Ready to hang the game up.

DanelMadr

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cordoncordon said:
And I'm just throwing this out there, but...have you ever thought maybe you were gay? That maybe this deep hidden urge that you keep inside of you that you keep repressed is the reason you are so sad and alone all the time? Because you know you are not being true to yourself?? You like being with your male friends, and you hate the touch of a woman. That to me....is being gay.
Hmm, that's interesting you mentioned it. Maybe your subconsciousness wants to come out of closet, so you suggested that for him:nervous:

'...and now suck my dlck...juuust kidding'

You can be right about the depression thing though. Mild depression can wear you out. So just don't think too much, Squirrels. And if you have to take drugs, take Fvckitall.

Hold on.
 

squirrels

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cordoncordon said:
And I'm just throwing this out there, but...have you ever thought maybe you were gay? That maybe this deep hidden urge that you keep inside of you and that you keep repressed is the reason you are so sad and alone all the time? Because you know you are not being true to yourself?? You like being with your male friends, and you hate the touch of a woman. That to me....is being gay.
LOL...nah, not gay. The ubiquitous "they" say that no one is 100% "straight", and I can probably accept that, but no, you read me wrong.

I do enjoy the "touch of a woman". The problem is I am disappointed in myself for having those desires. I've hurt a lot of women by f**king them without emotional connection. Sexually, I am totally into them, but after I nut, I just want to get as far away from them as possible. The metaphor I was using earlier was comparing it to a "drug"...after f**king a girl, when I'm laying with her in her bed, I feel like an druggie sitting there high out of his mind in a crackhouse or opium den, and I just have this "moment of clarity" where I feel like I deserve BETTER than this, what these drives are leading me toward.

Last night I was ready to just put it all aside, I hated myself for getting "sucked in" so easily. This morning, I've been walking around with a half-chubby all day, eyeing women up in the elevators at work...and I hate myself for it.

Women have always made sh*tty friends for me, though. They're fun to hang out with for their own reasons, but the brutal attitude I take with myself and the constant desire to be more than "normal" makes women ineffective companions for all but sex.

It's not that I don't HAVE the feelings...it's more that I don't WANT them. I don't want to be a slave to the weaker emotions like "love", "lust", etc...like everyone else in this world.

As I said to another member in PM: This is the ultimate goal for some people? To the point where we have forums dedicated to getting guys laid?? Or even married/"related"?? What are we doing, man? What is SoSuave doing??

Are we selling each other out to the system by teaching strategies for romance and sex? Are we "part of the problem" here on this forum, in that by teaching men how to be men, we unconsciously are enslaving them to their sexuality?

I'm the only person I know who is dissatisfied with the inherent limitations of being human. "Sex" has become one of those limitations. I don't know if I CAN shut it out, though. I'm weak. :( Like masochistic Christian zealots who flogged themselves during the inquisition out of disgust for their human nature.

Am I "depressed"? You're not the first person to suggest that. But although I find nothing worth living for in life, it's not some random depression. The cognition leading to that feeling is there. Why should I be happy? I'm human. I can't even rise above the desire to stick my d!ck in a girl. What is there to "aspire to" that matters?

You may be able to make me happy with meds or some clever brainwashing, but will it change the fact that I'm still just another swinging d!ck? P***y led to the downfall of some of the greatest empires in the world. Has f**king or romance or love ever done SH*T good for mankind? Is anyone here a better person as a result of it?
 

cordoncordon

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I want you to really think about if you are gay or not. Don't just brush it off because of society. Really look at that and if it could be possible.

And if not...I really think you are depressed because you are overanalyzing things, and thinking there is more to life than there really is. We are no different than an ant, a fly, a bear, a horse. We were born to do one thing. Procreate and further the species. That has been the way of evolution for hundreds of millions of years. Without sex, the human race dies. Through evolution sex has developed into a very pleasurable thing. But when it comes down to it, sex is just an exchange of bodily fluids so that our species can continue on.

