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She flaked (legitly) How do I let her know Im pissed?

SteveTheDon

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So I was supposed to meet this girl in my town (she lives 45 min away) she texts me that she dont get off work til 8 and its late.. I text her what about after she says she didnt realize car insurance came out so she cant split a motel... I get a red flag then she says I can go over there after if I want... so I call where she works and blocked it and she answered so I know shes not lying about that.. I texted her its far to drive and that Im going to just go out tonight and to let me know when she wants to hang out again. she texted: ok fine

So question is what do I do? text her back? wait for her to text/call? Ignore next calls/texts? Tell her it upset me she flaked? pretend nothing is wrong? treat her like crap? ask her how work was?
advice to let her know Im not happy without being a total ****?
 

kenpiffyjr

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Does she act like she likes you? Do you get the physical signals?

Honestly...I would ignore her for a little bit. Don't act like you're mad (guy getting emotional seems to only work when the chick is attached...keeps things interesting?. You really shouldn't have tried to do anything after she renigged. Should've been like "cool...just call me tomorrow" and put the ball in her court. If she didn't call...you don't need her anyway. So yea...act like its nothing would be my advice.
 

kenpiffyjr

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Does she act like she likes you? Do you get the physical signals?

Honestly...I would ignore her for a little bit. Don't act like you're mad (guy getting emotional seems to only work when the chick is attached...keeps things interesting?. You really shouldn't have tried to do anything after she renigged. Should've been like "cool...just call me tomorrow" and put the ball in her court. If she didn't call...you don't need her anyway. So yea...act like its nothing would be my advice.
 

kenpiffyjr

Senior Don Juan
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Does she act like she likes you? Do you get the physical signals?

Honestly...I would ignore her for a little bit. Don't act like you're mad (guy getting emotional seems to only work when the chick is attached...keeps things interesting?. You really shouldn't have tried to do anything after she renigged. Should've been like "cool...just call me tomorrow" and put the ball in her court. If she didn't call...you don't need her anyway. So yea...act like its nothing would be my advice.
 

SteveTheDon

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kenpiffyjr said:
Does she act like she likes you? Do you get the physical signals?

Honestly...I would ignore her for a little bit. Don't act like you're mad (guy getting emotional seems to only work when the chick is attached...keeps things interesting?. You really shouldn't have tried to do anything after she renigged. Should've been like "cool...just call me tomorrow" and put the ball in her court. If she didn't call...you don't need her anyway. So yea...act like its nothing would be my advice.

cool thanks, yeah theres physical signs and we already had sex multiple times, she calls and texts all the time.. just trying to keep her IL up.. we only been dating a few weeks..
 

SteveTheDon

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k i didnt respond to her last text heres what she wrote now:

7:00pm- Heading home have a good night love you
8:20pm- Well I guess your mad hope you have fun im gonna take a bath a relax hope to talk to you tomorrow if I dont hear from you then I guess that means its over
8:22pm Im sorry but I cant afford a motel every week I live from pay check to pay check one pays my rent the other bills.


So my question is now what do I do? I can see me not responding is affecting her. The funny thing is when we first met she said she would meet in motel once a week. Do I call her on that lie? Do I wait a few more hours tell her I just got home? Do I respond now? Do I wait for her to actually call instead of text? do I contact her tomorrow? Do I next her? Thanks
 

SteveTheDon

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also whats the best response to say where I went? I just said out... Im trying to train her and get her wrapped around my pinky and at the same time punish her for flaking,..
 

SteveTheDon

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Im thinking Ill call her later or answer if she calls and tell her to meet me at the motel tomorrow that I will pay it and we need to talk in person...... then when she comes I will address the issue and tell her that she lied etc and we need to revaluate the situation... thing is I go to her house on weekends and she said she was making me a key.. I just like to see my gfs at least once on the weekday too..
 

Diaforetikos

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Why are you mad about one missed night out. She couldn't afford to go out, so you ignore her? That seems a little immature to me. She obviously wanted to, but couldn't. Holding it against her shows you really wanted to see her, but couldn't, so now you throw a fit in hopes of her feeling like your a man in control. Sorry to disappoint, but it doesn't work that way.

Abundance mentality woulda worked in this situation. No need to be pissed. If saw that you didn't care, she would have been thrown off, assuming you were losing interest. And by her texts asking if you were mad shows she is interested, but her next text telling you that she couldn't afford to pay shows how unnecessary your anger was.
 

crazyboy

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please dont tell me this the chick that has the kids. Cus i should come through this screen and slap you if it true. But if not then obviously she doesn't have the money for a motel. Could you just go to her place or yours.

If a woman calls or text you back a reason. why shouldn't couldn't come then its not a flake. Its like calling your friend and he says he broke and can't go out. Again to much emphasis on the lady and not the situtation.
 

Chickfight

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SteveTheDon said:
So I was supposed to meet this girl in my town (she lives 45 min away) she texts me that she dont get off work til 8 and its late.. I text her what about after she says she didnt realize car insurance came out so she cant split a motel... I get a red flag then she says I can go over there after if I want... so I call where she works and blocked it and she answered so I know shes not lying about that.. I texted her its far to drive and that Im going to just go out tonight and to let me know when she wants to hang out again. she texted: ok fine

So question is what do I do? text her back? wait for her to text/call? Ignore next calls/texts? Tell her it upset me she flaked? pretend nothing is wrong? treat her like crap? ask her how work was?
advice to let her know Im not happy without being a total ****?
Listen to the others, they've pretty much covered it.

I'd like to say I'm glad to see you've had some progress in your mindset. I remember when you came here, you were so clueless that I was convinced you were a troll. Congrats, keep practicing and improving.
 

dementia

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yea, dont get pissed. She thinks your pissed and showed she didnt care, because being pissed is a DLV. I agree, she couldnt go because of $.. especially the last few texts she sent about loving you and stuff. Reply back that you were doing something and didnt see the texts and not to worry.. takes more than that to piss you off.. etc etc...be light and fun.
 
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