Recovering from Acting Available/Beta

[EbbsAndFlows]

Yo guys. Lookin' for advice. Long-story short: I went b1tchmade & complacent with a girl I've been seeing for 4 months and she pulled away. Looking for tips on how to act. Now get ready for the book:

Met this chick about 4 months ago, went home with her first night, got her number, and played 9/10 early game. I let her initiate texts, I made her see me flirt with other girls after I casually invited her to a party, etc. She was feelin' me and it turned into multiple dates where I took her places she'd never been, made her laugh, blah blah blah blah = 9/10 early game. Super high interest levels.

Month or so in we're staying with eachother on the regular. She's seeing my phone light up from other girls. I'm still runnin' solid early game, being indifferent but interested (if that makes sense). 9/10 game still on

Two months in we get in a fight over some bull****. I'd been gettin complacent, revealing my mystery, being too available = *****made. After the fight she says she's confused because we aren't official and I'm acting distant. I turn B1TCHmade and try to apologize and all that. She pulls back heavy and I say **** it and move on. Before you know it, she's gettin' back at me. I turn my game all the way back on and got her back. I'm back to my early game.

For the next month or so, it's heavier than ever. Start sleepin together a lot. We're meeting eachothers family, she's telling her dad all about me. Feels like **** is getting serious. But then, AGAIN, I get complacent: Taking her places she's been (boring), staying together for NO reason (available as ****), and even tell one of her friends I really like her in a drunken stupor (b1t<hMADE, OMFG). She's all cute with me but but isn't making herself available. I initiate a few convos and try to get her out but she's still but makes herself unavailable (b1tchmade by me, again). This time I don't get needy though. I sense her getting cold EARLY this time and back off right away.

Last time I got her back by going extra cold, focusing on myself, getting phone numbers, and all but forgetting her. Last time she came back to me (saying she'd like to see me if I have time for her) in a pitiful way and I acted indifferent, told her I'd get back at her (which I did a bit later, until we went wildfire mode as I described.

What do I do? We are like 1 step away from exclusive bf/gf status, so it's a time where it would make sense to pull back for either of us. I sense she's stressed and questioning ****. Been like 5 days and she's sent me lame snap chats and initiated one boring ****-tier convo that I ended in a bit of a power play. Basically been like a week and a half since we had lunch and made out, week since a phone call (made by her, calling me good-lookin and ****), and a couple days since some weak text ****.

Do I keep the cold going till she comes back? Is there any chance of resetting this. When she comes back, I gotta go straight mystery alpha mode like last time right? If she comes back, do I initiate talks about a legit relationship and if so, when???? I keep pickin up my phone and putting it own cause I don't want her to know I'm thinking about her. Everyday that passes I focus more on work, the gym, and hobbies. I did a lot better the 2nd time around by my mid-game needs work. I'll kill it if she comes back this time.

I'm goin out this weekend to get phone numbers and find new *****es if she doesn't initiate contact.

IF YOU READ THIS BOOK, YOU DESERVE A GOLD STAR AND A COUPLE ENGLISH CREDITS TOWARDS A DEGREE OF YOUR CHOICE

Other considerations:
We're not even quite looks matched. I got an edge. She calls me good-lookin, handsome etc. But she is cute and has a good personality. She's def not the type to be a player. If there happens to be another dude in the picture, I'd gurantee she's testing me before she tries anything.
She super ambitious, works out 1-2 times a day (like 5 am type ****), and puts in 12 hour days. Needless to say, she gets really stressed out and reclusive.
We have a weird amount of **** incommon. LIke once-in-a-lifetime type ****. It gives me an edge but I'm not relying on that by any means.

 

[EbbsAndFlows]

Ok, here is the tl;dr. I just realized how ridiculous that book is:

Seeing a girl 4 months and she suddenly gets cold the day after calling me and being lovey dovey. We've boned plenty and all that and we even met some of each others family = high interest. She did this once before and when I went no contact she came back in a week. DO I DO THIS AGAIN? SHOULD I SAY **** IT?

 

[Dgwizdal]

What is your objective here? If you constantly have to keep putting an act on to keep her interested, then you're going to revert to your old ways time and time again. Youre a little all over the place, unbalanced, abit oneitised, and need to knock this pvssy off a pedestal. You go from indifferent ******* to beta white knight in the blink of an eye - neither is truely who you are. Innergame improvement and balance in your game is needed - stop focusing on her so much, realize you're the prize, always keep your frame and if she walks let her go. If she compromises your integrity, next.

She should be asking herself these questions about you - you have essentially already lost however...

For a quick fix and to directly answer your question in order to continue fvckig her - a**hole game for attraction with little sprinkles of beta here and there to maintain the minimum rapport while you better yourself outside of this b*tch.

