Going to an event this weekend and this chick I been talking some with will be there also. I heard through mutual friends she is going with a girlfriend. She told me last week she wanted to spend some time with me there. What's the best way to handle this if she has a friend there. I don't like doing meet ups with third wheels.
She's bringing a friend
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oldmanofthesea
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I agree with samspade but you haven't provided enough detail in your specific situation. Is this a date you organized with her, for the primary purpose of seeing her, or is this an event you both happen to be going to? It sounds like the latter and if so, you have zero grounds to be upset or see it as a bad sign on her part - just hang out and have fun and make the best of the situation.
But why have you been "talking some" with a girl without having asked her on a DATE? To me that's part of the issue right there. That would prevent situations like this. This makes it sound like you are hovering around her being all "nice" in hopes she gives you a clear signal that it is safe to proceed, in order to eliminate any chance for rejection on your side. That's not a good way to go.
Also, hearing who she's going there with from a mutual friend seems strange to me as well..... Why are you talking about her to mutual friends? This seems like you are being really shy and weak... Asking about her, telling people what you're doing together etc, which is really bad for a number of reasons. It will get back to her which will make you look extra weak. Especially since you haven't even been on a date with this girl! Why so much thought and investment in someone you haven't dated, slept with, or even kissed?
1. See girl you like
2. Ask girl out on DATE, 1:1
3. Anything other than a yes, and you can avoid all this kind of BS and put her in your past
4. Don't talk about her to mutual friends!
But why have you been "talking some" with a girl without having asked her on a DATE? To me that's part of the issue right there. That would prevent situations like this. This makes it sound like you are hovering around her being all "nice" in hopes she gives you a clear signal that it is safe to proceed, in order to eliminate any chance for rejection on your side. That's not a good way to go.
Also, hearing who she's going there with from a mutual friend seems strange to me as well..... Why are you talking about her to mutual friends? This seems like you are being really shy and weak... Asking about her, telling people what you're doing together etc, which is really bad for a number of reasons. It will get back to her which will make you look extra weak. Especially since you haven't even been on a date with this girl! Why so much thought and investment in someone you haven't dated, slept with, or even kissed?
1. See girl you like
2. Ask girl out on DATE, 1:1
3. Anything other than a yes, and you can avoid all this kind of BS and put her in your past
4. Don't talk about her to mutual friends!
I am going on my own just to have fun. She had signed up after me knowing I was going. Her and I flirted a lot in the past but she was always flakey about getting together with me so I removed my attention and moved on. She knows I date around. I still hear from her occasionally but don't put much effort into her. I know she was dating an ex for a while so basically just left her alone and backed off.
We have a lot of mutual friends and one asked about the event and she told me this girl was going with another one of their friends. I didn't comment on it and let it be.
I'm not chasing this chick but she is definitely keeping tabs on me... likes a lot of my social media posts and always follows my snap and insta stories. I give her zero attention back.
If she makes an effort to hang out I'm cool with that but I'm not keen on there being a friend hanging around.
oldmanofthesea
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If she's been flaky about getting together in the past, then you know where you stand: You are a platonic friend, therefore there is no reason for you to be concerned about her having another friend around. You need to ignore the social media stuff - or at least not project your desire onto her to where you believe her liking your posts or keeping tabs on you means something it doesn't. I know you say you removed attention, but just the fact that you're worried about the consequences of her having another friend around when you bump into her at an event paints a different picture. The only time you need to be concerned about a tag-along is if you are going out with her on a 1:1 date. That's not what this is, and your concern for the friend being there tells me that you think you'll be able to use this face-time as an opportunity to do what she never gave you the chance to do before: charm her 1:1. If the girl hasn't agreed to a date with you 1:1 and has flaked, any 1:1 investment you make in her (with a romantic goal in mind) is going to be wasted effort and only serve to validate her.
You are a beta male unfortunately thats why you don’t know where you stand and are getting mixed signals. Why havent u fked her yet o wait that questions answered in my first sentence.
Look bro at some point you gotta man up and grab your balls. You seem very soft spoken and wishy washy.
Then u get the fake alpha advice on here. “Bring a girl thats hotter buahahaha” yeah ok this dude is having trouble figuring out wtf to do in a simple situation like this and u think hes got hotter chicks on deck on the backburner at his beck and call. If he did and they were hotter why the fuk would he even be wasting time with this other chick? Incel logic at its finest.
OP you arent decisive enough. U havent even smashed this chick yet. I dont do group outing until after i banged but in this instance i would go just for the fun of it but i bet u she will end up grinding on some chad or tyrone in front of u and then we will get another thread about it lulz
Look bro at some point you gotta man up and grab your balls. You seem very soft spoken and wishy washy.
Then u get the fake alpha advice on here. “Bring a girl thats hotter buahahaha” yeah ok this dude is having trouble figuring out wtf to do in a simple situation like this and u think hes got hotter chicks on deck on the backburner at his beck and call. If he did and they were hotter why the fuk would he even be wasting time with this other chick? Incel logic at its finest.
OP you arent decisive enough. U havent even smashed this chick yet. I dont do group outing until after i banged but in this instance i would go just for the fun of it but i bet u she will end up grinding on some chad or tyrone in front of u and then we will get another thread about it lulz
Seems like alot to go thru. All game playing bs. Betas have to pull this kind of ****.
TheGambino
Master Don Juan
This is what i always do!!!!!!
In reality tho it is...i mean your trying to smash this chick and shes putting your ass in the friend zone and your trying to get her jealous and illicit a response by bringing another girl into play which could also backfire and u might lose both just sayinYeah it's pretty hard...
We get it, we're all betas.
Ok im feelin that for sure I will testthis out
When she comes to find me I will flirt them both up then go do my own thing. I am married and she's already jealous of my wife (who is just as hot as her). She knows we are in an open relationship so it's on the table
I don't have to chase
I'll go home and give to to my wife
But yeah "I'm BeTa" lol
I don't have to chase
I'll go home and give to to my wife
But yeah "I'm BeTa" lol
so your wife takes other dudes c0cks?
No, she is bi. The only playing she does is with women with me in a threesome. I do see other women alone also.
MillionBillionaire
Master Don Juan
For once... I agree with this guy. F all this monkey business. That is waayyy too much work for a chick.
MillionBillionaire
Master Don Juan
As far as social proof shyt goes .. all that goes out the window when chad walks in... are you.. chad?