Sh*t Test vs. No Interest: How to tell the difference

Harry Wilmington

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Okay, I haven't seen this topic talked about on these boards as of late, but I think it should have some attention.

I read a lot of articles on here, and one thing I keep coming across is questions as to whether or not a girl is throwing a sh!t test of some kind. The scenario is usually the same: guy meets girl, girl shows interest, then girl does something that indicates her interest in him is questionable. Guy now ponders if her actions indicate some sort of testing by her to see if he's worthy.

7 times out of 10, I read these things and just shake my head...

I think guys on here are confused as to what a sh!t test is verses when a girl is just not interested. The majority of guys who believe themselves to be going through a sh!t test are really just dealing with girls that have low to no interest in them.

Why do I say that? Because - and here's where the mind-bending irony comes into play - sh!t test are only given by girls when they're INTERESTED in you.

"Huh? Wha?" You ask. "But... but how can that BE?!?"

A sh!t test is given when a girl actually has high interest in a guy, but needs to know what kind of temperament he has. After all, a girl doesn't want to deal with a guy seems nice but may turn out to be an abusive a-hole later* (this applies to sane girls, not ones who are looking to be with abusers). Therefore, she may do something that seems out of her behavior for a short time, but ONLY as a means to see his reaction.

If a girl is giving a guy a TRUE sh!t test, it will only be for a limited amount of time. More importantly, though, it's a test designed solely to see in what way you handle situations that may pertain to her and you later (i.e. being able to protect her, dealing with her being fussy so she'll know how you'll handle your kids when they're fussy later on, etc.)

They are NOT - I repeat, NOT - test designed to give you implications that she may be interested in another guy, or that she's hard to tame. And sadly, most of the questionable "sh!t" test I see guys going through on this board are just examples of girls showing their disinterest but not having the heart to tell them to their faces.

So how can you tell the difference between a sh!t test verses a lack of interest? Peep these two stories:

STORY #1: A guy and a girl go to a pool party. When they get there, they discover that everyone is lounging AROUND the pool, but no one's actually in the water. The guy, not caring what others think, decides he still wants to go in the pool. The girl, on the other hand, would feel embarrassed being the only one in the pool. She tells her guy, "I don't think we should go in the pool; let's just sit on the side of it instead."

STORY #2: A guy goes on a date with a girl, and they appear to have a good time. The next time he calls her up, he asks her "so, what are you doing tonight?" Her response: "Eh, I'm going out with this guy I met down town. Don't worry, he's just a friend I met at a bar the other day - he says he wanted to show me this awesome club near where he lives, so I figure I'd check it out."

Now, which one of these is a sh!t test, and which one of these is a girl showing a lack of interest? Go ahead, re-read them, take a guess, and scroll down...

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So, have you figured it out? Here's the answer:

STORY #1 is a sh!t test. It's a test to see if he will let her dictate the activities they do, when they do them, and under what circumstances they will occur. Why is this test necessary? A girl wants a guy who's a leader, and needs to make sure from time to time that he really is, in fact, a guy who will do what he wants to do.

In this test, if the guy goes along with her plan to not get in the pool, he will come off as the weak one, and she will now have the power in the relationship to make the decisions. If the guy does what he wants to do, she will respect him for it and is actually more likely to follow his lead and get in the pool.

STORY #2 is dealing with a girl who's not really interested in the guy. If she was, she wouldn't have told him she had another date that night.

Now, some guys will read that and think, "but what if it was just a sh!t test to see how jealous he would get?" Oooh, sorry, but you'd be wrong. For one, it's too early in the dating process to be testing the whole "jealousy" thing.

Second - and perhaps more importantly - if a girl wants you to think she's available to you, she will NOT MENTION OTHER DUDES SHE'S SEEING. If she does, it's because she's NOT really that into you and wants you to go away.

However, girls aren't very good at being able to say the word "no" to a guy. Instead, she'll do or say other things in hopes you'll get the hint that she's not interested. (I'll be typing up a post about this topic later.)

