Sh1t test vs Flaking

[evil_tomato]

Hey guys,

I have recently been thinking about a topic that has been bothering me for a while and would like your insight on this.

I have been going out a lot lately with girls 18-24 and have met them mainly throughly online but a couple in real life with quite similar results. Now these girls have all been totally in to me, flirt with me, make suggestions about becoming my gf etc and this is all before meeting. So anyways i make a date to meet this eager chicks and the dates usually seem to be going well, lots of laughter, chemistry and most times i get the kiss close and the "ill text you later". So all seems to be going well and they will eventually message me later thanking me for a good night/day etc

But heres where the problem lies: After they meet me i dont hear from them that much or ever again. I dont bombard them with texts and i when i do try and set up second dates they all pull the same bullsh1t excuses like "i have too much going on in my life for anything serious, but we can still be friends" or "im too busy" and they never follow up and the funniest part is while their pulling these excuses on me, they're out with their friends having a good time and usually end up with other guys weeks later who arent even that great looking or have that great of a personality....

Now dont get me wrong, i value myself alot and am quite happy with who and what i am and am working on bettering myself so i dont have self esteem problems and i never show any negativity towards them and am always myself so i dont know if its cos im not passing any of their stupid little "sh1t tests" or if there is actually something wrong with me.

Lots of female friends cant figure it out either and are suprised they ditch me like that as im a good guy. So id like to know your opinions or if this happens to any of you guys aswell...

I would especially love to hear from "Ronaldo7" as i found his posts quite intriguing! so if your around ronaldo id love a reply from you! but i would like to get everyones thoughts in general because its really made me give up on bothering with girls and meet ups.

 

[zenaddict]

women on online dating sites are bombarded daily, they have the illusion that they can always get somebody better and some of them is content with the idea of being courted, since most women care more about their social status, then being happy and getting laid

if you are the guy you say you are and want women that are single and fun, go join a salsa class, there are no alpha males there, less hectic than a club, far more intimate than a party, try it out, you`ll see

 

[TillTheEndOfTime]

I can tell you from a guy with 3-4 years experience online dating that ANY reasonably attractive woman gets 100's of messages PER WEEK. Not per year. Not per month. PER WEEK.

What zenaaddict said above is on the money. Girls online have the illusion of choice. They think that they can always get the bigger better deal down the road. The reality is that they can't because they themselves are low quality girls. That reason is precisely why they aren't girlfriended up offline through some social circle. Because no guy who personally knows them wants to go near them due to issues, drama, etc....even if they are attractive. That's how terrible their personality appears to be to the outside man.

These are girls who's reputation is pretty much ruined offline, so they need validation from some poor saps and go through guy to guy online. If you don't compliment and chase them like crazy, you will NEVER hear from them again because guess what? While you were taking a sh1t, they just got another 10 messages from guys equally as attractive as you in her eyes....or maybe even more attractive.

So why would she settle? The answer is, they DON'T. Unless you are WAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAY out of their league in terms of looks and money, they always think they deserve more.

Even if they are a 6/10 and unemployed.

All the above is why I don't touch online dating with a 500 foot pole.

I accidentally clicked on an ad for online dating the other week.

I REFORMATTED MY HARD DRIVE.

 

[Kbomb]

You are stuck in the not beyond first date zone. Something you are doing wrong is making these girls not see you as either LTR material, or as hot **** material. It is not them, it is you. Figure out what your doing wrong.

As an example, you are probably being too nice, or you are being too clingy, or you aren't offering fun conversation, Your not initiating physically, etc etc.

 

[bigneil]

Does she touch you during the date? If not, you're dead in the water as Doc Love says. Does she compliment you? Does she kiss you at the end of the date? Does she make future plans together? Doc says you need to hit on 3 out of 4.

 

[evil_tomato]

But its not just online dating that its happening, its girls offline too or on fb.
and for the life of me i cant understand where im going wrong. Yeah i can be too nice but most of the time yeh i do get kisses throughout the date or they always bring up plans for the future, and sometimes they flirt and some dont....i mean its even happening with 6's aswell...

