Reasons why women get turned off

[Pandora]

I have been back dating. These are the reasons women have recently told me as to why they get turned off.

1.) This one chick is amazing. Totally sane and chill. Makes money. I ask her why she divorced her husband. Her response was
" he did not do the intimacy I wanted him to do" or " his love language" or " his sex was not what I wanted". I think she basically wanted rough sex and he was not doing it. Still not a reason to divorce but hey....


2.) This one is legit. "I cant have deep conversations with him. He is boring especially after being with you". So basically dont be boring guys. Many chicks complain that most guys dont listen. Most people suck at convos because they dont care about the other person. This is why some women feel a deep connection with men. I actually am interested or I fake it well. This is HUGE.


3.) He sent me a snapshot of his bank account ( or a pic of his car and boat etc). A girl im dating told me this and this also happend to my sister when she was dating. Dont ever flaunt your wealth. It comes across as super insecure and turns off non gold diggers. Men do this alot!

So learn how to have a conversation where you actually listen, dont be boring, dont act insecure and be good in bed. This will set you apart from 70% of men. Then you can get all the single mothers and left over chicks.

 

[RazorRambo24]

if I could sit and recall all the **** women told me about previous partners or other dudes they slept with.. i think it'd be a long list ..

but

1) Insecurity/neediness/anger problems/ possessive or controlling is prob at the top of the list

2) personality traits and whether the guy is admirable or got nothing going on in life , if he acts douchey, or is full of himself, is too nice or too friendly

3) sexual incompatibility / doing the wrong things in bed, not lasting long enough, being too rough, lasting too long, only caring about their own pleasure

4) vices like alcoholism, gambling, bad with money, rude to others, disgusting habits , bad hygiene, bad table manners, not respected by other people, bad reputation,

5) sleeps around alot, gives alot of girls attention, is a dog when it comes to women, typical douchebag behavior

6) lacks anything interesting about themselves, complains alot about stufff in life, negative attitude on life

 

[Pandora]

if I could sit and recall all the **** women told me about previous partners or other dudes they slept with.. i think it'd be a long list ..

but

1) Insecurity/neediness/anger problems/ possessive or controlling is prob at the top of the list

2) personality traits and whether the guy is admirable or got nothing going on in life , if he acts douchey, or is full of himself, is too nice or too friendly

3) sexual incompatibility / doing the wrong things in bed, not lasting long enough, being too rough, lasting too long, only caring about their own pleasure

4) vices like alcoholism, gambling, bad with money, rude to others, disgusting habits , bad hygiene, bad table manners, not respected by other people, bad reputation,

5) sleeps around alot, gives alot of girls attention, is a dog when it comes to women, typical douchebag behavior

6) lacks anything interesting about themselves, complains alot about stufff in life, negative attitude on life

This is actually a better list than mine. More comprehensive. Spot on. We rag on women alot but men aint that much better. Avoiding these things will lead you to stand out from most guys. I was surprised at how many dudes have these issues.

Women are not all to blame.

 

[RazorRambo24]

This is actually a better list than mine. More comprehensive. Spot on. We rag on women alot but men aint that much better. Avoiding these things will lead you to stand out from most guys. I was surprised at how many dudes have these issues.

Women are not all to blame.

Yeah I think this kind of stuff is great reinforcement for men to know and rehearse. and man, I've heard crazy stories from women.. where I know that alot of men are way crazier than some of these women. As a man, we should always expect women to be gentle, sensitive an emotional.. If you start looking at women any other way, she's either super masculinized or you just don't have the confidence to take control or know when to step away. Many women are just walking all over guys who allow themselves to be walked all over as a means of coping with their own past traumas.. Sadly, those who have been used/victimized before or felt like they lost personal power at some point in life, will often utilize weaker people with less boundaries to be agents in helping them regain personal power or feel more confident, which sometimes means a horrible experience. Alot of time they're not even doing this consciously with intentions to hurt anyone.. kinda just happens.

another thing is :

Alot of men discount greatly how much a woman values a man who has drive, passion in life, has things that he built for himself, whether a great tribe of friends, a business, a great career, a nice apartment, condo, home, - has hobbies or activities hes passionate about and involves himself in, has some kind of mission or passions about life and humanity or progressing or represents certain ideals, even if its politics and he is a staunch representation of one ideal like conservative/right wing or w.e , or if he stands for like his strong Christian beliefs or is big on creating a change in his career industry or has ideas that hes working on.. or goals where he's an athlete and passionately wants to win a NCAA D1 National Championship.. Or even being passionate abut fitness goals, and wanting to compete in the NPC or IFBB..

Even simpler sht like having a japanese custom and having goals to make it more JDM and add more sht and get it stanced and do a buncha cool sht to it.. or something even more niche like a dude who rap battles for a league and wants to be the best at that.. These kind of things show drive, initiative, personality.

