Serious Oneitis - Looking for some feedback

[epic_barrels]

Hey,
I have been having a blast the last year, banging lots of girls and working on improving myself in every way possible. Everything is going great in my life...until I found myself with a case of bad oneitis. hah

Basically, I met this girl at work..she is subbing at my school. I don't know what the hell happened to me..but I find myself falling for this girl.

I worked it perfectly...pulled her in to my cool world, kept mysterious, did not chase her, nailed her, etc. Now I find myself constantly thinking about her and overanalyzing my every move..I find myself fighting the urge to chase, call, text..etc. Basically, staying cool and now showing some burried AFC characteristics I used to have.

She def had a high interest level in me..but lately she has been running hot and cold which is driving me nuts. She hasn't done anything yet to disrespect me..i would walk away in a second and she knows that. I just find myself losing some power and doubting myself at times..this is coming after months of very high confidence.

Maybe it is because she is a HB9/10 with a lot going for her..She knows it too. Sometimes I feel out of her league, and I have to constantly remind myself of how much of a catch I am.

I know I need to spin more plates right now...but it is hard when I can't get this chick out of my head. I am 31 and feel myself losing frame..

For you DJ's, a little advice would be good. Should I distance myself? Back off a bit?.. I just want to stop thinking so much.

Thanks dudes

 

[Johnny_Kage]

Sometimes I feel out of her league, and I have to constantly remind myself of how much of a catch I am.

There's your problem. You'll never get a girl with this kind of mindset. Usually, I find that if you get to this point, it's extremely hard to get back to your player self around the particular chick. But you could try though. If I were you, I would just go for it hardcore and let the chips fall where they may. If she's as interested in you as you think she is, then it should work fine anyway.

And take her off that damn pedestal. She might be hot with a lot going for her, but she's just a chick...and she does have flaws, trust me.

JK

 

[Isko]

Count yourself lucky, man... This is an opportunity for you to reinforce your awesomeness. Dating this girl is a challenge for you; if it wasn't, you wouldn't be interested in her. I'm sure she feels the same about you. Being around her makes you be on your "best" (coolest) behavior. It's an opportunity to learn and practice being happy and awesome. Practice not getting needy or changing yourself, even for such an awesome girl as her. Practice being confident and listening to yourself and doing what you wanna do.

Plus you're dating a girl who you're super attracted to.

 

[Kailex]

Epic, start spinning more plates NOW.

I went through this a month ago, and it was NOT fun. Yes, she's awesome and all that, but she's also human. If you find yourself thinking too much about her, it's because you have nothing to do with that time. Occupy yourself with stuff to do, go out with other people at the same time.

I was dating this girl that was "perfect" and was on the road to oneitis, and then with the advice of sosuave.net users and things that happened on the way, I noticed that she wasn't ALL THAT even though she was VERY attractive and had all the qualities of a woman that I love.

And now, we don't even talk. It's just an after-thought, and even though I haven't dated an HB9 like her, the others have been a LOT more fun to be around, less stress, less drama, less oneitis ;-)

 

[epic_barrels]

thanks guys..yeah i totally have to do some serious sarging and get my usual rotation of 3-4 chicks up and running.

stay busy..live the dj life by endulging in my hobbies and not giving a f*ck about a woman.

hopefully that will get my oneitis in check

 

[NeedToImprove]

they are like a itch you can't scratch, they are always there in your mind no matter what you do and you tend to overanalyze every step you made. wtf went wrong? why did her interest level dropped? maybe it wasnt your fault it's just wasnt meant to be, not the right girl for you but even if you fuc**d up? we are always learning or we wouldnt be here. if you keep yourself busy doing things you like its more likely you wont think about that girl that much.

why so many over analyzing posts lately?

 

[epic_barrels]

here is an little update..
so we had a big snowstorm here and i picked her up, picked up some beer and went sledding..It was really fun..Somehow we ended up kissing at the bottom of the hill and she started telling me that she "hates playing games" and that she does not want to play games with me anymore. she told me she really likes me and she was getting the feeling that i was intentionally messing with her by giving her very vague answers at times and using dj tactics to keep a girl wondering.

so now she pretty much showed me her cards...i really like her..i think she is gf material..i just gonna keep my guard up and make sure i dont give away my power. i just gonna back off on some of the gaming..i have her already.

 

[NeedToImprove]

congratulations mate,good work.

 

[TizZle]

the game never stops..

 

[SchoolBoy]

its a trap... continue gaming, if u don't and decide to stop, u just failed a sh1t test...

"I have her already" is a mindset of people who pass the first stage of sh1t test and forget about the most deadly one of all.

There's a thread somewhere here which refers to that type of sh1t test when you let your guard down.

Her telling you she doens't wnana play games anymore really means "I don't want you to play games with me anymore, but I wanna continue it with you"

Rule of thumb is.. however u acted to get a girl attracted to you in the first place, don't change!! DO NOT CHANGE how u acted when u first got her all wet over you.. once u do, she'll see thru you.. and feel decieved.