Bottom line: testing is for guys she's looking to KEEP around. If she's making out with other dudes in front of you, or telling you about other dates she has, or suddenly flaking out on dates, she's NOT sh!t testing you, she's hoping to get RID of you. Don't take it personally, just know what it is and find another plate to spin!

-Harry Wilmington
 

youngmack

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Story 2 can also be a sh1t test too bro. Girls dont like jealous/insecure guys so she can she say all these things bout guys chasing her or she goes on dates with these guys to test your confidence. Sometimes these stories can be true and some not true.

But whether they're true or not you gotta keep your composure because the girl isnt obligated to you.She isnt your GF or wife so she can date any # of dudes just like u can date any # of broads. *just my 2 pennies*
 

Zerro

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youngmack said:
Story 2 can also be a sh1t test too bro. Girls dont like jealous/insecure guys so she can she say all these things bout guys chasing her or she goes on dates with these guys to test your confidence. Sometimes these stories can be true and some not true.
Any woman who is interested but pulling jealous games on you ain't worth your time anyway. If it's a test then it is one that SHE is failing.
 

Harry Wilmington

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At some point a girl WILL test a guy to see if he's the jealous type - but not by telling him she's going out with other dudes. It's counter-productive.

A jealousy test would be after you've gone out with her for a while when you start doing more social stuff together where other people are around. For example, you two go to a party, and she starts talking to a guy friend of hers there.

THIS would be an example of her testing for jealousy, especially if you've never been around her when she talks to friends of hers who happen to be guys. In this scenario, if you give off any signs of jealousy or anger that she's talking to another guy - one she's not even thinking about getting with - then you fail.

However, if you act rationally - after all, there are only two sexes, so you only have 2 options of people to be friends with - and like it's no big deal ('cause it isn't), she knows you won't go all psycho on her when she's JUST talking to another guy.

The scenario above is DRASTICALLY DIFFERENT from a girl you just met telling you, "Oh, I'm going out with x, y, and z guy this week." Again, it's counter-productive for her to do so if she likes you. In the beginning she very well may be dating 3 or 4 other guys... but she's not going to SAY that to any of the guys she's interested in keeping around.

If she does mention it, though, she's not showing respect towards you. And she's not showing respect towards you because she doesn't really care how you feel. And she doesn't really care how you feel because she's not really trying to keep you around in the first place.
 

Poonani Maker

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Harry Wilmington said:
However, girls aren't very good at being able to say the word "no" to a guy. Instead, she'll do or say other things in hopes you'll get the hint that she's not interested. (I'll be typing up a post about this topic later.)
This is Why girls are crueler than guys...it's like pouring salt in the guy's wound by beating around the bush. "Hinting" is abusive and She Knows It!
 

Harry Wilmington

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Poonani Maker said:
"Hinting" is abusive and She Knows It!
LoL. Ironically, when women hint something to a guy, they're not trying to be abusive. In the girl world, hinting is how they communicate with each other because coming out direct in relationship to something (other than their feelings) gets them viewed as a biznich.

Example: If a girl says to another girl friend, "Let's go to the beach today!" and the other girl says "I don't feel like going to the beach" and leaves it at that, she looks like an a-hole to the girl who suggested it. However, if she says "Hmm, are you sure the water won't ruin our hair?," the other girl gets that her friend is trying to get out of going to the beach.

This is why it's good for men to know women's communication styles. Like I said, they don't want to come across as d!cks or bruise a man's ego by telling him "no," which is why she'll use hints instead. To a guy, it's dumb (and I tell girls all the time that it would be better for them to just tell "no" directly), but that's not going to make her change how she communicates.
 

Poonani Maker

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Harry Wilmington said:
LoL. Ironically, when women hint something to a guy, they're not trying to be abusive. In the girl world, hinting is how they communicate with each other because coming out direct in relationship to something (other than their feelings) gets them viewed as a biznich.

