Remember guys, COLD APPROACHING is for practice - don't expect good results

[skip2mylou781]

All I am simply saying is that cold approaching is for fun and for practice to get confidence up, but if you think that your chances of getting chicks thru cold approaching are good, then you are WRONG. I have seen field reports on this site, the guys in basically all the reports barely ever get #s, very very rarely get DATES...and my guess is, less than 1% of the chicks they go up to they end up having sex with.


Hit up parties, this is where your chances are the BEST at gettin girls to f*ck......and yes, the reasons are alcohol related

 

[JC9]

All I am simply saying is that cold approaching is for fun and for practice to get confidence up.

I won't argue with the success or failure with cold approaches but I will argue that they are very important and probably the advanced stage of a DJ's game.

The reason is this; You will find the best girls on the street. So if you don't have the skills to close from a cold approach, you limit yourself only to girls at clubs, your social circle, or online.

I have no doubt that you will get more girls and sleep with more girls at parties, clubs, or bars but will you get the same quality?

 

[skip2mylou781]

ever been to a college party? not only are girls hot (just as they would be on the street), but they probably are also drunk AND are open to getting laid that night, AND when u go say HI to them, that is NOT a cold approach, since they expect to be talking to guys. You are much more likely to get with a girl in that case than you are from a cold apporach on the street or at the mall, whether you are advanced DJ or not..........girls in non-pickup environments are in the hooking up mood like girls at parties - I preach for PARTIES, not bars or clubs, as ***** shields are up in those venues. This collelge party thing by the way applies only to guys who are like 17 - 25.........so mature men, no need to reply to this post lol

 

[skip2mylou781]

On that note, high school parties may just be crazier, so this applies to all u guys who are 14 - 17 as well!

 

[JC9]

College parties have tons of hot women, and they are easy to have sex with. Then again, that is true of college in general.

But why preach that as some sort of end all be all? Learning how to **** college girls at frat parties doesn't really help your skills very much and will leave you way behind those who also practice cold approaches once you no longer have access to the college scene.

They are not mutually exclusive actions. College parties, at least the ones worth attending, don't happen everyday. You, however, are out and about everyday with a plethora of beautiful women you could approach and close, so why not?

I'll tell you this much, if you're only source of action is coming from college parties and that's as advanced as your DJ skills go, you're in for a world of second hand girls when you get older.

 

[SELF-MASTERY]

Player Supreme was right about letting the girl choose you. When you do that it is no longer a cold approach. I've been doing this for the last 5 months and I have a pretty decent completion rate.

You mentioned in your other thread about isolation being the key to fk closing and I totally agree, if I get girl back to the house or separated from her social control group (friends) I have a 70-85% fk close rate.

 

[Blackdragon5095]

But we should do cold apporaches because we never know. Some girls can be friendly and not be interested in you. Even if they smile at you. Also their no harm in doing cold apporaches. It helps you become stronger and talk to more strangers. Make more friends ( higher status ).

 

[Mission]

Actually, the reason why it is so easy to meet people especially girls at parties, is because the group endorphines that are released by a good party precipitate everyone being in a good mood. When people are walking down the street etc they could be thinking about a million different things, at a party you are socializing so it is acceptable. Cold approaching is fine, I cold approach all the time, why? Cause why not? It is fun, just think, if you approached 20 girls, chances are at least 1 will like you, and since you are approaching girls you find desirable, that sounds good for me.

The real problem is that alot of guys on this site expect these amazing results from cold approaches, remember that just because you learn all this **** you are not an instant DJ, it takes practice, a good friend of mine picks up girls at malls etc all the time, and he does it with ease. People are always interested in meeting new people. Do any of you actually listen to girls talking around you, "Oh I met the CUTEST guy at ____ the other day" Now do you honestly think they approached him? No, but he approached them and they are stoked about it.

--Mission

 

[Victory Unlimited]

Yo Troops,


I'm a little older than most of you here. But one thing that I have found is that when you are beyond college age, your groups of babe targets tend to scatter.

The babes are older, more jaded, and have been through a lot of different stuff and it effects the places they go, AND how they act when they get there (see parties, clubs, happy hours, etc.). The B!tch shields are up MOST of the time.

I've met babes through some sort of social affiliations and I've met them through cold approaches. And I can tell you that the last 3 babes I have F-Closed have ALL been from the result of cold approaches.