I have often said that life is basically an existence of just "getting by". just surviving and doing the daily necessary things needed to live. Interspersed with all of that are things we look forward to and enjoy. Things like a vacation. A night out with friends. A concert. Buying a new car. A new house. Whatever things make you happy. And we get up emotionally and look forward to those things and it keeps us going...it gives us a sense that there is enjoyment out there. And then, after the vacation is over or the concert is done or you have lived in your new house for a while, reality sets in and you realize that life is back to its typical boring existence...until the next thing pops up that we can look forward to and get excited about.

When you go in with that kind of thinking, you can't really ever be disappointed by people or by life because you accept it for what it is. I think you would be helped by some anti-depressants to lift the fog that you are in, perhaps some kind of sexual stimulant, and stop THINKING so much. Stop thinking there is more to life than what there is. Life is too short. Accept your happy moments for what they are, live day by day, and let this self-doubt you have about yourself go.
 

ChumpNoMore

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We all go through highs and lows with respect to interest in women, health, stress, her attitude, etc all effect it. However your continual lack of interest leads me to beleive there may be a physical (low T) or mental (depression) aspect to it. No harm in getting a once over, physically and mentally.
 

DanelMadr

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Squirells,

I thought it over...a little bit :)....and here is the best advice I can give you:

Read your post like it was someone's you really like (important). And try to give him an advice. Totally detached, sincere advice.

I will certainly do that for myself.

We clearly have no power and/or knowledge to advice you any better (besides of hitting on you with 'Aren't you gay' questions (don't get too mad cordoncordon, gay jokes are simply too tempting....No I am not gay in denial because of it....OK I stop it now)). I believe it is every man's destiny to sort out his own after all.

In the darkest hours what held my head above water was curiosity (even if everything goes to hell I am at least curious how it will end) and I am strong believer in carrying your load to the end (OK stop giggling). Just don't die without fighting. And I don't mean a killing spree (notice for lurkers not you Squirrels).
 

Slickster

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The reason you're not into sex is because you have zero feelings for the women you are banging. It's as simple as that. Sure screwing random women is fun for awhile but it gets old eventually. Hard to believe for some but it's true. Find someone you have an amazing connection with and the sex will be just as good. Funny how that works.

According to you, you have no desire to be sucked into the "love" or "relationship" trap that society imposes on everyone. Sorry squirrels it's not society. It's fvcking nature! It's natural to have relationships, connections, lust, and yes feel love.
These aren't "weak" emotions or things. They are strength defined! If that makes any sense.

Something that always bugs me about your posts squirrels. You think the whole world is fvcked up and unhappy? Or people are just pretending to be happy. You have this attitude that you are different (maybe smarter) than everyone else. Hence statements like "anything less than legendary just isn't worth it." Then you have the audacity to look down on those that "are" happy and "stuck" in these "prisons" of society. Time to face the facts man, you are just like everyone else. You claim you don't want to "feel" much of anything. I think it's BS. Your posts scream to me that you are desperate for some sort of meaningful connection with someone or something. You can buck the trend all you want but it seems to be getting you no where. Isn't that what happens when you oppose nature?

Squirrels, you and I came to this site around the same time years ago. I've watched you evolve from a positive upbeat guy into what you are now. You ever think that hanging around this place is what is causing your problems? All the negativity about women, relationships, etc. You spend a lot of time here. People don't find sosuave when their life is good and they are happy. They come here with problems. In many ways it's not a very positive place at all. Especially if you are looking to see negativity in everything. For a guy like you in your headspace its probably the last place you should be spending time.

Squirrels I don't mean to come off as harsh. You have been a friend for a long time. I've told you several times before. Hop on an airplane. Get some perspective dude. It's a huge world that you have to experience before you start giving up on anything. You can't just read about it. Life is too short to be unhappy. DO SOMETHING ABOUT IT. Change your locale, your career, friends, whatever.... You are in a BIG rut buddy. Time to get out. What you are doing now obviously isn't working. To continue on this path is the definition of insanity.