Example: If a girl says to another girl friend, "Let's go to the beach today!" and the other girl says "I don't feel like going to the beach" and leaves it at that, she looks like an a-hole to the girl who suggested it. However, if she says "Hmm, are you sure the water won't ruin our hair?," the other girl gets that her friend is trying to get out of going to the beach.

This is why it's good for men to know women's communication styles. Like I said, they don't want to come across as d!cks or bruise a man's ego by telling him "no," which is why she'll use hints instead. To a guy, it's dumb (and I tell girls all the time that it would be better for them to just tell "no" directly), but that's not going to make her change how she communicates.
I think you give them too much credit. How many times have you texted a gal and she completely omits certain parts of your text as if she "overlooked" what you wrote, just to fvck with you? to make you call her out on her intentional apathy towards what you wrote?? I'll call her out! and not worry about upsetting her thereby cutting off all chances with her. I get pretty fvckin sick of b!tches intentionally NOT READING what I wrote to them, just to fvck with me. I'm like, "Can't you fvcking read??" Of course, the game-playing hoe never answers back to that, and I never hear from her again. Good! I have others. I will NOT kow-tow to stupid b!tches' behavior!

If she's not Clear with you then, how clear will she ever be?!
 

The Gambler

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Harry Wilmington said:
STORY #1: A guy and a girl go to a pool party. When they get there, they discover that everyone is lounging AROUND the pool, but no one's actually in the water. The guy, not caring what others think, decides he still wants to go in the pool. The girl, on the other hand, would feel embarrassed being the only one in the pool. She tells her guy, "I don't think we should go in the pool; let's just sit on the side of it instead."
There are times where a woman's actions can just be taken at face value... You yourself gave the background info of the woman feeling embarrassed in this situation. If that's the case, I doubt the woman would look poorly upon the man because he was considerate of her and her feelings.

I'm not trying to micro analyze anything, because I see your point, but men need to try to be aware of a woman's motive when she has a request.

The Gambler
 

bigneil

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If she shows you another man just say "he seems like a good guy" or "he's a good looking guy". Never insult him as that insults her and makes you appear weak.

If you are curious if she is having second thoughts just ask her in person "Do you want to end it?" She'll either say "No!" or "I don't know..." (Yes). It's not the end of the world if you get answer 2, just go NC until she's ready to see you again.
 

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Poonani Maker said:
I think you give them too much credit. How many times have you texted a gal and she completely omits certain parts of your text as if she "overlooked" what you wrote, just to fvck with you? to make you call her out on her intentional apathy towards what you wrote?? I'll call her out! and not worry about upsetting her thereby cutting off all chances with her. I get pretty fvckin sick of b!tches intentionally NOT READING what I wrote to them, just to fvck with me. I'm like, "Can't you fvcking read??" Of course, the game-playing hoe never answers back to that, and I never hear from her again. Good! I have others. I will NOT kow-tow to stupid b!tches' behavior!

If she's not Clear with you then, how clear will she ever be?!

Fvckinf agreed man! You have to call them out on it too , that sh1t pissed me off too. Fcck caring about what your words will do to her, she omits part of what you type just to mess with you, yeah well that doesn't fly with me. I had this happen to me before , plenty of times and you ha e to do something about it
 

Peace and Quiet

If you currently have too many women chasing you, calling you, harassing you, knocking on your door at 2 o'clock in the morning... then I have the simple solution for you.

Just read my free ebook 22 Rules for Massive Success With Women and do the opposite of what I recommend.

This will quickly drive all women away from you.

And you will be able to relax and to live your life in peace and quiet.

Packers2010

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The Gambler said:
There are times where a woman's actions can just be taken at face value... You yourself gave the background info of the woman feeling embarrassed in this situation. If that's the case, I doubt the woman would look poorly upon the man because he was considerate of her and her feelings.

I'm not trying to micro analyze anything, because I see your point, but men need to try to be aware of a woman's motive when she has a request.

The Gambler
i got what the op was saying and it helped me.. but it's true you have to take the motive into account too.
 

