Reject their B/S counteroffers

[Clutch]

Hey guys, I am still plugging along with this confidence thing, and got the nerve to ask out this fine ass girl today. I started a conversation with her, it was going well. She even asked me questions back about myself. Good sign. So then I cut to the chase and said "Maybe you'd like to get together sometime. Can I call you?" I know, I shouldn't have said "can I call you?" And right after I said it I thought "damn!" Then she looked down and away and was like "uhhhhh" and the old me would have been all bummed out waiting to get rejected, but the new me was staring her down, waiting for the ***** to say it, because I wanted to hear her lame excuse. She said "uhhh...why don't you give me your number?" Here's the kicker, because I have seen many a guy approach this girl and chat with her, and I'm pretty sure that most of them are too wimpy to ask her out, and those that do ask her out, and get this line from her, would be like "sure here's my number, call me if you want to go out sometime" and try to play it off like they succeeded with something. Poor bastards.

I, on the other hand, said "Nah, that's all right, don't worry about it," and kind of gave a sneer at the pen and paper that she was reaching for. Suddenly this girl's eyes got big and she said "you SURE?" And I was like "uh huh, nice meeting you though." I'm sure this girl is going to be wondering about me now, because all these other dudes drool all over her. Now that I now she's not interested, I don't even care about her any more though, so it'll be interesting to see the reaction I get from her when I see her next time.

 

[TurboLover]

Thats the way to do it. Because if you did give your number to her. You might wait for her call. And that would be BSing yourself.

 

[Freestyler]

*Yeah Clutch!*
You just did the right thing! Now she will wonder what the hell is wrong with that guy! But you really placed her where she belongs!
By giving her your number she would have the control but us we all know that's a job for US DONS! So not giving her your number equals to not giving her control!

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The Freestyler who always WINS!

 

[Interested2]

Clutch

you did the right thing. I had a similar experience where I asked for an email address....she said "no---you give me yours" and I did. It's a sign of low interest.

 

[Don the Legend]

Clutch,

Way to go man. Nice guys would have rushed to give her their number. She will definitely see you in a different light now.

Good Luck,

Legend

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"Do not fear failure." George S. Patton

"Do not make excuses, whether it s your fault or not."....George S. Patton

"Anyone in any walk of life who is content with mediocrity is untrue to himself and the American way." ... George S. Patton

 

[Sociopath31]

Sounds like she wasn't that interested, but then by the end of the chat, her interest was raised dramatically. Do not start convos with her. But wait. I'll wager it takes her 2 weeks to come up and start talking to you.

 

[Gipper]

Well done, Clutch!

Yeah, it's usually not a good sign when they want your number instead of giving their own. Stand your ground!

 

[BigBill]

You did good.

But I think you could have done better. You had a chance to erase the mistake you had made asking earlier by TELLING her to give you hers.

Her: 'ummmmm can I have yours'
You: '(big mischevious smile)
'I asked you first hon.'
or
'I have to go. Hurry and write it down. We can play games later.'
or
'Hmmm... you want my number I want your number, I guess we'll just have to trade!'
or
whatever the hell else.

I'm sure you can think of as good or better **** as I can. good not letting her dictate terms to you, but bad not following up with another close. Hell, after yuo refused her number, you may have gained respect in her eyes.

 

[lc]

hey

i had this experience. I asked a girl for her phone & she said she'd take mine.

I told her she couldn't have mine unless she gave me hers. She did. We're dating now.

Bottom line: Clutch, you did a good thing. Maybe she wouldn't've given you her phone anyway..i don't know....

but you were NOT an AFC & showed her you had the stones.

What a champ! Pat yourself on your back & scratch your balls, because it's obvious you still got 'em.

out

lc

 

[Gipper]

Originally posted by BigBill:
You did good.

But I think you could have done better. You had a chance to erase the mistake you had made asking earlier by TELLING her to give you hers.

Her: 'ummmmm can I have yours'
You: '(big mischevious smile)
'I asked you first hon.'
or
'I have to go. Hurry and write it down. We can play games later.'
or
'Hmmm... you want my number I want your number, I guess we'll just have to trade!'
or
whatever the hell else.

I'm sure you can think of as good or better **** as I can. good not letting her dictate terms to you, but bad not following up with another close. Hell, after yuo refused her number, you may have gained respect in her eyes.

Hmmm. I like the "I have to go... we can play games later" one. I would only try this once, though. If she still balks, walk away.

 

[wjboogy]

whats an AFC. Give me other abreviations used on this site.

