Reason to live?

[squirrels]

What's your reason to live?

I'm wondering because I don't have one. I don't really LIVE for anything. The things I want in life...wealth, love, success...I feel like I want them because they're appropriate "default objectives". They seem like the next logical step.

But when I ask myself, deep down, what is it I REALLY WANT out of life, I come up blank. There's nothing about this life that I'm driven to obtain or accomplish. The goals I set for myself are just for the sake of having goals, so I don't feel so stagnant. But nothing really moves my soul any more.

I know now that's why people say the things about me that they do...that I'm cold and mechanical with everything I do, from martial arts to my job to sex. There's no passion, no flow, no ART.

I'm not sure why I stay alive...God knows I get the thought in my head of swallowing a bullet every so often. Without passion a man is pretty much dead anyway. But I keep hanging on because if I go now, I'm afraid I'm going to miss that thing I feel passionately about when it finally makes itself known and I'll have wasted a life that could have been worth something.

When you sit down quietly by yourself, and REALLY think about everything that life has to offer, is it possible for you to pick out ONE thing that you passionately desire from it? I can pick out many things, but they're more idle wishes than something I feel driven to acquire or accomplish. To this point, I haven't honestly been able to look at ANYTHING life has to offer and say, "YES, THIS is what I want" with any kind of conviction.

I hate not being driven. I hate not being passionate. I feel dead. If it's possible to know what being dead feels like while you're still drawing air, then this has got to be pretty close.

What is it you live for? And how did you find that THAT is what you want from life?

 

[squirrels]

Squirrels, although there is a big age difference between us, I can relate to what you wrote. I made a similar thread a couple of weeks ago, http://www.sosuave.net/forum/showthread.php?t=112881&highlight=Exp

How long have you felt this way?

As long as I can remember.

Thing is...you're still in high school. I'm 27. Everyone feels like this at some point in their life. I just never STOPPED feeling this way.

 

[ChrizZ]

What's your reason to live?

I'm wondering because I don't have one. I don't really LIVE for anything. The things I want in life...wealth, love, success...I feel like I want them because they're appropriate "default objectives". They seem like the next logical step.

But when I ask myself, deep down, what is it I REALLY WANT out of life, I come up blank. There's nothing about this life that I'm driven to obtain or accomplish. The goals I set for myself are just for the sake of having goals, so I don't feel so stagnant. But nothing really moves my soul any more.

I know now that's why people say the things about me that they do...that I'm cold and mechanical with everything I do, from martial arts to my job to sex. There's no passion, no flow, no ART.

I'm not sure why I stay alive...God knows I get the thought in my head of swallowing a bullet every so often. Without passion a man is pretty much dead anyway. But I keep hanging on because if I go now, I'm afraid I'm going to miss that thing I feel passionately about when it finally makes itself known and I'll have wasted a life that could have been worth something.

When you sit down quietly by yourself, and REALLY think about everything that life has to offer, is it possible for you to pick out ONE thing that you passionately desire from it? I can pick out many things, but they're more idle wishes than something I feel driven to acquire or accomplish. To this point, I haven't honestly been able to look at ANYTHING life has to offer and say, "YES, THIS is what I want" with any kind of conviction.

I hate not being driven. I hate not being passionate. I feel dead. If it's possible to know what being dead feels like while you're still drawing air, then this has got to be pretty close.

What is it you live for? And how did you find that THAT is what you want from life?

That´s a good question. Right now, I´m not living. I´m feeling dead all the time. The only thing that keeps me alive is the thought that I´ll leave my $hitty life that I´m living right now behind. In about 6 months I´ll be back in the US and study there and visit all my friends. That´s the only thing that keeps me motivated not to put a bullet in my head. Life can be hell, but it can also be heaven. I´ve seen both. I don´t wanna sound like a drama queen cuz I´m smart enough to know that bad times will eventually pass if you don´t give up and stick to your goals. If life is a biatch, go punch it in the face.

 

[squirrels]

I´m smart enough to know that bad times will eventually pass if you don´t give up and stick to your goals.

That's just it...I have no goals to stick to except the artificial ones I set just for the sake of having goals. I'm not in "bad times" right now...I'm really not in ANY "times". I just am.

I'd rather be in bad times with a goal I'm passionate about than be stuck where I am now.

