIME

.....I walked into a house with a lot of missing furniture. Beds, tables, bar stools, lamps, wall hangings, desks, and cabinets. Funny thing was she didn't own any of it. She took every towel, every bed sheet and blanket, and anything else she could put in the moving truck she rented. It was insane.

I actually forgot to address this part. Bro, you aren't letting this go without a police report right? I don't care if you don't want it no more, go and file a criminal report against her with the police that she stole your items. You were not married to her, those were your items, and she stole them. File a police report to go over and get the items back, then sue her in a civil case for damages. If she wants drama, give it to her. You work too hard for your shyt to let some entitled slvt take it from you dude. While in the process of doing this, file a restraining order against her....you want to make sure you stay STEPS ahead of this chick because she might get one on you eventually.

 

[sodbuster]

^^^^^^this....

 

[Stugots26]

Document everything from now on. Get yourself a digital recorder and tape any live conversations you have with her (check your state laws for clandestine recording as a crime). If she starts to accuse you of abuse or battery, you need to be able to prove that you didn't do anything.

 

[Scaramouche]

Dear ZTime,
Tenacity is soo right...In this country such a thing is very embarrassing as the Police usually go to you place of work and deliver a court Summons LOL.

 

[ZTIME]

I actually forgot to address this part. Bro, you aren't letting this go without a police report right? I don't care if you don't want it no more, go and file a criminal report against her with the police that she stole your items. You were not married to her, those were your items, and she stole them. File a police report to go over and get the items back, then sue her in a civil case for damages. If she wants drama, give it to her. You work too hard for your shyt to let some entitled slvt take it from you dude. While in the process of doing this, file a restraining order against her....you want to make sure you stay STEPS ahead of this chick because she might get one on you eventually.

I've completely walked away. She can have what ever she took. It's the cost of getting out of that f***ed up relationship. I'm still hurt and in shock over everything, but in time I'll be stronger and better. I won't create any drama. I feel that if I did that, she would think that I still care. Sometimes It's easier to just walk away and never look back. I've changed all of the locks on the doors and anyone coming into my neighborhood is being recorded at the guard gate. I have no record of abuse, nor would I ever abuse a woman, so I have no worries there. There is always new furniture out there. Thank You though. Time to heal my mind and soul.

 

[Prime_Beef]

If you're semi smart, you already have photos of your house before she moved in.you now have photos of what is missing, and hopefully some text msg verified discussion.

You are doing yourself a disservice not getting your stuff back. Contact the police. Ask them what to do. They will want you to file a report. You then tell her what is coming, that you have photo evidence of what is missing, and insurance logs of inventory, and get in with it. If not returned in x time, file report.

Opposite of love is not anger and hate. It's apathy. Since there's no love, do nothing for her you wouldn't do to a stranger that robbed you...because that's what she is. I second the restraint order, she's a known thief. Hope your locks are changed or you could have a "pacific heights" episode!

 

[Tenacity]

ZTIME

I've completely walked away. She can have what ever she took. It's the cost of getting out of that f***ed up relationship. I'm still hurt and in shock over everything, but in time I'll be stronger and better. I won't create any drama. I feel that if I did that, she would think that I still care. Sometimes It's easier to just walk away and never look back. I've changed all of the locks on the doors and anyone coming into my neighborhood is being recorded at the guard gate. I have no record of abuse, nor would I ever abuse a woman, so I have no worries there. There is always new furniture out there. Thank You though. Time to heal my mind and soul

.

Well, a couple of things.

- Listen, dude, you got screwed. It's okay to be "hurt," I am all for not walking around whining and bytching in your everyday life, but there's nothing wrong with admitting to yourself that you got screwed and it hurt. The shyt does HURT, that's why I try to position myself now so I don't get screwed by women, business partners, etc.

- You having "no record of abuse" means jack shyt, if a woman calls up and says you beat her then the cops have to arrest somebody when they show up (no matter if there's marks present on the supposed victim or not).