 

[Giovanni SouthSide]

another more stimulating guy came thru

 

[FlirtLife]

1.) This one chick is amazing. Totally sane and chill. Makes money. I ask her why she divorced her husband. Her response was
" he did not do the intimacy I wanted him to do" or " his love language" or " his sex was not what I wanted". I think she basically wanted rough sex and he was not doing it. Still not a reason to divorce but hey....

She said "his love language", which is also the title of a book she may have read:

https://www.amazon.com/Love-Languages-Secret-that-Lasts/dp/080241270X

But since "Fifty Shades" was the top selling book of the past decade, "rough sex and he was not doing it" could be a factor.

 

[BMX]

You aren't a dem. It's that black & white right now. Enjoy the decline tho.

 

[retardedautist2020]

Why do you guys care so much about what women think? Who gives a damn about them. You guys are falling into their frame.

 

[EyeBRollin]

Women can get turned off by anything. You wore blue today but her abusive ex boyfriend crashed her dream car which also happened to be blue.

Point is, don’t waste time thinking about the crap going on in women’s heads. They don’t even understand themselves.

 

[bmp2cpm]

Why do you guys care so much about what women think? Who gives a damn about them. You guys are falling into their frame.

This! Never pay attention to a women’s words. Not even your own mother’s words. Only pay attention to a woman’s actions.

You ask a nice girl why things didn’t work out in the last relationship and you’ll get nice reasons because she is a nice girl.

Women want control of resources. That means they crave an emotional connection from a resourceful guy. S*x is an essential part of maintaining the emotional connection.

Once things become unbalanced resource-wise, the relationship ends, eg he loses his job, his career is failing, she makes more than him, or he shares his resources with other women, or he does not stand up for her at a crucial moment, or he is not working his as* off to be with her right after a loved one passes.

Women are extremely predictable and easy to understand IF YOU STOP PAYING ATTENTION TO THEIR WORDS. Be a good listener but take what they say with a grain of salt and focus on their actions only. This is how a resourceful man leads.

 

[bmp2cpm]

I have been back dating. These are the reasons women have recently told me as to why they get turned off.

1.) This one chick is amazing. Totally sane and chill. Makes money.

2.) This one is legit. "I cant have deep conversations with him.


3.) He sent me a snapshot of his bank account ( or a pic of his car and boat etc). A girl im dating told me this and this also happend to my sister when she was dating.

Here are the actual reasons it did not work:

1) She made more than him.

2) No chemistry and therefore no emotional connection.

3) The guy rushed things before she could properly vet him.

 

[BeExcellent]

Advice from the old lady:

Interesting list. Look. All people have flaws. Then there are deal breaker type flaws. Men have them, women have them.

So when people emerge from a relationship that ultimately breaks off it is inevitably the result of the flaws of both people, although distribution is often unequal. At times you marry someone before life has dealt you any serious shjt. Then you learn on the fly and already married whether or not you picked a winner, but you cannot always know this ahead of time.

This happened to me. I married my first husband who felt like he was riding high, running his nightclub business, entrepreneurial, socially charming, respectful of his family, great lover, great friend, etc. After we married a business partner double crossed him, knocked him down, he had to jettison/sell his share of the business. He never recovered. He began drinking (he had not touched alcohol for many years when we met & married), he lost all drive & ambition, became depressed.

I was supportive for the next 15 years. I said no problem, my business is doing well, you do house spouse and I’ll make the money. I offered to help him any way I could. And I became his enabler of laziness. Over time my respect for him eroded. He would say he was going to get himself together etc etc etc, but he never did. Nothing motivated him.

I eventually divorced him because I did not want to continue setting a dysfunctional example of marriage for my children. A weak dependent father who is lazy and without drive or ambition. Not the type relationship I ever wanted to see my children in. Not the kind of man I wanted my son to become.

So it was a combination of loss of respect and the dysfunctional relationship example we were modeling for the children.

Best. Decision. Ever.

But that was a lot to unpack for men I would date.

So I’d summarize to say he fell into a depression after he lost his business and drinking heavily and after many years I realized I couldn’t change another human being, so there was no option but to leave.

I was also angry a lot over time at his weakness & failure to act like a man, but that is not a good place to start when explaining the whole situation.

People see for themselves why I divorced him over time. And they understand why.

So part of dating is a less is more approach. Over sharing is often less than ideal.

 

[Bokanovsky]

Women can get turned off by anything. You wore blue today but her abusive ex boyfriend crashed her dream car which also happened to be blue.

Point is, don’t waste time thinking about the crap going on in women’s heads. They don’t even understand themselves.

Disagree. If a woman has a high level of attraction, she will not be easily turned off even if you conduct yourself like a complete idiot. Why do you think women stay with all sorts of losers, lowlifes and otherwise objectively undesirable men? Because for whatever reason, they find them subjectively attractive. And attraction is not a choice. But if she's not that into you, she will come up with a long list of flaws even where none exist.

 

[Bokanovsky]

This is actually a better list than mine. More comprehensive. Spot on. We rag on women alot but men aint that much better. Avoiding these things will lead you to stand out from most guys. I was surprised at how many dudes have these issues.

Women are not all to blame.