 

[WesCottII]

Why are they artificial goals? Just because they're cliche, it doesn't mean they arn't worth working towards.

Everyone wants to "be rich", but very few actually do it, many want "a good body" but again....not so many have. They're worthy goals....

 

[ChrizZ]

That's just it...I have no goals to stick to except the artificial ones I set just for the sake of having goals. I'm not in "bad times" right now...I'm really not in ANY "times". I just am.

I'd rather be in bad times with a goal I'm passionate about than be stuck where I am now.[/

Trust me, you wouldn´t want that.

The reason why you´re not passionate anymore is probably because you´re doing the same stuff everyday. Try something new. Learn a new sport, lift weights, go out and try to pick up women and start a relationship etc. Anything that CHALLENGES you mentally and/or physically and that you enjoy to do. Just try something new. Life has a lot to offer to those who enjoy it. Right now you´re just existing. Start to LIVE...

 

[eminence]

I think everyone, on and off this board, feels like this at one point or another...most of us on this board feel like this now, or else we wouldn't be here looking to better ourselves. You can look at life in two ways:

You live to die

OR

Your dying to live.

If you make the best out of life and choose the latter, then eventually you will find something your passionate about whether your 18 or 45. It could be a sport, a goal, a hobby, or even a woman.

However if you go through life with the mentality of living as a drone who just wants to exist and get by another day, then you won't be very happy. Right now at 18, I find myself somewhere in a transition phase. I'm not quite where I want to be, but I can almost taste it now..and I know when I can finally take the bite, it's going to be the sweetest thing i've ever tasted. Just knowing that someday it will happen is enough to continue living for me.

I liked your O.P. squirrel, maybe you should take up writing.

 

[Bible_Belt]

To this point, I haven't honestly been able to look at ANYTHING life has to offer and say, "YES, THIS is what I want" with any kind of conviction.

So then keep looking. Something intangible must appeal to you: a religion or a spiritual philosophy, charity work, social issues, etc. The world is full of people who need some kind of help. If you can find a way to enjoy helping people, it's much easier to find significance in your life.

 

[Dead By Dawn]

First of all, I am ten years younger than you (only 17) so maybe I cannot offer you any insight. I think that this is a natural stage to go through for everyone, especially someone who has found a site like this that teaches self-improvement. I can remember before I could get a girl that I thought "if only I could get her", I dedicated myself to the pursuit of women, with emphasis on pursuit. It became life consuming, after a few weeks I did not want a woman but women. The focus was no longer on enjoying women but pursuing women. When you focus on one aspect of your life in that way it is common to view all of life like that. When you focus on pursuing eventually you pursue life instead of enjoying it, believe that there is some object you have to pursue in order to be happy.

I do not know why it happened but one day, as suddenly as I came to this site, I thought "what for? Why am I relentlessly pursuing women?" Then came a sort of depression, as removing women's approval from my life was like removing the Sun from the Earth, I felt as if there was no order or purpose and I was just floating around in space not controlling my movements. I must admit that at this point I lost all interest in social interaction whereas before that had been what I lived for. Outside of school I did not bother talking to anyone and would only go out occasionally to play basketball.

Well, needless to say, I had much spare time. I thought that there must be answers for me somewhere, so I read many works that are considered wise in an attempt to place some purpose on my apparently meaningless life. The Bible was one of the main texts I studied, and also turned me Christian a few months later on. At this point I was depressed though it was a personal depression as I did not want anyone to know.

What did I come to believe that the purpose of life was? Well, while I was in this state of depression I put more effort into my school work and such. I started to develop interests in "nerdy" things such as physics, chemistry, maths and literature. Art and music have also become very important to me. I just developed an appreciation of the universe and our condition that I had not felt before. I wanted to understand through physics, why bundles of energy and atoms caused me to feel happy or depressed. I decided that I would dedicate my life to understanding how and why. I probably had always wanted to do that, I was just worried about what others would think about my passion. I realised that with the best social status of the school I was not really happy, I looked at those who I considered my social inferiors and I was surprised to see they were happy, they didn't even have loads of girls flirting with them and they're happy.