- You need to be proactive to PROTECT YOURSELF. You need to file a police report that she stole your items and want them back, and then SUE her in civil court for the damages. You should be able to do it in small claims depending upon the value of everything, or if you need an attorney it shouldn't be that expensive.

- You need to be proactive to PROTECT YOURSELF. You need to file a restraining order against her. When you walk into YOUR HOUSE and YOUR ITEMS are cleaned out, that's not the actions of someone wrapped tight, she's apparently NOT wrapped too tight.

Maybe the situation is over, maybe she won't fvck with you anymore? Then maybe, she's not done fvcking with you? If she ever tries to fvck with you again, say you did something to her, did something to her children, or whatever....you have a police report detailing how she stole your items, as well as a restraining order against her. These things will help you should she start to fvck with you.

Lol, dude....if some chick TOOK MY SHYT? My shyt that I work hard as fvck for? Spent time working full time, going to college full time, saving, investing, budgeting, etc. for? That chick would have a world of trouble on her hands....

 

[ZTIME]

.

Well, a couple of things.

- Listen, dude, you got screwed. It's okay to be "hurt," I am all for not walking around whining and bytching in your everyday life, but there's nothing wrong with admitting to yourself that you got screwed and it hurt. The shyt does HURT, that's why I try to position myself now so I don't get screwed by women, business partners, etc.

- You having "no record of abuse" means jack shyt, if a woman calls up and says you beat her then the cops have to arrest somebody when they show up (no matter if there's marks present on the supposed victim or not).

- You need to be proactive to PROTECT YOURSELF. You need to file a police report that she stole your items and want them back, and then SUE her in civil court for the damages. You should be able to do it in small claims depending upon the value of everything, or if you need an attorney it shouldn't be that expensive.

- You need to be proactive to PROTECT YOURSELF. You need to file a restraining order against her. When you walk into YOUR HOUSE and YOUR ITEMS are cleaned out, that's not the actions of someone wrapped tight, she's apparently NOT wrapped too tight.

Maybe the situation is over, maybe she won't fvck with you anymore? Then maybe, she's not done fvcking with you? If she ever tries to fvck with you again, say you did something to her, did something to her children, or whatever....you have a police report detailing how she stole your items, as well as a restraining order against her. These things will help you should she start to fvck with you.

Lol, dude....if some chick TOOK MY SHYT? My shyt that I work hard as fvck for? Spent time working full time, going to college full time, saving, investing, budgeting, etc. for? That chick would have a world of trouble on her hands....

I do agree with you about everything. However, I can't put myself through the aggravation.

You're right.. This s*** hurts real bad. Having this girl leave and watch her move her three kids into some other guys house in a matter of 2 weeks is just disgusting to me. It makes me feel like a worthless piece of crap.

I had to block all of our mutual friends on facebook just so I wouldn't see stupid posts about her and her new guy (Fairy Tales do Come True). It's insane.

I'll live better knowing that her kids at least have some furniture for there new place when that dude boots her out. I'll feel better knowing that at least they have beds to sleep in. It's not their fault.

 

[Tenacity]

ZTIME,

You are a good man sir. And it's just unfortunate that good men are used as shark bait today.

 

[gov87]

I do agree with you about everything. However, I can't put myself through the aggravation.

You're right.. This s*** hurts real bad. Having this girl leave and watch her move her three kids into some other guys house in a matter of 2 weeks is just disgusting to me. It makes me feel like a worthless piece of crap.

I had to block all of our mutual friends on facebook just so I wouldn't see stupid posts about her and her new guy (Fairy Tales do Come True). It's insane.

I'll live better knowing that her kids at least have some furniture for there new place when that dude boots her out. I'll feel better knowing that at least they have beds to sleep in. It's not their fault.

ZTIME, I want you to really listen bud...

First, UNDERSTAND THAT YOU ARE NOT THINKING STRAIGHT STILL AT THIS MOMENT. Your emotions are all over the place right now and from what you have been through, they should be.

