Reality Check..Help PLEASE

SlyD4rK

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Read all the way through please

Overview:...I'm Josh..i'm currently a junior at my school and i want to be a photographer...so i have a REALLY laid-back schedule: US History, Biology, ADv. Photo, English, Yearbook (im the photo editor) so i am intent on having as much social interaction as possible and to have the funnest last to years of my hishchool career

ok, here is my story..

Last Summer i went on a trip to Europe. it wasnt really fun...but that isn't the point. B4 i went back to my mom's house, i stayed at my dad's house for a week. that is when i discoverd this website. I was like wow...this is SO awesome. so ever since then i have become a RAFC. the rest of summer i am gradually becoming more ****y and such, basically becoming a DJ. Well, school starts, and nothing really happens....just the same ole same ole stuff, but i had just recieved DoubleYourDating by DAvid. D....so i started getting REALLY ****y..and i started giving **** to everyone that i talked to...(when i was only trying to be funny) well as time goes on..i read Weapons of Mass Seduction By MR. Fingers. so i become EVEN MORE ****y...of course i am on top of my game as far as girls go (dating 2 girls at once) but i continue to drift away from my orginal group of friends. my confidence was off the charts and i was always happy, but for some reason...my friends didnt really want to talk to me that much...Yesterday...my 2 best friends confront me. they tell me how i have 'changed' since i got back from Europe and such. they tell me that i have been really mean to certain people lately, then tell me that i need to get my priorities straight and i need to figure out what i want to do with my life. asking where the 'goofy Josh' went..they tell me that i need to stop focusing on girls so much and more on other things....

so i go to school today and for the first time since my sophmore year, i am doubting myself, doubting my abilities to associate with people, doubting everything....i walked with my head down today, never really held a good conversation, and just had a crappy day...(i think i laughed maybe 5 times all day) .............Almost nobody asked me what was wrong....they all seemed disinterested in me. i felt like all my friends were slipping away...i was scared....scared i would lose all my friends...totally lost my mindset of being a DJ....did i go on about it wrong?...was i too ****y? What Happened?

i have been having a few AIM conversations with my friends and they kinda go like:

Me: have i been acting wierd lately?
XYZ: dont take this wrong but...you have been acting all ****y and you act like your the ****...you brag, you have been increasingly rude to everyone in the group and....your just MEAN....ever since you came back from Europe..im not trying to condemn you, i am just telling you how it is....

any thoughts would be much appreciated..


EDIT well....upon ALL of that crap that happened yesterday....more crap happened today and after school yesterday.....

you remeber how i said i was dating 2 girls? well girl #1 found out on Monday...but was waiting untill the right moment to bring it all down upon me...so now ALL of my friends have a scapegoat, and now i cant even hang out with them anymore...tomorrow i face the Dilemma of talking to everyone about what has happened....and then taking all the ****. or i could be a coward and hang out with different people like i did today...
 
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oakraiderz2

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Dont stop what you were doing. Your friends are just jealous of you and what youve become. Why would they be mad that youre getting girls?? If you were happy, liked how you were acting and what you were doing why would you change that? Until they take the step that you did yall probably wont be friends since jealousy will get in the way. Ive NEVER heard anyone i know tell anyone else to stop focusing on girls. Try to help them out, if it doesnt work dont give up what youve gained because they dont like the fact that youve changed. Its not like youve changed in a bad way, so dont worry about it. If they dont like the new happy, confident you, gotta find some more friends. Ask them whats wrong with what youre doing and tell them about girls or something, i dunno. Good luck.
 

NYC Dude

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The change from AFC to DJ requires change throughout your entire lifestyle, friends included. If you're becoming more successful with women because of the ****y+funny act, then you must choose whether you want to progress and get the girls, or stay secure in what you've done forever, staying with your friends. Personally, I'd take progress over security, but it is up to you.
 

SlyD4rK

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thanks...i appreciate the replys...

I'm going to tell some of my closer friends what is going on and tell them that i like being happy and confident and whatnot. and ima take your advice oak about saying that i like being this way.
 

08aisaac

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I totally lost all my friends, and stuff, but it depends, because no one can ever truly be happy, 100% of the time.

But friends are great, chicks are great, LTR's are great, eevrythign is great. I have had a few of those days, but even though I read Weapons of Mass Seduction fifty hundred times, I try to apply methods to incorporate into my own game, and I haev my own style, unique to me.

You can use what you already know, and start developing your own style. I kept my basic personality, and just changed it and tweaked it a bit, and now I am the pimp master of the universe, and easily make friends with who ever I want.

Make your own style.
 

