Scarcity Mentality

RedPill

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Scarcity Mentality

Without going into some huge feature-length essay on the Law of Scarcity, I want to explain why I believe having a Scarcity Mentality is the root cause of so many common problems that people experience. This is including, but certainly not limited to interactions with women.

Anyone who has been on these boards for any substantial length of time is aware of the Spinning Plates concept. This concept is a winner, and it works because its user has harnessed the Power of the Least Interested (the party who is less interested, or needs the other party less in a relationship, has the power). I would venture to say that over 50% of the problems presented on this board could be solved if one would recognize that they have fallen victim to a mindset of scarcity, whereby a perceived lack of options has created a fear of loss.

EXAMPLE: John likes Jane. Jane is hot, and she’s fun. They’ve been dating for 6 months. Jane is starting to flake, for seemingly no reason. John comes on to sosuave.net and asks what the flaking means, and asks how he can raise her interest level in him back to where it used to be. Would John be asking this if he had other options of similar or better quality? What if he knew that all he has to do to acquire those options is go out and be sociable for a few weekends? Is it possible that his Scarcity Mentality is manifesting itself in his behavior around Jane, slowly lowering her interest in him?

In my business, when I’m having a slow sales week, I always stop to ask myself, is it because the market for my services has dried up or because I haven’t put enough effort into getting prospective clients in front of me? Ten times out of ten, it’s the latter.

Having a Scarcity Mentality causes people to have all sorts of irrational thoughts. Those thoughts guide irrational decisions, which in turn set off a whole chain of derivative fears and problems. People won’t leave careers they don’t like because they fear there is no other type of work they can do. They hang onto friends who have negative attitudes toward self-improvement because they think that there are too few candidates for friendship out there. Most notably around here, they won’t detach themselves from a woman because they fear it will take them years to find another one as good as or better than her.

The only way to gain the Power of the Least Interested is to actually be the least interested. In other words, one must lose their fear of loss. How does one achieve this? Eliminate the Scarcity Mentality.

Let’s say for a moment you are hungry, and you pour yourself a bowl of cereal. You go to the fridge to get some milk to pour on your cereal, and there’s just enough milk left. If you use it, you’ll be out of milk. Do you panic and put the cereal away, so that you don’t lose those precious last drops of milk? Of course not! It’s internalized in you that if you need more milk, all you have to do is go buy it. It’s everywhere. A ridiculous example perhaps, but it illustrates how one’s mind works when it’s not corrupted by the irrational fears caused by a Scarcity Mentality.

If you work to eliminate this mindset from your paradigm, you’ll find there is an unlimited abundance of opportunity out there for you. That, and when your chick causes a problem, you won’t lose any sleep over nexting her ass!
 

zigzag

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Good post. This is an important concept.

How exactly do you eliminate this mindset? How do you remove the fear of loss?

The "least interested" doesn't fear loss/failure/rejection/shame. So you need to be confident in yourself. How do you become confident at something you have always failed at?
 

Le Parisien

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Very good insight!!!:up:
Although for socially intelligent people, it's just common sense they already know. But put brilliantly into words, they can help guiding the AFCs.

zigzag said:
How exactly do you eliminate this mindset? How do you remove the fear of loss?

The "least interested" doesn't fear loss/failure/rejection/shame. So you need to be confident in yourself. How do you become confident at something you have always failed at?
RedPill pointed out what you should strive to achieve, he didn't say how.
Why? Well, I think the answer is quite straightforward: by NOT having to worry about scarcity because you have plenty.

It's not a mindset that you should try to eliminate, anyone with only one option would be victim of scarcity, it's natural. The solution is to always have many options.

More precisely, it's not about having only one HB prospect and trying to get rid of your "scarcity mindset", because even the best DJ or PUA in the world won't be able to; it's about always having many HBs as options so you will never worry about it.

Sure, I do agree that for the AFCs, it's stuck again, because it's exactly their lack of social skills with HBs that got them into the scarcity situation at the first place. This tip points out where they should be, but it doesn't say how to get there (which is normal since "how to get there" basically means "how do I get many HBs", a vast topic).
 

young_gun

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This is a very good post. It's not always easy, but it's important to remember that if a woman isn't living up to your expectations that she is easily replaceable. Good stuff.
 

disciple

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PHP:
Originally Posted by zigzag
How exactly do you eliminate this mindset? How do you remove the fear of loss?

In order to remove this fear you have to change your paradigm of the world.

You have to change how you see things.

Bruce Lee once said that if you focus on one leaf on a tree you won't be able to see the other 999 leaves on the tree.

There are 3 billion women on this planet at any given time and to think that messing up or striking out with one of them is the end of the world is crazy.

