Relationships are not all that great

[organizedconfusion]

Yes, please do this. That way SHE will end it and YOU will be better off rather than wasting anymore of your time. You think I'm being sarcastic, but I'm being dead serious. Follow this guy's advice so that you can get this relationship over with before you waste anymore of your life on this girl.

it's far better advice than the crap spewed all over the place in the community..****y funny,pretending to be alpha,telling stupid stories,trying to be the center of attention..even if you HATE it there
Creating tension and conflict is a helluva lot better then being her biotch.

 

[Vypros]

it's far better advice than the crap spewed all over the place in the community..****y funny,pretending to be alpha,telling stupid stories,trying to be the center of attention..even if you HATE it there
Creating tension and conflict is a helluva lot better then being her biotch.

Why would you stay with a girl in which you have to constantly create tension with in order to "spice things up"?

That's my only beef with it. Yeah, I agree it's better advice than most, but at the end of the day it just shows how uncompatable you are with someone if you have to do something like this to make the relationship interesting.

I bet she'd be a HELL of a lot more attracted to this guy if he just up and bailed on her.

 

[organizedconfusion]

Why would you stay with a girl in which you have to constantly create tension with in order to "spice things up"?

That's my only beef with it. Yeah, I agree it's better advice than most, but at the end of the day it just shows how uncompatable you are with someone if you have to do something like this to make the relationship interesting.

I bet she'd be a HELL of a lot more attracted to this guy if he just up and bailed on her.

yes,he ups and bails and that would create a desire for him back.But then that's it..there's no tension created.She just wants him back,once she gets him back they'll be in the same situation as before.Boring,same old routines.
that release of tension is only created once he does return,it's too one way or the other and no in between ground.slightly obtainable but not quite there sort of thing is where it should be.If he does break it off,theres no gaurentee that there will be a reunion.The tension falls flat,because there's too much risk involved and he looses too much control.It's better to dangle a ball and string in front of her,making her want it more then right when she gets it pull back some,Not just grab the ball away from the poor kitten and chuck it into the next neighborhood..what fun would that be??

Don't be an azzhole overnight,but put your foot down sometimes bud..you sound more like a shoffer then a BF :nono:


and it's not a constant tension sort of thing,it's all a balancing act..you just took it a little too literly,or maybe it's because how i explained it before hand..

 

[Vypros]

yes,he ups and bails and that would create a desire for him back.But then that's it..there's no tension created.She just wants him back,once she gets him back they'll be in the same situation as before.Boring,same old routines.
that release of tension is only created once he does return,it's too one way or the other and no in between ground.slightly obtainable but not quite there sort of thing is where it should be.If he does break it off,theres no gaurentee that there will be a reunion.The tension falls flat,because there's too much risk involved and he looses too much control.It's better to dangle a ball and string in front of her,making her want it more then right when she gets it pull back some,Not just grab the ball away from the poor kitten and chuck it into the next neighborhood..what fun would that be??

Don't be an azzhole overnight,but put your foot down sometimes bud..you sound more like a shoffer then a BF :nono:


and it's not a constant tension sort of thing,it's all a balancing act..you just took it a little too literly,or maybe it's because how i explained it before hand..

No, I understand exactly what you meant. I just disagreed wholeheartedly with it.

The idea is, that he's not breaking up with her to create attraction. I said that because it's truth. When she tries to get him back, he doesn't go running back to her. He puts his foot down and boots her out of his life and finds someone who is more compatible with him instead of WASTING HIS LIFE with this girl.

That's what I'm saying. I don't mean it as part of a game. I truly think that he just needs to end this now instead of dragging it out and it eventually ending anyway (probably with a "divorce" and a couple of kids in the mix).

So many people cling to a hopeless relationship and dig their claws in and watch it drag them into the depths until it ends visciously with pain between them both.

Cut that BS out and end it NOW so that you don't have to put yourself through it.

 

[organizedconfusion]

No, I understand exactly what you meant. I just disagreed wholeheartedly with it.

The idea is, that he's not breaking up with her to create attraction. I said that because it's truth. When she tries to get him back, he doesn't go running back to her. He puts his foot down and boots her out of his life and finds someone who is more compatible with him instead of WASTING HIS LIFE with this girl.

That's what I'm saying. I don't mean it as part of a game. I truly think that he just needs to end this now instead of dragging it out and it eventually ending anyway (probably with a "divorce" and a couple of kids in the mix).

So many people cling to a hopeless relationship and dig their claws in and watch it drag them into the depths until it ends visciously with pain between them both.

Cut that BS out and end it NOW so that you don't have to put yourself through it.

theres got to be some kind of chemistry for them to get together in the first place though,and it's not dragging it out..it's making it more interesting. Sure they can do the things they do now,but that's just the thing..he or maybe them both find it boring.Heck call me boring but i a movies and popcorn kind of guy..everynight and i would'nt mind,if it was keeping down the fort then theres no problem with it.He obviously has a problem and it's going nowhere in terms of the excitment department,there are many ways to liven things up and keep it interesting.

