You can tell when you have been struck by shyness and/or embarrasment because you get this horrible feeling, noone can explain this feeling yet everyone has felt it and knows what it is. Fear and Laziness are the 2 main factors that stop people from being who ever they want to be in my oppinion. I covered laziness in my last post but fear i havent yet discussed, well what im about to tell you is that shyness and embarrasment make up a HUGE amount of this fear i speak of, wether it be when your scared of approaching a HB, scared of saying a joke in a group of people, scared of letting out your oppinion, scared of speaking publically, scared of going to an interview, etc. The list goes on and on, you all know that these kind of events strike a particular nerve in your mind that make you feel terrible and leave you in a frightened daze after the event of embarrasment.
Before we start on things that help you combat shyness and embarrasment i am going to give you a personal story to make sure you understand it is possible. The personal story is of me, this isn't tooting my own horn, it is simply giving you the facts so you understand it is possible.
Before: The shyest person EVERYWHERE, i couldnt even talk to girls i had known for 3 years without sounding like a ****en nervous wreck, i had never approached a girl, i never talked to girls, i was shy even around my closest of friends because i was SO ****ing insecure with myself.
After: I can approach any girl/stranger i please without getting nervous, i am not afraid to do things publically, i am the main contributor in group convo's and always saying jokes and the rest. An example from last night: I was in a theatre with hundreds of people and it was packed, it was full of all the girls i will be at school with next year and the guy finished his presentation, he asked if anyone had any questions some people asked serious questions, and i put on a kids voice and asked if i could please go to the toilet. The whole theatre roared with laughter and i was approached by a whole bunch of girls that will be at my school next year, i would of never thought of doing something like this before.
To combat these feelings we first have to understand what makes us feel this way. Well simply put, shyness and embarrasment (nervousnes as well) comes from insecurity. The more insecure somebody is the harder it is to do something publically because an insecure person automatically feels like everyone is watching them and judging them, when in reality not everyone is watching them and NONE of them are judging them, they are simply observing what they are doing. Dont refer to it as battling shyness and/or embarrasment, think of it as becoming a secure and stable person.
Okay here are some solids you can eat down to make yourself more secure.
Physical appearance
A fairly obvious one but i thought it necessary to point it out none the less. When your physical appearance increase's so does you security. Simple.
Don't strive for recognition
BIG ONE! Dont strive for people's recocgnition, this comes in so many shapes and forms it is hard for me to explain this one so bear with me. An example is when my friend the other day who is one of the best soccer players i know scored 6 goals in the state indoor finals, he always says "nah im not that good" he does that delibrately just so people go "Yeah man your the best" to feed his insecurity and make himself feel better. It's like when muscly people say "nah im not that strong" just so people tell them that they are, its so sad and insecure. It happens with girls as well when people say "Nah i dont think she likes me" even though everyone knows she does, its so sad.
Keep it to yourself
This was in my last post as well i know, but it works with both laziness and shyness. The plan is to keep your personal life PERSONAL, even if you had a threesome with the hottest identical twins on the planet dont tell a soul. Dont deny it if someone asks, just dont bring it up. If your losing weight, dont say to someone "I've lost 5kg and gotten stronger!" thats sad and your just searching for their recognition. remember: KEEP IT TO YOURSELF! but dont deny it if someone asks.
Be daring!
This will make you alot more secure, especially if you do things that will make you laugh, i have been very daring the past week and its been a ball. I have said all sorts of things to girls, approached HB's my friends said i wouldnt, i saturated the entire canteen with the fire hose including a teacher, i edited a picture of a girl at our school and made her look all funny and stuck it up all over the school, i got into the girls change rooms through the roof, and there is more. I understand going this extreme isnt for everyone, but just dare to do things you normally wouldnt.
Good luck my friends...
Before we start on things that help you combat shyness and embarrasment i am going to give you a personal story to make sure you understand it is possible. The personal story is of me, this isn't tooting my own horn, it is simply giving you the facts so you understand it is possible.
Before: The shyest person EVERYWHERE, i couldnt even talk to girls i had known for 3 years without sounding like a ****en nervous wreck, i had never approached a girl, i never talked to girls, i was shy even around my closest of friends because i was SO ****ing insecure with myself.
After: I can approach any girl/stranger i please without getting nervous, i am not afraid to do things publically, i am the main contributor in group convo's and always saying jokes and the rest. An example from last night: I was in a theatre with hundreds of people and it was packed, it was full of all the girls i will be at school with next year and the guy finished his presentation, he asked if anyone had any questions some people asked serious questions, and i put on a kids voice and asked if i could please go to the toilet. The whole theatre roared with laughter and i was approached by a whole bunch of girls that will be at my school next year, i would of never thought of doing something like this before.
To combat these feelings we first have to understand what makes us feel this way. Well simply put, shyness and embarrasment (nervousnes as well) comes from insecurity. The more insecure somebody is the harder it is to do something publically because an insecure person automatically feels like everyone is watching them and judging them, when in reality not everyone is watching them and NONE of them are judging them, they are simply observing what they are doing. Dont refer to it as battling shyness and/or embarrasment, think of it as becoming a secure and stable person.
Okay here are some solids you can eat down to make yourself more secure.
Physical appearance
A fairly obvious one but i thought it necessary to point it out none the less. When your physical appearance increase's so does you security. Simple.
Don't strive for recognition
BIG ONE! Dont strive for people's recocgnition, this comes in so many shapes and forms it is hard for me to explain this one so bear with me. An example is when my friend the other day who is one of the best soccer players i know scored 6 goals in the state indoor finals, he always says "nah im not that good" he does that delibrately just so people go "Yeah man your the best" to feed his insecurity and make himself feel better. It's like when muscly people say "nah im not that strong" just so people tell them that they are, its so sad and insecure. It happens with girls as well when people say "Nah i dont think she likes me" even though everyone knows she does, its so sad.
Keep it to yourself
This was in my last post as well i know, but it works with both laziness and shyness. The plan is to keep your personal life PERSONAL, even if you had a threesome with the hottest identical twins on the planet dont tell a soul. Dont deny it if someone asks, just dont bring it up. If your losing weight, dont say to someone "I've lost 5kg and gotten stronger!" thats sad and your just searching for their recognition. remember: KEEP IT TO YOURSELF! but dont deny it if someone asks.
Be daring!
This will make you alot more secure, especially if you do things that will make you laugh, i have been very daring the past week and its been a ball. I have said all sorts of things to girls, approached HB's my friends said i wouldnt, i saturated the entire canteen with the fire hose including a teacher, i edited a picture of a girl at our school and made her look all funny and stuck it up all over the school, i got into the girls change rooms through the roof, and there is more. I understand going this extreme isnt for everyone, but just dare to do things you normally wouldnt.
Good luck my friends...
