she appeared to have high IL now she doesn't

[pete_101]

The main problem is the OP is trying to "Buy" this chick and "impress" her while she sits back and looks "hawt" as if she is above him.

OP invests. She took. She gets loads of other chumps doing the same. She uses the better looking one while living her faux Sex and the City in demand entitled to Mr. Big who's out there somewhere for "her" nonsense.

You have to treat these chicks as disposable.

I'd met this one chick who works in Manhattan for an accounting firm as a customer in my part time job. Wound up getting her number and took her out for drinks twice. She is a hot chick, though she wound up telling me she worked at a popular strip club a while ago as a "waitress" and judging by her attitude and mention of the "finer" things I wasn't surprised in the least.

It actually had me laughing inside while she talked about the nonsense. (Everyone's an all star these days.) We made plans to meet up again though I knew I wasn't wasting my time on the chick even though we made out etc. I wasn't getting svckered into some pay for play chump as she never even fake offered to pay for half the drinks. I didn't mind as it wasn't expensive it was just the point of seeing a chick who threw up the red flag of not going to have my back if it counted.

I've seen her since then and she comes up to me smiling and trying to use her looks and "charms" as to see me again but f that. I wouldn't even waste my time to bang her. Last time she said: "I guess I'll see you around." and I said: "Yep". And never bothered contacting her again.


You choose to let these "hawt" chicks take advantage and play around with you they will.

Best thing to do is leave them where you found them and let someone else waste their time and money on them. It's not your problem anymore.

yes you're right, i naturally am courteous and thoughtful and polite (afc behavior) cos i was brought up that way so i seem to compensate by being sexually aggressive or avoid trying to do anythign expensive (i actually only spent $10 on this chick in total) and i wasn't going to take her for dinner till i'd at least slept with her (mistake i made last year was i took a girl to dinner and got nothing so from now i dont) so i come across cheap.

 

[Kbomb]

yes you're right, i naturally am courteous and thoughtful and polite (afc behavior) cos i was brought up that way so i seem to compensate by being sexually aggressive or avoid trying to do anythign expensive (i actually only spent $10 on this chick in total) and i wasn't going to take her for dinner till i'd at least slept with her (mistake i made last year was i took a girl to dinner and got nothing so from now i dont) so i come across cheap.

I don't think you should have a dinner only after sex rule. It makes you look bad. Just keep it less serious and tell women you can't eat dinner with them because you only eat with girls who give good massages. That sounds way better than the no money till play option.

Also never shoot down dinner, just be firm and say you want to go do something else, but that something else has to be fun. Like ice skating or salsa classes.

 

[nismo-4]

i had what i thought was a good date on Fri: http://www.sosuave.net/forum/showthread.php?t=198866
the post about what happened is in the last post of the thread in the thread above. she text me after our date to say: 'Hi pete, it was lovely meet you again.. thank you so much for the sushi, it was delicious...enjoy your weekend.' she sent that 1 hour after our date at 11pm, i text her back a couple hours later at 1am 'you're welcome.' (usually we reply to each other quite quicikly i.e. 20mins) during the date i made suggestion speculatively we get together on Sunday (i.e. yesterday to teach her golf but the weather was terrible i never contacted her plus it was only 2 days after our date)

so i text her today suggesting we go to a museum on Fri evening as it closes at 10pm but before then we should get together to play pool. it was quite a long text but said everythign i wanted. she texts back not too favorably after 10mins: 'Hi Pete, hope you are well, sorry but im working for the next few days till 10pm..and im out friday evening...' no counter offer, nothing.. i think she's playing hard to get a bit but that doesn't seem positive.

should i just wait till thursday and then offer something for Sunday or just wait to see if she contacts me again?

Judge nismo will happily review this case because I recently had it happen. The only difference is that I stayed in control. It's my way or the highway, she took I-75 after US 41!

First of all, Enjoy your weekend and it was nice meeting you both mean I don't want to see you any more. Also Pete, this title is pretty much men's life. No counter offer: red flag. Your princess is in another castle.

You are guilty of buying affection, failure to maintain control, long texting, and investing too much into this b**ch. The fine for this is spent money, no reciprocated feelings, a broken heart, and a trip to Hopeless Hills, Mississippi.

Spinning more plates is the best thing that is for you.

Case closed.