My success rate has been consistently higher through cold approaches than meeting babes in other ways. Babes are a little less guarded at places they consider Guys-on-the-prowl Free Zones.lol

Why? My best guess is that when babes already think they kind of know you, or generally think they kind of know the type of guys in certain venues, they jump to conclusions. These conclusions that they reach about us are usually at worst-negative, or at best, uninteresting.

However, when I meet a chick on the street, in the grocery store, at the DMV, etc, it somehow comes across to them as more special. Not to mention the whole, natural alpha-male vibe you give off when you show a babe you have the balls to stop her in her tracks.

I think all of this plays into their exciting, "meeting a mystery man" fantasies that they read about, or always see on TV.

Quite frankly, the babes I generally meet through some type of common affiliation like work, church, or hobbies, often take for granted that they already know me. Most of them communicate to me "He's nothing special" through their low ILs along with a slew of needless sh!t tests.

Cold approaches have been my lifeline. They work well for me.




Peace...one day.

 

[DonJuanForever]

It doesn't really matter.
One sales guy does well on the phone
One sales guy does well using emails.
One sales guy does well referrals.

It does not matter. Cold approaches are not "cold" once she believes and sees you as attractive.

 

[Victory Unlimited]

Yo DonJuanForever,


I feel ya' bro.

Your post reminded me of yet ANOTHER truth.

A cold approach is almost the equivalent of approaching a complete stranger--- because there is no obvious mutual point of social reference for the two of you.

That's where the initial disinterest gets most of it's C0ckblocking power from. But we DJs have the skills to circumvent this. Why? Because we BELEIVE we can. We KNOW we can.

We know something that other people don't know. We know that it is a time to STOP following our mothers' advice that she gave us when we were children.

In order to protect us and to look out for our best interest, she told us, "Don't talk to strangers!"

But now that we are adults, we realize that that rule no longer applies to us. Now we know that in order to look out for our wn best interest that we must indeed now ALWAYS "Talk to strangers!"

Why?

Because, as adults, we know that if we continued to follow our mothers' advice...we'd never meet ANYONE!" LOL


A friend is just a former stranger that you decided was worth getting to know.



Peace...one day.

 

[tihash]

DIsagree with premise of original post.

I have met plenty of girls from daytime cold approaches (not club/bar/party settings). The shields are down, it is perceived as ballsy, and it works especially well in the 25-30 age group.

 

[Jariel]

People here seem to hate me saying this sort of thing, maybe because they don't like me shattering their illusion, but I agree with this post entirely.

There are uses for cold approaching, such as building confidence and developing a hardness to rejection, but I've never experienced or even seen any success (beyond a number) from them. It's just too unrealistic to expect girls to take a risk with a total stranger...unless they're drunk.

 

[JC9]

People here seem to hate me saying this sort of thing, maybe because they don't like me shattering their illusion, but I agree with this post entirely.

There are uses for cold approaching, such as building confidence and developing a hardness to rejection, but I've never experienced or even seen any success (beyond a number) from them. It's just too unrealistic to expect girls to take a risk with a total stranger...unless they're drunk.

I don't do many cold approaches right now, but even with a limited amount of them I have dated two girls that I met through a cold approach on the street since I started even trying cold approaches a few months ago.

But based on the quality of the girls I've met via a cold approach I plan to spend more time doing it.

It really isn't much of a risk for the girl. You open, build interest, build rapport like you would in a bar. Then you get her number and call her later for a date. And since there was no alchohol involved in the pickup, her state is less likely to be that different when you call her.

I pretty much just assume rapport as well. Someone, i forget their name, talked about acting like you were talking to your best friend that you haven't seen in years. I pretty much just assume rapport, and have a very light, relaxed demeanor.

Since adopting that frame more, I get girls telling me all the time "I can't believe we clicked so well".

My game is pretty poor as far as pickup goes, I don't do any routines or anything, but I didn't find cold approaches that much different from a bar pickup and the girls from the cold approaches were much more fun to date.

 

[Jariel]

I pretty much just assume rapport as well. Someone, i forget their name, talked about acting like you were talking to your best friend that you haven't seen in years. I pretty much just assume rapport, and have a very light, relaxed demeanor.