For one thing, any man that masters the skills of challenge, mystery, and all the other Don Juan mackin skills is automatically in the top 5% of all men.

If you search for the good information on this site the knowledge you attain gives you an advantage that most other men don't have regardless of looks, financial status, age, etc.

All you have to do is work on getting your mind right in terms of how you view the game, and that is exactly what this is, a game.

No matter how many times you may have froze up or f*cked up in the past, it doesn't matter.

Pick yourself up like a man does, learn from the experience, and use what you've learned to help you with the next woman and so on and so on.

There are no wins or losses only experiences and lessons to be learned.

If you stopped right now and looked at your own life and past experiences and analyzed them, I'm sure there are alot of lessons that life may have tried to teach you but you missed them.
 
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disciple said:
No matter how many times you may have froze up or f*cked up in the past, it doesn't matter.

Pick yourself up like a man does, learn from the experience, and use what you've learned to help you with the next woman and so on and so on.
This is good stuff!! Well said disciple.

I think the biggest thing guys forget, and maybe the biggest cliche of ALL time is: "There are more fish in the sea". And you know what? Everyone who says that is right. I've learnded that from experience. But what they don't tell you is that the next one will be better than the one who left because now you're on the look out for something better because of your experience.
 

RedPill

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zigzag said:
How exactly do you eliminate this mindset? How do you remove the fear of loss?

The "least interested" doesn't fear loss/failure/rejection/shame. So you need to be confident in yourself. How do you become confident at something you have always failed at?
Le Parisien said:
This tip points out where they should be, but it doesn't say how to get there (which is normal since "how to get there" basically means "how do I get many HBs", a vast topic).
The answer to "how":

Having options with several women may alleviate one's fear of loss in the short term, but it's guys who won't shake the mindset that "finding available HBs is difficult" who lose in the long run. BELIEVE that, although they are not the majority, HBs exist in abundance.

The guys on here who say crap like "all the good ones are taken" are the worst victims of the Scarcity Mentality. Hot chicks aren't a resource that runs out! Every day thousands of females are born, and thousands of them die. On any given day various women will turn 21, give birth, break up with their boyfriend, get married, or go party in hopes a man will seduce them. It's a never-ending cycle. Every day thousands of attractive women enter the market and thousands exit the market. This has been true forever.

When you can see that there is a never-ending supply of attractive women out there, you will lose the Scarcity Mentality as it relates to dating. How you rid yourself of it is to actively open your eyes and mind to see the abundance that exists in the world around you. That's all there is to it.

The point of this tip is larger than just dating. It's that people carry a Scarcity Mentality with them in many areas of their life, and it has a very negative ripple effect. If you see that the world full of abundance, you'll never fear loss. And when you lose your fears, you're invincible.
 

young_gun

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RedPill said:
The guys on here who say crap like "all the good ones are taken" are the worst victims of the Scarcity Mentality. Hot chicks aren't a resource that runs out! Every day thousands of females are born, and thousands of them die. On any given day various women will turn 21, give birth, break up with their boyfriend, get married, or go party in hopes a man will seduce them. It's a never-ending cycle. Every day thousands of attractive women enter the market and thousands exit the market. This has been true forever.

When you can see that there is a never-ending supply of attractive women out there, you will lose the Scarcity Mentality as it relates to dating. How you rid yourself of it is to actively open your eyes and mind to see the abundance that exists in the world around you. That's all there is to it.

The point of this tip is larger than just dating. It's that people carry a Scarcity Mentality with them in many areas of their life, and it has a very negative ripple effect. If you see that the world full of abundance, you'll never fear loss. And when you lose your fears, you're invincible.
Great point. One thing I've begun saying to myself is "If not me, then who?" It's crazy how much people's fears can inhibit them.
 

CJ 101

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There are so many women out here and they outnumber men. Let the guy's out here start approaching more and complaining less and you'll see the difference. Guy's there's alot of women out here waiting to be approached by a suave, confident alpha male so let's get out there and get these girls.
Bi
 

XY.

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There are a seemingly infinite number of pvssies out there to slay. Don't let one hold you back
 

London NATURAL

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RedPill said:
the Spinning Plates concept. This concept is a winner, and it works because its user has harnessed the Power of the Least Interested (the party who is less interested, or needs the other party less in a relationship, has the power). I would venture to say that over 50% of the problems presented on this board could be solved if one would recognize that they have fallen victim to a mindset of scarcity, whereby a perceived lack of options has created a fear of loss.
+1 It's a great aid until you've learnt to internalise it. Like stabilisers/training wheels on a kids bike.
 
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