Don't complain if you aren't trying to improve your situation.
 
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5string

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Not long ago, I was really down on everything. So much so that I was actually hospitalized briefly. Now I had always considered myself to have it together with a very direct type a personality but, these moments in life happen to nearly everyone at some juncture.

My small piece of advice is to do what I did when I was in a rut. I got with my friends and talked to them about what I was going through. They understood for the most part and supported me. People care more than you know, and it really shines through when you reach out to them in a time of true need. They helped pull me out of the rabbit hole. squirrels, maybe get with your buddies and talk it out with them?
 

DangNammit

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Without a doubt it sounds like you are depressed... I've on and off my whole life and you sound depressed. It happens to a lot of us.

Some of the last few posts here have been great. You really should look into it. No pill is gonna change you, depression unchecked will.

It truly is the small pleasures in life you must seek out. Its too tough on a person to always shoot for glory.

I've had my a55 kicked in by women left and right over the last few years... I'm finally understanding that there is more to life than this dance. Find what it is for you (and give me a hint cuz I'm still looking myself).

Gotta keep on man... but if sleeping with random nobodys ain't doing it for ya, stop doing it. Its natural for people to make life out to be so important, but when it comes down to it, it birth, school, work, death. You give life its meaning, its not the other way around.

Hang in there.
 

Solomon

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First off, I have tremendous respect for Squirrels, and his contribution to the site and NLG (RIP) however having studied Squirrels post for two years now. I realized that Squirrels is in a deep depression? how do I know? cause I'm in a semi-depression myself. When your depressed your sex drive takes a nose dive which means you could careless about women. The thing about Squirrels though is that he has been depressed for a long, long ass time.

I don't think Squirrels is gay, I just think he wants to find a woman who would challenge him not game-wise but intellectually. A woman who he deems worthy of his time, the problem is, Squirrels is a lazy ass seducer, how do you expect to find this women when your always whining about her?

Just my thoughts IMO, I guarantee you that if Squirrels met a woman who intrigued him intellectually(among other things) and takes care of this depression shyt, he would be on point.

romangod said:
squirrels: You're actually one of the smart ones. Your cynicism is not unfounded. Modern love and relationships are a minefield for today's man. All the cards are stacked against a man and if he errs it is a lifelong sentence of financial and emotional hardship.

We have legislated against being a man and are forced to walk a fine line between being a stud and a stalker. The woman will decide which one we are. Either one brings its own troubles.

The sexual revolution opened up Pandora's box for both men and women. It changed the game. Sluts and women of low character became desirable while modest women with integrity and self respect were shunned. Their moist, warm hole became dominant and began to rule the psyche of many men. They had to have it and women soon realized this.

The price of pu$$y went up while the quality went down. It's estimated that 25% of women at 25 are carrying some form of STD. They were raised to play by the new rules. The new rules could kill them and their unwitting victims.


Heaven help the guy that knocks up a brief fling and she decides to keep it. It's a life sentence with no parole. That 15 minutes of sexual release and ego boosting could cause a lifetime of financial and psychological torture. The only hope would be that the mother shows mercy to the now trapped sperm donor.

I'm trying not to be too cynical. There are some women that get it and haven't bit the apple. But they are rare indeed. Most have unconsciously bought into the new paradigm.

Just make sure you're not the guy at the Wal Mart with a fat bimbo in stretch pants and a few screaming kids paying for a shopping cart full of junk. All the while knowing that she can ruin your life on a whim. Ouch!


Cheers!
romangod, this post is profound, you sir have hit the nail on the head, this is something I'm just realizing after two years of chasing tail left and right. The reason why the MM section clamors for the "quality" woman is because after hitting up the bars/clubs/hell and even malls, we realize that there is more then bending a chick over like Vince in entourage and nailing her after knowing her for only an hour.

