Really can't respect women.

[FortunateSon]

I asked a girl out today and she said "yes", but she didn't seem to interested, happy or excited about it. She kept a straight face and had a wooden posture, I knew instantly that she wasn't interested and that was confirmed by her ignoring me as if I don't exist after I had asked her.

Seriously, I'm so used to rejection from women that it doesn't even phase me and do you know what if she had said no, I'd have been absolutely fine with it, I'd have kept her as a friend and got her to link me up with some of her friends. But no, she has to be dishonest, she has to BS about her interest level and then because she is a coward now has to ignore me in the vain hope that I get the hint.

Oh dear, oh dear, women really are inferior to men.
/Rant.

 

[El Payaso]

I hear ya. It comes with the territory. I always chuckle to myself when a girl feigns interest. I just tip my hat and leave. I like it because it cuts my work for me and helps me to focus on the high interest women.

 

[FortunateSon]

I hear ya. It comes with the territory. I always chuckle to myself when a girl feigns interest. I just tip my hat and leave. I like it because it cuts my work for me and helps me to focus on the high interest women.

Yeah that's one bonus is that I won't be wasting my effort, money and time on this girl.

Tell me how do I handle the situation if she stops ignoring me? If she carries on ignoring me that's fine, but if she comes up to me next time I see her to strike up a conversation, how do I respond? Do I talk to her normally or just ignore her? How would you handle it?

 

[nousername]

The fact that you perceived things that way means that it's an issue about
yourself that you actually need to deal with.

If women aren't responding the way you want them to, it's your fault. Never theirs.

Once you accept this you can really take a step back and look at the whole picture, and then figure out what needs to be done. People make the mistake of thinking they "deserve" a hot woman in their life. When really, why?

What makes you so special to be deserving of this great woman? And even if she isn't great, maybe her perception is that she is greater than you, and if that is the case, and you know you're superior, it wouldn't affect you and you'd move on. Some people, not women, PEOPLE, are just a little lost themselves and that's why it's important to understand this and actually come from a more helpful, teaching state of mind.

Most of the time if a woman behaves this way, she's got issues she needs to deal with aswell. As do you. As do we all.

<3

 

[FortunateSon]

The fact that you perceived things that way means that it's an issue about
yourself that you actually need to deal with.

If women aren't responding the way you want them to, it's your fault. Never theirs.

Once you accept this you can really take a step back and look at the whole picture, and then figure out what needs to be done. People make the mistake of thinking they "deserve" a hot woman in their life. When really, why?

What makes you so special to be deserving of this great woman? And even if she isn't great, maybe her perception is that she is greater than you, and if that is the case, and you know you're superior, it wouldn't affect you and you'd move on. Some people, not women, PEOPLE, are just a little lost themselves and that's why it's important to understand this and actually come from a more helpful, teaching state of mind.

Most of the time if a woman behaves this way, she's got issues she needs to deal with aswell. As do you. As do we all.

<3

Where to start with this?

Nowhere have I ever said or ever thought that I deserve a woman, hot or not.

Secondly the annoyance isn't with her rejecting me, I couldn't care less about rejection, my problem is with girls and their sh*tty behaviour.

My point is I try to respect women but I find myself unable to do so because of their sh*tty behaviour.

Thanks for your input though bro.

 

[nousername]

Where to start with this?

Nowhere have I ever said or ever thought that I deserve a woman, hot or not.

Secondly the annoyance isn't with her rejecting me, I couldn't care less about rejection, my problem is with girls and their sh*tty behaviour.

My point is I try to respect women but I find myself unable to do so because of their sh*tty behaviour.

Thanks for your input though bro.

I agree with you.

You said that you are unable to respect women because of their sh1tty behaviour. Why?

Why does it matter if they give you sh1tty behavior?

You don't have to answer me, but in most cases i think you'll find that the answer is that you perceive that you deserve better than what you are getting. Learn to guide your emotions/ego, and you will be successful in everything, not just women.