Jay Dee

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JohnChops said:
Poonani Maker said:
I think you give them too much credit. How many times have you texted a gal and she completely omits certain parts of your text as if she "overlooked" what you wrote, just to fvck with you? to make you call her out on her intentional apathy towards what you wrote?? I'll call her out! and not worry about upsetting her thereby cutting off all chances with her. I get pretty fvckin sick of b!tches intentionally NOT READING what I wrote to them, just to fvck with me. I'm like, "Can't you fvcking read??" Of course, the game-playing hoe never answers back to that, and I never hear from her again. Good! I have others. I will NOT kow-tow to stupid b!tches' behavior!

If she's not Clear with you then, how clear will she ever be?!
Fvckinf agreed man! You have to call them out on it too , that sh1t pissed me off too. Fcck caring about what your words will do to her, she omits part of what you type just to mess with you, yeah well that doesn't fly with me. I had this happen to me before , plenty of times and you ha e to do something about it
I thought the aim was to get to the honeypot by which ever means, but as Poonani admits, calling them out on it doesn't quite get you there. So don't be logical, or take it personal, just play the game a bit... stop talking for a day or 2 to indicate that she's done something wrong, then start again like it never happened and persist for a little while. Once you hit it she'll behave a bit better I tend to see.
 

DonJuanabe

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bigneil -- even that doesn't necessarily work. I was dating a girl and could sense things were deteriorating based on her behavior. I told her "Look, if you're not interested that's fine, I'll leave and I won't call you anymore, no worries." Her response "I am interested, I don't want you to leave and I want you to keep calling me." Just over a week later it was over because she was infatuated with some other guy. As an aside: some six weeks later we were talking and I confronted her on that conversation and repeated the quote above. Her reply? "I don't remember saying that." Note how she didn't say that she DIDN'T say it, only that she doesn't remember, which she can easily convolute in her mind to mean it wasn't on her mind until I brought it up. My response to her: "Bull****."
 

DonJuanabe

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"Eh, I'm going out with this guy I met down town. Don't worry, he's just a friend I met at a bar the other day - he says he wanted to show me this awesome club near where he lives, so I figure I'd check it out."

I think this is more akin to competing interests more than lack of interest, but it is a major warning sign. If someone is really just a friend she will not bring him up in conversation to you. If she is feeling conflicted then she will bring him up as just a friend, which should alert you that the only reason he is just a friend is because you are in the picture -- if you weren't she'd be f*cking his brains out.
 

Who Dares Win

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Interesting thread, congrats to op and those who enriched it.

I wonder what is your opinion about girls who dont return texts and the following conversation they prented nothing happened or they appear back after weeks with same moment invitations like "Im in this place come to meet".

I would lean more to the no interest/boredom than the sh1t test but its never bad to listen other opinions.
 

You essentially upped your VALUE in her eyes by showing her that, if she wants you, she has to at times do things that you like to do. You are SOMETHING after all. You are NOT FREE. If she wants to hang with you, it's going to cost her something — time, effort, money.

Quote taken from The SoSuave Guide to Women and Dating, which you can read for FREE.

Poonani Maker

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Who Dares Win said:
Interesting thread, congrats to op and those who enriched it.

I wonder what is your opinion about girls who dont return texts and the following conversation they prented nothing happened or they appear back after weeks with same moment invitations like "Im in this place come to meet".

I would lean more to the no interest/boredom than the sh1t test but its never bad to listen other opinions.
Man, I had that happen to me last week/this weekend with one hot young one. Early/middle of the week last week, she was warm to doing something this weekend. Didn't get back with me on it until Friday or Thursday (I forget exactly, but at least 48 hours had transpired - I only message/call once! none of this constant pestering a girl...I'll just move on to another when one doesn't respond). So I compliment her, get us closer to meeting up, and believe everything's a go for yesterday based on her interest levels (though she's a little mentally off, her speech/grammar, at 25 still high school level, she likes dubstep one of those chained to her mp3 chicks constantly listening to music, smokes pot).