After you accept that you're not thinking right, BECAUSE YOU'RE NOT, stop beating yourself up so much. Have some compassion for yourself while also realizing you let this happen. Sure, she's a crazy POS, but you had your part too. This is ok and you will eventually see it as a good thing and turn your life around if you choose to swallow the red pill.

You, like most on this forum and many others across this country, have been living in a haze. TRUST ME, a part of you says it does right now and there's prob an even deeper part this will deny this truth right now. It will take time to to get better and when it does you'll be better than ever. I promise man.

Look at the part of your post I bolded--- You're telling yourself this bc you're in denial right now. You probably really believe you're doing good for the kids, but that's just another excuse to avoid the truth... The truth that you were USED. Yes, I know that hurts and our egos will come up with ways of not admitting this, but we have to learn to look past it. You feel horrible right now, but you can come out on top man. There are going to be many ups and downs, but as a man you have it in you to live to your full potential.

Now, I want you to really listen, you need to get your furniture back. I'm sure those kids really are great, but they DO NOT MATTER. The only thing that matters is YOU in this situation. You can look at this situation of getting your furniture back as your first step towards the man you're supposed to be. The furniture is not hers and you are enabling her bad behavior by letting her win. A part of you doesn't want to fight it right now bc you're so weak. So listen, my friend, we are here on this forum to supply you with this strength to get you through the RIGHT way.

Dude, I'm 27, younger than you I know. But we are so much alike. The more you progress, the more you'll realize this. Same with the others on the forum. One thing I want you to do is understand that all woman are not bad. It'll be easy to start thinking this way as the truth begins to set in, but there is someone out there that will make you feel like you should. The only catch is you must first do the work on yourself.

I know this sucks man, so many of us can relate. If I could do something to fix this world and a lot of the women's attitudes in it, believe me, I'd prob sacrifice my left testicle for it (well, prob not, but you get what I mean).

Please, really try to understand and take in my post along with the advice the others have given you. Many of them have much more experience than me, but I'll only give advice where I'm confident. For what it counts, I believe in you brother because we all have a power engrained in ourselves as men. You just haven't exactly found your way yet, but when you do, all of this BS you're experiencing now will be a sweet memory that led you to your true destiny.

Continue posting what you feel and be honest. You can PM me anytime. You can do this.

 

[Tenacity]

gov is spot on. I mean I hate to sound like a psycho here lol, but you can honestly see how men in the news who end up killing their baby mommas, ex-wives, etc., you can just see how they were driven to do it.

- Starts out, everything is fine. The guy loves the woman, does everything for the chick, he's doing "what he's supposed to do" based upon society based standards.

- One day, out of the fvcking blue, she screws him.

- The guy is sitting there confused as fvck as to what happened? What in the fvck did I do wrong? I was there for her, there for the kids, paid the bills on time, what the fvck is the problem here?

- Then he wakes up and realizes, she never loved me in the first place. All I was to her was entertainment, free money and free dyck. If I died from a heart attack she wouldn't give a fvck.

- Then, while realizing all of this, the extreme HURT turns to extreme ANGER. That extreme ANGER...as he sits and stews on it, turns to RAGE.

- And he wipes out every fvcking body in sight, including that stupid, entitled chick.

- Then the story ends with society and the media forever painting his legacy as a crazy, mentally ill lunatic that decided to OFF his wife. Never once, does society or the media ask did the wife drive him to it? Did he just get fed up with the bullshyt and decided to TAKE his life and hers?

In August, one of my favorite comedians OFFED himself. Robin Williams. And it's pretty much well known at this point (despite whatever illness he had), that it was the STRESS from all the women screwing him over in his life that drove that man to do it. But do you see the media discussing that part of it? Do you see society discussing it? Nope......

 

[gov87]

Tenacity speaks another disturbing truth. You'll hear the media label Robin William's mental illness along with many other things which are only to paint a story, a story that has the truth behind it but that isn't what is told.