 

[Naughty Ninja]

yes you're right, i naturally am courteous and thoughtful and polite (afc behavior) cos i was brought up that way so i seem to compensate by being sexually aggressive or avoid trying to do anythign expensive (i actually only spent $10 on this chick in total) and i wasn't going to take her for dinner till i'd at least slept with her (mistake i made last year was i took a girl to dinner and got nothing so from now i dont) so i come across cheap.

You're "naturally courteous, thoughful, and polite" because you are looking for a chick to be indebted to you for your "niceness". (You think you're AFC slick. And it's not working.)

Chicks will either pick up the fact you're a chump or some dude who thinks he's slick and is trying to buy some azz and use the fact you're buying things for them as a control/ guilt trip into them "owing" you something.

You hang out with them a few times and see how things go. Only AFTER you've been seeing each other exclusively for a few times do you possibly offer to take her to dinner. Otherwise you are creating your own problems by investing in her and creating a pattern of being a dinner/entertainment provider when you really want some "dessert". Don't kid yourself. She has to invest her time just like you should without the money spending pressure on neither of you.

Since these chicks either see you right away trying to "impress" them with good money spent or you buying gifts their radar goes off that says: Desperate dude/ horn dog who's got ZERO game. Then YOU get pissed when you don't get anything and blame it on them.

It's all on you dude. Break that cycle of nice guy provider. You aren't fooling anyone.

 

[pete101]

Judge nismo will happily review this case because I recently had it happen. The only difference is that I stayed in control. It's my way or the highway, she took I-75 after US 41!

First of all, Enjoy your weekend and it was nice meeting you both mean I don't want to see you any more. Also Pete, this title is pretty much men's life. No counter offer: red flag. Your princess is in another castle.

You are guilty of buying affection, failure to maintain control, long texting, and investing too much into this b**ch. The fine for this is spent money, no reciprocated feelings, a broken heart, and a trip to Hopeless Hills, Mississippi.

Spinning more plates is the best thing that is for you.

Case closed.

but she didnt say 'it was nice meeting you' she said 'it was lovely meeting you again' does that still apply here?

i dont mean her specifically in general but a date after text to say 'it was lovely meeting you again' does not equal interest?

 

[Naughty Ninja]

but she didnt say 'it was nice meeting you' she said 'it was lovely meeting you again' does that still apply here?

i dont mean her specifically in general but a date after text to say 'it was lovely meeting you again' does not equal interest?

Interest equals her saying: So when are we going to hang out again?

"It was lovely meeting you again." is a cutoff statement with no hint of her planning to go out with you again.

I'd have lol'd at her saying that and responded in a wise azzed way: "Yes. It was ENCHANTING."And not bothered with her till she showed interest in wanting to meet again.

 

[pete101]

'sorry had to hang up, i were on the phoen to my sister who suggested we go for dinner tonight together.. so you and i can meet another day'

can you dissect this for me please and tell me what it actually means?

it doesnt mean she's got any IL left right?

p.s. when she said 'have a nice weekend' i thought it was a high IL text after a date.. she said it was lovely to meet me again and thanked me for the sushi and to have a good weekend.

i mean if she didn't have IL why would she thank me after our date?

girls who text you after a date surely are interested.. the 1s who dont usually arent.

she was put off by me kept saying i'll come round and cook dinner, or i'll come round and bring food.. that's the issue here too.. i needed to be more patient. she's sussed im after a quick bang.

should i respond to her last text of:

'sorry had to hang up, i were on the phoen to my sister who suggested we go for dinner tonight together.. so you and i can meet another day'

with 'ok' or 'ok. x'?

cos if i dont reply i'll look pissed off.. and i dont wanna piss her off anymore. she at least knows the score now that i wont pay for dinner.

or is the fact she hung up on me enough to next her? i.e. dont reward bad behavior.

if i dont respond and leave it leaving her thinking im brewing she's not gona contact me again cos i was stroppy.. she apologised for hanging up so she wont feel guilty but should i acknowledge the apology?

last night i sent 'ok' before i went to sleep and she texts me 'sorry?' then 'who are you?'

i was thinking wtf.. you deleted my number so you're BS text apologising for hanging up was BS and we can meet another day.. is she really p1ssed that i didn't respond to her apology text till 4 hours later she deleted my number?

i proceeded to call her to sort things out and she was asleep saying she cant talk blah blah already sleeping i woke her up call tomorrow.. i said ok, and hung up. deleted her number. im not calling this b1tch again. i dont think she was sincere with her 'you and i can meet another day' thing esp since she deleted my number.. and her response was so i'd get the msg she's not interested anymore or ever was. but when i called she didnt know who it was so it makes me think she deleted my number cos she was stroppy cos i hadn't acknowledged her apology within a time frame she deemed acceptable.

what a royal f up tbh.

