Random NYE night, should I follow up?

[Mr. Goods]

First, Happy New Year's! Here's hoping there were some good times.

My night was fun, but also left me with some good things to ponder going into 2011. I went to visit a friend of mine in our nearby city. In this group were also some people we knew from college. In the small group, there were two HB's (one HB7 and one HB8). HB8 used a lot of kino, but she is also BPD, so nothing really came from that. We all went to a club, and I ended up getting a kiss from the HB7 at midnight. She said she liked it, so, as any guy would do, I made an attempt to escalate, to which she said no. No big deal, it's not rare. About an hour later - after I had already left with a small group and was heading home - she calls me to, "hang out at a bar they were going to." I was already on the way home, so I didn't change course. To me, it wasn't worth it. Interesting though, how she says yes, then says no, then wants to go for it again. Maybe my game has improved as of late...getting into the heads of the prudes .

However, this was not the most interesting case of the night. I took the train home, where I ran into a couple people I went to high school with. In the group was a stunning HB9.5 I didn't really know back then, about 4-5 years ago. Though I was near the group as a whole, HB9.5 sat right by me for the trip. She was smiling, laughing, and seemed interested in our conversation, good deal. The only strange nugget was she randomly told me she had a date the following night, but seemed not-excited/eager/into it (didn't say it outright, but appeared down about it and rolled her eyes). I could have tried to do more, except for that she got a call from her friend right then who said she wouldn't pick her up from the train station. This led to a 30-minute back-and-forth within the call. So much for getting her number when my stop came. Fortunately, we are friends on Facebook. I don't really do Facebook game, but is there a way I can get things going and somehow manage to snag a date?

One of my New Year's resolutions, when it comes to social/girls stuff, is to be more aggressive and take more risks. It's better to burn out than fade away. At bars/parties, this has obvious meaning (more approaching). When it comes to Facebook or phone numbers, I plan on taking advantage of those resources.

 

[Mr. Goods]

What would be the best way to go about the girl I saw on the train? I would probably e-mail her or PM her and see if things can pick up from there. Unfortunately, my online game is not the sharpest took in my arsenal, so maybe a gist of what to do would be appreciated.

 

[JustLurk]

What would be the best way to go about the girl I saw on the train? I would probably e-mail her or PM her and see if things can pick up from there. Unfortunately, my online game is not the sharpest took in my arsenal, so maybe a gist of what to do would be appreciated.

If you think online game is worth a try, why not. As you're not sharp there, try to directly push into zones of game you're good at, e.g. get her to see you face-to-face ASAP. A simple hey IDENTIFY and wanna meet up might do it. By all means make it sound cooler/less needy, whatever. Don't try fancy with online game when you're not experienced, just try to directly lead out of online game right into calling/meeting face to face.

 

[ARrocket]

If you think online game is worth a try, why not. As you're not sharp there, try to directly push into zones of game you're good at, e.g. get her to see you face-to-face ASAP. A simple hey IDENTIFY and wanna meet up might do it. By all means make it sound cooler/less needy, whatever. Don't try fancy with online game when you're not experienced, just try to directly lead out of online game right into calling/meeting face to face.

Agreed. See, the thing that you have going for you is that you ALREADY knew her, even if just slightly. It's not some random girl you are gaming on POF or something, so you can use that to your advantage. Just hit her up and tell her that it was good seeing her, and that she needs to come out with you sometime. Get the number, and take it from there. I doubt you'll find any problems there.

 

[Mr. Goods]

Thanks for the advice, I think you guys are right. Good stuff.

There has been a new wrinkle thrown into the equation (of course): I ran into another girl from my HS who I only know a little bit last night. She was with a couple of friends, but we small-talked momentarily. The same thing happened with this girl a few weeks back. She cute, seems cool, probably a HB8. Some light kino both ways. However, I think she may have a bf. While a couple of pictures on Facebook suggest this (nothing is obvious), she did not spend Christmas or NYE with any specific guy (based on our smalltalk - she said just with family) and I haven't seen any bf-type guy the two times I saw her out.

Since the advice above is very good, I can just send the same thing to both girls, right? Well...I can't do that. The two girls are friends. This means that I only have one shot with both of them combined. If the one I pursue has a bf, then I'm sunk on both fronts. Both of the girls are cool, I'd be content with either lol.

 

[Mr. Goods]

I just wanted to add that I'd prefer to get "the note" out tonight. Strike while the iron is hot. Is the only thing I can do is make an educated guess as to which of the two is single and see what happens?

 

[SandHawk]

I read the topic title as "Random NYE fight, should I show up" and didn't really get what you were getting at until I read the underlined line and re-read topic title. Jeebus, you think there's something wrong with me?

 

[Mr. Goods]

ARrocket...which is better? The advice you gave me above, or the advice you gave in another thread here:

Facebook is like real life...you gotta develop some attraction before you can make your move, otherwise, you'll fail.

What I usually do is start off with a nice C&F comment on one of their statuses or pictures or something. And then leave it alone for like a week or so. Or sometimes I poke them. They'll poke back, and then I'll leave it alone. Gotta get them thinking about you, even if only very briefly.

Ok, so now you're (hopefully) relevant. Then, I'll wait until they're online. Find some B.S. reason to talk to them...something I've always fallen back on is mention how I had a dream that they were in (describe the activity you were doing...I usually try to make it innocent but the way I describe it comes off as mildly sexual. And make sure to tell them how awesome it was, whatever you were doing).

Anyway, that's just what I do, but you get the idea. Build some attraction, THEN get the number. Just get the number, don't try to set something up over Facebook.

There's probably a little difference in the two situations, but I'm not sure which is preferable.

 

[ARrocket]

The advice I posted in the other thread pertained to situations in which you haven't really spoken to the girl in awhile...in other words, an attempt to get her to remember you and how freakin awesome you are.

For your situation, I still stand by my previous post in this thread. You just saw her, so it's different.

 

[ARrocket]

Damn

 

[ARrocket]

I swear I only hit "post" once.

 

[Mr. Goods]

The advice I posted in the other thread pertained to situations in which you haven't really spoken to the girl in awhile...in other words, an attempt to get her to remember you and how freakin awesome you are.

For your situation, I still stand by my previous post in this thread. You just saw her, so it's different.

Got it. Thanks for the clear-up. It's good advice so I just wanted to make sure before I use it lol.

EDIT: Alright, I did a little investigating (aka looking through Facebook pages)...both girls have bf's. Oh well. I don't need to send the note now, but the advice here will help in the future.

 

[Mr. Goods]

This may seem like an unnecessary bump, but in moments of despair comes an moment of great idea and possible triumph:

Sure they seem to have bf's, but I get along with them just fine (albeit I don't know them really well) and their friends seem decent enough. I can message both of them (different, short personalized-specific messages of course) seeing if we can get a small group to meet up at a local bar we all go to anyway, or something like that.

My friends and I really need to expand out social group with girls, and things here are boring as it is. If this were to work, it can add something we don't have right now. The only thing I need to watch for is not messaging both girls at the same time. I sent it to one already, but may wait until later for the other. I wouldn't know they are really good friends from when I saw them because they were with other people, but I don't want to run the risk of them going to each other saying, "We both got a similar message from Mr. Goods! Is this something he does to every girl?" and therefore looking like a creep.

Your thoughts?...besides that I'm over-thinking.

 

[PectoralisMajor]

your over thinking and trying too hard?

 

[Mr. Goods]

your over thinking and trying too hard?

Well, besides that lol. I do tend to over-scheme about things, but more often than not the results justify it. Just wanted to know if what I wanted to do now would blow up in my face or not.