Ran into my gf's old one night stand guy today....

[Latinoman]

I beg to differ. She's my very good friend, we just had one drunken night.

Would you have sex with your sister one drunken night?

That's how "friends" should be viewed. As brothers and sisters.

Using the term "friend" too loose is what brings heart and head aches into our lives.

 

[Golden Arms]

Would you have sex with your sister one drunken night?

That's how "friends" should be viewed. As brothers and sisters.

Using the term "friend" too loose is what brings heart and head aches into our lives.

So yeah, that's a pretty reasonable comparison :crackup:

Friends are not siblings. Me and her view each other as best friends, and what anyone else thinks, much less someone who hasn't met either of us, doesn't matter

 

[Latinoman]

So yeah, that's a pretty reasonable comparison :crackup:

Friends are not siblings.

Fact is...TRUE FRIENDS should be as high as a sibling. Because "siblings" are practically ACCIDENTS (a random spematozoid finding a random egg). While a friend is something that YOU have chosen based on a number of qualities.

If people would take the correct approach to "friendship" then today we would have considerably less betrayals.

Don't call a woman you had a random one-night-stand "your best friend". That, on itself, is VERY AFC. As it is very rare to find a Man having a Woman "best friend". And the very few times that happen, it is view more as a brotherhood/sisterhood thing.

 

[speed dawg]

Put it this way Golden Arms,

If I was dating your "friend", assuming we were attracted to each other, and I found out she was "best friends" with someone she used to fukk, or even if I notice that she spends alot of time of with another guy who is "just a friend", she would be immediately relegated to fukkbuddy status. I wouldn't go out of my way at all for her. You can't have your cake and eat it too.

If she liked me enough, she'd probably ditch you. If not, apparently she'd rather be "friends" with a guy (you) than be with me, so another plate would take priority. Only an AFC would continue "courting" an attention wh0re.

Edited to say: Apparently this girl doesn't think too much of you to want to date other guys when she KNOWS she could have you. I'm guessing that SHE calls you a friend. I'd be willing to bet that if she ever gave you the time of day again you'd definitely be down. If nothing else, you are hurting the girl's chances. And she probably has pretty low self esteem. I think Latinoman pegged you right when he said it was very AFC.

 

[Golden Arms]

Fact is...TRUE FRIENDS should be as high as a sibling. Because "siblings" are practically ACCIDENTS (a random spematozoid finding a random egg). While a friend is something that YOU have chosen based on a number of qualities.

If people would take the correct approach to "friendship" then today we would have considerably less betrayals.

Don't call a woman you had a random one-night-stand "your best friend". That, on itself, is VERY AFC. As it is very rare to find a Man having a Woman "best friend". And the very few times that happen, it is view more as a brotherhood/sisterhood thing.

First - If, it's VERY AFC, then I am an extreme AFC, oh well But we were tight way before we slept together... I do have other best friends, guys, who I am closer to and have known longer, but since I moved to a new city far away from everyone I knew a year ago, she's been it.

Second - the problem is you and I simply define "friendship" differently. I respect your opinion even though I still say that your incest comparison is a great exaggeration.

Third - I am not really caught up on definitions anyhow. I don't care what defines AFC, RAFC, DJ, yadda yadda.. You seem to be very keen on defining everything - If you do this, you're AFC; Friends are supposed to be this and this.. Call it whatever you want; you certianly don't have to consider two strangers you've read about on the Internet "friends", just like I don't have to consider a stranger's opinion about how I live my life, so let's just agree to disagree.

I do agree with this sentence you wrote, however - "If people would take the correct approach to "friendship" then today we would have considerably less betrayals"..

 

[Golden Arms]

Put it this way Golden Arms,

If I was dating your "friend", assuming we were attracted to each other, and I found out she was "best friends" with someone she used to fukk, or even if I notice that she spends alot of time of with another guy who is "just a friend", she would be immediately relegated to fukkbuddy status. I wouldn't go out of my way at all for her. You can't have your cake and eat it too.