One of the solutions would be for us to follow the mantra of the Traders and Guru's and Pook's and look for women with high moral altitude,woman who show interest through their action and woman of the spirit i.e. woman aren't superficial but value Godly things

Just my 02.cents
 

It doesn't matter how good-looking you are, how romantic you are, how funny you are... or anything else. If she doesn't have something INVESTED in you and the relationship, preferably quite a LOT invested, she'll dump you, without even the slightest hesitation, as soon as someone a little more "interesting" comes along.

Quote taken from The SoSuave Guide to Women and Dating, which you can read for FREE.

Maxtro

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How interesting, being depressed and having low libido and not enjoying sex.

It's basically the opposite of me. I'm clinically depressed but have a super high sex drive. It drives me insane that I can't get any. When I eventually get laid (through my abnormal ways), I'm high for a week. You're also able to get women while not being happy, which just blows my mind.

Anyways, have you considered getting some counseling to find out what is happening?
 

Mr.Positive

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Squirrels, you need a vacation from yourself. :D

I mean that, in all honesty, because I can understand. I've mentioned this to you before, and I'll mention it again...join your local fire department!

Here's the thing, you may be sitting around the fire house having the same discussion with your firefighting buddies...then the alarm rings.

Everything changes, instantly. Convos dropped, food dropped, everyone on a mission. You haul ass down to the engine, don your gear, and go tearing out the fire house balls to the walls.

That call is one vacation. You come back a refreshed man. You've escaped yourself completely, and it's a damn great feeling to be able to do that when very few people actually know what that is like.

People like you, squirrels, and me to some extent, need to have something in life that allows us to escape ourselves. We both have risk taking personalities...and unless we balance that, we will always be unbalanced and 'unfulfilled' and lacking enjoyment in what most folks should fine enjoyable.

Understand yourself, and accept yourself.
 

ken chang

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This is a very honest post and I really enjoyed reading it. I'm kinda' new here so I'm really not that ready to post as honestly as this.

As for "hoping someone can talk you out of it". I doubt that you'll find much. You'll get a lot of men agreeing and relating with you, though. Including myself.
 

DanelMadr

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Reading this thread I think it is a time to realize that you are actually a depressed homosexual :eek:

Besides my excellent advice, I think the vacation and taking a break from your routine (work and life) can be good too. Burn out can be dangerous especially when your personal life and your job are extremely unsatisfying.
 

Atom Smasher

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Squirrels,

It sounds like you might have an ambient self-loathing, which takes the form of loathing the "human condition". Sometimes that can manifest as pseudo-pride, as if "I'm above this". But the actual cause can be that self-loathing.

It also sounds like you might suffer from a certain toxic SHAME about sex. Is that possible? Can you look back and find a time when you were shamed about sex during your formative years? That might give you some insight.

Finally, I'm wondering... Are you addicted to porn or to masturbation? I have come to the conclusion that porn erodes a man's character horribly. I have finally cut it all out because I've been damaged by it.

Just some thoughts to ponder. I'm just trying to help you ask those questions to yourself, because I see them as possibilites at least.
 

Create self-fulfilling prophecies. Always assume the positive. Assume she likes you. Assume she wants to talk to you. Assume she wants to go out with you. When you think positive, positive things happen.

Quote taken from The SoSuave Guide to Women and Dating, which you can read for FREE.

BuckeyeBrigadier

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I can definitely relate to squirrels, especially this part: "This is the ultimate goal for some people?"

I think it's the shock of realizing just how unimportant sex and dating ultimately is to our lives that got to squirrels yet it's a need that'll always be there until you die.
 

