Safe oral sex and STDs

OnTheWayUp

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Hi people,

As you might know, I lost my v-card last week to a ONS with an 8 in a club. :) We spent the whole night and most of the following morning in my bed, during which time we did all sorts of sexual things. It was great fun, and it's a massive weight off my back knowing in my own mind that I've lost the stigma of being a virgin.

That said, as a sexually active person, I now have new issues to contend with. With both the girl I lost my v-card to and one previous girl, we both did unprotected oral on each other. In the case of the ONS last week, this happened multiple times.

I want to use my example to raise the issue of protection during oral sex, as it's something that's rarely talked about on here. It strikes me that everyone agrees that a condom is a must with vaginal sex, but as soon as it comes to oral, people's thoughts diverge:

For protection:

-Better protection against STDs for both of you.
-Particularly important for ONS's, where it's hard, if not impossible, to vet the girl beforehand.
-Particularly important if you're sleeping with many different girls- which is the ideal lifestyle advocated on this site and the lifestyle I am striving towards.

Against protection:

-Better stimulation, so more fun.
-Latex tastes horrible. I have flavoured condoms in my room which I took out on Friday- the girl wanted to do it without.
-In a LTR, you can both make sure that the other person is tested, so the issue is less important. Obviously this makes the assumption that neither party is sleeping around.
-The risk of getting an STD via unprotected oral is far lower than via normal sex.

Many girls can only *** through oral, so this is not a trivial issue! What do you guys think?
 

Just a Shot Away

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OnTheWayUp said:
Many girls can only *** through oral, so this is not a trivial issue! What do you guys think?
That's just not true. As far as protecting during oral, while it's true that there's less chance of contracting STD's without protection...it's still a very real possibility. I'd definitely be scared of getting herpes more than anything. Incurable and can be easily transmitted, especially if she has an outbreak.

That being said, it can be real tough in the heat of the moment to force yourself to wrap it up if she's about to wrap her lips around your pud.
 

OnTheWayUp

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Just a Shot Away said:
That's just not true.
This may well be the case. The only reason I mentioned how may girls only *** from oral is because the two girls who I've done it with both mentioned that because they were so sensitive down below, they find it impossible (so far) to get off any other way. The one I lost my virginity to actually went as far as saying that she can't masturbate without panties on, lol! I swear I've also read this on the internet as well. Feel free to correct me, those with more experience.

Either way, this is still an important issue, as going down on girls is surely a staple of any player's repertoire, right?
 

OnTheWayUp

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Yep, I'm aware of this. Anyone want to offer a more detailed perspective? I'm particularly interested in hearing from some of the slightly older guys who have experience at sleeping with an array of different girls in multiple simultaneous relationships.
 

You essentially upped your VALUE in her eyes by showing her that, if she wants you, she has to at times do things that you like to do. You are SOMETHING after all. You are NOT FREE. If she wants to hang with you, it's going to cost her something — time, effort, money.

Quote taken from The SoSuave Guide to Women and Dating, which you can read for FREE.

Falcon25

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Let me get this straight "as a sexually active person" you want to give advice about std's and protection? You have had sex ONE time bro. You are not active. Second, get the fuvk out of here with this bull****. This is like a seventh grader giving advice on how to sell cars. What is this bullshivt? Can't stop laughing, "a sexually active person". haha

Start worrying about oral std's when you get routine blow jobs. Unbelievable, these guys....
 

OnTheWayUp

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Fully agree, hence why the purpose of the thread was not to provide advice, but rather to seek it/ facilitate discussion. This is an important issue- even if you're right in that having done oral with only two different girls my present chances of having anything are almost zero. I'm thinking ahead here.
 

PDubb75

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Falcon, I would agree with you, but while routine action gives you a better chance at contracting an STD or STI, you sure as hell can get something from 1 single time.

I was friends with a guy in high school that came into class one day bragging that he lost his virginity over the weekend to a girl he met buying shoes at the mall. He contracted herpes from her. Obviously quantity increases the chance, but the time to start getting information is when you start becoming sexually active, which is what OnTheWayUp is doing.

The second I saw this thread I knew it was gonna get responses like that. People don't care at all about using protection for oral sex. I work at an STD testing company, and I know that these occurrences are on the rise. It is an important issue.

With that being said, I personally don't use protection. But I also don't hook up with dirty vvhores. I know It's still a risk, but you can only do so much.
 

Iceberg

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PDubb75 said:
With that being said, I personally don't use protection. But I also don't hook up with dirty vvhores. I know It's still a risk, but you can only do so much.

Just out of curiosity, how do you know who's a dirty ***** and who isn't?