So she (not really flakes me) just doesn't answer me back for yesterday over a span of 24-36 hours). So This Morning, she finally gets around to answering me from a day or 2 ago (but hey, you know what b!tch? it's toooo late???...she thinks that I can still do something today, even though I'd been shootin for yesterday all week!) In her typical broken English.

My thinking is that she went with some other dude (possibly fvcked him, bad lay) last night and now, this morning, is trying to switch back over to her 2nd choice, me, to help her get herself back into her groove after a bad night. Umm, no! fvckin airhead had her chance. I may see about next weekend, but for now, she fvcked herself with me. She'd better hope I don't find another, better, gal in the next few days after her being so wishy-washy with me last week. I tried to get with a 1st choice, for me, 21 yr old short Cali chick, yesterday but she as well was even more apathetic, as was all others I'd tried. Just not looking good for me the past 2 weeks, so I'm shooting my guns, mountain biking, and yard work.
 

Harry Wilmington

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Hey all:

Wow, so many responses. I actually tried responding to this yesterday, but SS has this "10 post per day" rule (which they didn't have back in the day - wow, that makes me sound old, LoL) and had to wait.

Now there's a lot more to respond to. One at a time, though...

Poonani Maker said:
I think you give them too much credit. How many times have you texted a gal and she completely omits certain parts of your text as if she "overlooked" what you wrote, just to fvck with you? to make you call her out on her intentional apathy towards what you wrote?? I'll call her out! and not worry about upsetting her thereby cutting off all chances with her. I get pretty fvckin sick of b!tches intentionally NOT READING what I wrote to them, just to fvck with me. I'm like, "Can't you fvcking read??" Of course, the game-playing hoe never answers back to that, and I never hear from her again. Good! I have others. I will NOT kow-tow to stupid b!tches' behavior! If she's not Clear with you then, how clear will she ever be?!
I wrote a post about this already called "Texting is KILLING your chances with her." So, to answer your question, I don't have problems like this anymore because I don't text girls. I call them or they call me. Or, if they text me and it seems like they're wanting to have a long conversation I'll call them. I train them by letting them text me, then not responding for a few hours, calling them and saying "oh yeah, I got your text, but I was busy and wanted to give you my full attention. Plus, I much prefer making phone calls so nothing I say gets misinterpreted." BOOM, problem solved.

However, the important thing to note here is this: if she's purposefully ignoring or leaving out parts of a text you sent her... it's 'cause she's NOT all that interested in you. Here's the problem: the male ego doesn't want to believe that a woman would appear to show interest then suddenly take it away. But they do. And when it happens, they're not going to want to tell you because they can't really explain WHY they suddenly don't like you, nor do they want to verbalize it to you. They'd rather just ignore your text and calls instead and hope you get the hint.

This is why its good to know that WOMEN COMMUNICATE THEIR DESIRES VIA HINTING. This isn't an excuse for their actions, it's literally what they do.

Mini-example: when I was little, if my Dad (R.I.P.) wanted me to take out the trash, he'd say, "Hey, you, go take out the trash." Direct, easy to understand. Meanwhile, if my Mom wanted me to take out the trash, you know how she'd tell me to do it?

Answer: she wouldn't. Instead, she'd say something like, "Man, that trash is starting to get full," or "wow, that trash smells bad! I think it needs to be taken out...." Not direct, but hinted at, with the hopes that I'd understand it's ME who she wants to take out the trash.

Guys can't wait for a woman to be direct with him when it comes to rejection because that's not the way they're used to communicating (except when it comes to their feelings, which is something WE tend to hint at). Just assume if she's not saying "yes" or responding the right way to your texts/calls that she's not interested.

Speaking of hinting...

Gambler said:
Quote:
Originally Posted by Harry Wilmington

STORY #1: A guy and a girl go to a pool party. When they get there, they discover that everyone is lounging AROUND the pool, but no one's actually in the water. The guy, not caring what others think, decides he still wants to go in the pool. The girl, on the other hand, would feel embarrassed being the only one in the pool. She tells her guy, "I don't think we should go in the pool; let's just sit on the side of it instead."

