She says "No means NO" etc...

[Duke]

So recently this girl who looks to be good LTR material says some sh!t over instant messenger like, "If you try to cop a feel while I'm sleeping I'll throw you out of my house." (I've slept at her house twice but haven't sexed her.)

I called her bullsh!t and told her that it's a sad day if she feels she has to tell me not to touch her while she's asleep.

She then says that I can be "determined" and spits this at me:

her: if your trying to push your hand up my shirt and I stop you at a point that means STOP
me: ok
her: it doesn't mean try again 30 seconds later
her: and try to resist my freakin hand

Ugh. The whole frame is messed up, because she shouldn't feel like she's the prize too this degree. But I am wondering if I should put ANY creedence to what she is saying. Like yeah, of course I'm not going to RAPE her, but my understanding of this was to continue kissing and try again later. WTF guys? Should I disregard what she's saying and continue with my old M.O., or could it be that she enjoys making out with me AS A FRIEND and doesn't want to fvck me?

Comments are much appreciated.

-Duke

 

[KOSR]

Do friends make out? Huh?

 

[TillTheEndOfTime]

No means no, so out you go!

This girl has got baggage. This girl has to get over herself. I would keep my distance from her.

 

[Duke]

Originally posted by KnightOfSexualRelief
Do friends make out? Huh?

Bwahaha! I'd say no... but we are good 'friends.' I mean we have a really strong rapport, but we make out and flirt and ****. I've been trying to sex her for like fvcking 3 months, and it just drags on and on... and on.

I feel like its holding me back as a DJ/PUA. But at the same time I do care for her.

Originally posted by TillTheEndOfTime
No means no, so out you go!

This girl has got baggage. This girl has to get over herself. I would keep my distance from her.

Agreed. Agreed. Agreed. I actually told her over the phone one night that I had to cut off contact with her because I couldn't be with her if she wanted to be only friends.

Well she called back crying, begging me not to do that. My value shot back up in her mind, so I stayed. I still think I can fvck her if I persist, but when she says sh!t like this, I have to wonder if 1) she wants me to fvck her in the first place or 2) if she's even worth my time anymore.

 

[Climax]

hmmm...

I would say that she is just not sure what to do.

1) She might think that your friendship will change if u f*ck her

2) She might not be sure if its the right thing to do

3) When she sais to you that if she sais "no" then it "NO" and not for u to try 30 seconds later... maybe this is to see if u have respect for her, think of it as a "test". And if u were to say "fine" and "respect" her, then she might want to f*ck YOU. So next time u ar in that situation, respect her wished, and stay ur ground, make her touch YOU or hint to YOU if she wants anything to happen.

4) She might not feel "comfortable" with making out with one of her "good friends"

5) Question: Is she a virgin?

6) Maybe having a nice romantic dinner, and maybe watching a nice movie aftyerwards will "put her in the mood" to do anything... i mean... u DO need to out her in the mood u know

Well... ya, thats my 2c about this situation.

Laterz...

 

[MindOverMatter]

Sounds like she has a ton of baggage, I'd pass on her personally, but it's your decision.

 

[Bonhomme]

Bad News

Yeah, it looks like this gal's bad news, and you shouldn't expect anything out of her ...

BUT ...

If you're game, you can try this for a bit of sport: make out with her, but cut it short. Give her a bit of attention, but never as much as she wants. Make yourself scarce. See if she then craves more.

Meanwhile, keep her at the bottom of your list. There are thousands of other gals out there.

 

[Francisco d'Anconia]

Did she tell you those things to keep you in check or to keep herself in check?

Just something to consider...

 

[xiola]

quit trying. That will get her attention. She'll start to see that she may lose you and better start acting better. If that doesnt work, then there is nothing there anyway

b

 

[Bonhomme]

Hmmmm.....

Did she tell you those things to keep you in check or to keep herself in check?

By Jove, that could be right.

