reacting to disrespect

*******

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Im messing with this girl for a couple months. We are not in a relationship because i chose not to be in one. She agreed to meet me in school to mess around, and did. The only thing is that she left me for no reason and went to class with out a word. this is unacceptable. How should i react? Im only asking because i feel like there's something i could do that im missing. Let me know, what would you do? after all, i can't let it slide.
 

milrenkb

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I'm glad you made this post. Doing this shows me that while you look like your on the verge of loosing your cool you still have the ability to restrain yourself.

Look the fact of the matter is that if your going to take the not looking for a relationship angle than your going to have to accept the risk that come with it. Personally I enjoy dating multiple women as much as the next guy.

As for how you should react. Well in reality you shouldn't. Look guys who are always busy protecting their ego are the ones who are always getting in fights. Ironically that makes us less civil than animals, because most of them only engage in physical confrinations when their safteys in jepordy. When you say you've been disrespected and you should do something about it your setting yourself up to look like a idiot, all due respect.

Look guys who are sure of themselves don't let others affect how they think of themselves without a very good reason. So unless someone has a suggestion that you can use to better yourself foget aboud it.

This could very well be a either a test or a cry for more of your attention. However your in the best position to decide which one shes trying to pull. In the end protecting your ego makes you look insecure, and its a great way to set yourself up for failure down the road. Look you can let it slide, and you should. You might think by now that I'm trying to put you down for having a beligerent attitude concerning this whole situation, but the fact of the matter is that I hate to see people with potential ruin it by making irrational decisions. All I ask is that you choose the right one.
 

flexion_

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I'm not quite sure what the disrespect was? I'd just ignore simple single things that happen with women as they will make mistakes like anyone else.

When the the disrespect becomes a trend you need to put your foot down.
 

00Kevin

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Did she disrespect you? You bet!

Your gut instincts are correct about this girl already.

The way to deal with this situation is to have pity on her for being imature as a woman.

All that you can do is continue to look for other women who are not that imature. If she comes around then be happy, otherwise just show pity on her for being lacking in respect.
 

milrenkb

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flexion_ said:
When the the disrespect becomes a trend you need to put your foot down.
Take notes my friend. This is something you need to commit to memory.

Personally when I put my foot down I keep myself in a cool and collected state of mind. You maintain eye contact, you call her out on the issue, and let it be known that you'll be on your way unless she corrects her behavior.

Sarge on.
 
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Hawke

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milrenkb, you seem to know your stuff. I'd like to ask you if you have any examples from your life of you putting your foot down. Dealing with disrespect is still an area i always have some trouble with.
 

milrenkb

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Hawke said:
milrenkb, you seem to know your stuff. I'd like to ask you if you have any examples from your life of you putting your foot down. Dealing with disrespect is still an area i always have some trouble with.
I appreciate the respect. As for an example from my life:

There was this one girl I was seeing in my early DJ days named Amy. Now at the time because of the way my day was structured I had a class that met once a week for 2 hours at 6:30 pm. So one Thursday she texts me in the middle of class and ask if she can wait for me at my apartment. I thought sure, why not, my roomates were already there so she can just watch TV or do her homework till I got there plus she had waited there before.

However when I got back from class she wasn't there. Then I realized my car was gone (I didn't have a parking pass at the time so I had to hitch a ride to class). Ironcially her stuff was in my room but she was nowhere to be found. I then looked in my desk and also learned that my spare key was gone. When I asked my roomate if he had seen where she went he said that she had gone up to the gas station (ironically she was getting some wine for that night, however she wasn't 21 at the time and was using her fake ID to get it). 5 minutes later she walks in the door, gives me a kiss and hands me my spare key. The funny thing was that this was the second time she had done it but I wasn't around to find out the first time because she had gotten back from her errand before I walked in the door. (My roomate eventually told me that he thought that she had my permission to take my car)

It was then that I took her by the hand, very calmly and sat her down on my bed. I told her 'look, you can't just take my car out whenever you feel like it. If you get in an accident," I then grabbed the wine, " then the officer finds the alcohol and learns that you purchased it illegaly what happens?" I then pointed out to her that no one gets to drive my care unless they're assuming the role of DD and they're taking me to a bar.

At that point I made sure to address that while I thought that it was sweet that she was getting something for us, that the way she went about it was completly unacceptable. Long story short, she appoligized, we had a very long enjoyable night, and she never drove my car again.

Hope this helps.
 

spitkicker

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if a girl disrespects you, tell her. Say "I thought you were a nice girl, but you know what, you aren't, it's too bad..." Don't get all emotional, just tell her matter of fact. Then move on. You're just being honest. No? No games.

She'll come chasing..
 

MetalFortress

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flexion_ said:
I'm not quite sure what the disrespect was? I'd just ignore simple single things that happen with women as they will make mistakes like anyone else.

When the the disrespect becomes a trend you need to put your foot down.
I agree - looks like you're one of the few who is speaking from experience here. Fretting over stupid crap is going to make you crazy, and acting like a girl about it will just get you disrespected even further.
 

Hawke

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milrenkb said:
I appreciate the respect. As for an example from my life:

Hope this helps.
That helps a lot, thanks for that.
 

*******

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If you don't see the disrespect in a girl walking out on you then you guys need to man up. All actions that are considered disatisfactory should be punished. thats how you teach her how to act if she wants to be with you. I have been in this site for a while, but barely get to post. When i do post, is more of an experiment.
 

milrenkb

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******* said:
If you don't see the disrespect in a girl walking out on you then you guys need to man up. All actions that are considered disatisfactory should be punished. thats how you teach her how to act if she wants to be with you. I have been in this site for a while, but barely get to post. When i do post, is more of an experiment.

Hey you asked for help and we delivered. If you don't want to follow the advice we gave then quite frankly you don't have to.

Just remember life is 10% what happens to you and 90% how you react to it.
 
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