Razor Sharp

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You have so many problems I don't even know where to start

1. Low libido = bad health (physical/mental) for a man. Period. Nutrition & exercise are always the deciding factors.
2. It's foolish to treat sex as a goal - what you should be looking for is a real connection, one that will carry through the intimacy and make for great sex
3. It's even more foolish to seek ONS with low-quality chicks, and expect anything other than emptiness afterwards

With that said, plenty of great people abstained from sex, Nikola Tesla, Ghandi, etc. But unless you are going to usher in a new industrial age, bring peace/freedom to your nation, or join a clergy, then this is a poor choice and IMHO you are just basking in your own misery.

My impression is that you've steeped yourself for so long in the community that you are sporting SoSuave goggles all the time, letting your choices/preferences be influenced by a majority of horny youngsters who just want to check in their V card, or get a special girl to notice them.

Seriously, you should be way past this juvenile crap. It's like you don;t even learn from your own experiences. You remind me of the left-back kid in my 5th grade. Dude was like 14 and had facial hair - everyone made fun of him, and rightly so because he wasn't retarded or "special", he was just a lazy dumbass.

Look, I'm trying real hard to feel sorry for you here, but I'm just not buying this "call for help". Especially when pretty much every other post you make is just that. I don't even need to read your words anymore because its always the same:

"Guys I feel really isolated and disconnected. Women are a huge waste of time (which isn't even valuable to me) Now if you'll excuse me I'm gonna watch some Grey's Anatomy, then have some ice cream and cry a whole lot."

Hmm this pattern looks familiar.

> Complaining without actually seeking solutions
> Feeling like a leaf at the mercy of life's storms
> Having meaningless sex out of obligation

Looks like it's time to call Dr. House, for here we have a man who thinks he's a woman.

Here's a challenge for you. Go get a blood test and have them examine your testosterone levels. I'm willing to bet that they are low enough to raise more than one eyebrow.

You want some insight as to why you feel isolated?

I never met you, but in real life I'd probably talk to you for about 5 minutes before seeing that sad little raincloud you conjured up over your own head. Who the hell wants to relate to that? I sure as hell don't. While you are busy stewing in your misery I've left you behind and started talking to girls who are so fine, you'd feel guilty and undeserving for even getting their number.

The real question here is not how you can change, but how badly you want to. There are simple steps you can take

> Better diet (research testosterone boosting foods)
> Exercise
> Talk therapy with a psychiatrist (no drugs!)
> Change of scenery - roadtrip
> New hobby/sport/job
> Deep inner game work so you realize what you are worthy of

If you really wanted to change your life you would. It's actually the easiest thing in the world to switch things up, move to a different place, take up a new career, or whatever. The real challenge is in letting go of that misery & suffering which you've grown so accustomed to, that it feels like home.

Sh*t or get off the f*cking pot, squirrels.

If you are gonna be done with the game, then be a man of your word and be done with it. Join a monastery, become a frisbee champion, or donate your balls to some charitable organization. The last thing you should be doing is coming here to complain about it to us - over and over and over.

That just shows a great deal of inner conflict. Despite your justifications for dropping out, you know in the pit of your soul that you are not walking your path. You are at odds with your own nature, and no amount of haggling with online personalities will settle that score.
 

Kailex

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I'll agree with Razor Sharp on a lot of his points and some of the other posters as well, but I think to best bring out THIS particular situation, I'll use a Superman analogy.

Superman has essentially (in the most basic of forms) three "visions".
He has the normal vision, X-Ray vision, and then THE X-Ray vision.

The normal vision: Sees the world for what it is, takes it at face value and believes that the world is simply what you see on the exterior. You see that woman you like and you love how she looks. She looks great in that dress and you are sure that her inner virtues are as beautiful as her outer virtues. Ah, the joys of being ignorant and naive.

X-Ray Vision: The one we all want. We want to see underneath that dress. Just see her nude with that X-Ray Vision. To undress her without really undressing her. You'd get to see every detail of that glorious body of hers. You still think that her inner virtues MIGHT match her outer virtues, but there's always that seed of doubt. But hey, you got to see her for who she "is" better than the normal vision.