 

[ogre]

you know what's really sad? I was in a sitch like this, a long ways back, with a girl who was still a virgin at 25 and would not put out. not for nothin'. I took her out, treated her right, etc, etc, and got jack sh*t. after a few months she gave me the "I think we should see other people" line. OK, fine. see ya.

So TWO YEARS later she finds my # in the phone book and calls me, wanted to know why I dumped her (go figger) She was SO broken-hearted over me that the next loser that came along in her life she right away fvcked him, got married, had a baby, and was sooooooo miserable with her loser hubby who is a junkie and can't hold a job.


all I can say is, don't be me. walk away. don't even bother to "dump" her. that would be giving her more respect and dignity than she deserves. don't bother calling or nothin'. let her wonder. let her get anxiety attacks. let infatuation fester within her. let her go on the internet posting on women's forums. if she comes around, great. if not, fine. either way stop pi$$ing away your valuable time and energy on her.

there is a article in the tips or archive section about "ganji" game. look it up.

 

[Levex]

Its chicks like that who file most of sexual harrasment lawsuits in this country. I would stay away if i were you to avoid any unneccesary trouble.

 

[Señor Fingers]

Hi Duke!

Anytime a girl brings up something like this, its because she ENJOYS your persistence but feels guilty for it. So she manages to keep herself "pure" by telling you "No means no"

The best way to respond is not to get absorbed in her way of thinking. Treat her like a child who is playing silly games. Tell her how much you respect her and value the friendship as you feel her up! If she continues to fuss, thats when you put the b!tch on ice. Punish her by withdrawing all of your attention and vanish for a while. Realize that she is doing you no favors by sexing you. She is getting something out of this as well, try as she might to deny this fact.

Bonhomme was pretty much on point. Get out there and let her see that she has competition from girls who will be MUCH nicer to you!

(Or if you really want to mind-fukk, give her the ol' LJBF)

In other words, take control of the situation and stop treating her like she has the Holy Grail in her pants!

 

[DeathDealer]

It's simple, she has major major major baggage. You probably consider her LTR cause you don't know sh1t about women yet. Look elsewhere, I've been through women like this!!!

 

[Duke]

Hi Duke!

Anytime a girl brings up something like this, its because she ENJOYS your persistence but feels guilty for it. So she manages to keep herself "pure" by telling you "No means no"

The best way to respond is not to get absorbed in her way of thinking. Treat her like a child who is playing silly games. Tell her how much you respect her and value the friendship as you feel her up! If she continues to fuss, thats when you put the b!tch on ice. Punish her by withdrawing all of your attention and vanish for a while. Realize that she is doing you no favors by sexing you. She is getting something out of this as well, try as she might to deny this fact.

Bonhomme was pretty much on point. Get out there and let her see that she has competition from girls who will be MUCH nicer to you!

(Or if you really want to mind-fukk, give her the ol' LJBF)

In other words, take control of the situation and stop treating her like she has the Holy Grail in her pants!

Ah, a classic Mystery Method freeze-out. If only I had understood how to do them back then, I would have laid her no problem

Instead I played that stupid game where you keep trying to do the same sh!t over and over (take a shirt off, unbutton a bra, get ur hand down her panties) over and over and she kept playing the game too, moving my hand away over and over.

What a ridiculous game!!

Don't play it.

Freeze them the fvck out!

"No" ?? Well, when girls tell me "No", it REALLY turns me off... like I can't even help it... it just turns me off totally, it's not something I have control of.

Then you push her away, turn on the lights, turn on the TV, and go watch one of those gory plastic surgery shows with great interest for 10 mins.

Then turn all the stuff off again, and go back to her and TELL her to take off the piece of clothing you were trying to get off. Don't try to take it off of her. TELL HER to take it off. Because you don't play that stupid game. If she refuses, then repeat the freeze-out, only this time make it for 20 minutes, etc.