Awesome... I understand that.

Edited to say: Apparently this girl doesn't think too much of you to want to date other guys when she KNOWS she could have you.

Wrong. I told her it would never happen again.

 

[Latinoman]

First - If, it's VERY AFC, then I am an extreme AFC, oh well But we were tight way before we slept together... I do have other best friends, guys, who I am closer to and have known longer, but since I moved to a new city far away from everyone I knew a year ago, she's been it.

Second - the problem is you and I simply define "friendship" differently. I respect your opinion even though I still say that your incest comparison is a great exaggeration.

Third - I am not really caught up on definitions anyhow. I don't care what defines AFC, RAFC, DJ, yadda yadda.. You seem to be very keen on defining everything - If you do this, you're AFC; Friends are supposed to be this and this.. Call it whatever you want; you certianly don't have to consider two strangers you've read about on the Internet "friends", just like I don't have to consider a stranger's opinion about how I live my life, so let's just agree to disagree.

I do agree with this sentence you wrote, however - "If people would take the correct approach to "friendship" then today we would have considerably less betrayals"..

Very defensive...ain't you?

And multiple "best" friends?

You might even say she is a "friend". But using the "best" friend thing and then the ONS too...it is more than laughable.

 

[Golden Arms]

*shrug*

OK, just a friend then... like I said you're too caught up in definitions

 

[Latinoman]

*shrug*

OK, just a friend then... like I said you're too caught up in definitions

Well...in order to communicate a message propertly (and for EVERY ONE to understand), then we must define things.

 

[Victory Unlimited]

Men can't be "friends" with women that make their Diicks HARD.

 

[Latinoman]

Men can't be "friends" with women that make their Diicks HARD.

You are EXACTLY right.

 

[Golden Arms]

Well...in order to communicate a message propertly (and for EVERY ONE to understand), then we must define things.

Agreed, to an extent.. however, we must not mistake the symbols for reality

.. but anyway, I am getting off track here. I do believe you made some valid points, thanks for giving me a different perspective.

 

[dietzcoi]

All of you are missing something here.

Those who say "The girl is fukking you now, you were the winner, she dumped the ex for you, you won" may be very wrong!

What if the ex dumped HER and now she is SETTLING for you.. you are the loser, not the winner!

How will you explain that away or make the OP happy about what is going on? Maybe she WANTS the old ONS and just settled for him when she could not get the ONS as a BF?

Think about it.. he may be the big chump instead of the big winner here....

Dietzcoi

 

[Bourne]

Well you can live your life thinking through what she has been through and what she is. Basically living your life through someone else.

or

You can be who you are and forget other people's past and live by your own standards and your own life.

First one is easy and majority is doing just that right now.
Second one is extremely hard and requires you to face alot of hard inner times and alot of demons.

Choice is yours man.

 

[dietzcoi]

Bourne

You are definitely right about the demons... lots of demons.

But ignoring "third party perspective" is also wrong... would you marry a whale, like in "Shallow Hal", just because YOU saw her as beautiful and 99.9% of the rest of the world laughed at you behind your back?

You do have to take the rest of the world into consideration. It is good to ignore society and not be a sheep to a certain point, but you also have to deal with reality and not your own fantasies...

Dietzcoi

 

[speed dawg]

All of you are missing something here.

Those who say "The girl is fukking you now, you were the winner, she dumped the ex for you, you won" may be very wrong!

What if the ex dumped HER and now she is SETTLING for you.. you are the loser, not the winner!

How will you explain that away or make the OP happy about what is going on? Maybe she WANTS the old ONS and just settled for him when she could not get the ONS as a BF?

Think about it.. he may be the big chump instead of the big winner here....

Dietzcoi

This is interesting. I guess the answer is, whoever she's attracted to most will eventually win out.