THE X-Ray Vision: The one some of us eventually develop. Your eyes got wonky and now you don't see the naked her anymore. All you see is muscle and bones. You see the complete infrastructure to women and once you've seen it, you can't unsee it. You don't see the exterior anymore, anytime you look at a woman, you only see her for what she is or what she most likely is on the inside. You begin to despise this gift because you can no longer appreciate the exterior and the mysticism of the interior. You have the essential blueprint to every woman at the palms of your hands and you realize that all of this is just a vicious cycle.


For those of us not looking to settle yet, it IS a cycle.
Meet, go out, exchange pleasantries, body fluids, eventually cut off...
Meet someone else, go out, exchange pleasantries, body fluids, eventually cut off...

Then we are told to spin plates. So we are repeating this procedure endlessly, sometimes 2 or 3 at a time.

Spinning plates is ESSENTIAL. It's what keeps us grounded, but also what accelerates the process that leads to THE X-Ray vision.

Go out with enough women, and you begin to see a pattern to all of them... whether she's a 6 or a 9, whether she works at Chucky Cheese or is a doctor.

The point is... enjoy the company, despite whatever vision you might have at this point in time. That's why this forum advocates self-improvement over all else. Becoming a better man lasts forever, a woman's company is always only temporary.
 

Die Hard

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The clichés in psychology are true. Everybody mocks them because they don't WANT them to be true (too painful), but they ARE true.

I've found that most serious psyhological issues basically really come down to: mommy/daddy didn't love you enough.

Think I'm full of bull**** or that this does not apply to you? Okay, I dare you... Go back to your youth, think over the relationship with both of your parents. What parts did you like, what parts didn't you like? As soon as you remember bad things, you'll try to skip thinking about them, coz they make you feel uncomfortable. Be honest with me, no..be honest with yourself, and tell me you didn't encounter such thoughts. I dare you...

Now... You wanna be a man? Wanna cure yourself, your psychological issues, your existential crisis etc.? Then stick with those thoughts and see the process through. Most people can't, they're pussies, they'll never be real men and they'll never reach self actualization. So what are you, Squirrels? Pu$$y or man?

Good luck.


Apart from that..Cheer up! Watch this: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=SCiGGubKvzo&feature=related

You remind me of Rocky when he goes training with Apollo but trains like a half a$$. No faith, no confidence, empty inside. http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=XlbKn8_p3vk

You got a lot of pain inside, it's the base of all your problems. But you buried the pain deep, like it's not there. It's time to face it after all, coz it will always be there and keep undermining you. Till you face it and conquer it, and find that 'eye of the tiger' http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=JjeeMww_vhk&feature=player_embedded
 
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Annapolis Sailor

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synergy1 said:
In the past year I have: lost my job, lost my last gf, failed a business venture, lost all my processions, am still unemployed in the worst recession since the 80s, am losing my life savings (thank god I had some!!), got my laptop stolen, but am still relatively happy ( okay, the prospect of going broke sucks). Actually ,I am pulling some mad game right now because I keep that fresh outlook on life. Why? This **** doesn't matter. I could find 10000 reasons why life sucks, but I prefer to find the 1 or 2 reasons why life is good.
Hey, synergy1. I like your attitude. I am just curious about one thing if you do not mind answering it would be helpful in my understanding. Did you former gf leave because losing your job? This question had a lot to do with men and their perceived value. It goes something like this and may sound familiar to a lot of men:

GF: I will stay with you no matter what happens. I love you....
(1 month later)
BF: I lost my job today. Big layoff.
GF: What??!!!! No..... Well, uhm... I am outta here!

Hah!
 

Do not be too easy. If you are too easy to get, she will not want you. If you are too easy to keep, she will lose interest in you. If you are too easy to control, she will not respect you.

Quote taken from The SoSuave Guide to Women and Dating, which you can read for FREE.

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