All my friends say that im attractive and a good guy. I work and know where im going in life and can hold a decent conversation with pretty much anyone. And funny enough i am not clingy at all, i used to be but i changed that. They are the ones who were always messaging me, dying to meet up.

Sometimes im afraid of making moves only because i dont know if she wants me to and i dont want to get slapped or make things awkward lol...

But yeah its just funny cos the recent girl whose done this is no more then a 6.5, with an average personality and yet the other guys shes dated arent even that great. Average looks and from what i know crappy personality but has status....Which i know if you have status no matter how ugly or crappy your personality is, you still can pull off hot babes

 

[Fatal Jay]

I can tell you from a guy with 3-4 years experience online dating that ANY reasonably attractive woman gets 100's of messages PER WEEK. Not per year. Not per month. PER WEEK.

What zenaaddict said above is on the money. Girls online have the illusion of choice. They think that they can always get the bigger better deal down the road. The reality is that they can't because they themselves are low quality girls. That reason is precisely why they aren't girlfriended up offline through some social circle. Because no guy who personally knows them wants to go near them due to issues, drama, etc....even if they are attractive. That's how terrible their personality appears to be to the outside man.

These are girls who's reputation is pretty much ruined offline, so they need validation from some poor saps and go through guy to guy online. If you don't compliment and chase them like crazy, you will NEVER hear from them again because guess what? While you were taking a sh1t, they just got another 10 messages from guys equally as attractive as you in her eyes....or maybe even more attractive.

So why would she settle? The answer is, they DON'T. Unless you are WAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAY out of their league in terms of looks and money, they always think they deserve more.

Even if they are a 6/10 and unemployed.

All the above is why I don't touch online dating with a 500 foot pole.

I accidentally clicked on an ad for online dating the other week.

I REFORMATTED MY HARD DRIVE.

This dude needs a f*cking award for this masterpiece of a post. I'm against online dating myself, I tried pof.com but those girls on there are weak, the girls are just like you said low quality women who believe they are celebs, the beautiful thing about it is,these girls will remain single for the rest of their lives ruining relationships they do have,so I much rather go out.

 

[bigneil]

It's true that women have the advantage. How much of an advantage? Well, the black market has determined that it's about a $500 advantage for an average man ($300 for a good looking man). That's why I have no problem paying (sometimes). It evens the playing field. It gets young hotties half your age chasing you. You still need to be successful to have the extra money, and you still need to be someone they genuinely like to enjoy yourself with them (especially in bed). There is no joy being with someone who is not attracted to you because 70% of communication is body language.

 

[casaanova]

when i do try and set up second dates they all pull the same bullsh1t excuses like "i have too much going on in my life for anything serious, but we can still be friends" or "im too busy"

Those are soft rejections, or smokescreens women use to basically say "thank you for the date, but I don't want to see you again". You have to take a good look at your own game and figure out where you made a misstep if you're consistently getting rejections - and not get mad at the women for rejecting you. All good DJs and players have to look at what they're doing wrong at one point or another. To me it sounds like you're not escalating enough - are you kinoing consistently? When you kiss close, is it only a peck, or are you making out? Are you using compliance tests? Are you at least making an attempt to bring the date back to your place (whether she accepts or denies)? All this matters to the way she judges your game - because if you don't do any of this just for the sake of being safe, and the next guy does, she will be devoting all her attention to him even if she turns him down the first date. You have to be the driver, and let her tell you where she's getting off

 

[evil_tomato]

When I kiss close it's always a make out, and I do kino quite a bit, I have asked them for second dates whilst I'm on the date with them and they always reply excitingly with yes until I go back home and they pull their ****. I talk to them.how I do before the meet up when they were completely in to me and sometimes I am more flirty but I don't go overboard cos I can.usually sense when they aren't in to me.