Well my appreciation of the universe and The Bible eventually led to Christianity which is another large part of my life. I am glad to say that I enjoy socialising again and, though I do not spend half as much time socialising as I used to, I am very happy with life. If I could sum up the post in one sentence it would be: Your purpose in life is something that cannot be restrained by another person, nobody can take away my appreciation of the beauty of the universe and my desire to understand it. Hey, it could be viewed as nerdy, worthless, stupid by others, but I've been where the "others" have been, and I know where I believe the grass to be greener.


Self improvement only goes so far before you hit the local maximum, then it all just seems to shoot downwards but please, whatever thoughts you get, do not turn to vices or suicide for relief because eventually an answer will reach you. It's just living in accordance with your soul and enjoying the journey along the way to finding your passions in life.

Well maybe this post was way too long and didn't help you at all. But I wish you, and any other person who feels nihilistic, all the best in finding your purpose in life and I can assure you that I have felt that "dead" feeling in life and my thoughts were akin to Hamlet's, but when you find THAT all the pain and nihilism you have suffered will be forgotten, you will look back and think "how stupid I was, how could I not see?" and you will thank the feelings you have now because ignorance may be bliss but when you find that real happiness that cannot be taken from you and is in accordance to your soul it will be a 1000x bliss.

Hope I helped in some way, good luck.

 

[Second]

Money goes away, your body breaks down, religion is a set of rules that can never satisfy anything other than a need to feel justified, and a beautiful looking woman can be a source of more torture than anything else...

I live for Christ.

I woke up about a year ago, when my car smashed into a wall going 70 mph. I never wear my seatbelt. Looking at pictures of my car you would think i would be dead. I went to the ER, and as far as the doctors were concerned i should've broken my nose, fractured my kneecaps, broken a few ribs if my seatbelt was on, or been ejected through the windshield if i wasn't wearing it. I had a cut on my chest, that's all. No broken bones, not even a hairline fracture, nothing.
I was too sore to do anything else so for literally a week straight, i stayed in my room and wondered, "Why am i alive?"
I went to a churchish thing that sunday. And i read,
"The righteous man may have many problems,
but the LORD delivers him from them all.
He will protect all of his bones,
not one of them will be broken."

I had been a "christian-kinda" before that, but this past year I've earnestly lived for Him. And this past year has by far been the greatest, most blessed, crazy year in my life.
Consider this possibility, there is a chance that there is an ALL-POWERFUL, INFINITE GOD. There's a good chance that everything you can fathom, was created by that one being. And if He created you, there is a good chance that, that Infinite Amazing God, actually gives a rip about you. Cares enough to look at you when you're lost and depressed, and show up. Cares enough to DIE for you. An all-powerful, perfect in every way God, let the people spit on him, punch him, mock him, torture him, and crucify him, because he knew you, loved you, and wanted you to be able to take up his sacrifice, and live with Him, and experience His holiness and goodness.
I know that God, and when He comes, everything else goes away.
I know that He loves you as much as He loves me.
I know that you can find Him if you want Him and need Him, you can look away from the computer screen right now and try to start to talk to Him. You can read the Bible and try to learn about Him.
It's up to you if you want to live for something real or not.

 

[RedPill]

Squirrels,

Here's how I think of life, and what to do with it:

As far as I can tell, we only get one shot at this thing - so why not take it to the limits, just for sh1ts & giggles? It's like playing golf - you're keeping score against yourself, and always trying to improve your game simply for the challenge of it. Life is a game.

Some people's childhoods have given them natural inclinations for what to do with their life. Sometimes that's a result of our lineage. A good example would be the children of pro athletes who also become athletes. Another would be children whose parents push them to cultivate skill sets at a very early age. Perhaps there is a family business. For those of us who weren't so fortunate as to be born into nepotism or given some natural direction with which to take our lives, we have to develop our own aspirations.

---------

My two life ambitions are 1) Experience life at the top of the capitalistic mountain, and 2) Captivate the imaginations of millions through an artistic endeavour.

Now I don't know exactly how the journey that will get me there will take place, or in what form my ambitions will be actualized, but I do know that everything I'm doing these days is a step in the right direction. I see everything else that happens along the way - women, possible kids, the places I travel, the people I meet, the things I do, as byproducts of the whole experience.

