Realizing you’ve lived in inauthentic life

[EverSure75]

Greetings all

I was sitting here trying to mentally sort through some family tension/drama that’s happening and realizing there’s a similar tension with a few acquaintances I have. People in my circle.

It just hit me that I’ve really been living an inauthentic life. I can’t think of any other way to word it.

I’ve left things unsaid. Let foolishness and silly reasoning from people close to me slide for the sake of not rocking the boat and I’ve ended up surrounded by people who I have very little in common with. Some I even despise.

It’s a weird feeling. It’s frightening because I’m at middle age and feel like I wish I could reset my life but at the same time I feel like I’m in that “ knowing is half the battle” place.

Anybody else ever had this realization?

Or is this just another sign of unplugging?

 

[EverSure75]

yep. youre just unplugging. its that uncomfortable in-between phase. everyone goes through it and theres a new guy posting their experience about once a month

youre letting go of all the old rules and books on life and adopting a new one. the real one. youve internalized red-pill truths (which are often/mostly ugly and tough to accept) and are now hyper sensitive to your surroundings

from here on out its just epiphany after epiphany until its all just second nature. you;ll be able to pierce reality with your open eyes with relative ease
welcome.....to the real world

Yeah. Understood. I guess I figured I’d have passed this stage already. I’ve been here for a few years now and thought I’d have been further ahead in my journey. I’ve definitely been guilty of slipping back into my old needy/seeking approval/not holding frame ways from time to time

Alas. Back on the saddle we go. Lol.
Thanks for the reminder.

 

[sosousage]

i wasted 3 yrs with 'fake' or totally 'unrelated' or 'different' friends. im still young but from now on i care more who i think of as friend or who i spend time with. time is valuable

 

[fastlife]

Except it wasn't 'Inauthentic'--You did exactly what was authentic to you, based on who you were and what you knew at the time.

The fact that you no longer resonate with those decisions doesn't mean they were 'bad'--just that you've grown, your model of the world has changed, and the person you are today would decide differently. But you can't re-decide the past; that was just part of the journey--and a necessary part of the journey--to get you where you are today.

So just accept it; forgive your past selves; and bask in the fact that you have complete control over what you decide TODAY, TOMORROW, & THE REST OF YOUR LIFE. Think of how powerful that is--and your access to that power is directly based on your experiences in the past, no matter how painful they were. Live it up, dude.

 

[guru1000]

Except it wasn't 'Inauthentic'--You did exactly what was authentic to you, based on who you were and what you knew at the time.

The fact that you no longer resonate with those decisions doesn't mean they were 'bad'--just that you've grown, your model of the world has changed, and the person you are today would decide differently. But you can't re-decide the past; that was just part of the journey--and a necessary part of the journey--to get you where you are today.

So just accept it; forgive your past selves; and bask in the fact that you have complete control over what you decide TODAY, TOMORROW, & THE REST OF YOUR LIFE. Think of how powerful that is--and your access to that power is directly based on your experiences in the past, no matter how painful they were. Live it up, dude.

Exactly. There are no mistakes. There are no misdeeds. There are no bad events. There are no failures. All alternate thinking models are flawed perceptions. One NEEDS to go through those valleys (and hopefully evolve, resultantly) to reach the peaks.

No bad can befall upon you.

 

[wifehunter]

 

[EverSure75]

Thanks for the perspective, gentlemen. Salute.

 

[stovepipe]

I can relate. It wasn't till after my toxic relationship and learning so much about myself that i realized how many toxic people I had in my life. Part of it was due to my codependency and the rest was my own fault. I mustered up the courage to remove all of them from my life I was left with almost no one. The loneliness eats at me some days. But in the end I am proud of myself for finally taking action. The downside is a couple were my own family. I have to see them almost daily which some days is really awkward. Using this time to better myself, educate myself more, change my entire flawed perception I had of life and become the healthiest version of me I have ever been.

 

[Chev.Chelios]

Haha I'm in the same chit. it's amazing, though I feel like Im turning coocoo crazy.
Reading about social conditioning, religous history.. sex at dawn and watching juliens transformation mastery the effects are taking place. dropping ones ego and questioning everything about your tiny little reality.

their is no god. (not the one society tells you about anyway.) and he isn't going to save or do a damn thing for you.

society is built purely on scarcity and everything in society is geared towards that.

familys, homes, schooling, is again, built on pure scarcity meant to make you into a robot.

mother father households are bullchit.

society is 95% beta males for a reason

marriage and relationships are only really for economic purposes.

heartbreak and depression are only effects of your beliefs and upbringing + societal pressure which I've found out is a LETHAL force against individuals. (shaming, judgement, disowning)

becoming a pimp requires shedding everything you've learned and coming back to your core, which takes time


pyshcopaths and guys with mental disorders are already naturaly good with social skills because their minds arnt sustainable to the condition in their upbringing to a degree, explains why all my natural friends were so damn good while I sucked bawls growing up.

so ask yourself, if you were born a phychopath, how good would you be with game? having no shame, fear, empathy for others? my guess you wouldn't even need this forum.

good days ahead

 

[EverSure75]

Haha I'm in the same chit. it's amazing, though I feel like Im turning coocoo crazy.
Reading about social conditioning, religous history.. sex at dawn and watching juliens transformation mastery the effects are taking place. dropping ones ego and questioning everything about your tiny little reality.

their is no god. (not the one society tells you about anyway.) and he isn't going to save or do a damn thing for you.

society is built purely on scarcity and everything in society is geared towards that.

familys, homes, schooling, is again, built on pure scarcity meant to make you into a robot.

mother father households are bullchit.

society is 95% beta males for a reason

marriage and relationships are only really for economic purposes.

heartbreak and depression are only effects of your beliefs and upbringing + societal pressure which I've found out is a LETHAL force against individuals. (shaming, judgement, disowning)

becoming a pimp requires shedding everything you've learned and coming back to your core, which takes time


pyshcopaths and guys with mental disorders are already naturaly good with social skills because their minds arnt sustainable to the condition in their upbringing to a degree, explains why all my natural friends were so damn good while I sucked bawls growing up.

so ask yourself, if you were born a phychopath, how good would you be with game? having no shame, fear, empathy for others? my guess you wouldn't even need this forum.

good days ahead

Wouldn’t say I’m with you on everything you typed here. I still believe in many things I always have. The difference is that I’ve examined these beliefs and still hold them because I see where they work for me and the kind of life I want...not because I’ve been spoon fed them and just moving on autopilot.

Every man’s journey is different but we all have to shed our old conditioning and start living life on our own terms. Best to you on yours my brother.

 

[Dingo]

Welcome to the club....

I feel the same way at times... lots and lots of regrets.

 

[Bible_Belt]

Tomorrow is your chance to change everything. All of us have a limited number of tomorrows. Make the most of yours.

 

[logicallefty]

Right there with you OP. I have been through that exact transformation. When people are used to you being the slightly submissive one in your interactions with them, and then you change and no longer are, most of them won’t be able to handle it. You will lose friends and family u have been close to for a very long time but also gain some new friends that are better friends than what you had before. But the ones you lost you only lost because you stop doing things on their terms and they don’t respect you enough to do things on your terms or even find a middle ground. To me that’s no real loss when you are a man who respects yourself. Good riddance.

 

[greatsnake]

it's an interesting situation to be in given that you've been programmed to be a certain way and your change is making people around you uncomfortable.

The reality is that when your mind changes, your world changes.