There are times where a woman's actions can just be taken at face value... You yourself gave the background info of the woman feeling embarrassed in this situation. If that's the case, I doubt the woman would look poorly upon the man because he was considerate of her and her feelings.

I'm not trying to micro analyze anything, because I see your point, but men need to try to be aware of a woman's motive when she has a request.
This is still a sh!t test. It's not so much about the fact that the woman feels embarrassed and doesn't want to get in the pool; the sh!t test is her suggestion that "WE" shouldn't get in the pool. It's a test to see if you're going to (a) let her change the plans you had already set out for y'all to do, and (b) if you're going to be a follower and only do things that are pleasing to her, or if you're going to be your own man and do the things you desire to do (as it pertains to not hurting anyone, of course).

It doesn't seem like a test at first because her request seems so innocent that you may not think much of it. But the sentence is really her HINTING out a test to you. (Note: this is based on a situation that actually happened to me with a girl I dated. And the results of the scenario played out just like they did in the original post: I got in the pool, some other hot chicks got in the pool with me, and a few minutes later my date's butt was in the pool, too. Gotta love it when girls compete!)

Onto the next poster...
 

Harry Wilmington

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bigneil said:
If she shows you another man just say "he seems like a good guy" or "he's a good looking guy". Never insult him as that insults her and makes you appear weak.
Yeah, I NEVER say this anymore. Mostly 'cause I tend to date girls I know are available. But, when it does happen, I'm definitely not going to call him good looking - it's already disrespectful that she's showing me another dude she's dating, no need for me to give him props as well!

If you are curious if she is having second thoughts just ask her in person "Do you want to end it?" She'll either say "No!" or "I don't know..." (Yes). It's not the end of the world if you get answer 2, just go NC until she's ready to see you again.
LoL - if she's not looking to see you anymore, NC is pointless 'cause she's not going to want to contact you anyway!

I think people on here have a misconception about how to use NC, much in the same way they get confused about what a sh!t test is. NC is only used effectively on girls that ACTUALLY WANT TO BE WITH YOU, but are acting bratty. If a girl isn't returning your text or calls or wanting to hang around you, SHE'S the one that's already NCing you.

JohnChops said:
(Agreeing with Poonani Maker's post) Fvckinf agreed man! You have to call them out on it too , that sh1t pissed me off too. F--k caring about what your words will do to her, she omits part of what you type just to mess with you, yeah well that doesn't fly with me. I had this happen to me before , plenty of times and you ha e to do something about it
Again, if she's omiting quotes, she's not trying to mess with you. Literally - she's NOT TRYING TO MESS WITH YOU. As in, she doesn't really want to be with you. You think she'd be doing that crap if friggin' Robert Pattinson or (insert name of her favorite celebrity crush) sent her a text? You have to put yourself up to that level of importance, 'cause a girl that REALLY likes you will do the same.

As for calling girls on their sh!t? Eh, you COULD do that, but it doesn't really prove anything. If she is B.S.ing you she has low interest and isn't trying to get with you. And if you call her out on it, you'll get a mini-ego boost for being right, and she STILL won't be trying to get with you. Not exactly a win-win.

I just stop communicating altogether. No need in sending a text or leaving a message to her cursing and yelling and being like "ah ha! I got you!" Those text and calls will be shared with her girlfriends, and the last thing any guy needs is to have evidence going around that he acts like an AFC when he doesn't get his way with a chick.

But wait! There's more...

DonJuanabe said:
"Eh, I'm going out with this guy I met down town. Don't worry, he's just a friend I met at a bar the other day - he says he wanted to show me this awesome club near where he lives, so I figure I'd check it out."

I think this is more akin to competing interests more than lack of interest, but it is a major warning sign. If someone is really just a friend she will not bring him up in conversation to you. If she is feeling conflicted then she will bring him up as just a friend, which should alert you that the only reason he is just a friend is because you are in the picture -- if you weren't she'd be f*cking his brains out.
I'm glad you brought this up. In my example, I purposefully made the girl say the sentence the way I did to prove a point: GUYS DON'T PICK UP ON THINGS GIRLS SAY THAT INDICATES THEY'RE EITHER NOT INTERESTED OR LYING TO THEM.