He can break it off with her,but then that would be it and it's over,no options left.. sure he can opt for that option but then what happens when this scanario happens again? the only default would be to end it and just continually end things when things go sour or flat.This way or anyother way of creating some tension/excitment whatever is that either way you learn something and get something out of the EXPERIANCE that you been through with those paticular actions,may be good may be bad but it's still experiance and it's more then what he left with,maybe even a valuable lesson out of it.
It may be risky but if it's fun than it dosen't matter :wave:

plus,I have a feeling he still likes her nothing wrong with that at all..

 

[organizedconfusion]

also clinging is different from keeping things exciting,one stems from insecurities and one stems from anticipation of keeping the waters warm and bubbly ..that tension created is that titilating emtion that keeps things exciting. It's a balancing act though..god knows it can't always be exciting or whatever..it would be exuasting trying to maintain it.

 

[DJinTraining06]

I didn't say anything about maturity. Funny that you brought it up though, how come?

i read two posts and mixed them up. Thats still ridculous though. How else would you learn without experience? Basically your saying only a manipulative guy can be in one?

 

[Last Man Standing]

There is no such thing as a "relationship" with a hor!!!

 

[Francisco d'Anconia]

i read two posts and mixed them up. Thats still ridculous though. How else would you learn without experience? Basically your saying only a manipulative guy can be in one?

All the experience in the world won't help you if you don't have a realistic personal definition of what a relationship means to you. Look around the forum and look at how many grown men here still are stuck in sustaining relationships. Years ago a LTR was counted in years, not months. We're grasping at straws in hope that we get lucky and things just "work out" with a woman.

Feeling that you need to be manipulative in order to be in a healthy relationship justifies this. It's as if a guy has realizes the chance of getting lucky enough to fall into the lap of a good relationship is slim to none so he believes he needs to manipulate his way into one. This is a recipe for failure. It's as if you're building a relationship on a foundation of soggy cardboard.

 

[organizedconfusion]

well of course definitions of relationships willl change with different age groups mid-late teens early-mid 20s mid-20s-early 30s and so forth. you can't expect the same standards for all the age groups.I'd imagine somebody in the older range may want something more meaniningfull and genuine or whatever,well of course.You're older wiser and more established in the world,you paid your dues and now you expect more then hot boobies and a fake tan,guys that droool over a hot chick will be do nothing more then a flick on your radar when you are older. You only have your views because you have already been through alot maybe maybe not but it's still going to alot more then say someone that's 18 or even 25-27..that's 10-15 years you got on most people here. You gotta live and learn i say, and it may not be the best way to tweak the strings like a puppet with a girl but when you're young..who cares? make mistakes ,have fun,unless you really really really want to marry the chick and decide to play it safe and walk on egg shells for her ( which i'd rather not) so not to mess things up..

 

[Francisco d'Anconia]

well of course definitions of relationships willl change with different age groups mid-late teens early-mid 20s mid-20s-early 30s and so forth. ...

It's not necessarily the same for specific age groups either. That's why I said "your personal definition of a relationship."

 

[BlackJackal]

Why would you stay with a girl in which you have to constantly create tension with in order to "spice things up"?

That's my only beef with it. Yeah, I agree it's better advice than most, but at the end of the day it just shows how uncompatable you are with someone if you have to do something like this to make the relationship interesting.

I bet she'd be a HELL of a lot more attracted to this guy if he just up and bailed on her.

Thats what I'm sayin. Though I dont care much for LTR, I would not want to keep drama and all that. I dont have the patience. If she wants excitement just had a bucket of water balloons and set the carpet on fire.

 

[ryannath]

Speaking of manipulating a LTR to make it more interesting. A little story I am about to tell. I have a friend and him and his gf were engaged and lived together. She would get drunk and start slurring her words, and he would say to her, "Get that diick out of your mouth" and laugh at her. One time after he said that, she told me that she "really hates him." I thought to myself, if this guy has to stoop to this level of manipulating this relationship by making fun of her, then it will never last. Guess what? Not too much after that, the engagement was off and she moved out and they broke up.

 

[organizedconfusion]

manipulating ? have you all forgot where you are all at? it's a seduction site for godsake!
It's all about manipulation one way or another :wave:

 

[Raikojo17]

if there really is love there like you claim, then u cant do anything wrong, or make her bored or watever. this is not love, jus intense infatuation that u have for this chick.

she might like you, but not as much as u like her. which shows in the fact that she leads the relationship and u go along with it.

take control, dont be her lap dog or her shadow. if ur getting bored than tell her. got a problem? tell her. most relationships fail only because of the simple fact that there is no communication.