While I agree that many men ain't that much better, you have to take these tales that women tell about their exes with a grain of salt. Women love nothing more than painting themselves as victims. This is actually their mating strategy. The believe (oftentimes correctly) that this activates a protective instinct in men which, in turn, makes men treat them better. In other words, it's a type of manipulation. From personal experience, the most honest/least manipulative women I've dated volunteered little about their exes. And conversely, the more she complains about her ex, the more likely she is to be a deceitful, narcissistic psychopath.

 

[Robert28]

While I agree that many men ain't that much better, you have to take these tales that women tell about their exes with a grain of salt. Women love nothing more than painting themselves as victims. This is actually their mating strategy. The believe (oftentimes correctly) that this activates a protective instinct in men which, in turn, makes men treat them better. In other words, it's a type of manipulation. From personal experience, the most honest/least manipulative women I've dated volunteered little about their exes. And conversely, the more she complains about her ex, the more likely she is to be a deceitful, narcissistic psychopath.

100% right in everything you said!

 

[Ricky]

This is one of the better discussions on here in awhile.

I will add one based on my recent relationship issues.
Women hate arrogance. Its a given that people take each other for granted over time. That happens for both parties. Whatever great things you have going on… money, muscles, game become the norm and the baseline for her

When a woman starts pulling away and starts getting attention from lower value men its natural to point out the obvious. “I am better than that loser you are talking to because i have X, Y or Z”

Unfortunately that can be taken as arrogance. Since we live in a competitive world its natural to want to badmouth competitors but its a turnoff to women.

 

[Gamisch]

This! Never pay attention to a women’s words. Not even your own mother’s words. Only pay attention to a woman’s actions.

You ask a nice girl why things didn’t work out in the last relationship and you’ll get nice reasons because she is a nice girl.

Women want control of resources. That means they crave an emotional connection from a resourceful guy. S*x is an essential part of maintaining the emotional connection.

Once things become unbalanced resource-wise, the relationship ends, eg he loses his job, his career is failing, she makes more than him, or he shares his resources with other women, or he does not stand up for her at a crucial moment, or he is not working his as* off to be with her right after a loved one passes.

Women are extremely predictable and easy to understand IF YOU STOP PAYING ATTENTION TO THEIR WORDS. Be a good listener but take what they say with a grain of salt and focus on their actions only. This is how a resourceful man leads.

This. Allthough both lists are good, under the "right circumstances " she might view all these negatives as positive things. Yes even egotistical sexual performance. Some women just want to be treated roughh, and sweet love making can turn her off.

razorrambo 's post could as well be a "badboy" . This might be the types of complaints YOU'LL hear ,yet she wont leave him...think about it. How often did you encounter a woman (probably gave you hope ) telling you all this about her "situation ship". You thought it would be easy to get her, untill you learned she is full of shyte and if you hang arounda little longer you might even get sympathy for her " azzhole bf".

This is typical male thinking. We want logic. So we make a list of x number of things, but in reality there could be a million reasons why she's turned off. On the other hand you can narrow it down to " someone else in the picture " and /or " shelf life expired". At some piont she doesn't like the laces in your shoes, and shell hate the color of your door bell..

 

[Macadellic]

Who dafuk gives a care
about what women get turned off by?

I have nothing to prove
She has everything to prove

With her small window of fertility.

Woman are milk
Men are wine.

DEAL WITH IT

 

[jhonny9546]

if I could sit and recall all the **** women told me about previous partners or other dudes they slept with.. i think it'd be a long list ..

but

1) Insecurity/neediness/anger problems/ possessive or controlling is prob at the top of the list

2) personality traits and whether the guy is admirable or got nothing going on in life , if he acts douchey, or is full of himself, is too nice or too friendly

3) sexual incompatibility / doing the wrong things in bed, not lasting long enough, being too rough, lasting too long, only caring about their own pleasure

4) vices like alcoholism, gambling, bad with money, rude to others, disgusting habits , bad hygiene, bad table manners, not respected by other people, bad reputation,

5) sleeps around alot, gives alot of girls attention, is a dog when it comes to women, typical douchebag behavior

6) lacks anything interesting about themselves, complains alot about stufff in life, negative attitude on life

2 and 3 are really things you "can't ask", but you have somehow to notice.

 

[BaronOfHair]

2.) This one is legit. "I cant have deep conversations with him. He is boring especially after being with you". So basically dont be boring guys. Many chicks complain that most guys dont listen. Most people suck at convos because they dont care about the other person. This is why some women feel a deep connection with men. I actually am interested or I fake it well. This is HUGE.


3.) He sent me a snapshot of his bank account ( or a pic of his car and boat etc). A girl im dating told me this and this also happend to my sister when she was dating. Dont ever flaunt your wealth. It comes across as super insecure and turns off non gold diggers. Men do this alot!

Hell, one can even kill two Kennedy brothers with 1 bullet, by regaling the ladies with tales of fighting alongside The United Liberation Movement of Liberia for Democracy

And regularly preparing victory dinners with them afterwards