Porky

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Originally posted by NYC Dude
The change from AFC to DJ requires change throughout your entire lifestyle, friends included. If you're becoming more successful with women because of the ****y+funny act, then you must choose whether you want to progress and get the girls, or stay secure in what you've done forever, staying with your friends. Personally, I'd take progress over security, but it is up to you.
It's possible to do that without becoming a huge douche.
 

sheepdog

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i think whats happening is that you have a little too much ****y and not enough funny, remember to pair your ****y statements with funny ones because arrogance by itself can be a huge turnoff for girls, the bragging and such expresses all kinds of insecurities, this is my guess why you said the girls were disinterested, as i learned from David D. you might be experiencing "hubris" or over confidence, which people hate and begin to want you to fail, and fail very hard, you dont need to be a **** to your friends because they arent as good with women, talk with them like they said above, ask if they want help although do not revert to your old afc self because of them
 

AC/DC

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I had the same issue.

Basically, you need a balance between nice guy and terrible guy. Perfect balance.

Based on Aristotle's Golden Mean: Everything In Moderation:

Balance between physical and mental activity.

Courage: too much is stupidity, not enough is cowardice. YOu need a medium amount.

Eating: too much is obesity, not enough is unhealthy.

Be whoever you want. People say you've changed... so what? That's a good thing. I just tell anyone who asks "I grew up".
 

AB500

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If I were you I would evaluate yourself, if your really overdoing the ****y then definately fix that. I outgrew my old group of friends when I started becoming a DJ. Its ironic because before I almost looked up to them and thought they were some pretty cool cats but now I'm so much higher up on the social laddar that I look down and see them just as AFCs. Go and find some new friends that are as ****y and funny as you are (or close).
 

toddC

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I think you should tell your friend what your trying to accomplish..tell them ****y works around girls and thats how u've been pimping them...btw....where can i get ANY david stuff for free?
 

Just because a woman listens to you and acts interested in what you say doesn't mean she really is. She might just be acting polite, while silently wishing that the date would hurry up and end, or that you would go away... and never come back.

Quote taken from The SoSuave Guide to Women and Dating, which you can read for FREE.

SlyD4rK

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well....upon ALL of that crap that happened yesterday....more crap happened today and after school yesterday.....

you remeber how i said i was dating 2 girls? well girl #1 found out on Monday...but was waiting untill the right moment to bring it all down upon me...so now ALL of my friends have a scapegoat, and now i cant even hang out with them anymore...tomorrow i face the Dilemma of talking to everyone about what has happened....and then taking all the ****. or i could be a coward and hang out with different people like i did today...
 

NYC Dude

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What do you mean by "scapegoat" in your situation? If your friends are going to be mad and come down on you because you were dating more than one girl, rather than joking around with you because you got caught, those are not the friends to have.
 

SlyD4rK

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yeah that is true....but i dont think they want to grasp the fact that i was getting more girls then them...i think they were afraid of me changing from someone i didnt want to be into someone i wanted to be. maybe they were jealous...maybe they were afraid of change...im not sure, but im going to find out tomorrow

and NYC dude...the girl was part of the group, so i hurt some feelings..

but then again....i wasnt REALLY cheating on her....i mean...i actually TOLD her that she had competition...maybe she didnt think i was serious
 

sheepdog

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.btw....where can i get ANY david stuff for free? [/B]
I've been dealing with that question since i was twelve, but the best place to get them is off a bittorrent site like www.demonoid.com get a bittorrent client and register, send me a pm if the registrations are closed and i can send you an invite
 

SlyD4rK

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well...the girl that found out...refuses to talk to me...and i dont want to come off AFC by pursuing her...so i just left it at that...and i ended up NOT talking to my friends because i didnt talk to girl#1

bloody hell..
 

It doesn't matter how good-looking you are, how romantic you are, how funny you are... or anything else. If she doesn't have something INVESTED in you and the relationship, preferably quite a LOT invested, she'll dump you, without even the slightest hesitation, as soon as someone a little more "interesting" comes along.

Quote taken from The SoSuave Guide to Women and Dating, which you can read for FREE.

RaWBLooD

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".my 2 best friends confront me. they tell me how i have 'changed' since i got back from Europe and such. they tell me that i have been really mean to certain people lately, then tell me that i need to get my priorities straight and i need to figure out what i want to do with my life. asking where the 'goofy Josh' went..they tell me that i need to stop focusing on girls so much and more on other things...."

friends change
i see envy in those words from them.:woo:
 

DJ4Real

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Sly, you know girls are complicated. Dating 2 at once is trouble. lol.
 
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Brian20o2

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wow, you must have changed dramticallly fast. ive changed alot but slowly and gradually none of my friends complain and acctually seem to like me more, it just gets better. still single but much more outgoing and social. now if i have noone to chill with i take it as a challenge and chill with people i dont know well. where as the old me would just sit and mope about being alone and not having friends.. life just gets better
 

AustinG

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they are jelous....one time on a cruise i was with this one hb9 while this other girl i never spoke a word to told me she hated me becuase i thought i was the **** considering i never spoke a word to her once..but after the cruise she told me she hated me on the cruise becuase of that but not she likes me so she said haha
 
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