In the story, the guy and girl have gone out on one date. This indicates they probably met one time prior to them going out.

Re-read that: they met once, he got the number, asked her out, and they had a date.

So, when he calls the next time, what does she say she's up to? SHE'S GOING OUT WITH A "FRIEND" SHE MET AT THE BAR THE OTHER DAY.

Now, I don't know about you, but most friendships don't just happen in a day; they build up over time. And girls aren't typically in the market to be doing one-on-one hangouts with a guy they just met...

UNLESS SHE'S INTERESTED IN HIM.

Therefore, this guy - who she's only met ONE time and is now taking her out - isn't just in the "friend" category. If anything, he's in the same category as the guy who made the phone call. After all, HE met her ONE time and then went out, and now THIS guy has met her ONE time and is going out.

In effect, this girl is LYING to the guy on the phone about her interest in the guy. More importantly, she's TELLING HIM ABOUT ANOTHER GUY, which is a big no-no if you want the guy to be attracted to you. Again, don't think that girls don't know what they're doing at times - if she's doing this, it's a red flag and a HUGE hint that her interest in you may not be all there.

Lastly...

Who Dares Win said:
I wonder what is your opinion about girls who dont return texts and the following conversation they pretend nothing happened or they appear back after weeks with same moment invitations like "Im in this place come to meet".

I would lean more to the no interest/boredom than the sh1t test but its never bad to listen other opinions.
This, again, is the problem with texting. But, to answer your question: if I text a girl and I don't hear back from her the next day: eh, no big deal. We all get busy.

If I text a girl and she doesn't respond for a few days, major red flag. Unless she just arrived here from the past, most people have cell phones that work. And even then it's not an excuse - during times when I was without a phone I'd use google voice or email to hit up girls and get dates. (Yes, I was still getting dates when I didn't have a phone - kinda makes the whole "Oh, I don't have a phone" excuse sound even MORE B.S.ish, right?)

If a girl goes away for weeks then suddenly reappears, it signals to me that she had other plates she was spinning and none of them worked out, so now I'm her "reliable" back up. I don't even respond to those text at this point.

Yes, some may say "but man, what if she's DTF at that moment?" Forget her, I got other girls I can bang that showed me more respect than her flaky behind. Responding to her every beck and call, or being readily available whenever she decides its time to show you attention, sets up a bad precedent, one that will lead back to her being disinterested in you again.

Whew! That was a LOT to respond to. Feel free to add in more comments!

-Harry Wilmington

P.S. I'm putting together a blog site that will be giving you guys some more FREE advice I feel will help as you navigate through the dating world. Stay tuned :rockon:
 

JohnChops

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Would she do that to robert pattison ? Most likely not but yeah not communicating with her is the better way to go. Its just annoying that they do that, but I guess we could always just simply walk away.... the best thing a man could do and the most powerful thing he can do.
 

Trump

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Harry Wilmington said:
This is still a sh!t test. It's not so much about the fact that the woman feels embarrassed and doesn't want to get in the pool; the sh!t test is her suggestion that "WE" shouldn't get in the pool. It's a test to see if you're going to (a) let her change the plans you had already set out for y'all to do, and (b) if you're going to be a follower and only do things that are pleasing to her, or if you're going to be your own man and do the things you desire to do (as it pertains to not hurting anyone, of course).
Think you are over analyzing on women's tests. There is a difference between testing you and feeling comfortable with you. If the girl wants you to stay with her and protect her and not get in the pool, don't think you should say go to hell I am doing what I want. It's all perspective and depends on the situation.

This site has made every word out of a woman's mouth a test. She wants to go grocery shopping...test. She wants to watch tv...test. She wants to do something fun...test. Women are people, just like us.
 
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