Seeing your ex macking someone else.

[iqqi]

there are two great reasons NOT to call or contact her.

1. She doesn't give a fcuk anyways, so you will save yourself the chumpness of that action. and she will be aware of the chumpness, sccoooore 1 for her. actually probaly score 5...

BTW, calling her will NOT make her care. not about you anyways. it will just stroke her ego.


2. if there is ANY IL at all, if it seems like you do not give a sh!t about it (and she will wonder whhyyyyyy?!?! does he think i am just a slvt? did he ever really like me) she will stress, you will give her something to think about, you'll come across as a better man (than she thought) and her IL will go up. have fun with it...if you care too. see, it will be all in your hands at that point. if she cares that is. if not see reason 1 above again.

 

[Lost Cause]

Man I hear what you guys are saying.... it is exactly what I was thinknig in class today. When she was calling me and coming over without notice I felt like I was in control. She broke up with me and now she realizes what she threw away. So I played it cool and didn't give in. Now that I've seen her with somebody else (I think there is a chance she saw me, and macked him to make me jealous... it seemed too fake to me) she is hoping that I call her, correct? She wants to know I still care and I still have feelings for her. Because if I didn't then why would I call? Why would I care? I didn't make a scene at the bar for that exact reason...I wanted to look like the better half walking in to see his slvt of an ex girlfriend macking some dooshbag (who looked like a total player) just to try to get underneath my skin.

When I saw her and confronted her about it w/o caring she went into the bathroom with her friend and never came out. If she had really moved on and was happy she wouldn't of cared if I saw her with some guy, correct? She is hurting and I smell blood. She wants the life back that we had (which was nothing like any other couple I've ever seen).... and she's trying to make me jealous so I come running back to her and give in and beg for her to come back. She broke up with me and she couldn't possibly crush her ego to come crawling back so she's trying to get me to come back to her.

Maybe I'm way off base here or just trying to stroke my ego a little bit here but it is a definate possibility. I do have feeling for her still.. I won't lie about that. We dated for a long time and we were each other's "soulmates." If she is in fact trying to get me back I'm gonna make her work for it.

I put a rubber band around my wrist. Everytime I want to pick up my cell phone and call her I snap it.

Wish me luck.

 

[Revlis]

As you sort of mentioned you do still have a lot of feelings for her simmering.

Dude even if you have it remembered, delete her phone number(s) now! I've been through this myself (like others) and it's all too tempting just to ring her and let rip or become AFCish.

What you saw has really got to you and you have to do your best and not read into it and not give a shyte. You'll never figure out what she is thinking, it's impossible and why do you care if she's trying to make you jealous or not? Just thinking about it means she's won!

Luck!

 

[Kodiac]

I like the rubber band thing lol

Ive renamed my old oneitis to AFC in my phone book. So im reminded of how she disrespected me etc.. and id be a chump to call her. It's quite funny when the phone rings and it says "AFC calling" -especially when my friends see it and r like, "who's AFC?", then i tell em to answer and just tell her that im "BUSY"

But im over her now...it took time even when i was seeing other ladies. And now ? Im single, no women, no potentials, no hassles. Im focusing on other area's of my life - mainly work, money then once i achieve those goals, a nice big vacation.

I still catch myself thinking about my past oneitis's, but thats only normal. I just remind myself they are in my PAST, not my future.

Keep flirting with other women, take up some new hobbies, meet new ppl.

Dont call her.

 

[Industry]

Here's my take on your situation and correct me if I am wrong.

She's still calling you and coming over without your permission, correct? Well man I think you should be able to answer this one on your own. She still has feelings for you and wants to see if you are moving on or if you still have the same thing going for her. She's keeping her foot in two different doors to see which one is the better place for her. As long as she can keep you a little bit interested, she has a chance. This is what she was looking for. She probably does miss your relationship. I'm guessing it was both of your first LTR's. You both have 2+ years of memories and life experiences and she just won't let that go away. Even if she does find someone else.

And the fact that she was kissing some guy on Friday isn't the issue. What did she do after you confronted her? She went into the bathroom didn't she? She was upset you didn't care about what she was doing. Regardless of if she saw you before she kissed him or was just doing it because, she wouldn't of acted that way if she really has moved on. She would of stuck by her new man and talked to you like nothing was wrong.

You don't want her back. Old flames never die twice. Just move on and find another girl. A stupid, hot, cokehead, hairdresser? I can't think of anything worse. So what if she is hot. You and I both live in Orange County and you know as well as I do that there are plenty of hot women around here. Just get your a$$ out there and get your groove on.

Good luck my friend.