 

[Kbomb]

last night i sent 'ok' before i went to sleep and she texts me 'sorry?' then 'who are you?'

i was thinking wtf.. you deleted my number so you're BS text apologising for hanging up was BS and we can meet another day.. is she really p1ssed that i didn't respond to her apology text till 4 hours later she deleted my number?

i proceeded to call her to sort things out and she was asleep saying she cant talk blah blah already sleeping i woke her up call tomorrow.. i said ok, and hung up. deleted her number. im not calling this b1tch again. i dont think she was sincere with her 'you and i can meet another day' thing esp since she deleted my number.. and her response was so i'd get the msg she's not interested anymore or ever was. but when i called she didnt know who it was so it makes me think she deleted my number cos she was stroppy cos i hadn't acknowledged her apology within a time frame she deemed acceptable.

what a royal f up tbh.

Did you read anything anyone said in this thread? All of this information you so suddenly discovered, was told to you in no unclear terms and you still refused to believe what these DJ's were saying?

What was the point of you posting on this forum again? to cry about a girl?

 

[TheWolfMan]

Lol @ Judge Nismo. OP you are a serious over-analyzer, so what if it doesn't work out with this girl? Like whats the worst that will happen? Don't be afraid to piss her off a little bit. I'm a little confused as to why the you're putting so much emphasis on whether or not you look cheap? If this girl was into you, which she clearly isn't, the fact that you are hesitant to spend money on her especially when you have just started talking to her will not affect the way she views you. I mean its not rocket scientist, first date i usually pay. If you take her on a couple dinner dates and she refuses to pay then you know she's taking you for a ride. Avoid the dinner thing altogether, and suggest just meeting up for drinks. I like to do this in the early stages of taking to girls because A. It keeps the atmosphere laid back B. you don't invest too much money into her. I actually made plans to meet up with this one girl, and my plan all along was to go out for drinks with some of her friends and some of mine. She texted me something along the lines of "Unless you want to just take me out for dinner or something". I hit her back with "I don't know, I don't just wine and dine anybody you know" and she said "Yeah guys usually don't do that stuff anymore" and without missin a beat I go "Yeah it takes a special lady to get the dinner treatment". Needless to say I'm still talking and hooking up with this girl, have yet to take her to dinner lol. I don't know OP, i feel like the whole "quick bang" ship has sailed for you on this one. Also, you're a little contradictory and appear to want to LTR this chick. You shouldnt have to work this hard for a "quick bang". Anyway NEXT her, stop wasting your time. I feel like you're looking for a special formula to get this girl in bed, and it's just not going to happen at this point.

 

[TheWolfMan]

Kbomb summed it up pretty well. I didn't read OP's last post, my last response is null and void now lol.

 

[cordoncordon]

last night i sent 'ok' before i went to sleep and she texts me 'sorry?' then 'who are you?'

i was thinking wtf.. you deleted my number so you're BS text apologising for hanging up was BS and we can meet another day.. is she really p1ssed that i didn't respond to her apology text till 4 hours later she deleted my number?

i proceeded to call her to sort things out and she was asleep saying she cant talk blah blah already sleeping i woke her up call tomorrow.. i said ok, and hung up. deleted her number. im not calling this b1tch again. i dont think she was sincere with her 'you and i can meet another day' thing esp since she deleted my number.. and her response was so i'd get the msg she's not interested anymore or ever was. but when i called she didnt know who it was so it makes me think she deleted my number cos she was stroppy cos i hadn't acknowledged her apology within a time frame she deemed acceptable.

what a royal f up tbh.

You don't listen to a thing any of us says. Why do you care to sort out anything with her? Especially when she has the nerve to ask "who are you"? after you reply?

For the love of all that is human, never contact her again and consider this a valuable lesson learned.