 

[BigBill]

AFC = average frustrated chump.

A guy who is clueless about women and never gets any.

 

[Clutch]

**UPDATE**

I tried it again with another girl today. I'm telling you shy guys, get out there and do it, it's better to try and to not succeed with the number and to be content with getting in some practice, than to sit home this weekend, and be really mad at yourself because you didn't talk to a girl, or worse, talked to a girl, but didn't close for the number. I was reading Doc Love's new article about asking girls out in front of an audience, and found myself in such a situation today.

I was in this optical center with my mom, getting my eyes checked and getting a new supply of contact lenses, and the assitant that was checking my eyes was cute. Even though I had my contacts out, sometimes....you just get a sense that a girl is fine. Plus, I was kind of squinting and stuff to verify her fineness, so it was okay to stare at her in a situation like this when I had my contacts out. I started asking her how she liked her job, if it was repetitive, etc. She asked me what I did. Good sign. Then she checked my eyes some more and was like "I'll be right back." and touched my arm as she left. So now my blind ass is thinking, "Okay, it's on."
A little while later when we were paying for the lenses and everything, I wanted to ask her out. But my mom was standing there next to me, and I don't think anybody likes to talk to a girl or even think about romance when your mother is standing there. Plus there were several other people within earshot. Then my mom says "I'm going to go check out these frames over here." Ha, perfect opportunity! Even though other people were close to us, I decided what the hell. Not as if someone was going to put up a plaque on the wall that said "On this spot on October 12, 2001, this guy tried to ask out one of our assistants and was rejected." Nobody cares! So then I leaned over the counter while she was doing the receipt and said "I didn't notice how cute you were until I got my contacts back in. You seem like a really nice girl, we should get together and go out sometime." And she got this really flattered look, and smiled a lot, and acted like she wanted to, because she paused for a second, but then she said "I don't think my boyfriend would like that." She didn't say it like an excuse, because girls have said that line to me before, and I know what the "I have a b/f" excuse sounds like, but she said it differently, she said it like she subliminally meant "I WOULD, but..." So anyway, I didn't get the number, but I could tell she was flattered and I made her day, and she was attracted to me, because she was smiling a lot and made sure to say bye to us and thanked us a couple of times from across the room as my mom and I left. One thing that I think is funny is that after she said "My boyfriend..." She said "But come back and see us sometime when you need more lenses or need anything with your new contacts." So I was thinking that might have meant "Come back in a few weeks, because I don't like my current boyfriend." Not that I am hung up on this girl; I wouldn't go back there for a second attempt, I don't care any more, I'm pleased that I tried. I am posting this because last week, I balked at talking to a couple of girls, and last weekend I was all pissed and bummed out. But this weekend, even though Thursday and Friday I got rejected, I feel way better than I did this time last weekend.

 

[TheDude]

Damn right Clutch! See, thats what I shoulda done a week ago when I was going through that What the Hell post. I'm learning from your successes dude.

BTW, thanks to all for your replies to that post.

The Dude

 

[overlord]

"I didn't notice how cute you were until I got my contacts back in. You seem like a really nice girl, we should get together and go out sometime."

Great line! Way to go!

 

[dutchie]

Good job. I did the same with a pamela-lee lookalike at a local pub. She was giving me the eye all night...which made me feel good..guys were tripping over themselves to get a look at her. Anyhow, she pulled the girl me your number thing, and I said really??...right then I knew she wasn't legit, and was just looking for attention. The kind of girl that spends the whole night looking around the room to see how many guys are paying attention to her. They are out there.

 

[CableLight]

I hate those types...I mean, Im 17 so I havent been to a bar yet..really

Err anyway, there are a few High School age. Those chicks that just wait to play someone, you just wanna smack em At least it's somewhat safe to say that outside of Junior High there arent a whole lot of em, thankfully.

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CableLight
- Hey, I dunno what my name means either

"Always remember those you love. Even in death, no one is ever truely gone as long as they are remembered."

 

[AbsoluteFreakinChump]

Originally posted by wjboogy:
whats an AFC. Give me other abreviations used on this site.

ME!

 

[MsThang]

Originally posted by BigBill:
AFC = average frustrated chump.

A guy who is clueless about women and never gets any.

A guy who is clueless about women? Imagine that...

 

[Pook]

Clutch, your posts are the ones I love to read: guys realizing the power they always had.

Rejection is better then regret. For isn't it amazing how silly we were to walk through life on eggshells?

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Pook
"As you think, you shall become."
"The biggest risk you can take is not to risk at all."