Right now, ZTIME, you feel hurt and sad. Once you start to come into the light of the truth, should you choose to see it, this will turn to bitterness and anger. Luckily, you'll be able to channel this in a positive direction and it will also serve as motivation for avoiding another situation like this and respecting yourself more.

Just think if you had gotten married to this woman and took you for everything... i know you're in a haze right now, but just imagine the rage you would feel. That's no way to live or let yourself be made to feel.

 

[ZTIME]

ZTIME, I want you to really listen bud...

First, UNDERSTAND THAT YOU ARE NOT THINKING STRAIGHT STILL AT THIS MOMENT. Your emotions are all over the place right now and from what you have been through, they should be.

After you accept that you're not thinking right, BECAUSE YOU'RE NOT, stop beating yourself up so much. Have some compassion for yourself while also realizing you let this happen. Sure, she's a crazy POS, but you had your part too. This is ok and you will eventually see it as a good thing and turn your life around if you choose to swallow the red pill.

You, like most on this forum and many others across this country, have been living in a haze. TRUST ME, a part of you says it does right now and there's prob an even deeper part this will deny this truth right now. It will take time to to get better and when it does you'll be better than ever. I promise man.

Look at the part of your post I bolded--- You're telling yourself this bc you're in denial right now. You probably really believe you're doing good for the kids, but that's just another excuse to avoid the truth... The truth that you were USED. Yes, I know that hurts and our egos will come up with ways of not admitting this, but we have to learn to look past it. You feel horrible right now, but you can come out on top man. There are going to be many ups and downs, but as a man you have it in you to live to your full potential.

Now, I want you to really listen, you need to get your furniture back. I'm sure those kids really are great, but they DO NOT MATTER. The only thing that matters is YOU in this situation. You can look at this situation of getting your furniture back as your first step towards the man you're supposed to be. The furniture is not hers and you are enabling her bad behavior by letting her win. A part of you doesn't want to fight it right now bc you're so weak. So listen, my friend, we are here on this forum to supply you with this strength to get you through the RIGHT way.

Dude, I'm 27, younger than you I know. But we are so much alike. The more you progress, the more you'll realize this. Same with the others on the forum. One thing I want you to do is understand that all woman are not bad. It'll be easy to start thinking this way as the truth begins to set in, but there is someone out there that will make you feel like you should. The only catch is you must first do the work on yourself.

I know this sucks man, so many of us can relate. If I could do something to fix this world and a lot of the women's attitudes in it, believe me, I'd prob sacrifice my left testicle for it (well, prob not, but you get what I mean).

Please, really try to understand and take in my post along with the advice the others have given you. Many of them have much more experience than me, but I'll only give advice where I'm confident. For what it counts, I believe in you brother because we all have a power engrained in ourselves as men. You just haven't exactly found your way yet, but when you do, all of this BS you're experiencing now will be a sweet memory that led you to your true destiny.

Continue posting what you feel and be honest. You can PM me anytime. You can do this.

I want you guys to know that I'm happy I found this site. It's been great to get this poison out of myself without involving to many of my friends or employees.

I totally agree that every relationship has two parties involved and have no problem admitting that I too contributed to this happening. I even saw the signs and still lacked the confidence to do anything about them.

You see, the guy that is posting here today is a beaten man, filled with remorse and regret and self loathing. But that is not the guy I am. I have a largely successful business here and am starting a new company as we speak. I'm used to winning. I'm used to getting up every morning, putting in the effort and winning in every aspect of life.

I allowed myself to put this type of effort into this relationship with this girl and her three children. I worked hard every day to try to create the perfect environment for them. Not realizing that every day I was losing parts of me that would be damaging in the future. I stopped getting up every morning and working out, I stopped dreaming of my next conquest to solidify my future and retirement, I allowed myself to get fat, I stopped taking care of me so that I could create this sudo utopian world for others.

Many of you will read this post and look at me like a beaten and battered "Beta" and you would all be right...Today. But it's been about a month since this break up. It's not the first relationship I've been in and it probably won't be the last.