Good luck.

 

[FortunateSon]

Why does it matter if they give you sh1tty behavior?

You don't have to answer me, but in most cases i think you'll find that the answer is that you perceive that you deserve better than what you are getting. Learn to guide your emotions/ego, and you will be successful in everything, not just women.

I see it as a sign of disrespect.

I don't take kindly to disrespect or cowardly acts of behaviour.

Now this is something I need to work on, maybe I take life too seriously and need to learn to not care?

If she does talk to me again, I'll speak to her as though nothing has happened.

I don't want to give her the satisfaction of annoying me.

 

[skinnyguy]

The fact that you posted about your annoyance with a girl who has low IL shows that you are defeated.

You can't be a DJ until these things don't faze you.

 

[nousername]

I see it as a sign of disrespect.

I don't take kindly to disrespect or cowardly acts of behaviour.

Now this is something I need to work on, maybe I take life too seriously and need to learn to not care?

If she does talk to me again, I'll speak to her as though nothing has happened.

I don't want to give her the satisfaction of annoying me.

The best way to look at things is that you should come across from a "teaching" sort of perspective. If you come across to a girl that you're trying to pick her up, she knows it, and so do you.

The thing is, her ego may try to fight you away, so first what you must do is learn to guide her ego, (another word for barrier), so that it doesn't conflict with yours.

But the catch is, is that if your own ego (emotional barrier) is preventing you from really opening up to her, you will get a clash of emotions, and it won't work. Think of it as how a concerned father tries to talk to his daughter about the repercussions of going out and fcking multiple guys.

The father really cares for his daughter, and doesn't want her to be hurt, but his EGO won't let himself accept the fact that she may be her own woman now and old enough to experience her own things, and they have an argument. (which is really just a clash of egos.)

The best thing he can do is TEACH her how to be proactive, not by talking but by doing. Actions. Inspire in a way that words cannot.

When you meet a new girl, no matter how "good-looking", have the perspective that you are just helping her out in her little journey. You're her knight in shining armour.

I guarantee you won't feel the same when the sh1tty behaviour happens because you realise it is just her "ego" doing it. She hasn't yet learnt to guide it, but YOU have, and that's why you're the DJ, and not her.

I know you understand because from your last post i can tell you're a good guy, willing to hear advice.

Remember, with great power comes great responsibility.

Use it wisely.

 

[FortunateSon]

Valid points.

I've taken your advice on board and hopefully will become a better person for it.

 

[nousername]

I'm glad to hear that

The turning point for me was when i realised that i was the actual problem and it all boiled down to me thinking i knew it all and was "too good" to learn any more. And once i thought that, i stopped growing.

If you're interested in continuing this mindset there are two great books you can read.

1. Don't Read This. Your Ego Won't Like It.

2. The 7 Habits Of Highly Successful People.

I'm not much of a reading person, so i listen to the second in audio format, but I'm telling you, this sh1t changes lives.

You will become magnetic with whatever you want, be it women, money, friends etc.

I wish you the best of luck.

 

[FortunateSon]

Thanks pal - but women are low on my priority list. I'm concentrating on my studies to further my career and make as much money as possible.

 

[RagingBalls]

I asked a girl out today and she said "yes",

Before i give an input First i wanna ask, Did a date happened?

 

[FortunateSon]

Before i give an input First i wanna ask, Did a date happened?

Nope, I asked her if she wanted to go out sometime, she said yes, but didn't appear interested at all and now is proceeding to ignore me.

But whatever, I've got over it after my little b*tchfest yesterday, that said Skinnyguy and nousername are right, I need to learn not to allow this stuff to get under my skin and react to it.

There's still plenty of work left to do if I'm to become a much better person and stop allowing other people to dictate my moods. I need to become the captain of my soul so to speak.

 

[Tictac]

Respect yourself first and always.

Everything else will take care of itself.