We all try to qualify girls as best we can, but when dealing with people, you can never TRULY know, right? Unless it's a girlfriend. But even when I had a steady gf, and she was on the pill, I'd still use protection. Because I like having some control over the issue and not just relying on someone else.

And also, why don't you use protection? I've been sexually active since I was 18. I'm 30 now. And aside from stupid mistakes, a good 90-90% of my sex has been protected. I guess the fact that I never weened myself off of condoms allows me to not feel the urge to have lots of unprotected sex. I don't know what I'm missing out on, so I don't worry about it.
 

OnTheWayUp

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Iceberg said:
And aside from stupid mistakes, a good 90-90% of my sex has been protected.
Interesting... just for the sake of clarity, do you include oral in this "90%" of sex? If so, what reactions do you get from girls?
 

At this point you probably have a woman (or multiple women) chasing you around, calling you all the time, wanting to be with you. So let's talk about how to KEEP a woman interested in you once you have her. This is BIG! There is nothing worse than getting dumped by a woman that you really, really like.

Quote taken from The SoSuave Guide to Women and Dating, which you can read for FREE.

loveshogun

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Sh*t man, I had my first pregnancy scare last summer, which was whack because I was using condoms with her 100% of the time, and had no breakages (check that **** after you pull out!).

In my head, I thinking "she's gotta be banging other people." I went "meh," and got back to worrying if there was a potential mini-me on the way.

She turned out not to be pregnant (combination of stress, weird diet and low body fat), but still.

Wrap your salami. You can get used to a condom. I mean, you can probably get used to herpes, or having to pay child support, too. But, I'd rather get used to a condom.
 

PDubb75

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Iceberg said:
Just out of curiosity, how do you know who's a dirty ***** and who isn't?
I don't know. I probably used poor word choice when I said that. But it helps that I don't go for ONS, or girls that are all over every guy, etc. Obviously that is still making assumptions, but "easier" girls I don't think anyone would argue are more prone to STDs and STIs.

Iceberg said:
And also, why don't you use protection? I've been sexually active since I was 18. I'm 30 now. And aside from stupid mistakes, a good 90-90% of my sex has been protected. I guess the fact that I never weened myself off of condoms allows me to not feel the urge to have lots of unprotected sex. I don't know what I'm missing out on, so I don't worry about it.
I completely left out important information here. I meant to say I don't use protection for ORAL sex. I used protection 99.999% of the time for vaginal sex. Even including my 6 year relationship, I have had unprotected vaginal sex just once in my lifetime.
 

Iceberg

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OnTheWayUp said:
Interesting... just for the sake of clarity, do you include oral in this "90%" of sex? If so, what reactions do you get from girls?
Sorry. Not oral.

I've never had protected oral sex. Scientifically, I'm sure you SHOULD. But it'd be such a weird thing to do.

The best I've done was tell girls that I'm not familiar with that I "don't like oral sex" or "i dont want to come too fast" when they try to go down on me.

If I'm in a completely unknown situation, I'd rather skip the oral sex than let some girl I just met do it to me.

I think my new line, now that I'm older, is going to be to tell girls the truth, which is that we probably shouldn't do anything unprotected until we get to know each other more. F**k it. I'm 30.
 

OnTheWayUp

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Any reason this has been moved Mods? Seems like a pretty central topic to seduction to me, especially considering the overall player lifestyle that's advocated on here....


There seems to be general consensus that:

-protection is a must for normal vaginal sex with ONS's.

-a basic attitude of caution when it comes to doing unprotected oral with a ONS is highly advisable. If she looks dirty or smells, abstain. I like the excuses for not doing oral that Iceberg provided in his last post.

-in a relationship, you can vet each other that much more thoroughly (including getting tested for STDs and showing each other the results), so the issue is of very little importance.


What's difficult is the degree of subjectivity surrounding doing unprotected oral with a ONS/ casual sex partner. Sure, there are some STDs that are obviously visible (a basic Google search proves this point with ease), but what about the ones that aren't? We can all vet girls we take home to a greater or lesser extent based on how slutty they seem, but it's impossible to come up with a conclusive answer to the issue of whether they are completely clean or not. The only foolproof solutions are to abstain from sex altogether (er... lol) or to only sleep with a girl once you're in a committed relationship (this raises the issue of how you get into the relationship in the first place...).


Any more perspectives on this issue? I'm shocked that it doesn't come up more on SS. Does anyone here use protection for oral on ONS's?
 

At this point you probably have a woman (or multiple women) chasing you around, calling you all the time, wanting to be with you. So let's talk about how to KEEP a woman interested in you once you have her. This is BIG! There is nothing worse than getting dumped by a woman that you really, really like.

Quote taken from The SoSuave Guide to Women and Dating, which you can read for FREE.

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