You see, about 2 weeks after the breakup when I sent that ridiculos text about how terrible I felt and I received that cold response it started a fire. It led me to seek out help to dump my feelings. It led me to find this site. Daily this fire intensifies. Daily I evolve.

I started the 60 day NC challenge on this site, not with any desire to win back my ex, but to heal. Mind, Body, and Soul. We should just call it infinity NC. I see no reason to ever turn back.

Restarted my Buddhist meditation classes (I missed the peace), Cleaned house top to bottom, Read every post on here at least 6 times, Started P-90X again 2 weeks in, lost 15lbs (the breakup starvation diet), started developing my chemical company to distribute throughout the US (www.mzmdistribution.com). I'm progressing.

Now I know that many of you believe that I should be getting this furniture back to send a statement that I will not allow anyone to steal from me or beat me down. And I am not disagreeing. But you are right. At this point and time the wounds are a little fresh and I still have that defeated feeling. I know that I should do this, but I choose not to. I've ordered new furniture which will be delivered next Wednesday. Finances right now are not my problem. So I'll consider it a charitable donation to three children who have to deal with the messed up decisions their mother will need to make.

I'm starting to walk the path of healing. I know that for now the pain and suffering is great, but I also know that in time it will fade.

For 27 your insight is remarkable. Thank You.

 

[Shaka]

Dear ZTIME,

About the furnitures, I can give you another pespective (although, the posters above are spot on)
I was in a similar situation (I mean with furnitures and ****). The thing is, the power of NC is real. It's real for healing and being the best man you can be.

So, I really didn't want to break NC, and money wasn't a problem, so I decided to leave it and focus on me and my healing first.
I know it's hard but believe everyone here, it's the right thing to do.
So if money isn't a problem, leave the furnitures be. Don't break NC EVER.

Actually, go buy some new sh1t and make your environment better, an environement where you soon-to-be DJ will be pleased to be in.

Also start to lift.

And finally, if she contact you, report here. Don't succumb to your emotional roller-coster.

Best of lucks

 

[ZTIME]

gov is spot on. I mean I hate to sound like a psycho here lol, but you can honestly see how men in the news who end up killing their baby mommas, ex-wives, etc., you can just see how they were driven to do it.

- Starts out, everything is fine. The guy loves the woman, does everything for the chick, he's doing "what he's supposed to do" based upon society based standards.

- One day, out of the fvcking blue, she screws him.

- The guy is sitting there confused as fvck as to what happened? What in the fvck did I do wrong? I was there for her, there for the kids, paid the bills on time, what the fvck is the problem here?

- Then he wakes up and realizes, she never loved me in the first place. All I was to her was entertainment, free money and free dyck. If I died from a heart attack she wouldn't give a fvck.

- Then, while realizing all of this, the extreme HURT turns to extreme ANGER. That extreme ANGER...as he sits and stews on it, turns to RAGE.

- And he wipes out every fvcking body in sight, including that stupid, entitled chick.

- Then the story ends with society and the media forever painting his legacy as a crazy, mentally ill lunatic that decided to OFF his wife. Never once, does society or the media ask did the wife drive him to it? Did he just get fed up with the bullshyt and decided to TAKE his life and hers?

In August, one of my favorite comedians OFFED himself. Robin Williams. And it's pretty much well known at this point (despite whatever illness he had), that it was the STRESS from all the women screwing him over in his life that drove that man to do it. But do you see the media discussing that part of it? Do you see society discussing it? Nope......

Thank you for all of the help brother. You've gone out of your way to post and take care of a down and out dude. I've read and reread your posts several times. I'll get through this, but wanted to take the time to say thanks. I'll post to let you all know my progress.

 

[ZTIME]

Why does the mind have the tendency to **** with your emotions? It's like in my head I'm counting the time that passed since this has all happened. Today it's been exactly 30 days since this has happened. It still feels as fresh as day 1 and 2.

I try, but I just can't seem to stop myself from looking back! All I want to do is move forward! Obsessing over this just feels so damn toxic!

That's where I'm at today!