Other than that you've already failed her sh*t tests and went beta - I wouldn't worry about anything more until you learn to have control of yourself. Women want you to be an immovable oak tree in the face of a hurricane and you have already shown your true colors far too early for forgiveness and to be able to regain her initial attraction for you.

 

[EbbsAndFlows]

Oneitised = ****, you're so right. I had my mind on 5 different women in the start and she couldn't get enough of me. I let her win.

When I didn't care about her I was money. I slipped up and she backed off until I was back to my original game. Same **** happening now, but at a lesser degree. My inner-game is slightly better, but not enough.

You're right though. **** her. Full no contact activated and I'll be ignoring her and giving her 1/4th of the attention I used to, if any.


For future reference:
Sh*t tests = coming whenever she beckons? Answering all her calls/texts?

Anyways, no contact. Focus on self. Next this one and maybe let her back in my life after I re-calibrate and maybe not ever. But, to your point, I've already shown a b1t<hmade side, so it's a wrap.

Needed some tough love. Back-burner b1tches are bout to get the heat turned up on 'em.

 

[Crownife]

from all the stuff I've read online...relationships are a combo of alpha and beta.

I don't know how great of an idea this is, let her know you're going out to a bar/club, or just hint at it that you're moving on?

 

[EbbsAndFlows]

I let my alpha:beta ratio get way outta wack. Only alpha traits I had both times she went cold was I had hobbies, I'm really aggressive at work and making big moves, and I still got chicks that blow up my phone. Everything else I let go beta. @ 4 months I should be 100% alpha.. even with an "independent", busy chick.. maybe even more so with her.

I'm not contacting her at all. I already revealed my interest levels = bad fkn idea. Only way she'll know I'm at the bar is if I'm at the same one as her spittin game on others. Hinting at moving on is some beta sh1t; she gets ice cold treatment. She'll know I'm movin on that way.

 

[Dgwizdal]

Oneitised = ****, you're so right. I had my mind on 5 different women in the start and she couldn't get enough of me. I let her win.

When I didn't care about her I was money. I slipped up and she backed off until I was back to my original game. Same **** happening now, but at a lesser degree. My inner-game is slightly better, but not enough.

You're right though. **** her. Full no contact activated and I'll be ignoring her and giving her 1/4th of the attention I used to, if any.


For future reference:
Sh*t tests = coming whenever she beckons? Answering all her calls/texts?

Anyways, no contact. Focus on self. Next this one and maybe let her back in my life after I re-calibrate and maybe not ever. But, to your point, I've already shown a b1t<hmade side, so it's a wrap.

Needed some tough love. Back-burner b1tches are bout to get the heat turned up on 'em.

Being too available and answering all her calls and texts isn't the **** test but is a tribute to your lack of challenge to her.

This was the sh*t test you failed miserably: After the fight she says she's confused because we aren't official and I'm acting distant. I turn B1TCHmade and try to apologize and all that. She pulls back heavy

All that was by her was an attempt at getting validation from you to see where you think they stand and then using it against you to gain the upper hand. IE: you fell into her frame and then the game switched just like that. Once she had you by the nuts and then you lost your spine and apologized, you essentially gave up your power, backbone, and revealed your beta cards

You did however eject immediately which was a good move. Keep workin on yourself and you'll no doubt be able handle anything ala amused mastery in the near future once you get your head right

 

[EbbsAndFlows]

"This was the sh*t test you failed miserably: After the fight she says she's confused because we aren't official and I'm acting distant. I turn B1TCHmade and try to apologize and all that. She pulls back heavy"
Yep. you have no idea how fu<kin faggy I felt IMMEDIATELY after doing it too. Instant regret, but the damage was done.

I knew eject this time was the right thing because it worked the first time. Difference is this time I didn't go total b1tchmade first (apology, validation), I just sensed that coldness and dipped. I keep pickin up my phone and going nope. Each day that goes I touch it less. Will be zero times tomorrow.

I don't even know if I want a 3rd try at this one. Kinda just want to take my early/mid game tools to a new prospect

 

[Dgwizdal]

from all the stuff I've read online...relationships are a combo of alpha and beta.

I don't know how great of an idea this is, let her know you're going out to a bar/club, or just hint at it that you're moving on?

Google 16 commandments of the poon and it will be a good start to your balance mentality. Yes beta aspects are needed for an LTR but when done randomly and spontaneously instead of a direct reward for one certain good behavior, she will always work to please as she will never know when it's going to come. Combine this with remaining dominant at all times and her Gina will tingle in your LTR forever.

And no matter what, never stop gaming her, always make her chase, and NEVER be afraid to walk away.

 

[EbbsAndFlows]

Repped.

Never stop gaming. I stopped gaming and got oneitis and it was the death of this relationship, even if she hasn't said so.