It's taken me many years of introspection, reading, and life adventures to get to this point, and I still have a very long road ahead of me to realize my dreams. Most of my time right now is devoted to building my first business. It's a crazy adventure, to say the least. When this project is complete in a couple years, it should afford me complete financial independence, which will allow me to take on new, more advanced projects that get me one step closer to making my dreams reality.

----------
Squirrels, what are your talents? What kind of life do you want to experience before your life's energy is released back into the ether? Don't ask yourself what should do, or what you want to do, but rather what can you do? And most importantly, what inspires you? If you're lacking inspiration, that's the first place to start.

Inspiration -----> Inspired Imagination -----> Vision ------> Action ------> Reality

In the world I'm creating for myself, this is the order of operations, but all these items have to be working all the time, like pistons firing in an engine. We create our own reality every day. If you aren't inspired every day, the engine misfires. If you don't have any sort of over-arching vision in your life, you won't be able drive very fast. No action = no acceleration. Does this analogy work for you?

It sounds like inspiration is what's missing for you. Seek that. It's something most people never find. You might find it in the arts, science, humanities, history, reading biographies, travelling to foreign cultures, doing volunteer work, going to concerts, following sports, or reading success stories. Whatever it is that you do, be inspired by ideas rather than people, culture, or events. Ideas transcend time, everything else is fleeting.

 

[THE_ADDMAN]

The journey never ends, my friend. The suave keep going.

If you feel like you have no reason to live, why dont u try some charity work?

helping the less fortunate can really give you new perspective on life and the 'journey'

 

[Spike_the_Dragon]

"The Stone Cutter"

There was once a stone cutter who was dissatisfied with himself and with his position in life.

One day he passed a wealthy merchant's house. Through the open gateway, he saw many fine possessions and important visitors. "How powerful that merchant must be!" thought the stone cutter. He became very envious and wished that he could be like the merchant.

To his great surprise, he suddenly became the merchant, enjoying more luxuries and power than he had ever imagined, but envied and detested by those less wealthy than himself. Soon a high official passed by, carried in a sedan chair, accompanied by attendants and escorted by soldiers beating gongs. Everyone, no matter how wealthy, had to bow low before the procession. "How powerful that official is!" he thought. "I wish that I could be a high official!"

Then he became the high official, carried everywhere in his embroidered sedan chair, feared and hated by the people all around. It was a hot summer day, so the official felt very uncomfortable in the sticky sedan chair. He looked up at the sun. It shone proudly in the sky, unaffected by his presence. "How powerful the sun is!" he thought. "I wish that I could be the sun!"

Then he became the sun, shining fiercely down on everyone, scorching the fields, cursed by the farmers and laborers. But a huge black cloud moved between him and the earth, so that his light could no longer shine on everything below. "How powerful that storm cloud is!" he thought. "I wish that I could be a cloud!"

Then he became the cloud, flooding the fields and villages, shouted at by everyone. But soon he found that he was being pushed away by some great force, and realized that it was the wind. "How powerful it is!" he thought. "I wish that I could be the wind!"

Then he became the wind, blowing tiles off the roofs of houses, uprooting trees, feared and hated by all below him. But after a while, he ran up against something that would not move, no matter how forcefully he blew against it - a huge, towering rock. "How powerful that rock is!" he thought. "I wish that I could be a rock!"

Then he became the rock, more powerful than anything else on earth. But as he stood there, he heard the sound of a hammer pounding a chisel into the hard surface, and felt himself being changed. "What could be more powerful than I, the rock?" he thought.

He looked down and saw far below him the figure of a stone cutter...

 

[[S]alvatore]

^
Nice

 

[CLOONEY]

Your friends.

Your family.

Your partner.

My mum once said to me, I dont invest in material possessions, I invest in relationships. This made pefect sense to me!

As for your feelings, it sounds like depression to me. I am not an expert in the field, and know its a very tough thing to pull yourself out of the hole once you are in it (I know first hand, after seeing my dad living with it every day, and eventually taking the easy way out by committing suicide)! I would say you should do some volunteer work, to see how good your life is in comparison to some people out there. People dying with Cancer at a young age, HIV victims and their absolute horror at being dianogsed with the disease and what they go through mentally and physically! I would say that this is one way of seeing the things you should appreciate in life, they will tell you, and they will tell you in a much more passionate way than anyone else on this forum could possibly put accross to you! It will hit you straight in the heart! Afterall, its the simple things like family, the love for your partner and their love in return, and just the great moments you experience along the way that make life worth living! But in 99.99% of cases I have seen, its not until too late that people realise such a simple, obvious thing!

