Requesting your help to analyze scenario

[Paarth Shah]

I apologize in advance for the length of this post, but I would very much appreciate any input. I've lost the girl, not a big deal, I have other plates. However, Im trying to learn from my mistakes and I've learned more from you all in the past several days than I have all year studying on my own. So here it is:

Tuesday: Match with girl on Tinder, exchange messages, upgrade to phone numbers/texting.

Wednesday: Continue texting, she suggests to meet up since we work around same location, we meet for coffee. I set up date #2 for Saturday for drinks.

Thursday / Friday: I know I messed up a bit here, but I became a needy lil ***** and decided to text her a bit both days. Not long texts, 3-4 exchanges each, she responded pretty quickly and gave no signs of losing interest. However, my last text on Friday was at 1 PM to which she never replied.

Saturday: Sent confirmation text, she cancelled due to being sick. Asked if we "could go another time?" but no specific dates/times for rescheduling. I said sure, hoped she feel better.

Sunday: No texts exchanged

Monday: I asked her how she was doing, she replied "Much better, sorry had to cancel, was in bed all Saturday. Hope you have a good week".

Tuesday: I sent her a good morning text and then after a few more exchanges I asked if she wanted to catch up on the phone that night (I was busy all this week and so I wouldnt be able to meet her). She replied with the rejection, stating I was a good person but timing was bad, blah blah.

Analysis: I know texting her on Thursday/Friday was a mistake but besides that, was there any other way I could have prevented the rejection the following week? Chase Amante said in his "When to toss ball in her court" post that we should all attempt to atleast make another attempt, hence why I didnt just leave it to her to reschedule. Was that a mistake? Was there any hidden language in her posts that indicated I should have just parted ways earlier?

Thanks in advance for your time and attention.

 

[RangerMIke]

Yea you were texting too much and made things too easy for her. Chances are she wasn't feeling it after your coffee meetup... and let me guess... you made the 2nd date right after coffee. You came off as too eager, nothing you could have done but your eagerness just made the rejection faster.

Of course she is going to say "yes", chicks don't like rejecting you to your face, because she doesn't know how you are going to respond. But if you had waited til later to try and make a date, you likely would have just not responded or made excuses.

Put his behind you and move onto the next one... you'll find one that likes you.

 

[Paarth Shah]

Yea you were texting too much and made things too easy for her. Chances are she wasn't feeling it after your coffee meetup... and let me guess... you made the 2nd date right after coffee. You came off as too eager, nothing you could have done but your eagerness just made the rejection faster.

Of course she is going to say "yes", chicks don't like rejecting you to your face, because she doesn't know how you are going to respond. But if you had waited til later to try and make a date, you likely would have just not responded or made excuses.

Put his behind you and move onto the next one... you'll find one that likes you.

So you guys don't make plans for a subsequent date at the end of a previous date? In the future, would it be better to wait a few days, text her again to set up a 2nd date?

 

[Igetit!]

So you guys don't make plans for a subsequent date at the end of a previous date?

Well what happened at the end of the 1st date?

Did you kiss and make out? Do you grab one of her boobs?

Was it clear to you that she had interest in you,and that interest being confirmed by you making a move and her receiving it?

I personally think it ok to express wanting to see her again,BUT NOT make specific plans right then and there.

Like if the date went well,you two talk a bit more afterwards,kiss and make out a little,then in the middle of the making out,you say something like,"We're definately gonna have to do this again". Something more like that instead of,"Do you want to go out again? How bout Friday.....you free?".

If you just let her know you had a good time and want to see her again,but NOT MAKE SPECIFIC PLANS,just leave it open,you'll be less likely to come off as needy. You two still have each other's contact info.....you can call or text and set up a second date complete with details anytime. Trying to do it while still on the 1st date kinda makes you seem over-eager,as RangerMike said.

 

[Spaz]

Always after 1st date let them initiate contact to gauge their interest level.

If they initiate contact, wait 2-3 days before asking her for another date and the time/place must be of your choosing - gauge interest level.

 

[Trump]

I apologize in advance for the length of this post, but I would very much appreciate any input. I've lost the girl, not a big deal, I have other plates. However, Im trying to learn from my mistakes and I've learned more from you all in the past several days than I have all year studying on my own. So here it is:

Tuesday: Match with girl on Tinder, exchange messages, upgrade to phone numbers/texting.

Wednesday: Continue texting, she suggests to meet up since we work around same location, we meet for coffee. I set up date #2 for Saturday for drinks.

Thursday / Friday: I know I messed up a bit here, but I became a needy lil ***** and decided to text her a bit both days. Not long texts, 3-4 exchanges each, she responded pretty quickly and gave no signs of losing interest. However, my last text on Friday was at 1 PM to which she never replied.

Disappear after you make the date. It’s like robbing a bank. Once you have the money, you don’t stand in front of the teller waving the bag around. You make your hit and you get out.

Saturday: Sent confirmation text, she cancelled due to being sick. Asked if we "could go another time?" but no specific dates/times for rescheduling. I said sure, hoped she feel better.

‘’Could we go another time?’’ This is a trick question and power play.

‘Sure’ = you have no other sexual options. You have to wait until when and if she is feeling better.
‘No’ = you are angry and sexuallly frustrated

Tough question to answer.

 

[Paarth Shah]

Disappear after you make the date. It’s like robbing a bank. Once you have the money, you don’t stand in front of the teller waving the bag around. You make your hit and you get out.



‘’Could we go another time?’’ This is a trick question and power play.

‘Sure’ = you have no other sexual options. You have to wait until when and if she is feeling better.
‘No’ = you are angry and sexuallly frustrated

Tough question to answer.

So are you suggesting that if she was genuinely sick, she would have asked to reschedule that same night or at least offered a reschedule on her own when she got better?

 

[marmel75]

Analyzing stuff like this is never worth it. Bottom line is you arent high enough on her list. Go find women for who you are high enough on the list.

Simple as that nothing else needs to be said.

 

[JohnChops]

1) after you set up the date, I would’ve stopped texting until the day of the date UNLESS she texted you first. Then just keep it quick.

2) never send good morning texts. I don’t even do that **** with my girlfriend now.

3) analyzing is good for future reference and learning just don’t dwell on it. You seem like you’ve moved on already which is tits brotha.

 

[RedScorpion]

Way too much texting and 'caring' shown to a girl you barely know. She's a girl you met once, and you're coming on like she's your girlfriend already. Even if she was hypothetically - probably I'd say that's where your fault lies.

Step back a bit, pace yourself some and it'll go smoother.