Recently married - wife incredibly jealous of mum of my son.

[BackInTheGame78]

No doubt he's been enabling it, so I agree that it would absolutely be an uphill battle at this point, but not impossible. He simply lacks the skill.

I speak from experience when I say women change when checked properly and consistently. And again, we're not aware of all her other qualities. This seems like such a trivial event to me, I would have a field day with a woman that acted up this way.

Having the balls to leave is great, but I'm just not phased enough by something so silly. It's cute, and I enjoy teasing too much.

It's never worth starting from the bottom of the Grand canyon because AT BEST he might get halfway up...but he still would be far beneath where the relationship started with no amount of work allowing him to even fully gain back the respect he has already lost.

At some point you simply have to cut your losses. It doesn't make sense to work 5 times as hard for not even half the results.

 

[EyeOnThePrize]

It's never worth starting from the bottom of the Grand canyon because AT BEST he might get halfway up...but he still would be far beneath where the relationship started with no amount of work allowing him to even fully gain back the respect he has already lost.

At some point you simply have to cut your losses. It doesn't make sense to work 5 times as hard for not even half the results.

The art of checking should be practiced constantly, in any relationship. That 'work' is developing the skills, which is the real reward, the relationship working out is the byproduct and cherry on top.

To seek a relationship that doesn't require work is unrealistic for anything long term. If your goal is flings then sure cut your losses, but this guy is already married. At the very least he can cut his teeth on this woman.

This 'Grand Canyon of respect' you speak of is not something he has to climb. He can teleport miles above it and check/tease any behavior that doesn't conform to his mindset. This checking would be required regardless of whether he started at the top or got there later.

 

[Elliot]

The art of checking should be practiced constantly, in any relationship. That 'work' is developing the skills, which is the real reward, the relationship working out is the byproduct and cherry on top.

To seek a relationship that doesn't require work is unrealistic for anything long term. If your goal is flings then sure cut your losses, but this guy is already married. At the very least he can cut his teeth on this woman.

This 'Grand Canyon of respect' you speak of is not something he has to climb. He can teleport miles above it and check/tease any behavior that doesn't conform to his mindset. This checking would be required regardless of whether he started at the top or got there later.

All - update - few weeks ago had the ‘ i think I want to break up’ after she cold shouldered on sex - said ok, that’s cool -go to your aunties - got vault face and she eventually grabbed me for sex - passionate for a few days then she was away in Thailand - she called 2x everyday - hints of jealousy again on calls . Came back last week - good sex a couple of times, blow job on period. She’s started work as a chef - yesterday got the ‘why does my husband think I should contribute per month’ (not a thing In Thai culture) and angrily shouts how much you want (have strategically not committed to anything formal) - said give what you feel you should - buy some groceries etc as
I’ve said for over a year - contribute when you can - (should have said £6k should cover my costs) she stormed out of house and went to her family (confirmed she was there) I called today and she was shouting down the phone - if I buy a bottle of shampoo would that make you happy you married me for a profit (absolute bull**** - I’ve been helping her out for a long time)- blown it a bit by texting apologies for not understanding her culture - how to regain The indifference?

flip side is she has no emotional/social filter - was in pub a couple of days ago - she video called and I showed her the friend I I was with - today she asked me if it was the boyfriend of my ex who I have a son with?? - are we plotting something???

as someone said - bad vetting on my part.

 

[Dr.Suave]

You still with her? @Desdinova already told you to get rid of her.

 

[Elliot]

You still with her? @Desdinova already told you to get rid of her.

Yep - have come to same conclusion - thinking of saying below to keep my sense of respect -

Your recent behaviour ((continuous false accusations based on jealousy and lack of respect about the emotional and financial support I’ve already given you) has fallen short of my expectations of a warm, feminine and loving wife - which is disappointing. I wish you good luck in your future.

 

[Desdinova]

She’s started work as a chef - yesterday got the ‘why does my husband think I should contribute per month’ (not a thing In Thai culture) and angrily shouts how much you want (have strategically not committed to anything formal) - said give what you feel you should - buy some groceries etc as
I’ve said for over a year - contribute when you can - (should have said £6k should cover my costs) she stormed out of house and went to her family

Let me give you some perspective on how finances work in my house. Other than the bills we've decided that each of us are paying, we pay for things dependent on how much extra cash we have. If I'm broke and I need new tires for my car, she buys them. If she's broke and needs new tires for her car, I buy them. The same goes for groceries. We never really question each other on it since we just work together on it. It all goes to the same household and the same family, so who the fvck cares? We go out and do 5hit all the time together, so we both use everything. We absolutely never fight about money. In fact, we never really fight. We have disagreements and arguments occasionally, but never anything on an earthquake level, and I like it that way.

As for your wife, I couldn't imagine living with a miserable piece of 5hit like that.

 

[Elliot]

Bro you married a jealous wh0re that only wants you for your money.
Bail fast, before she finds a way to get pregnant.

Reading some info about Teasing in these situations - how about texting - ’can you bring a bottle of shampoo when you come back . Ive been thinking about this whołe situation today, i sense like ive slid into beta bucks territory over her, after a 6 year period of being successful with short/longer term Partners Where money never cropped up (my ex with my son has also rarely asked for money - given £2k over 7 years.. She texted me that none of her boyfirends before ever ask her to suport costs - or in her words - asking money from me

 

[Elliot]

What are you trying to get out of this situation?
Staying married to this woman is a surefire way to get zeroed out once a baseline of financial support is established.

Been carrying on for 2 months okay but today reached final straw and I definitively kicked her out of the house - my sons birthday today - He came around about 11, with some cake from his party at his mum’s yesterday (my wife, who’s a pastry chef has also made an amazing cake) - went into kitchen and bang she was triggered - threw cake at wal and then me and boom - you want to be with her - my best present for you is me to go and you to go to his mum to be back together as happy family (in front of my son) -
Said you’ve
Crossed a line - get out of my house -
We’ll be divorcing (Also saw jealousy signs last night - chatting with a long term friend at a wedding - then my wife saying do you call her for sex when we have problems???? Closed down okay and danced together

at home -tried to turn jealousy into sex -
Got the but we had sex last night line? Said ok shame, missed out on a great end to goood day

this this morning.- tipping point reached - should have been done a while ago

 

[FlirtLife]

I hope you got a prenup.

 

[BeExcellent]

Ugh. Divorce her yesterday. She's not in Thailand & she is physically escalating. She thinks she has higher value than you.

Buh-Bye. Get out ASAP.

 

[BeExcellent]

She will use her body/sex to keep you hooked. Like any good hook er. That is what you married.

No matter how she tries to seduce you (to keep your financial support) you must say NO.

Understand this. Her sex appeal is ALL she has. Therefore if you do NOT allow her to seduce you, you take her power away.

This is about taking away her power now. Sex = power over you.

Once you take away her Sex=Power equation she is going to be the nastiest witch imaginable to deal with. The smile will dissolve and the fangs of this viper will be on full display. She will try to take you for everything she can because she doesn't care about you. She cares about $$$$$$$.

Read this 1000 times and get it through your head.

 

[BackInTheGame78]

She is very insecure and this will only get worse. Good luck, you'll need it.

Either that, or she is using it as a way to pick a fight which is even worse in terms of what it means.