Don't let ignorance of LMR tactics prevent u from gettin' laid!!!!!! :nono:

 

[MetalFortress]

So recently this girl who looks to be good LTR material says some sh!t over instant messenger like, "If you try to cop a feel while I'm sleeping I'll throw you out of my house." (I've slept at her house twice but haven't sexed her.)

I called her bullsh!t and told her that it's a sad day if she feels she has to tell me not to touch her while she's asleep.

She then says that I can be "determined" and spits this at me:

her: if your trying to push your hand up my shirt and I stop you at a point that means STOP
me: ok
her: it doesn't mean try again 30 seconds later
her: and try to resist my freakin hand

Ugh. The whole frame is messed up, because she shouldn't feel like she's the prize too this degree. But I am wondering if I should put ANY creedence to what she is saying. Like yeah, of course I'm not going to RAPE her, but my understanding of this was to continue kissing and try again later. WTF guys? Should I disregard what she's saying and continue with my old M.O., or could it be that she enjoys making out with me AS A FRIEND and doesn't want to fvck me?

Comments are much appreciated.

-Duke

To the first comment I would have replied, "What kind of a guy do you think I am? I'd never do that while you're asleep! I'd make sure you were awake!"

Overall, though, she sounds about as warm as frozen Costco ham. I'd never engage in LTR with someone like this.

Is this Sarah or a new chick?

 

[DJ4Real]

So recently this girl who looks to be good LTR material says some sh!t over instant messenger like, "If you try to cop a feel while I'm sleeping I'll throw you out of my house." (I've slept at her house twice but haven't sexed her.)

I called her bullsh!t and told her that it's a sad day if she feels she has to tell me not to touch her while she's asleep.

She then says that I can be "determined" and spits this at me:

her: if your trying to push your hand up my shirt and I stop you at a point that means STOP
me: ok
her: it doesn't mean try again 30 seconds later
her: and try to resist my freakin hand

Ugh. The whole frame is messed up, because she shouldn't feel like she's the prize too this degree. But I am wondering if I should put ANY creedence to what she is saying. Like yeah, of course I'm not going to RAPE her, but my understanding of this was to continue kissing and try again later. WTF guys? Should I disregard what she's saying and continue with my old M.O., or could it be that she enjoys making out with me AS A FRIEND and doesn't want to fvck me?

Comments are much appreciated.

-Duke

This girl is really believes that a guy would do "ANYTHING" to have sex with her. Is she really that ****y?

You need to surprise her.

Say something that is ****y and funny to make you look more like the prize.

" Why would I do that? I'm not desperate for you. Don't get your panties in a bunch, from the way that you are acting, it's you who wants me... I can't blame you though."

She may pretend to be "angry"....she'll get over it really fast though.

 

[Duke]

Yeah, that was Sarah, notice the date of the original post.

What Fingers said to do would have worked.

Not a knock on the guy at all, but a lot of the techniques he preached on this site are stock ASF stuff.

And yeah she believed a guy would do anything to have sex with her. I probably partly fed that illusion by engaging in that ridiculous "I put my hand here and you slap it away" game.

A well-timed freeze-out would have set her straight really fast.

Looking back, she was a virgin and had some intimacy problems. So I don't think my game is entirely at fault, but I'm sure I could have laid her if I knew about freeze-outs and other LMR techniques.

She lost a lot of respect for me after I slept at her apartment a couple times and didn't lay her. So guys, never do that. Try freezing her out and the other stock LMR techniques and if those don't work, leave or kick her out. Whatever you do, DON'T sleep at her house or let her sleep at yours without laying her. If you do this, you'll probably NEVER lay her. Show her that she can't get diamonds (companionship, emotional stimulation) without giving you gold (sex). If she withholds the gold, out she goes!

I learned a lot from the whole relationship.

 

[jmchavz]

you, your girl,
making out...
no sex with you
but with the others......

you fill in the blank!!!

 

[baurman]

She's right.
No MEANS NO.
It doesn't mean try again 30 seconds later.
That's rape.
If she says No, then you're done.