Since adopting that frame more, I get girls telling me all the time "I can't believe we clicked so well".

Yes, I do this too and I also get the same "I can't believe we clicked..." line so often too. It's a very good state of mind to take!

This always works when I meet someone in my uni classes, at work or via friends, but I am curious how you get to do this with girls you approach, as most the time they're on their way somewhere and have no time to chat or they're instantly suspicious. Most my cold approaches ended with girls thinking I was trying to sell something.

 

[milrenkb]

Yo DonJuanForever,


I feel ya' bro.

Your post reminded me of yet ANOTHER truth.

A cold approach is almost the equivalent of approaching a complete stranger--- because there is no obvious mutual point of social reference for the two of you.

That's where the initial disinterest gets most of it's C0ckblocking power from. But we DJs have the skills to circumvent this. Why? Because we BELEIVE we can. We KNOW we can.

We know something that other people don't know. We know that it is a time to STOP following our mothers' advice that she gave us when we were children.

In order to protect us and to look out for our best interest, she told us, "Don't talk to strangers!"

But now that we are adults, we realize that that rule no longer applies to us. Now we know that in order to look out for our wn best interest that we must indeed now ALWAYS "Talk to strangers!"

Why?

Because, as adults, we know that if we continued to follow our mothers' advice...we'd never meet ANYONE!" LOL


A friend is just a former stranger that you decided was worth getting to know.



Peace...one day.

Everyone here thats serious about getting everything together should have a mission statement that reads similar to the example above. Nice work.

 

[skip2mylou781]

TIHASH - its great that uve "met" plenty of women from cold approaching, and prob had good convo and got #s....but how many of them have u f*cked the same day u met them?? or how many have u f#cked at all from cold approaching? What is your sex/approach ratio?

 

[JC9]

Yes, I do this too and I also get the same "I can't believe we clicked..." line so often too. It's a very good state of mind to take!

This always works when I meet someone in my uni classes, at work or via friends, but I am curious how you get to do this with girls you approach, as most the time they're on their way somewhere and have no time to chat or they're instantly suspicious. Most my cold approaches ended with girls thinking I was trying to sell something.

I ussually just open with "Hey, how's it going" and then just talk about situational things. The girl I picked up in the bookstore was looking at Atlases, so I walked up said hello, then asked her if she was planning a trip.

That sparked a conversation that revolved around where she was going, had already visited, and wanted to go.

I added in some places I had been, talked about how cool it is to see new places, meet new people, and have new experiences. Then said I had to go, but she seemed like a cool girl. Got her number, then called her up later in the week to get together for coffee.

I also think a bit part of what works for me in these scenarios is having a small awareness radius. There is a post about it on here, and the original concepts are over on mASF.

The AR thing doesn't break down their guard at all, but it prevents the whole 'trying to sell me something' vibe. Watch good salesman at clothing stores, or even car dealerships; they are masters or keeping their attention off their target until the right moment.

Now some stats for the OP, since he is curious

Roughly 15 cold approaches, 2 numbers. Both girls I slept with on a later date, no same day f close. Not a great percentage, and no same day lay like you get in bars, but I enjoyed those much more than any girl I picked up in a bar.

I think if I was better at it, I am sure I could insta-date and same day f close. Once you get them to spend dedicated time with you, it should follow the same pattern as going out with them a few days later.

 

[crumpiteer]

cold approach is a good practice not for its results, but for your own growth..in the sales industry, newbies are also encouraged to make cold calls for many good reasons to help them grow professionally

 

[everywomanshero]

IU get lays off cold approaches. It is a skill. You have to have this skill and it takes time to develop. Being average will NOT get you laid off a cold approach. You have to push and take risks and be in state. Aside from that, don't ask for the number until you've been able to make out with her or been in the set for at least 25 minutes *general rule*

Until you get day 2s then you're sarging isn't good yet. That's all that means is you haven't done enough yet.

Listen, women are highly selective. If you think you're going to lift soem weights and listen to Tony Robbins and the women will come running then you are probably going to find out that doesn't work so well. If you're sick of the BS and ready to do somehting about it, then you might wanna consider learning solid game. Trust me, all the stuff that Mystery says is really true. I have personally been doing this and no lie it is all really true. The people who don't belive it works just haven't been able to get it to work. Trust me, it is really true.