 

[RagingBalls]

Nope, I asked her if she wanted to go out sometime, she said yes, but didn't appear interested at all and now is proceeding to ignore me.

But whatever, I've got over it after my little b*tchfest yesterday, that said Skinnyguy and nousername are right, I need to learn not to allow this stuff to get under my skin and react to it.

There's still plenty of work left to do if I'm to become a much better person and stop allowing other people to dictate my moods. I need to become the captain of my soul so to speak.

I understand what you've been through. Just be cool about it, be yourself and in fairness to her, she might have reasons or personal problems that is not about you. I'm sure you asked her out in a nice way and there's no better way to handle that kind of situation than to give and respect her "space" to whatever she's having or dealing with. Respect is the key and that's a sign of being a true DJ

Just chill and act normal like life goes on for you both. I want you to still be still nice to her despite that. It shows your character as a man with good virtues as i'm sure you are.

you can still sleep at night with no burden of guilt, you just asked her out because you liked her and that's normal for a single guy. Her reactions is not your fault, although it's not what you expected to be, but that's a part of taking risk in asking someone out. You never know what you can get and that's part of the game. Cheers!

 

[FortunateSon]

Thanks Raging Bull, your input has been invaluable man, its business as usual for me.

 

[FortunateSon]

I read flashes of brilliance in your post about how rejection doesn't faze you. That's good! But I also sense frustration and anger toward women. I can relate to that.

IMO she wasn't ready to be asked out.

Doesn't mean you did anything wrong. But I also think she needed more conversation, etc. to open her up. These days, I'm much more patient and selective about number closing women. I'm pretty good about gauging interest levels. Sometimes I'll let them go without number closing if I feel they're not indicating a solid level of interest in me. I can let them go because I know there are tons of other women out there who I'll approach with success.

You don't have to respect them. But IMO it would serve you well to maintain a positive attitude about women in general. I've been consciously chasing women for going on 10 years now. It's more about pure enjoyment for me. It's about what they do FOR ME. I LIKE chasing women. It's like a chess game to me. I like the strategy and the games that come along with it. The rejections still come, but since I've been doing this for so long now, they're easier to deal with. Time and experience help.

Thanks for your reply. Yeah there's definitely some frustration and anger there, I just need to let it go, there's no point in generalizing all women based on the actions of the ones I've had dealings with.

I have to say since posting on this forum and getting feedback, I'm a lot more positive about the future, if I can adopt a care free attitude in the fullest and always remain in control of my own emotions, then I think I'll be in a much happier and healthier place.

 

[FortunateSon]

Just wait until one of em REALLY fvcks you up, haha. This is Childs play. Espi nailed it, its in your best interest to have a positive attitude towards women. Acknowledging reality about them actual fuels that, because it removes the value you place on women and turns serious business into carefree fluff.

It wasn't me placing value on this girl because she's not on a pedestal, nor do I have grandiose delusions of her being "the one". The reason I was annoyed wasn't that she's not interested, it is that I value honesty and if someone is dishonest I see it a sign of disrespect, but then do I have a right to be annoyed? This thread is teaching me that I don't and should I be annoyed about it? No, you guys are right, I shouldn't.

I'm still a work in progress and I'm still learning from trial and error, but slowly and surely I think I'm getting better and I'm confident that I can overcome my shortcomings.

I've decided just to be business as usual with this girl, I'll let it slide, there's no point acting buttsore about her reaction, if she wants to carry on ignoring me that's her choice, I wasn't planning on chasing her or pursuing her anymore and if she does talk to me, then that's cool.

Just gotta learn not to get annoyed in the first place.

 

[FortunateSon]

Thanks Danger.

I can usually tell when a girl likes me, they kinda make it pretty obvious, but with this girl I was getting mixed signals, sometimes it appeared as though she was and sometimes it appeared as though she wasn't, so I just bit the bullet and asked.

I'm feeling much more positive after reading the responses, so thanks once again.