 

[Scrumtulescence]

There was once a stone cutter who was dissatisfied with himself and with his position in life.

One day he passed a wealthy merchant's house. Through the open gateway, he saw many fine possessions and important visitors. "How powerful that merchant must be!" thought the stone cutter. He became very envious and wished that he could be like the merchant.

To his great surprise, he suddenly became the merchant, enjoying more luxuries and power than he had ever imagined, but envied and detested by those less wealthy than himself. Soon a high official passed by, carried in a sedan chair, accompanied by attendants and escorted by soldiers beating gongs. Everyone, no matter how wealthy, had to bow low before the procession. "How powerful that official is!" he thought. "I wish that I could be a high official!"

Then he became the high official, carried everywhere in his embroidered sedan chair, feared and hated by the people all around. It was a hot summer day, so the official felt very uncomfortable in the sticky sedan chair. He looked up at the sun. It shone proudly in the sky, unaffected by his presence. "How powerful the sun is!" he thought. "I wish that I could be the sun!"

Then he became the sun, shining fiercely down on everyone, scorching the fields, cursed by the farmers and laborers. But a huge black cloud moved between him and the earth, so that his light could no longer shine on everything below. "How powerful that storm cloud is!" he thought. "I wish that I could be a cloud!"

Then he became the cloud, flooding the fields and villages, shouted at by everyone. But soon he found that he was being pushed away by some great force, and realized that it was the wind. "How powerful it is!" he thought. "I wish that I could be the wind!"

Then he became the wind, blowing tiles off the roofs of houses, uprooting trees, feared and hated by all below him. But after a while, he ran up against something that would not move, no matter how forcefully he blew against it - a huge, towering rock. "How powerful that rock is!" he thought. "I wish that I could be a rock!"

Then he became the rock, more powerful than anything else on earth. But as he stood there, he heard the sound of a hammer pounding a chisel into the hard surface, and felt himself being changed. "What could be more powerful than I, the rock?" he thought.

He looked down and saw far below him the figure of a stone cutter...

I almost thought that was deep for a second...

 

[Holland]

Oh, that's an easy one.

The purpose of life is to enjoy it. Go after the things you want, have fun, make others happy, make yourself happy, love and appreciate.

For me, it's skateboarding, learning about women and social dynamics, loving women, laughing with my homeboys, educate others and being at bliss. I don't know how I got at it. Skateboarding was cause I thought it would be fun, women cause I wasn't getting any . Who cares, I enjoy it and that's what counts.

 

[Demon]

*ahem*

 

[Donsing]

I did not read all of the reply's but I read most of them to know the major "theme". Self improvement does not reach a max because if you really knew yourself, you would know that you are always learning and can improve yourself, slowly but surely. Work on your character, recognize that everybody has unlimited potential, if one person can do something than other people can too, and know that their are infinite things that can be reawakened from its hibernating period if you just acknowledge it and work toward it. Become a person with brilliancy, who brings happiness to everybody by just waking into a room. Look at all the good things in people and love everybody. Don't just love their personality, but their true being who can do anything and everything. I will leave you with this by Christian D. Larson:

Thus sings the poet, and we call him sentimental; that is, at first thought we do. But upon second thought we change our minds. We then find that faults and defects are always in the minority, and that the larger part of human nature is so wonderful and so beautiful that it needs must inspire admiration and love in everybody. With all their defects there is nothing more interesting than human beings; and the reason is that for every shortcoming in man there are a thousand admirable qualities. The poet, being inspired by the sublime vision of truth, can see this; therefore, what can he do but love? Whenever his eyes are lifted and whenever his thoughts take wings, his soul declares with greater eloguence than ever before, " What a piece of work is man!" Thus every moment renews his admiration, and every thought rekindles the fire of his love.

 

[thefonz]

I have several titles I want to live through in this body including.....

Chemist
Literary Writer
Musician
Father
Businessman
Leader
Playboy
Comedian
Lover
Giver
Seducer
Traveler
Motivator
Life of the Crowd/Party
Bodybuilder

There's others but there are my big ones